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Report | 10/05/2023 10:36 pm

Ducky Zilla

We are doing well, I've been struggling mentally but nothing super serious. I've just been exhausted and not spending a lot of time online.
I hope your surgery went well! You're definitely in my thoughts a lot, even if I'm not online and I apologize for not getting on here sooner/replying sooner. I love you girl.

Report | 05/31/2023 6:26 pm

Ducky Zilla

Ah, you had mentioned the infections and puss, and the fact that you had to stop taking one of your main medications but not the stone.
It sucks but makes a lot more sense now, it really sucks that you've had to wait for a qualified surgeon to be in your area. D: I am so sorry sweetheart, but at least it's finally coming.

I can't believe that they wouldn't find a way to get someone in sooner for such a severe issue. That's a bit ridiculous. I realize that not everywhere is bad as it is here in the US, but the healthcare system and quality of care has become such a joke as the years go by, just globally in general. It's like they don't care as much about patients as they used to. Like "Hey, if they die waiting for care, that's one less person to worry about right?" Sorry, I firmly believe that state of mind is a big reason my dad isn't with us anymore. They knew he needed a pacemaker or similar device to help his heart work properly, way back last March, and yet they kept screwing around. They had just scheduled his surgery for a pacemaker the Monday before he passed away, and it makes me so damn sour to think that kind of don't give a damn is just accepted.

Report | 05/31/2023 5:41 pm

Ducky Zilla

Now I just gotta figure out a stay at home income. Lol. I've been living on my savings for like 3 months.

Well, that sounds like it's good news. What kind of surgery, if you don't mind my asking? Regardless, I'm hoping it goes fantastically and you can recover quickly. Also, that it helps in your continued recovery and wellness. heart
I know your health has been a life long fight; the entire time I've known you I've hoped for something to give where you can have more good days than bad.

Report | 05/27/2023 10:57 am

Ducky Zilla

C-Section recovery isn't too horrible, it's the tube removal surgery that takes awhile.
I'm still sore and having pain from that, but it's getting better and the swelling is going down a bit. I'm only up about 7lbs from pre-pregnancy weight. And I'm back in my Wranglers and bodysuits, so it's not horrible.

I'll be sure to give her cuddles for you, too. <3
It's been stressful, but nice that everything is just kind of working out, yes.
How have you been my dear?

Report | 05/18/2023 5:38 pm

Ducky Zilla

It's been over a month and I wanted to give you an update! heart

First off, I miss you, love you, and hope you're doing well my sweets.
Secondly, I had my c-section and a radical tube removal on the 3rd.
Little miss Amelia Lynn was born at 12:41pm on May 3rd, weighing in at 7lbs 11oz.
She's doing fantastic, I'm doing well. In a lot of pain and discomfort but healing faster and better than expected, due to multiple large fibroids caused by a very painful and displaced pregnancy.

I can't remember if I told you, but we purchased the two bedroom trailer.
It's in my name due to a few things he has to take care of still on his own personal stuff. (mostly dealing with his ex)
We'll be moving in within the next few weeks. emotion_kirakira

Report | 03/16/2023 4:38 pm

Ducky Zilla

Well, I have to be extremely careful about how I go about it. I do technically qualify for partial unemployment.
But because of how much I made last year, my weekly payments will be between 3-400$. That's fantastic, right?
Except in order to have my insurance and food aid, I have to be below $1400 for the month.
I'm trying to figure that out, I have to be the only person ever who doesn't want their full unemployment benefits, lmao.

She's due May 7th. I'll be getting a C-section so anywhere between the 1st to the 7th, the doctor hasn't 100% set anything for the surgeries yet.

Report | 03/15/2023 7:42 pm

Ducky Zilla

I gotta figure out income, but otherwise I definitely feel a lot better knowing I don't have to worry about the doctor's and hospital bills.

The Ultrasound went well, she's looking good and measuring correctly. Good movement. I don't seem to have hurt anything major other than my butt. lol

Report | 03/15/2023 7:52 am

Ducky Zilla

I've honestly been most worried about baby, but I think we're okay. I have an appointment and ultrasound this morning, so I'm going to have them double check what they can.
I'm pretty muscular, I think I just bruised my tailbone. lol Things hurt so much more the last year or so when I fall.
Get in shape they say, build muscle they say. Psh, I don't remember my padding bruising this easily. rofl

Well, yes and no? I haven't experienced any of the "weird" ones in any of my pregnancies. And I'm not sure I'd call it cravings, more my actually having an appetite again.
I haven't had an actual appetite or desire for specific... anything... since I had my Gallbladder taken out.
My thing has been snack cakes and AppleJacks cereal. Lmao. My boyfriend says I'm making him fat, he's had more snacks in the last month than he's had the entire time we've been together.

Oh, some good news. Ish. I've gotta figure out some supplementary income for the new few months yet but I did get approved for Medicaid (healthcare) and partial SNAP (Food assistance) since I've had such a sudden drop in income and my doctor's office actually won't even accept my insurance. This is a huge relief. I've been trying to figure out how, even if the office took my insurance, I was going to pay for the actual delivery and getting my tubes tied because my insurance doesn't cover that.

Report | 03/14/2023 6:32 pm

Ducky Zilla

I'm sorry sweetie, it's just never-ending, isn't it?
But hopefully the suffering pays off and you get some relief. I honestly hope that for you.

It's going. I'm just stressed out and trying to fight depression from the unknown and all of the worries weighing on me.
I fell on my tailbone yesterday and couldn't walk for about 12 hours. I'm still staggering around but it's getting better, and I'm still feeling normal movement so she appears to be okay too.

Report | 03/14/2023 1:11 am

Ducky Zilla

I definitely think that's the best idea for the time being.

How are you doing today?

Report | 03/13/2023 6:01 am

Ducky Zilla

I'm definitely thinking hormones have a big part in it, as well.
That's good, I'm glad to hear that sweetheart.
Of course. Ily. heart

Report | 03/10/2023 10:19 am

Ducky Zilla

I can imagine. I can't even fathom telling someone something like that, or being told something like that.
Keep your head up sweetheart. I wish I could do more to help than just talking to you on Gaia.
I obviously don't know her, and can't speak for her, but from experience... Maybe it's hormones? Or someone in her life influencing this decision?
It pains me to say this, but I think not pushing it is the best option. In time I hope that she'll come around and see that she needs you.
We, the human race, do not always make the most logical decisions. But telling you was at least a sign of humility, and a sign that she does care about you in some way.

Report | 03/09/2023 12:49 pm

Ducky Zilla

OMG. That's...
I am so sorry she's being like that. *hugs* You not having kids can be an amazing thing as a friend...
There's no competition between your and their kids. And you don't have to worry about them not getting along.
There's no "I'm the better parent" drama.
You're going to love and spoil them more BECAUSE you don't have your own.
You have more time not having kids, to spend with them and theirs.
Plus, I think you'd make a fantastic friend auntie. Like... Amazing, actually.

I really don't know what else to say. I wish you were here so I could give you a huge hug and make you something sweet to eat.

Report | 02/24/2023 2:52 pm

Ducky Zilla

That's good, though. You're doing better than me right now.
I have so little energy right now that my "meal prep" is living out of a pizza box when there's deals and making sure the freezer and cupboard has stuff in it I can nuke in 3 minutes or less.
Standing hurts so bad. I've almost blacked out a couple of times, and no one seems all that concerned.
I'm actually not gaining weight, so... I'm just trying to make it as easy as I can. I honestly really hate it because I love to cook, and I love balanced meals.

Report | 02/19/2023 4:27 pm

Ducky Zilla

We're pretty much in the same boat. I still eat fairly healthy where I can, but not as healthy as I would like to.

Report | 02/19/2023 3:37 pm

Ducky Zilla

I don't know about over there, but the price of everything is outrageous right now. Groceries have doubled in the last 6 months.
It's just insanity.
They're 10 and 14, they're doing okay I suppose.

Report | 02/18/2023 6:47 pm

Ducky Zilla

Yeah, I'm due in May. Lol. So we'll have a newborn and be trying to move.
But it's better than having no options at all. The housing market isn't exactly open right now.
And we want a house, not an apartment. Especially since I have plans for a stay at home gig that requires a little bit of storage space.

Report | 02/18/2023 6:26 pm

Ducky Zilla

We're doing our best. I'm good at budgeting thankfully. So I'm not completely sunk.
But it'll be an uphill climb. Good news is we may have a two bedroom, bad news is we can't move until June because that's when she's moving.
A co-worker has offered to sell us her two bedroom trailer house (not exactly ideal but it's a home) because she's moving back to Tennessee to take care of her mama.
And it's an older trailer but she's been renovating it, and it already has a lot, etc. So it's a good start.

Report | 02/18/2023 5:43 pm

Ducky Zilla

I definitely don't suggest having kids when you're in your 30's. rofl

I'm happy but we're just trying to figure out how to make it work. We weren't exactly planning or expecting this.
So we've gotta find a bigger place, and I'm further along than we thought so I'm on heavy weight restrictions about 6 weeks earlier than we expected.
That means my income is about to drop drastically.

Kids are definitely a life experience I wouldn't change or give up in a million years.

Report | 02/15/2023 5:39 pm

Ducky Zilla

I 100% just realized I never answered you. gonk

I'm not teeny tiny, but my body build and dress size is at about 130lbs. I have a lot of muscle. But I'm definitely not a big girl.
But I'm apparently at 28 weeks, we're having a girl. Just one. I'm just further along than I thought.

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