With another loud belch, Harold took off his jacket. The thought of Harold's nude body made Harry scream. At this Harold said, "No, no, I ain't bein' all deh gay stuff on ya!" as he produced an almost inconcieveably large bazooka from his jacket, "We'z gonna blow dem suckers right up!" Upon hearing Harold's plan Harry frowned and asked, "If I don't have hands, how am I supposed to shoot rockets at Disney?" "Tis simple," Harold explained, "You just borrow mine!" Then Harold proceded to cut off his hands with a rusty bean can. Harold then began to bleed out at an extreme rate. At the sight of his massive blood loss, Harold began to run around screaming, flailing his arms as he went, "Oh dem Disney boys ave dun me in dis time!"
Harold then proceded to tell Harry a story, "I wernt always dis way," Harold began in a drunken slur, "I elly did used to be teh King o' dis here forest! O'course t'was a simplr time, when drunken ideriots could be teh King!" This brought a tear to Harry's eye. Harry had a sudden urge to restore Harold to his former glory. "Harold," Harry asked, "How did you get this way?" Harold told Harry the story, "Them thar Disneys peoples came in and stole the kingdom, all o' the kingdom, not just a wee bit o'it! They forced me to sign da land o'er to them, an den copyrighted mah story, so I culdn't tell no one!" Your turn!
Once upon a time there was a deer named Harry. One day Harry was trying to climb a tree when a turtle walked out of a nearby bush. "What are you doing?" the turtle asked Harry. Harry replied, "I'm trying the climb this tree, here!" The turtle watched as Harry flailed his deer feet. Finally after several minutes the turtle told Harry, "I don't think you're going to be able to climb that tree without hands." You continue the story!
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