~ CONFESSIONS! ~ ( Keep it PG13! )

[MearaT]

Oof. Why have I not posted in this thread yet?
CONFESSIONS:
#1-I am not perfect.
I am the oldest out of a small group of girls in my town, and I love them all. I pretend that I can take care of them no matter what, and let them come crash on my couch whenever they need to get away. (Oh, I'm seventeen--almost eighteen-- but have been in charge of my house and three siblings lately... long story... ^^; wink
But I really can't. Some days I wonder how I claim to take care of them when I can't even take care of myself.
But I keep doing it because if I don't, I feel awful.

#2-I ate a quart of white-chocolate macadamia cookie dough last night. ninja

#3-I die a little inside whenever someone tells me how skinny I am. I had a friend start cutting in the seventh grade because she 'couldn't look like me.' This didn't boost my ego. It didn't make me feel skinny or pretty. It made me feel like a bad person.

#4-When I was seven, my little brother was bugging me, so I told him to go play on the monkey bars. He got stung by bees that had been nesting there. To this day I can't forgive myself for it.

#5

Rei Uchikino

I'm wearing feet pajamas.
ninja

So am I. >>

 

[flangella]

I sometimes wish that I was overweight just so all of the anorexia accusations would go away. I've tried. I eat so much junk - chocolate, chips, Mountain Dew, carbscarbscarbscarbscarbs - and still I barely force the scale to 103. Girl; alright-looking; five-three; fourteen; resembles a toothpick... she must be anorexic.
I hate it.
And all exercising does is make me look even thinner.

Whenever I hear a rap song, I get the urge to start crying. It reminds me of Travis and I really want to just close that chapter of my life already. He is everywhere and nowhere. Still. And though I hate him in the way that all girls hate, I feel like s**t because he insists on staying in love with me despite my unwillingness to even speak with him.

I'm a coward.
When I want to write my boyfriend a letter or song or something - to spill all my love and sweet-nothings to him - I don't. Because I'm afraid of getting the words all wrong and embarrassing myself.

Sometimes I think a little too hard into the prospect of being dead.
After reading The Lovely Bones, I catch myself almost wishing to be up in my own heaven like Susie. To watch all the people I know grow old while time for me stands still.

 

[This Isnt Sparta]

Since alot of guys have been jerks to me in the past when all I do is give and stay faithful, I have grown to have a somewhat distaste in men. Even though Im straight, I sometimes wonder if Im better off in a relationship with a girl.  

[MearaT]

Neko-samaXIII

I sometimes wish that I was overweight just so all of the anorexia accusations would go away. I've tried. I eat so much junk - chocolate, chips, Mountain Dew, carbscarbscarbscarbscarbs - and still I barely force the scale to 103. Girl; alright-looking; five-three; fourteen; resembles a toothpick... she must be anorexic.
I hate it.
And all exercising does is make me look even thinner.

Whenever I hear a rap song, I get the urge to start crying. It reminds me of Travis and I really want to just close that chapter of my life already. He is everywhere and nowhere. Still. And though I hate him in the way that all girls hate, I feel like s**t because he insists on staying in love with me despite my unwillingness to even speak with him.

I'm a coward.
When I want to write my boyfriend a letter or song or something - to spill all my love and sweet-nothings to him - I don't. Because I'm afraid of getting the words all wrong and embarrassing myself.

Sometimes I think a little too hard into the prospect of being dead.
After reading The Lovely Bones, I catch myself almost wishing to be up in my own heaven like Susie. To watch all the people I know grow old while time for me stands still.

Aw, honey.
I think I've had a tidbit off each in my life, but not all at once. I deal with the first one even now... I'm anemic and have other problems that cause me to go to the hospital a lot for blood tests and whatnot. It really makes people suspicious. =.=

This Isn't Sparta

Since alot of guys have been jerks to me in the past when all I do is give and stay faithful, I have grown to have a somewhat distaste in men. Even though Im straight, I sometimes wonder if Im better off in a relationship with a girl.

Ditto on that. I think at least a few girls have felt that way.
(I hope it was okay to say anything on these)

 

[Hersheydudette]

~ After reading some of the anorexic posts, sorry, but... I think I'm fat. I don't know if I actually am... I suppose it depends upon your definition of fat. I hate my somewhat saggy cheeks and my sides and my stomach, though. Even my legs are kind of big around my knees. I hate it. And I can't make myself stop eating (as much). I've considered and sort of wished that I could make myself throw up, but don't worry, I'll never do it. But I need discipline.

~ I don't tell my secrets to anyone. Maybe I'll tell like three to my friends, finally telling them who I like or whatever. I know it's stupid, but it makes me feel like I'm making myself weaker or something if I use that outlet. And I don't need it. I'm perfectly fine without it. :3

~ I have guy problems. First, I apparently suck at setting physical limits. Mind you, I've never had a boyfriend nor a first kiss, so it's nothing like that. But I feel like maybe I shouldn't use guys as furniture or blankets unless I actually like them as more than friends.

~ Also, on the guy thing, I'm starting to realize that I don't want a boyfriend unless I seriously think I want to spend the rest of my life with him. The problem is, I'm having an extraordinarily hard time finding someone I'm attracted to as more than a friend. At all. I mean, a lot of times I'm like, oh, he's cute. But after a little bit, it's always like, oh not attracted to him. And the cute ones never even TALK to me. =(

~ It really frustrates me that the only people I've managed to really become friends with around here are so... uncool? I know that makes me sound totally shallow (and I kind of am, I guess) but it's the only word I can think of. They're all engineers and always talk about stuff I don't care about, like how this would function and what would happen if we applied this theory to that. It's not that they're nerdy--I'm plenty nerdy. I just want to be friends with social science nerds like myself. And it frustrates me so much that nobody like that will just come up and talk to me. And if I try to talk to them, they leave me alone. I know I'm not that pretty, but I'm not that offensive-looking. Why doesn't anyone else in the freshman honors program (except short, sometimes rude, glasses-wearing homeschooled Michael) like me enough to want to hang out with me? =(  

[powwiful]

...I still like him. Even though I've already told myself a guhzuhbillzillion times already that I'm over it.

...I MISS MY BIG SISSSSS!!! T^T

...I have a C in science and the quarter is just about to end. My family expects me to get straight A's, as always.

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♥

 

[Captain Mansym]

Nobody knows but...
I really Hate my life  

[Kaiko luv]

Sometimes, I feel like I'm the meanest older sister in the world. Whenever my brother annoys me, we get into fights(not all the time). Even though fighting is kind of normal between siblings, i feel like im to hard on him. He is in fourth grade by the way. Anyways, whenever I get mad or something of the sort, even if it wasn't his fault I was upset I just lash all my anger out at him. When we get into fights, I sometimes she throw him onto the ground repeatedly or bang his head onto things( actually I do that to anybody I get into fights with, mainly family). Everytime I do it I just feel all bad inside, like I slowly eating my soul away.  

[BlissfulCalamity]

I despise being human, but for some reason I can't imagine being anything else. I wish all the stupid humans in the world who will do nothing significant would just disappear. We're just gonna be born, ruin the planet some, and die. If we have no purpose, then why exist? :/

I think I might love my pets more than my own family. My pets are my family.

I used to cut, just tiny little cuts for no real reason, and I think I might start again. This time, I'll keep it a secret even from the people who knew.

I've kissed someone once. And he literally wasn't a human.

I still sleep with my stuffed animals. In fact I can not sleep if I don't have something to hug.

I don't want to grow up. I want to be a kid forever.

I can make myself think I love someone if I think they want/need someone. I would date someone just to see them be happy again. I help the most random people. I can't be mean to anyone except my own family. Even people who have declared me their enemy. I can't ignore anyone who needs help. Even bees. I'l pull a drawning bee out of a cup of soda and put it in the sun so it can dry off. I'll babysit it until I know it's fine and it flies away.

I have a C in World History class. I'm afraid to get regular classes next year because I've done Honors/AP classes all my life. I'm afraid I'll be a disappointment. Everyone has always expected so much of me. Even when I was in kindergarten.

I spent hours on a drawing for my dad last fathers day. He didn't even bother to look at it. He just kicked me off the computer. Didn't even bother to see what I was doing.

I think the main reason I haven't left piano class to get an art class is because playing the piano is the only thing I know my dad is even remotely proud of.

When I'm by myself and playing the piano, I make random jerking movements with my arms, my head, sometimes when I'm playing something "dramatic" I'll finish playing it and find myself standing up, even breathing hard. I love playing the piano. And yet...


I can't play piano in front of people. I get nervous, even when I play something I know by heart, and I start shivering to the point where I can't do anything with my hands, I almost can't even talk. I forget the notes and I don't remember if I actually played everything when I'm done. I'm going to have to play in front of people at some kind of festival in front of some kind of judge in Flagstaff this year.

I talk to myself, I talk to my characters and the voices in my head. I talk to animals, I talk to plants, I talk to inanimate objects. If I bump into a chair or table, I'll apologize to it. If I drop a pencil, I'll apologize to it. I find it extremely difficult to talk to people every day.

I get into the pizza line every single day at lunch because I'm too afraid to go to any other lines.

I miss Kyle. I miss Joseph. I wish I hadn't hurt Joseph like that.

I know my friends from where I used to live are going to forget me. I know I'll probably stalk them when they do, because I can't live without being sure that everyone is absolutely healthy and fine.

I once stalked someone and ended up with his mom's cell phone number. Just so I could try and help him with a puppy he had found. I didn't call in time, they had taken him to the pound.

I'm a member of at least 25 different websites.

I should stop now. >.> had to let it all out.  

[Sexual Harrassment Rhino]

The only confession I need to get out;

I secretly hate myself, everything about me: my fat, my stretch marks, my stomach, my thighs, my face, my facial features, my hair, my skin, and no one knows about it. I pretend to have confidence, I try to find confidence in myself, but it doesn't work.  

[Tsukuyomi25021]

I did stuff I regret last summer. [not that severe but my family would be ashamed]
So I played truth or dare, being the only girl and like... 3 or 4 guys.
- I've stripped to bra and underwear (not so bad...)
- one of them saw me completely naked (Embarassed!!)
- I kissed 3 guys blindfolded and 1 missed... i'm not even attracted to any of them so it makes me feel nasty
(same with the guy seeing me naked... i actually hated him even before it)
- they also had to lick stuff off me
- thats all i remember from it
Then theres last summer: holding drugs for the first and only time of my life.

Also.........
- All the ones about being fat, i feel your pain as well...my a** and thighs are too big, i'm too short, and i'm fashionably slow
- I really feel pressured to do well in school  

[relish-jam]

i overheard that my parents were only supposed to be married for 5 years at most.  

[Stormgem]

Confessions of a miget:

1.) I should be studying for my University entrance exams which are about 2 weeks away. But I'm on Gaia/Facebook. XP
2.) I'm hoplessly in love with my best friend.
3.) I actually dislike my brother so much - he's the golden child in my family. Spoilt rotten and can't do anything wrong even though he's always in trouble at school....make any sense to you? Doesn't to me.
4.) I still haven't recovered from the shock of my friends suacide a year ago. I'm angry at her, and I'm also sad. Its the most selfish thing anyone could ever do.
5.) I have NO motivation to do anything. I really need to work on this...else I'll fail my exams and not be able to attend Uni.
6.) I wish I was either taller or at least 3-5kg's lighter. I'm not fat - just slightly chubby. And with my lack of hight it shows. So I probably should get back on my 'eat less or train more diet'......

Thaaaaats about all I think.  

[amaranthineP]

I confess that I'm not innocent anymore. [YAOI!!]

I kind of... like watching people fail and suffer. ><

I secretly want to hit a friend of mine for being a bi**sneezes**.

I'm annoyed with another friend because she's a bit TOO clingy, but I just don't have the courage to tell her.

I want to get into the honor section next school year [really, REALLY want to], but I'm too lazy to study hard.

My first 'boyfriend' was a girl. blaugh And I still love her, even though we broke up almost 6 months ago. I still get jealous when she's too close to other people [boy OR girl], even though I have no right to. [no i'm not bi]

I hate myself for being a childish birdbrain.

Sometimes, I wish that I'd never been born. Seriously.

Sometimes, I also wish that I'd been born as a boy.

I am an attention-seeker.

Uhh... That's all. ^///^

 

[Dazed Poppet]

1. I really hate myself. My body, my face, my personality, my voice, everything.

2. I'm extremely jealous of true friendship.

3. (In addition to #2) I feel like my friends and I aren't really friends. We just hang out because no one else likes us.

4. I have read a whole hentai series. And liked it.

5. I'm a complete retard. I never do my homework and don't understand anything I'm taught. But I never ask for help or speak my mind because I'm terrified of teachers and other people with authority (like parents). This is because I think they'll see me as an idiot and lower my marks.

6. I may seen like a completely hyperactive person, but I only act like that because I'm trying to hide the fact that deep down, I feel extremely unloved, invisible and disgusting.

7. Also every night, I cry myself to sleep because I'm afraid of the future.

8. I really hate high-expectations.

9. I don't care about alot of things.

10. I'm afraid of not being appreciated.

11. I love gays.

12. My father got another girl pregnant and it's really been bugging me.

13. My mother beats me and doesn't give a flying ******** about what matters to me. Actually, I don't think anyone does.

14. There are days when I feel like shooting up my school.

15. I have liked the same guy since kindergarten. But I don't have the courage to talk to him.

16. I believe in true love and always will.


So this is the Tragedy of Poppet, a girl on strings