What the hell was God thinking when He made you?!?!

[Sol Lunarena]

".....GOD I wish I could be suicidal."  

[Kalathma]

"Wait... Where's the morality in this thing?!" xd I'm told I'm 'heartless.'

I'll take the Flying Spaghetti Monster, thanks. rofl

 

[Peppermint Schnapps]

during:
he/she/it wasn't feeling very creative. i'm told i look just like my mom. xP

afterwards:
*talking to earth* "lol, sorry guys, my bad."  

[Hollic]

I believe God was getting shitfaced with his friends, and we're the result of his divine vomit o_o;


"LOL LOOK IT MOVES"  

[Sunegami]

What was God thinking when he created me?

"That Steve kid is pretty weird; he needs someone who can match him."

"that Steve kid" is now my boyfriend of over 5 years, and I have no end of fun annoying the s**t out of him. heart whee  

[Tsamikayu]

I think God was trying to think of how much he could get things wrong when he made me, then when I got through it, he figured 'Eh, it'll never last' and wandered off somewhere.  

[The Velveteen Violinist]

After making me:

Jesus: Father, where's the off switch on this thing????  

[crystal_pepzi]

God looked down upon my un-wed copulating parents and said
"PWNED!!!!!111!!LOL!!!!"

Thus crystal_pepzi was created...  

[silver_m00n_beam]

"Hmmm... we need more of the female type on this god-forsaken planet, but I appear to have run out of 'sugar, spice, and everything nice', ah, ******** it. She can love frogs."

Later-

"Damn, what the hell? I should have just waited for the next shipment of decency."  

[EmoKittie999]

"Let's see... Big head? Check. Lack of hair? Check. Fast-acting hormones? Check. Abnormally large I.Q.? Check. This one's gonna be interesting..."

Puberty time!

"What was I thinking? She swears, she curses, she doesn't even follow me anymore! I gave her such pretty hair, and she went and dyed it! And, hey! When I gave her fast-acting hormones, I didn't mean I wanted her to have C-cups at twelve! Aaagh! gonk "

Okay, so, I included his thoughts from another stage in my development. Sue me. XD  

[Koneko Shai]

Three words dear friends...

DUCK

BILLED

PLATYPUS.  

[Gestapo de Capo]

Before:
"Hmm... one big heart, unique personality, some sugar, a bit of spice, some pixies... maybe a bible in there too. Presto. She is my rival! Ingenious!"

After:
"Oh... ********, I knew I should have taken Home Ec. in high school...errr... miscalculated there. Big Heart = NOT SUPPOSED TO BE BIG ENOUGH FOR BOTH GENDERS TO GET A PART OF...where's the Plan B when you need it?"  

[20 Shades of Crazy]

"Let's see, Einstein told me this kind moves.

Opinionated? Check.
Literature nerd-um? Check.
Half a teaspoon of maturity? Check.
...Another spoon full of literature nerd? Check.
Creativity? Check.
...Five overdoses of creativity?
Err...check?"

"Holy s**t, I made a writer."  

[October Cross]

"I suppose I should get down to business about those dirty Americans butchering the English language. Let me find my dictionary and cram it in this thing's head."

Afterward:

"Oh man. I used the fat kid goop on a skinny kid. This could cause some problems..."