Sex Drives

[xOo-Link-oOx]

For starters, I'm a girl and I'm in a relationship with a girl.
I love her and she loves me and everything is all grand. But when we became sexually active with one another I noticed something that doesn't really bother her at all... yet. But it bothers me a lot. We've talked about it of course, but she doesn't seem that worried.

Anyway, her sex drive is REALLY high. Like, I guess she is just so attracted to me that even just touching her in a non-sexual way turns her on. It's insane. And me, I've got a really low sex drive, not sure how or when exactly it happened but it happened and it's frustrating that we're on opposite specturms with this while everything else we have in common and I've never had such a great connection with anyone else.

It always bothers me most when she just tries to hard and can't turn me on, or when she does stuff on webcam (idk why she likes to so much) and it's more enjoyable for her than me. I'll be sitting there thinking about other things but trying to keep my attention on her.

I've thought about if maybe I'm straight and that's why, but I don't get turned on by men either and I can't even fall for them emotionally like I do a woman. I prefer woman and I do like pleasuring my girlfriend that's totally fun, but when it comes to me it's just, nothing.

The hell's wrong with me? D;

[xOo-Link-oOx]

yum_puddi

[geminikitten]

Were you always like this?

If so, that's just the way you are. Nothing is wrong with you. There's only an issue that you can't get into it like you used to in such a dramatic way that it isn't related to you not being infatuated with her anymore. These are often attributed to stresses, hormones and so on.

I don't see much of a problem if that's how you always were, you're willing to please her and try to keep up with her high sex drive while she isn't bothered too much about it.

[xOo-Link-oOx]

geminikitten

Were you always like this?

If so, that's just the way you are. Nothing is wrong with you. There's only an issue that you can't get into it like you used to in such a dramatic way that it isn't related to you not being infatuated with her anymore. These are often attributed to stresses, hormones and so on.

I don't see much of a problem if that's how you always were, you're willing to please her and try to keep up with her high sex drive while she isn't bothered too much about it.

It's not how I always was, I remember when I was around 16 I was better..
So at some point.. I guess my sex drive just died. I also thought it could be stress, but I'm taking a break from school and just doing everything that isn't stressful, yet I'm still like this. sweatdrop

[xOo-Link-oOx]

yum_puddi

[geminikitten]

Most likely that's how you are. My partner's just like you while I'm like your girlfriend. There's nothing wrong with you. It's only really a concern if she starts not being content with the situation. Keep that communication open.

[xOo-Link-oOx]

Errg.. alright, thank you.

[m i r a c u l u m]

There is nothing wrong with you, you simply have a lower sex drive. My only recommendations are that you go to a doctor to make sure there is nothing wrong with your hormones and to talk this over with your girlfriend - if you aren't comfortable, she needs to know, regardless how awkward the conversation may seem.

[Tsundere Succubus]

Not going to lie...I thought to myself "What the hell is wrong with this guy." when you said you thought about other things while her being on webcam.

Man...O_O

[Willow_T]

I don't think it's normal, you're stressed/depressed/or perhaps you're really straight.

[pielord90]

I have a similar issue with my GF. It takes alot to get her into the bed with me but she don't seem like she's enjoyin it at all. We have tried different positions and still nothing.

[klebold2]

Would have believed you if you put more depth in your background, rather than incoherent ranting followed by a question only asked by those who are truly seeking help: "what's wrong with me".

[alfred baramender]

Sounds to me that you just have a low sex drive at the moment. And if it's really that drastic of low sex drive, maybe you're more homoromantic than homosexual?

As in, you're emotionally and romantically attracted to women, but less sexually attracted?

I kind of know how you feel, my girlfriend has a pretty high sex drive and loves sex, and we have sex regularly, but I feel that she's more excited and eager to do it than I am a lot of the time. I think partially it's because she's making up for her years as a pretty conservative straightedge christian girl (huehuheue) and now is just really eager for lots of gay touchies; and partially because I've had a fairly low sex drive for this half of the year and because I get sex now, because I KNOW I'm going to get sex and because we have very scheduled sex, I just kind of expect it without really getting super excited. Sometimes I feel bad because I can't match the stamina that she gets!! I mean we have a pretty good sex life, but I just wish my drive was higher at the moment so I could match her.


I think you're totally fine, just in a spat of a low drive. I guess you should talk to your gf and just ask her to idk slow down a bit because you cant really keep up? Get her to pleasure herself more instead of getting you to do it so you can relax, and tell her you prefer to top anyway? Maybe switch things up, try new things and be more spontaneous? More foreplay?

Make sure to tell her it hasn't got anything to do with her, that youre still attracted to her (assuming you still are) and that it's just you!

[Apatheticwanderer]

Just tell her to slow down some?
I have an extremely high sex drive, whereas my boyfriend doesn't.
When he's not in the mood he just says so and I find something else to do.
It's really that simple.

[xOo-Link-oOx]

m i r a c u l u m

I guess the doctor is a good idea. I've already talked to her about it multiple times when it has come up it just doesn't get us anywhere but me feeling bad for being how I am and her thinking I'll miraculously gain a sex drive one day. sweatdrop

Willow_T

I have no interest in men. I suppose depression could be a possibility.

klebold

Thank you for your completely useless and unhelpful post, and I apologize your mind cannot comprehend my babbling.

alfred baramender

I had never heard of homoromantic. This... sounds like a good possibility if I really have nothing wrong with me. Thank you for mentioning it.
Do homoromantics still enjoy pleasuring their significant other? I still like that because I like to make her feel good, but then I just want to stop after.

Also I do know when sex is definitely going to happen because our meetings tend to be schedules, so perhaps like you I also don't get excited because I expect it.. and when she does webcam stuff I kind of know it's coming as well so I try way ahead of when it happens to try to avoid it in a polite way but it usually doesn't work so I let it happen 'cause I know she's having fun.

Mann, your post was the most helpful post yet. Thank you.

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Thank you to everyone's posts so far.