Everyday I wake up wishing that this is all a fantasy, that everything is made up and unreal and dreamed. Everyday I wake up hoping to find a script to rehearse; hoping this life turns into a movie where everything is perfectly played out, and your success depends on how well you perform your lines; how well you perform your lies. I find myself wishing for someone to write out what I'm suppose to say, and how I'm supposed to end up in these situations, and handle them completely perfectly. I find myself wishing that I can simply get by pretending.
I can't wait for the day I realize that I am my own author, that I can write my own story. I can have all the confidence in the world, all it takes is will power...I always seem to be lacking when it comes to reliance in myself.
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