I wore cologne to get the feeling right
we started making out and she took off my pants
but then I turned on the TV

And that's about the time that she walked away from me
nobody likes you when you're 23
and are still more amused by TV shows
what the hell is a.d.d.?
my friends say I should act my age
what's my age again?
what's my age again?

Then later on, on the drive home
I called her mom from a pay phone
I said I was the cops
and your husband's in jail
this state looks down on sodomy