My dreams and nightmares alike are confusing to me.
I don't seem to perceive them the same way a lot of others do. They are always fuzzy and haywire. I doubt I could ever lucid dream as I seem to have absolutely no control or sentient thought while they progress. It is as though, when I wake up, I am remembering a movie I just watched; not exactly like that, but something similar.
As for the subject of nightmares, I don't even know what to say about them. It's like my mind continually drudges up more and more deranged and psychotic bullshit to keep up with my ever increasing jadedness at the thought of fear. What woke me up feeling strange and not quite right some months ago, for instance, is just another passing thought and not bothersome now.
The last thing that ever bothered me the slightest bit in a nightmare was dreaming I was on the streets by the house of an old friend of mine, and for whatever reason I brought myself up on his secondary porch. When I got there, my perspective shifted to a most unappealing image of my cat, missing all of its body but the head, its frontal chest, and front legs, pinned to a board by a knife, its legs still active and pawing/scratching at the board erratically for some kind of escape or release. As if my mind itself was trying to lull me into this horrible image from a sense of general apathy and calmness. The only thing that actually disturbed me about it was the fact that that disgusting s**t was actually a product of my own mind, so I scolded myself and went back to sleep.
I have only one true fear in the world. It is irrational and completely unfounded. The sound of a silent room, broken only by the ever present, ever quiet sound of flowing air. It induces feelings of paranoia and sometimes even hysteria in me, making me feel like I should be ready to turn and swing at any moment, and to this day I still have no idea why. It is worse than any challenge I could face, any image or thought my mind could conjure up, and even the real, sometimes terrible experiences through which I've been.
Being secluded in the sound of maddening silence is my personal nightmare.