This was posted in the Ahlaevor by me, and I finally decided to transfer it here.
All right conformist society...you asked for it.
In recent events, we have come across this holiday. Easter. The holiday where we find the symbols to be a rabbit and an egg. Don't ask about the pictures that brings to mind, but what the ******** do they have to do with Jesus?? I would like that answer. What do the bloody rabbit and egg have to do with Jesus dying and coming back, which is supposed to be the theme of Easter. You want to hear what I think. Well too bad if you don't, because I am going to type it anyways!
I think that people invented Easter to make up for the mistake they made with Christmas, because like hell was Jesus born in the middle of a bloody snowstorm everybody. Any smartass whoop knows that Jesus was born in the fleckin' spring. So I believe that Easter was invented by the morons who could just NOT admit that they were wrong and they made some other holiday just to make conformist society happy and the candy companies rich.
And don't get me started on Valentines Day. Singles awareness my a**. The only thing I am aware of on Valentines Day is that I am supposed to spend money on these dupy cards to give to my friends and get high off of whatever crackfest they have been on that made the world all red, pink and white. Have you ever seen that fat baby walkin' around and shooting people with arrows? I think not!
Okay, we will try to finish this before I get really ticked and start ripping apart the little egg that my neice made me...which is actually quite cute....but that isn't the point of my anger.
Now that we have started this, I guess I will go with each holiday that my creepy family gets together for every single year without fail. I walk away from those experiences usually with a sore back, a stomachache, and my cheeks hurting from all the BS smiling I do. My god. I believe that families were invented just to show you the millions of reasons that you need to move out and get your own life. And I remember just why I am here on my own, starving to death, freezing and without electricity in the middle of winter, then dying of heat and struggling to pay bills for the AC in the summer. My Aunt Petunia's barbeque salad. Gehh...get me a mountain of chinese cure-all and I will drink the whole thing before I will eat that s**t willingly.
First of the year comes New Years. The only holiday I like. The holiday where my family gets together, most of them get wasted on booze, and I take off with my friends to go downtown and flirt with other wasted boozers. Yes. America is a great country, full of fat-a** retards who think money is the only thing that matters in the world. (no offense to Moshi, Shiva, Rain, Saya, or any of you other poor losers who are like me and hate how people think being rich isn't all that great of a goal)
Then next comes Valentines Day...which I have already touched on, and my family has a get together for that as well....where Auntie Rum comes down...and yeah...if she kisses me one more time, I am going to throw something at the nearest smelly dog she has with her. I got bit by that stupid thing, and it's the ugliest, meanest, smelliest, dirtiest animal I have ever seen. I'll be damned if I am sorry the day that thing finally passes away. Lucky my a**.
But that holiday is already ranted about, and may I remind my readers that I despise the color pink even more than Mika does. Gehh...nasty crap I must say. Girls color...bah.
Then comes the next holiday celebrated in my home. St. Patricks Day. The day where my cousins find it hilarious to pinch people. Do I look like the Poppin' Fresh biscuit? The last person to pinch me got a broken nose and a misplaced femur. I am not very enthusiastic about celebrations that center around pain through the younger people, and seem to degenerate as time goes on. This kid I went to high school with saw that I wasn't wearing green and pinched my a**...I don't think he is going to have children. St. Patricks Day I can understand the meaning of, and I enjoy watching, once again, the boozers walking around downtown. Yup. God I love Utah sometimes. Home of the Mormons and the best Boozers around.
Then comes Easter....we've gone over that...and half my rant was dismantled by a smart person. *stares pointedly at* So we will go to the next one.
*sighs* We don't have a holiday other than the one in May, and if I rant about that one, many will find out about my mother, which anyone can do if they look in the porn section of any XXX video section. Yes everyone...my mother is a porn star and a stripper in a night club. Thank you VERY much...let's move on.
The next family get together is a family reunion in June, then we come to the Fourth of July. Yes America, we know you are free and addicted to big shiny things that go boom. Whatever...and screw you. All I know is that once again, more boozers, except now, they have explosives. Woot! The intelligence of some people. Give a drunk something to blow himself up with. Great idea! Then pioneer day....gehh.....just forget that one and boot it out the window with the rest of the boneheaded ideas.
Moving on.......August is clear. (thank God) and also my birthday. Seven days after Mika K., and one year older. Mwahaha. Booyah! Take that Mika!
All right.....September is beginning of school for the suckers that didn't graduate. Hah. October...Halloween..... ...No comment. November...Thanksgiving...the holiday without thanks anywhere in it. December...Christmas...the holiday that started as a good thing, but then got Christianized and screwed over like the rest of our holidays.
Well, well...I am losing my steam and getting irritable at anything that moves, so I will go now to brainless RPing, and hopefully sleep at some point this evening.
--Kenya Yen--Doc Commons--Sputnick--Laura Rogers--
Forever-Times · Tue Apr 18, 2006 @ 05:57am · 0 Comments |