weird things i heard so far

[WhatDaFack]

A convo between my friend and I
M=me
F=friend

Me: yay so my cats live in my doghouse because we don't have a dog and we put the cat food in there
F:....your cats live in your doghouse
M: yes
F:..hahaha. wait..what if the cats had diarrhea!
M:..w-what!?
F: and then the cats had it so bad that they blasted out of the doghouse!
M: and bounced off the wall and into the sky!
F: and the diarrhea was on fire!
M: and the the cat would fart and pee at the same time!
F: and its on fire!
M: and then it hits a tree!
F: and it crawls up the tree
M: while still having diarrhea that's on fire!
F: and the tree falls down!
M: and a German Shepard eats the cat!
F: and then the cat has diarrhea in the dog!
M: and then the dog dies and the cats starts flying again! XD
F: and then the cat catches on fire!
M: and then it has babies!
F: and the babies are on fire!
M: and having diarrhea!
F: and it pollutes the sea!
M: and goes into outer space!
F:......*realizes what we're talking about* HAHAHAHAHA
M: ahahahahaa!!
*we both die from laughter*

XP random  

[queeN of whispers]

when dinosaurs roamed the earth, 2 1/2 teaspoons of suger
5 cups of flour 2 cup noodles, and to plant a tree get a seed dig a hole, topp off those pancakes with a maple surup, its alive! woah a alein landed on earth, omg i like just like got a totally sweet text omg! a b c d e f g h i j k l n o p , on top of a mountin lay the great sword of king elizabeth, what u say to me now boy! u get ur great sap from trees, next is sponge bob, woah flying dinosaurs bitting of peoples heads, and the blood is a sigh of, losing!  

[Lady Venamisa]

Hooray for bunny jesus. Blessed be the bunny, the rabbit and the holy hutch! amen!  

[ashleygirlstar22]

well....oh i got it well selenas mother have her in 16 and someone give her a ring in her 12 oh thats super wierd  

[xXxPocketAznxXx]

Ive always said this
Life is like a Strip club on tuesdays it looks all fine and beautiful until u discover she has a pair of balls  

[dark lithia]

Random conversation I had..

f= me
m= him



M= My randomness coloured randomroom of randomness turned out to be random

F= omg flying pancakes

M= Meh... Duke Nukem doesnt do windows

F= I didn't steal the chocolate easter santa the evil hobo down the lake did it

M= orailly?

F= >.>... I swear the winter ice cat isn't drunk it's just a bear

M= Smells like a 3 week old cheese

F= The evil nacho stole my peanutbutter and fish cat, then made him tapdance in the endless red jelly of failure




No idea we were bored and felt like being random  

[Sweet_lil_tomboy]

This is a real conversation I had with a co-worker.
I was setting up a display and stepped back for a moment to observe my progress. After looking at what I had done I said out loud " It's Goood, Goood." (Jim Carey {Bruce Almighty}).
The young lady, who was working on another display right next to me, looked at me as though I was stupid. I looked at her and said "What? It's from Bruce Almighty."
Her response was "I grew up in the '90's not the '50's". I tried to tell her that the movie had come out just a few short years ago but she looked at me like I was crazy and then she said "I've already told you I'm from the '90's not the '50's"
Sorry but I think the bleach they use to make her a blonde, may have killed some of her brain cells.  

[kittyjazz230]

Whhhhat....thats just whheird Whheve whon already.......ah I know its corny but when it was said by one of my freinds it was halarious she got the putting the emphesis on the H's from Family Guy.  

[Demonic Eskimo]

ok i knew someone that went to juvinile hall that saw 2 guys there the conversation is as folows
1= first dude
2=second dude

1 heay man are you gonna hide some weed in your a** agean that s**t taseted like s**t man
2 so i like s**t shut yo ******** camel a** up
1 ok man chill i got an idea
2 ill chill yo balls in my face
1 uhh wtf man
2 sorry i got some s**t in my mouth
1 alright did your toothbrush taste funny
2 yeah
1 .............. ok heres my idea
2 but what abou..
1 ok im going to stick some weed in your dickhole
2 holy s**t man
1 the cops ant gonna find it
2 ( yells ) GET AWAY FROM MY d**k CAMEL a**
1 you ******** a** hole
cop sir plese step away from the dickhole
1 uhh sir i.....
2 NOT MY d**k
cop GET ON THE GROUND AND STEP AWAY FROM THE DICKHOLE
1 ............... goddamnit  

[lanieloo8]

O MY JEEZ UMMMMMMMMM LETS SEE HOLY CRAP I KANT THINK OFIT OH YEAH MINE IZ KOOL LIKE CHOKOLATE OOPS KOOLAID OHHHH CHOKOLATE KOOLAID YUM!!!
lol lol lol lol biggrin rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl PS CALL MI SUPER rofl  

[KimixKupkake]

Ok well i dont know if this considered weird its pretty much just me being stupid but like my friend was joking around and she said shes bipolar and i was like no way i thought she meant she was a polar bear that was bi and so im all like thats so cool and i was like i love polar bears and shes like what are you talking about then i finally realized that wasnt what she meant!!!  

[princess_gansta girl888]

Kelce01

My name is FAN. stands for For. Another. Neck. Which means I will kill a hawk by throwing it down the mountain.

u weird  

[SinistersSweetHeart]

hmm?

idk  

[dem0nicd0rk]

i hear so many every day,and i forget them all sweatdrop  

[NyaSonozaki]

Havent heard or seen nothing like that but, ive sent things like that.
Heres a few weird random things ive commented or messaged to people.
1.If you say that again im gonna stick a metal pole through your pennis then set it on fire and rip it off.
2.Roses are red violets are blue so are dead people to.
3.Everytime you say jesus a hobo is set a blaze.
4.I wanna make a anime one day and there will be happenis,sadness,madness,necrophiliacs, and lollipops the #ucking end.
5.Then last but, not least my vampire joke I sent to my friend.
tTwo girls were talking
girl1:It be awesome to meet a vampire!!!
girl2:No
girl1:why not?
girl2:not this time of month
((If u don't get it heres what its about vampires suck blood and girls have blood that comes out their v****a once a month so thats why girl2 says not this time of month.))