"You don't have to be sad alone you know? I've always been here for you and I'll continue to always be here for you, you just need to let me in - this cold war between us has to stop. I know you're hurt, but I'm hurt too, we have to fight together and not separately if we are going to make it through this." as he spoke his blue eyes narrowed on her dark figure, she was so mysterious to him even now after all this time. He could close his eyes and see her perfectly even when she was not near him, even when the seas stood between everything they built. The lion had met his dark beauty on a rainy day, when the sky was covered in dark and heavy clouds, that day Mono seemed to brighten the sky, illuminating everything around her.
She was his fallen star.
There could be no mistaking the love he had for her, he would have followed her to the ends of the earth if she had ever asked, though he knew she never would. She wasn't like that, she was never needy and she never asked for much. The last time they spoke about wants or desires she simply asked him to stay. He knew after all their long talks that some part of her was still stuck in the past, in a dark place that she kept all to herself. Still though, he would try every day to remind her that she wasn't alone and that no matter how hard things got he would always be by her side.
They had traveled for a long time together, sometimes going weeks without really saying much, though this wasn't very surprising, they could find solace in words unspoken - the silence didn't scare them. The large male shifted his weight as he stepped to stand behind the dark lioness, craving her affection was something that came so naturally to him, the colorful lion always longed to have her close.
She was his muse.
"I know-" Mono replied with a soft sigh as amber colored eyes closed as the lioness looked away, drifting off into the distance. Maybe shame was a hard thing for her to admit or face, but she felt like a failure, even now - this was a feeling that she had a hard time expressing. Lately things felt a little rough between between the two, losing cubs together would do this to any couple, she was fully aware of the consequences of loss, it was just hard to accept that could happen to them .. that it did happen to them.
"I love you for being here, never forget that. I am sorry I have been emotionally limp, I am trying, I promise."
For the longest time all she could remember was the feeling of being alone, stranded from her family and pride. When she was younger Mono had loved another and this love had left her hollow and weak after it came crashing down on her, falling apart before it ever really started. No matter how faint the flame was, she felt the burn even to this day. It was hard enough growing up in the shadow of five beautiful sisters, Mono had always felt like the ugly-duck and outcast.
Now that the black lioness was older accepting that she was never any of those things felt foreign, it was a challenge, not for lack of trying but for her hesitance to accept a new reality. Mono was so use to feeling this distance between herself and the world, it was a surprise she ever allowed Ciaran in. He had come at such a weird time, it was like he knew that some part of her needed him and so he sought her out, searching the universe until he appeared before her like a specter, a ghost of once was - of what could be. Mono could never bring herself to be without him now though, the two were inseparable.
Mono had fallen into deep self-loathing, it was like misfortune constantly followed her, relentlessly taking and taking until the lioness felt like she had nothing left inside to give. She hoped that with time they would be able to heal together, Mono just didn't know if she was willing to give any more of her time to this sorrow. Slowly the dark lioness turned to face her colorful male counterpart, her amber colored eyes narrowing faintly as she brought her forehead to rest under his chin, nuzzling deeply into the center of his mane. This was her sweet spot, this was her place of peace.
"I know we can get through this . I will be here with you every step of the way. It's just a minor setback, we will have the family we want, we will make it so."
"Are you sure?" the lioness sighed as she allowed all of her weight to rest against her lover, taking in the moment with a faint smile.
"I am sure of it, Mono. What we lost can not be returned... but, we can change our own fate, we can try again and we can allow ourselves to move forward. Are... you willing to do that with me?" Ciaran spoke in a tone that was faint, soft enough for only his mate to hear. In this moment he felt small, yet he stood stoic under the weight of her sadness. He needed to be her solid ground. Now more than ever.
Mono closed her eyes as she allowed her mind to drift off into her safe place beside him, his warmth kept her grounded.
"I am willing to try again if you are. Just, understand that this will be hard, if it happens again..."
"Don't, just try to stay positive." he interjected with a soft frown. Her pain was his pain and for as long as it took... he would be by her side, facing this abyss together.
"On another note-" Mono paused and glanced up at her mate with a frown. "My sister Ico is going to be visiting us soon."
"Ico? Why? I thought she had a Goddess she slaved herself to?"
"I'm not sure, but we should be expecting her soon." the lioness sighed before pulling away. "-Let's go hunt, I need to clear my mind before Ico arrives."
"Mm, alright, love. Let's go."
