Brash Candiboot
(?)Community Member
- Posted: Sat, 08 Nov 2014 19:43:00 +0000
Climbing from the dumpster in which you had hoped to find dinner, the last thing you unstick from your sleeve - thinking it another greasy banana peel - turns out to be an intriguing sheaf of paper (and only a bit greasy, at that). You have found a treasure map, on the back of which is stamped the address to an alchemy store! You tuck the bit of paper in your pocket, to use as kindling later in the ol' barrel fire you and your fellow 99-percenters huddle around.
Or, maybe you WOULD have tucked the map in your pocket, except you don't have pockets! You hardly have clothes! The map falls through the space in your shirt where a pocket would have been and a hungry rat promptly makes a go for the burger grease that had soaked much of the paper. The map was probably a scam, anyway, something the shop owner sold en-masse to dumb hopefuls looking to claw their way from the ruin inflation has made of the economy.
BUT WAIT. That map is no scam, friend. I have in fact hidden BILLIONS OF GOLD below the streets of Gaia, because I had no better place to store it all after the economic bubble figuratively burst. The only problem is, I had a friend do all the heavy-lifting through all the gross parts of the sewer, and he's moved away to college (in like, EUROPE!!) So, after reading a lot of Huffington Post articles on why hoarding economic resources is basically a bad idea for everyone involved, I have decided to open my gold reserves to the public.
You're going to have to do all the heavy lifting yourself, though.
Or, maybe you WOULD have tucked the map in your pocket, except you don't have pockets! You hardly have clothes! The map falls through the space in your shirt where a pocket would have been and a hungry rat promptly makes a go for the burger grease that had soaked much of the paper. The map was probably a scam, anyway, something the shop owner sold en-masse to dumb hopefuls looking to claw their way from the ruin inflation has made of the economy.
BUT WAIT. That map is no scam, friend. I have in fact hidden BILLIONS OF GOLD below the streets of Gaia, because I had no better place to store it all after the economic bubble figuratively burst. The only problem is, I had a friend do all the heavy-lifting through all the gross parts of the sewer, and he's moved away to college (in like, EUROPE!!) So, after reading a lot of Huffington Post articles on why hoarding economic resources is basically a bad idea for everyone involved, I have decided to open my gold reserves to the public.
You're going to have to do all the heavy lifting yourself, though.