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Don't let life get you down, pin it to the floor and knee it in the balls repeatedly until it begs you for mercy.
If life throws a rock at you, throw two rocks at it and then force-feed it uranium.
If life annoys you, stare maniacally into its face and say, "I screwed your wife."
If life upsets you, reroute every water tap in its house to a tank full of liquid nitrogen.
Live life with confidence and determination, never let anything get you down.
Spinal Column
When confronted with a rubix cube rather than try to solve it it is always more enjoyable to switch two of the stickers around, thereby rendering it unsolvable, and giving it to a friend saying, "You're so much better at these things than I am. You have a go." Then sit back and watch it slowly drive them insane.
Eventualy they reach the end of their patience and either smash it to a billion peices or cheat. Regardless of the outcome, whether they're laughing maniacally at the rubix cube as it lies in peices on the floor, or they stand before you with a solved rubix cube and a smug expression soon to be wiped from their cheating little face; its always so satisfying to tell them that all their hard work and mental torment was pointless ... -ly hilarious.
Eventualy they reach the end of their patience and either smash it to a billion peices or cheat. Regardless of the outcome, whether they're laughing maniacally at the rubix cube as it lies in peices on the floor, or they stand before you with a solved rubix cube and a smug expression soon to be wiped from their cheating little face; its always so satisfying to tell them that all their hard work and mental torment was pointless ... -ly hilarious.
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