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Do you think being hit straightened you out as a kid?

I was hit and it did help. 0.34939759036145 34.9% [ 29 ]
I was hit and it did not help. 0.4578313253012 45.8% [ 38 ]
I was never hit, but I think it would have helped. 0.024096385542169 2.4% [ 2 ]
I was never hit and I think it would have only done harm. 0.16867469879518 16.9% [ 14 ]
Total Votes:[ 83 ]
This poll closed on July 31, 2014.
No longer accepting new votes.
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Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
After seeing how kids act today, I have to say yes. Beat all of them.


Everyone says this right after they graduate high school.
It's not even every generation.
It just happens to people between graduating high school and twenty. Suddenly every kid is awful when nothing is really any different than it ever was.


Nah...they're getting worse.


No they aren't. You think they are because you've been told your entire life that once you become an adult you're supposed to start yelling about anyone younger than you.


I'm sure you don't know what I've been told my entire life.


Everyone has been told this their entire life. Not directly, but through example and media.
And sometimes it's true.
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91


Nah...they're getting worse.


No they aren't. You think they are because you've been told your entire life that once you become an adult you're supposed to start yelling about anyone younger than you.


I'm sure you don't know what I've been told my entire life.


Everyone has been told this their entire life. Not directly, but through example and media.
And sometimes it's true.


Not really. The only real difference between the generations now and the ones of the past, aside from maybe the one called The Greatest Generation, is that we have the internet and social media to b***h.
The Boomers looked just as terrible to the generation that probably wanted to collectively off themselves once they realized what they spawned as you do to the boomers, and 13 year olds look to you.
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91


Nah...they're getting worse.


No they aren't. You think they are because you've been told your entire life that once you become an adult you're supposed to start yelling about anyone younger than you.


I'm sure you don't know what I've been told my entire life.


Everyone has been told this their entire life. Not directly, but through example and media.
And sometimes it's true.


Not really. The only real difference between the generations now and the ones of the past, aside from maybe the one called The Greatest Generation, is that we have the internet and social media to b***h.
The Boomers looked just as terrible to the generation that probably wanted to collectively off themselves once they realized what they spawned as you do to the boomers, and 13 year olds look to you.
There are many differences between those two generations. The way they were raised and the changing environment does play a part in it.
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91


I'm sure you don't know what I've been told my entire life.


Everyone has been told this their entire life. Not directly, but through example and media.
And sometimes it's true.


Not really. The only real difference between the generations now and the ones of the past, aside from maybe the one called The Greatest Generation, is that we have the internet and social media to b***h.
The Boomers looked just as terrible to the generation that probably wanted to collectively off themselves once they realized what they spawned as you do to the boomers, and 13 year olds look to you.
There are many differences between those two generations. The way they were raised and the changing environment does play a part in it.


Between those two, yes.
After that happened though it kind of became a blur and everyone is about the same. At least behavior-wise.
I just think the endless calling everyone younger than us shitty is annoying lol

Timid Giver

My aunt slapped me a lot the moment I:
Whined,
talked back,
mumbled,
sigh heavily,
made any sign I was going to cry,
was too loud,
was too quite,
or rolled my eyes.

She was the authority, and it was shitty.
Now, I refuse to speak to her, and if I have to be around her, I don't say anything.
Over years of her bullshit, I grew to hate and fear her.
Now she complains that "I don't act like I'm family" and "all I do is sit in my room"

Jee I wonder why b***h.

Ferocious Pumpkin

My mum spanked me as a child. She did it rarely, but when she did I couldn't sit for a week. She didn't do me any favors, all she did was traumatize me.

Children understand way more than we give them credit for. Most parents don't have the patience to talk to a child in a way they can understand, though. Just because it's hard to talk to a child, adults think that children are stupid. Hitting is faster by far. I, however, feel that hitting is an inefficient learning tool compared to an explanation.

Even when a child is told why what they did is wrong before or after a spanking, they might not understand it. Then the child also wouldn't understand why they deserve a spanking. They grow up thinking that's just what you do to bad children is hit them. And not every parent controls how hard or how often they hit their children. This results in child abuse, yaaaaayy! stare

Wheezing Fatcat

Gay African Mammoth
and dancing ensued
Gay African Mammoth
and dancing ensued
Gay African Mammoth
and dancing ensued


well it's more like i'm asking if you've been thinking about this topic this whole time lol

i'm opposed to hitting in general, so that includes hitting kids.
i usually tell my step-siblings to treat people respectfully if they want to be treated respectfully, because if they mistreat people they're probably going to get mistreated as well.
hitting kids just leads to more problems.
According to a lot of the people here it's quite the opposite. Evidently being hit did them good, and I can't say that that is untrue. Maybe it really is true that both have a time and a place.


i'm not convinced.
my brother and i were both spanked - it worked for him, but not for me.
hitting, spanking, i see them as acts of aggression.
hearing someone try to justify hurting me with "it's your fault i hit you because you were misbehaving" just made me not trust them. i knew they didn't like what i did, because they hit me, but it never taught me how to act; it just taught me to avoid the source of the pain.
I get what you mean, but I don't know if I agree that spanking is automatically or inherently an act of aggression. And it sounds to me like when you were spanked or hit, your parents didn't also talk to you and help you understand why it is they did so , and what it was they were trying to teach you. Like I said to me it's not a first thing to go to, if you do then you're abusive and don't understand how to raise a child. There IS a proper way to spank your child, and have them learn from it, without causing the child any mental anguish or harm.


spanking isn't gentle. you are taking the control out of their hands, preventing them from running, bending them over your knee and slapping their butt. if there are others watching it can be humiliating.

i was paraphrasing that quote, my mom always explained.
hitting or spanking made me mad and stubborn, so i refused to listen anymore. i learned how to act in public from people outside of my home, people i trusted because they didn't punish me physically.
If spanking wasn't the answer for you and it didn't fix anything, then your mom was being unnecessary. No one propagates spanking where it isn't necessary or teaches a really good lesson. Someone in the thread spoke about spanking your kid on the hand if they stole something to show them that there are severe punishments for doing this sort of thing, and that later on in life the punishments are far worse. I can get behind this sort of thinking.

Also I don't believe humiliating your kid is an effective means of discipline.


ok so if it wasn't necessary for me, then how can you advocate it will work for everyone?

if no one misused spanking like you say, then this would apply to my mom as well.
the first few times, she had the same point of view as people in this thread. she thought since it worked well with my brother, it would work with me too, but it didn't. the fact that people think spanking is going to work 100% of the time is not something i agree with. my mom didn't spank me differently than any other mom, other people were ok with how she handled me, it was me that wasn't ok with it. she stopped spanking me because she learned reasoning with me worked better, and eventually i trusted her again.

kids act out for different reasons. i used to act out in stores because i would get tired or overheated. there is never going to be a kid that doesn't act out, regardless of how the parent punishes them, but there are different ways of solving such problems. if a child is spoiled, and throws a tantrum and is beyond reason, then i don't think spanking is going to make that go away. if the reason why the child is spoiled doesn't get solved or go away also, you just end up using short term solutions for a long term problem and the child won't understand because you aren't being consistent with what you're trying to teach them.

there are better ways to discipline, especially when stealing. recently my step-siblings stole some chocolate from the store. we didn't hit them or spank them, we marched them back in and had them give the item back to a worker in the store and apologize. we asked the security guard to give them a lecture. this was the only thing my mom taught me that really stuck with me when she did the same thing to me, but i haven't stolen anything from a store since i was little. i was embarrassed at the time, but it worked for me. it worked on varying levels with 2 of my step-siblings too, but the third doesn't listen to anything (my mom has tried spanking her also) so i think there might be something deeper going on with her.

Shameless Man-Lover

It should be used sparingly and only when other methods of punishment do not work when done correctly (time outs, grounding, other rules, etc).

Sugary Cat

I got hit and if I have children and they need to be hit, then I will hit them aswell. The trick is not to do it with full force but still hard enough that they learn something from it. You don't want your kids to go to school with blue spots.

Profitable Gekko

and dancing ensued
Gay African Mammoth
and dancing ensued
Gay African Mammoth
and dancing ensued


i'm not convinced.
my brother and i were both spanked - it worked for him, but not for me.
hitting, spanking, i see them as acts of aggression.
hearing someone try to justify hurting me with "it's your fault i hit you because you were misbehaving" just made me not trust them. i knew they didn't like what i did, because they hit me, but it never taught me how to act; it just taught me to avoid the source of the pain.
I get what you mean, but I don't know if I agree that spanking is automatically or inherently an act of aggression. And it sounds to me like when you were spanked or hit, your parents didn't also talk to you and help you understand why it is they did so , and what it was they were trying to teach you. Like I said to me it's not a first thing to go to, if you do then you're abusive and don't understand how to raise a child. There IS a proper way to spank your child, and have them learn from it, without causing the child any mental anguish or harm.


spanking isn't gentle. you are taking the control out of their hands, preventing them from running, bending them over your knee and slapping their butt. if there are others watching it can be humiliating.

i was paraphrasing that quote, my mom always explained.
hitting or spanking made me mad and stubborn, so i refused to listen anymore. i learned how to act in public from people outside of my home, people i trusted because they didn't punish me physically.
If spanking wasn't the answer for you and it didn't fix anything, then your mom was being unnecessary. No one propagates spanking where it isn't necessary or teaches a really good lesson. Someone in the thread spoke about spanking your kid on the hand if they stole something to show them that there are severe punishments for doing this sort of thing, and that later on in life the punishments are far worse. I can get behind this sort of thinking.

Also I don't believe humiliating your kid is an effective means of discipline.


ok so if it wasn't necessary for me, then how can you advocate it will work for everyone?

if no one misused spanking like you say, then this would apply to my mom as well.
the first few times, she had the same point of view as people in this thread. she thought since it worked well with my brother, it would work with me too, but it didn't. the fact that people think spanking is going to work 100% of the time is not something i agree with. my mom didn't spank me differently than any other mom, other people were ok with how she handled me, it was me that wasn't ok with it. she stopped spanking me because she learned reasoning with me worked better, and eventually i trusted her again.

kids act out for different reasons. i used to act out in stores because i would get tired or overheated. there is never going to be a kid that doesn't act out, regardless of how the parent punishes them, but there are different ways of solving such problems. if a child is spoiled, and throws a tantrum and is beyond reason, then i don't think spanking is going to make that go away. if the reason why the child is spoiled doesn't get solved or go away also, you just end up using short term solutions for a long term problem and the child won't understand because you aren't being consistent with what you're trying to teach them.

there are better ways to discipline, especially when stealing. recently my step-siblings stole some chocolate from the store. we didn't hit them or spank them, we marched them back in and had them give the item back to a worker in the store and apologize. we asked the security guard to give them a lecture. this was the only thing my mom taught me that really stuck with me when she did the same thing to me, but i haven't stolen anything from a store since i was little. i was embarrassed at the time, but it worked for me. it worked on varying levels with 2 of my step-siblings too, but the third doesn't listen to anything (my mom has tried spanking her also) so i think there might be something deeper going on with her.
Alright quick error fix, I ment nobody "here" participating in this ongoing conversation propagates spanking a child where it isn't necessary. At least I'm pretty sure, I haven't read every single reply.

But in terms of how to deal with a child that is throwing a tantrum and you not thinking that a spanking will make it go away, that's exactly that, what "you think". There have already been several people in here whom have given their first hand situations with it, and say that it did in fact work, so what do you say to them :/ ? And for sure you have to cut the head off of the snake, I agree there, and so does everyone else here whom believes a sensible spanking helps.

In terms of disciplining a kid for stealing, no your way is not necessarily better. It's a pretty good way I will say, but it's not necessarily better. We've had people whom have studied child psychology talk in this thread today and they also agree that there is nothing wrong with a spanking when accompanied with reason and used sparsely. You want it to be automatically wrong so badly because it was automatically wrong for you, but it just isn't because you weren't every kid who's ever had issues, and you don't know if any of them getting a quick hit on the butt didn't help supplement their lesson. Sept well you SHOULD know, because so many people have said so here today. I thought it was always wrong too this morning, but then I got a bunch of different point of views, and now I understand that even it has a time and a place.

Also I have to also say that I think it's weird that you're having a conversation with me about "hitting" now, but when it came up between us before you were just like "kbai. nofriends."

Profitable Gekko

Sebvonna
My mum spanked me as a child. She did it rarely, but when she did I couldn't sit for a week. She didn't do me any favors, all she did was traumatize me.

Children understand way more than we give them credit for. Most parents don't have the patience to talk to a child in a way they can understand, though. Just because it's hard to talk to a child, adults think that children are stupid. Hitting is faster by far. I, however, feel that hitting is an inefficient learning tool compared to an explanation.

Even when a child is told why what they did is wrong before or after a spanking, they might not understand it. Then the child also wouldn't understand why they deserve a spanking. They grow up thinking that's just what you do to bad children is hit them. And not every parent controls how hard or how often they hit their children. This results in child abuse, yaaaaayy! stare
I can relate to this, I was hit a lot as a kid and often it just confused the ******** out of me because I had questions and arguments. I agree that a lot of parents don't treat their kids like people who have minds and can be reasoned with and are very quick to hit them because it stops s**t faster than reasoning with them. But these parents are definitely abusive in comparison to parents who would use spanking as a last resort, and even then without the intention of like beating the kid, like our parents did.

I've learned a lot from this thread, I held the belief that hitting a kid no matter what was ignorant, because there had to be a better way. But if hitting the kid helps them learn a valuable lesson that might otherwise not stick, AND it doesn't cause the kid any issues then I think I'm cool with that, given that the parent didn't jump for that move. It's hard to believe that someone who occasionally hits their kid on the butt after several warnings is causing the kid any mental harm either.

Profitable Gekko

Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91
Visions_of_La
Hizu91


I'm sure you don't know what I've been told my entire life.


Everyone has been told this their entire life. Not directly, but through example and media.
And sometimes it's true.


Not really. The only real difference between the generations now and the ones of the past, aside from maybe the one called The Greatest Generation, is that we have the internet and social media to b***h.
The Boomers looked just as terrible to the generation that probably wanted to collectively off themselves once they realized what they spawned as you do to the boomers, and 13 year olds look to you.
There are many differences between those two generations. The way they were raised and the changing environment does play a part in it.


Between those two, yes.
After that happened though it kind of became a blur and everyone is about the same. At least behavior-wise.
I just think the endless calling everyone younger than us shitty is annoying lol
I agree ;p

Profitable Gekko

freelance lover
Okay- can I just say there's a HUGE difference between spanking and hitting. Spanking is a CONTROLLED punishment that fits the severity of the action in questions. Spanking does not leave marks and it relatively gentle. Hitting comes out of emotions of the parent and is not controlled.

I was spanked growing up, and it was only ever a last resort. When time outs, scolding, etc didn't work my mom would always straight up tell me "If you keep carrying on like this you're going to get a spanking." I had my warning, I knew what the repercussion were. So if I kept misbehaving, my mom was good to her word. It was usually a few swats on the bottom (pants still on), and generally was not very hard. It stung, but it never bruised or left marks aside from a little redness.

So yeah, you can spank and have it be an acceptable punishment. I think a lot of people who are anti-spanking of any kind haven't spent a lot of time working with kids. I don't believe in spanking someone else's child, but when I was doing child care there were a few kids who really could have used a swift spanking. No hitting or beating- that I'm not cool with. But spanking is okay in my book when everything else doesn't work.
I dunno, someone else said they were different too, but when you read the definitions they're the same thing.

Hitting: bring one's hand or a tool or weapon into contact with (someone or something) quickly and forcefully.

Spanking: an act of slapping, especially on the buttocks as a punishment for children.

So spanking is LITERALLY hitting but specifically...on the butt. So no, they seem to be the same thing :Y.
Luna Legend
Mei Fire
Luna Legend
I don't believe in hitting children. Ever. I don't think it teaches them anything besides how to be afraid of you. And it shows them that violence is an acceptable form of discipline, which is a horrible lesson to teach anyone. I don't personally plan to have kids, but if I did, I would never hit them.

I'm curious--if hitting your kid is out of the question, how else will you rear your child from doing wrong?

Talking. Explaining. Using words. I know kids are rambunctious and can be unruly (that's why I don't really want them in the first place), but they're still people. If they're taught from a young age that adults can be respectful and understanding towards them, they'll be less likely to act out. I think a lot of kids feel talked down to and ignored by people older than them, like their feelings don't really matter because they're "just" kids. When really, the things that happen in our childhoods can have a huge impact on how we end up as adults. There are other ways to discipline a child.

A friend was telling me the other day, how her niece knows that if she throws a toy, that toy gets taken away. Her niece is slowly learning not to throw her toys.


What about kids who are developmentally behind? My child is already 2.5 years old, and he still doesn't even know how to say cup to actually mean hey this is a cup gimme something to drink. He is only capable of pointing and making loud noises when he wants something, is hungry, etc. At times, I am left confused because I don't know what he is trying to communicate to me, and it can send him into an angry tantrum or straight tears. Sometimes the toy thing works, etc, but he has all the emotional tantrums of a 2 year old without the ability to communicate or reason with anyone since he is unable to communicate. Basically, he does all the things a two year old does except communicate, draw pictures presented to him, etc. Sometimes he just needs a stern sounding voice and one light tap on the behind. When I say light tap, I really mean a tap that isn't even as hard as playfully "hitting" your friend.

Fuzzy Bibliophile

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User Image I think it all depends on how often the child is being hit and where and the amount of force used.

Like if you just give a smack on the kid's hand that might be okay, but if it's to the point that he or she is getting bruises there might be an issue.

I was smacked as a child and I didn't like it at all. It didn't really help me in any way, seeing as if I so much did something wrong in my mom's eyes I was smacked.

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