Here I will mainly discuss friendships, but most of what I say applies to romantic relationships as well--especially as I see them as a specific sort of friendship.
Any friendship requires give and take: you get out what you put in, more or less. You can view them as contractual, if you want ("You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours" wink . There are a lot of bonuses to a friendship: someone to talk to, someone to play games with, someone to hang out with, etc. But you have to give back. You have to be someone to talk to, be someone to play games with, and be someone to hang out with. You can't just take what you want from it. Friendships require effort on your part, too.
So why bother? Friendships are restrictive. I gave my friend a ride home from work the other day when I could have spent that time doing something I wanted to do! Well, in a sense, I'm right. Friendships do come with restrictions. You may end up giving your friend a ride to work, lending an ear when they need it, work hard at trying to cheer a friend up, give advice, or not be able to make your own plans this weekend because dammit, you're supposed to go to a friend's wedding.
So, yes. Friendships come with so-called "restrictions." But think back to that time when you were 8, and you wanted that candy bar in the store. It was a dollar, and you only had 50 cents. Well, your best friend was there and had 50 cents, too. So you bought the candy bar together and split it. Sure, you had to share half of it with your friend, but without your friend, you wouldn't have had any at all. By working together you were able to progress farther than either one of you working alone.
So some might say that friendships are stifling or restrictive. But how far can you get without them? You won't have a shoulder to cry on, or a friendly face to hang around. You won't have a buddy for that trip to Europe you've been wanting to take. Without friendships, you miss out on a lot. There are a lot of benefits that you no longer have. Without friends you would be restricting yourself far more, in my opinion, than with friends.
So what's it gonna be? Personally, I have a friendship I need to work on. So while you're making your decision, I'll be patching up a friendship I almost broke. Later!
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