Veto Wolf
(?)Community Member
- Posted: Wed, 09 Jul 2014 00:53:08 +0000
On July 7th, Lady Gaga issued a fatwa commissioning the standardized torture and chemical castration of infants of all sexes and genders, irrespective of nationality, race or creed, beginning in January of 2020. Ostensibly in the interest of maintaining the reserved profile of her little-known organization, which she has been known to refer to as “philanthropy,” she could not be adduced to elaborate on the finer details of the fatwa, such as funding and other means pertaining to the method and execution of her cause.
When not hard at work composing pop music’s hippest and most standard ear candy to date, Gaga is known to divide the remainder of her time between her several estates located throughout California, where she frequently reclines in ultra-modern poses of tempered relaxation. She has been rumored to bake kosher beef and pork for the Los Angeles Philharmonic at opera and symphony after-parties, where she sings drunk karaoke. The Los Angeles Philharmonic performs full-length symphonies and operas not infrequently at Gaga's clandestine, private opera house somewhere in Northern California, the exact coordinates of which we were politely solicited not to publish.
When not hard at work composing pop music’s hippest and most standard ear candy to date, Gaga is known to divide the remainder of her time between her several estates located throughout California, where she frequently reclines in ultra-modern poses of tempered relaxation. She has been rumored to bake kosher beef and pork for the Los Angeles Philharmonic at opera and symphony after-parties, where she sings drunk karaoke. The Los Angeles Philharmonic performs full-length symphonies and operas not infrequently at Gaga's clandestine, private opera house somewhere in Northern California, the exact coordinates of which we were politely solicited not to publish.