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My name is sahara mystique. im the twin sister of London_mystique. if you wanna be friends, PM me first or i'll put you to my Ignored list.>Be nice to your kids, they'll choose your nursing home.
>If you ever heard this story before, dont stop me- i'd like to hear it again.
>sure the early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
>It's not how you fish, it's how you wiggle your worm.
>some call it sushi - i call it bait!
>the second day of a diet is always easier than the first - by the second day, you're off it.
>I thought Martha everything she knows.
>have you had your Elvis sighting today?
>hand over the chocolate and nobody gets hurt!
>I still miss my ex- but my aim's getting better.
>therapy is expensive. Rubber stamps are cheap. you choose.
>be naughty, save santa the trip.
>i used up all my sick days. I'll call in dead!
>the journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
>If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished.
>if things get any worse, i'll have to ask you to stop helping me.
>Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.
> If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
> If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
> Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
> Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
> Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
>I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
> Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
> Death is hereditary.
> There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.
> Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
> When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
> Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
> Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
> Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
> If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
> Where there's a will, there are five hundred relatives.
> Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
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