Quote:
”Oh, man...nothing like authentic Chinese food,” Kit sighed, hardly waiting for the steam to escape as he pushed back the lid of the styrofoam container in order to dig in. He had snatched up a piece of bok choy with a pair of chopsticks and slipped it into his mouth before considering that his guest might not have appreciated his lack of manners. Thinking again, he removed each of the containers from the plastic bags, opened them up, and set them out to allow Xi-Wang to take what he pleased.
“Sorry about that,” he apologized with a chortle, plucking a plate from his drying rack by the sink to offer the other young man. “That’s what comes of not being used to guests coming over for dinner. I forget my manners.” Once they each had plates and silverware, he grabbed glasses for each of them. “Anything you’d like to drink? Don’t think we got anything from there.”
His gaze passed over the various orders laid on the table and, upon discovering what he had been searching for, snatched up the baked barbeque pork bun. At least he didn’t require too much table etiquette for that. “Oh...hey, if you like, once you’ve filled your plate, come sit on the couch with me. It’s more comfortable and we can talk. Unless,” he was quick to add, “you prefer to finish your dinner first. Or you don’t feel like talking.”
“Sorry about that,” he apologized with a chortle, plucking a plate from his drying rack by the sink to offer the other young man. “That’s what comes of not being used to guests coming over for dinner. I forget my manners.” Once they each had plates and silverware, he grabbed glasses for each of them. “Anything you’d like to drink? Don’t think we got anything from there.”
His gaze passed over the various orders laid on the table and, upon discovering what he had been searching for, snatched up the baked barbeque pork bun. At least he didn’t require too much table etiquette for that. “Oh...hey, if you like, once you’ve filled your plate, come sit on the couch with me. It’s more comfortable and we can talk. Unless,” he was quick to add, “you prefer to finish your dinner first. Or you don’t feel like talking.”
Quote:
Shaking his head, smiling at the other, Xi-wang took the offered plate and went to loading up his own plate with a little bit of everything. “It’s ok. It just means you need to have company over more.” His mother, while growing up, had pounded the idea of manners into his head. He knew most people didn’t have such manners, not to say others were rude, but most hadn’t grown up as strictly as he had either. So he hadn’t been bothered by the other going for the food as Kit had, it was sort of amusing really. The other certainly seemed enthusiastic to be eating.
“Authentic Chinese should be the only Chinese.” At least that was his opinion, but that was because it was better and why eat Chinese food if you didn’t want actual Chinese food? “Mmm...tea, juice...either one is fine.” Reaching for some noodles on his plate, chopsticks held with his fingers, he took a bite and gave an approving sound of pleasure. It was good. Kit had picked a place he’d never ordered from, but he trusted the others judgement in what was good Chinese. That was one thing he’d found out they had in common at the blind date - Chinese food. They both liked the authentic stuff.
“I don’t mind talking and sitting on the couch with you.” Grabbing three little soup dumplings, one thing they’d both agreed to get, he headed over towards the couch to sit himself down on. “I might have grown up with proper table manners but I’ve learned that it isn’t so...normal I think.” Normal didn’t fit what he was thinking, not really, but it worked. Most people his age, and even a lot of people in general, did not have the same manners he’d grown up with or what his mother had. He had learned and adapted and changed, especially since moving out from under her roof.
“Is there anything you want to talk about in particular...or just whatever comes up?” He might as well ask, see if there was anything on the others mind. He was trying to think about the other a bit more, accommodate as much as he could.
“Authentic Chinese should be the only Chinese.” At least that was his opinion, but that was because it was better and why eat Chinese food if you didn’t want actual Chinese food? “Mmm...tea, juice...either one is fine.” Reaching for some noodles on his plate, chopsticks held with his fingers, he took a bite and gave an approving sound of pleasure. It was good. Kit had picked a place he’d never ordered from, but he trusted the others judgement in what was good Chinese. That was one thing he’d found out they had in common at the blind date - Chinese food. They both liked the authentic stuff.
“I don’t mind talking and sitting on the couch with you.” Grabbing three little soup dumplings, one thing they’d both agreed to get, he headed over towards the couch to sit himself down on. “I might have grown up with proper table manners but I’ve learned that it isn’t so...normal I think.” Normal didn’t fit what he was thinking, not really, but it worked. Most people his age, and even a lot of people in general, did not have the same manners he’d grown up with or what his mother had. He had learned and adapted and changed, especially since moving out from under her roof.
“Is there anything you want to talk about in particular...or just whatever comes up?” He might as well ask, see if there was anything on the others mind. He was trying to think about the other a bit more, accommodate as much as he could.
Quote:
”Oh, I’ve had plenty of company over,” Kit answered, laughing. “Just not for dinner. And not recently.” He himself had had parents who claimed that eating standing up was eating ‘like a beggar’ and therefore had always made certain everyone was seated together properly with a multitude of other conditions set for a perfect family meal. Once he’d moved out, though, he hadn’t bothered to exercise a single one unless it suited his fancy.
The comment about authentic Chinese food was met with eager nods until he was able to swallow his mouthful and speak properly again. “That fast food stuff gives people the wrong idea about Chinese cuisine. And then they don’t know what they’re missing out on.” Deciding that juice was faster and easier to prepare, he set down his plate to grab a bottle of lychee juice from the fridge and pour them each a glass, grinning. “Hope you don’t mind this kind. It’s my favorite.”
Upon hearing that Xi-Wang was going to join him, he brought the pair of glasses over and placed them on the low coffee table in front of the couch. Then he went back for his plate loaded with food. “Normal?” Kit repeated once he had settled himself. “Oh, really? I thought it was, but maybe that’s because I was raised in a family of Eastern cultures similar to yours.” The tan teen shrugged. “I think I know what you mean, though. Proper table manners don’t seem like they’re usually practiced by people our age these days. At least not among peers.”
He side-eyed his guest at the inquiry about conversation topics and set down his plate in his lap. “Yeah, actually...I was wondering. Would it be too painful for you to tell me what happened with you and your boyfriend?” A casual hand reached for a glass of juice. “If it’s none of my business, you can definitely say so. I know it’s a pretty personal matter.”
The comment about authentic Chinese food was met with eager nods until he was able to swallow his mouthful and speak properly again. “That fast food stuff gives people the wrong idea about Chinese cuisine. And then they don’t know what they’re missing out on.” Deciding that juice was faster and easier to prepare, he set down his plate to grab a bottle of lychee juice from the fridge and pour them each a glass, grinning. “Hope you don’t mind this kind. It’s my favorite.”
Upon hearing that Xi-Wang was going to join him, he brought the pair of glasses over and placed them on the low coffee table in front of the couch. Then he went back for his plate loaded with food. “Normal?” Kit repeated once he had settled himself. “Oh, really? I thought it was, but maybe that’s because I was raised in a family of Eastern cultures similar to yours.” The tan teen shrugged. “I think I know what you mean, though. Proper table manners don’t seem like they’re usually practiced by people our age these days. At least not among peers.”
He side-eyed his guest at the inquiry about conversation topics and set down his plate in his lap. “Yeah, actually...I was wondering. Would it be too painful for you to tell me what happened with you and your boyfriend?” A casual hand reached for a glass of juice. “If it’s none of my business, you can definitely say so. I know it’s a pretty personal matter.”
Quote:
With the way Kit flirted with him, at least that’s what it seemed like to him at times, and the words he didn’t ask about the company the other had over, but not for dinner. Instead he focused on the others comment on Chinese food and nodded his head. “That and it’s always too greasy and oily for me...I can’t eat it well.” Not that he wanted to, not when he knew where to get good Chinese food and if need be he could cook for himself.
He’d had to learn, without his mother knowing, and he’d done just that. Asking older women at the Chinese restaurants for help, for information, he’d had to unfortunately explain his circumstances to them. They wound up giving him pity filled looks, hugs, and treated him as his mother should have. It was nice but also made him wish his mother could have been more than he was, or rather more than she had become. But it meant he wasn’t about to touch the cheap Chinese food. “I wish more people understood the stuff they get isn’t real Chinese food. It’s far from it - too bland. I learned how to cook proper Chinese food myself.” At least for him the cheap stuff was bland, he was used to heat with his food.
“Mmm, I don’t mind.” Reading over the label with a smile. “You do like foods, and drinks, most don’t go for.” At least most who didn’t grow up around it, at least it seemed that way. His classmates ate the cheap Chinese food...and likely none of them had a clue what a lychee taste like much less looked like. He also was fairly certain they, and bottled juice from them, wasn’t sold in normal markets either.
“Nope, my mother was rather proper about it. She might have given up her culture, and killed it for me, but proper table manners was a thing no matter what.”
Taking a sip from his juice he blinked once before nodding his head. Setting his glass down. “I don’t mind. I’ve already had to explain it a few times to friends...so it’s not too much for me.” Not at this point anyway. It still bothered him but it was getting better. With each time he talked about it the situation got a bit better, easier, to talk about. “I came home with flowers, which I never got to give him, he was silently sitting inthe living room with the lights down low. When I got into the kitchen he started talking. I-I guess I didn’t notice things or ask him about himself enough...get involved enough. He didn’t like that I was out at all on Valentines day - he saw me out.” Saw them at the event. Caleb had misunderstood and even when he’d tried to tell him the truth it hadn’t helped, it might have made it worse even.
“I-I remember him saying I liked to live with all different people. I can’t remember how he worded it but...but it sounded like there was another meaning to it.” And that had hurt - a lot. The up front meaning to those words ahd hurt, like he enjoyed not having a stable home. But the double meaning he was sure was there...that hurt even more. Assuming he was like that...that he was cheap or easy...that hurt a lot. “He gave me a week to move out - I left that night. He was tired of it...that I didn’t try and talk, that I didn’t notice things. I don’t know what I missed...but it’s my fault it all happened. I just guess I ended it that night - I was too wrong.”
He’d had to learn, without his mother knowing, and he’d done just that. Asking older women at the Chinese restaurants for help, for information, he’d had to unfortunately explain his circumstances to them. They wound up giving him pity filled looks, hugs, and treated him as his mother should have. It was nice but also made him wish his mother could have been more than he was, or rather more than she had become. But it meant he wasn’t about to touch the cheap Chinese food. “I wish more people understood the stuff they get isn’t real Chinese food. It’s far from it - too bland. I learned how to cook proper Chinese food myself.” At least for him the cheap stuff was bland, he was used to heat with his food.
“Mmm, I don’t mind.” Reading over the label with a smile. “You do like foods, and drinks, most don’t go for.” At least most who didn’t grow up around it, at least it seemed that way. His classmates ate the cheap Chinese food...and likely none of them had a clue what a lychee taste like much less looked like. He also was fairly certain they, and bottled juice from them, wasn’t sold in normal markets either.
“Nope, my mother was rather proper about it. She might have given up her culture, and killed it for me, but proper table manners was a thing no matter what.”
Taking a sip from his juice he blinked once before nodding his head. Setting his glass down. “I don’t mind. I’ve already had to explain it a few times to friends...so it’s not too much for me.” Not at this point anyway. It still bothered him but it was getting better. With each time he talked about it the situation got a bit better, easier, to talk about. “I came home with flowers, which I never got to give him, he was silently sitting inthe living room with the lights down low. When I got into the kitchen he started talking. I-I guess I didn’t notice things or ask him about himself enough...get involved enough. He didn’t like that I was out at all on Valentines day - he saw me out.” Saw them at the event. Caleb had misunderstood and even when he’d tried to tell him the truth it hadn’t helped, it might have made it worse even.
“I-I remember him saying I liked to live with all different people. I can’t remember how he worded it but...but it sounded like there was another meaning to it.” And that had hurt - a lot. The up front meaning to those words ahd hurt, like he enjoyed not having a stable home. But the double meaning he was sure was there...that hurt even more. Assuming he was like that...that he was cheap or easy...that hurt a lot. “He gave me a week to move out - I left that night. He was tired of it...that I didn’t try and talk, that I didn’t notice things. I don’t know what I missed...but it’s my fault it all happened. I just guess I ended it that night - I was too wrong.”
Quote:
A high whistle communicated that Kit was impressed. “You can cook? That’s amazing. Definitely more useful as life skills than sketching. Maybe I’ll have to see if you’ll let me order something from you some time. Or, if you have the patience to work with a novice, I’d be happy to pay you for lessons to teach me. There’s an Asian market not too far from here where we could get some fresh ingredients.”
The tattooed teen was curious about what Xi-Wang meant when he’d said his mother had given up her culture, but that seemed a topic he could inquire about at a later time if Xi-Wang chose to discuss it. As it was, he was already investigating a matter that was likely none of his business. Unlike the situation regarding his mother’s culture, however, Kit thought he had some experience in this particular sort of problem.
Though Xi-Wang claimed that already having spoken so much about what had occured made it easier to go over again, Kit knew that varied with different people. With some, for example, it became more difficult to discuss with each re-telling, but hopefully, as he had said, Xi-Wang really didn’t mind. Kit’s plate was gradually relieved of its contents as he ate, listening attentively to his friend’s story.
The comment about Valentine’s day evoked an uncomfortable pang of guilt. He disliked the idea that he might have contributed to a such a significant misunderstanding. While it was possible that the same results might have occured if they hadn’t been seen, it was impossible to know for sure now. The damage had been done. Still...that didn’t mean they were beyond hope, did it? Couples often broke up and got back together again. If both parties were willing, that was.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Kit said when the other young man had finished. “But aren’t you shouldering a little too much of the blame?” His food finished, he took a large gulp from his glass and set it back down on the coffee table, turning his full attention to his guest.
The tattooed teen was curious about what Xi-Wang meant when he’d said his mother had given up her culture, but that seemed a topic he could inquire about at a later time if Xi-Wang chose to discuss it. As it was, he was already investigating a matter that was likely none of his business. Unlike the situation regarding his mother’s culture, however, Kit thought he had some experience in this particular sort of problem.
Though Xi-Wang claimed that already having spoken so much about what had occured made it easier to go over again, Kit knew that varied with different people. With some, for example, it became more difficult to discuss with each re-telling, but hopefully, as he had said, Xi-Wang really didn’t mind. Kit’s plate was gradually relieved of its contents as he ate, listening attentively to his friend’s story.
The comment about Valentine’s day evoked an uncomfortable pang of guilt. He disliked the idea that he might have contributed to a such a significant misunderstanding. While it was possible that the same results might have occured if they hadn’t been seen, it was impossible to know for sure now. The damage had been done. Still...that didn’t mean they were beyond hope, did it? Couples often broke up and got back together again. If both parties were willing, that was.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Kit said when the other young man had finished. “But aren’t you shouldering a little too much of the blame?” His food finished, he took a large gulp from his glass and set it back down on the coffee table, turning his full attention to his guest.
Quote:
“I learned...I asked the old grandmothers at some of the Chinese restaurants. They were more than willing to help.” After he spoke to them, explained things to him, with others translating for him because back then his Chinese had been so limited and so bad. He hadn’t been able to talk to them on his own, something he could do now with a fair amount of ease. “Mmm! We could, I mean if you ever want me to cook.” Smiling at the idea. Spending time with a friend and cooking, with or just for them, was appealing to him. It would be a good way to spend time together - doing something they enjoyed.
Looking up from where he had been gathering food with is chopsticks, he took the mouthful and then shook his head. Swallowing he found his voice and gave something of a sigh. “It’s ok...it seems I was messing things up for a while. It was just...the last straw and he was tired of my mistakes. It’s ok...I-I mean if I was at fault then me not being around he can get over what I did and find someone who won’t mess up like I did...he can be happy.” Nodding his head he set his chopsticks down carefully.
“I don’t think so. The only thing Caleb didn’t do was try and start a conversation sooner….to point out what I was doing...or not doing - both really.” He answered while his right hand reached out for his own glass of juice. Taking a slow sip, lingering on purpose, he set the glass down slowly. Half drained the glass sat with him looking at it for several moments.
“I just...I didn’t know what to do I guess. I mean I guess I didn’t know how to do the dating thing and I learned that.” Shrugging a bit. “There were a few things I messed up at.” By now the exact words were forgotten but the message, the misdeeds of his...his mistakes were remembered. He knew where he’d misstepped and what he’d done wrong - what he could fix next time.
Looking up from where he had been gathering food with is chopsticks, he took the mouthful and then shook his head. Swallowing he found his voice and gave something of a sigh. “It’s ok...it seems I was messing things up for a while. It was just...the last straw and he was tired of my mistakes. It’s ok...I-I mean if I was at fault then me not being around he can get over what I did and find someone who won’t mess up like I did...he can be happy.” Nodding his head he set his chopsticks down carefully.
“I don’t think so. The only thing Caleb didn’t do was try and start a conversation sooner….to point out what I was doing...or not doing - both really.” He answered while his right hand reached out for his own glass of juice. Taking a slow sip, lingering on purpose, he set the glass down slowly. Half drained the glass sat with him looking at it for several moments.
“I just...I didn’t know what to do I guess. I mean I guess I didn’t know how to do the dating thing and I learned that.” Shrugging a bit. “There were a few things I messed up at.” By now the exact words were forgotten but the message, the misdeeds of his...his mistakes were remembered. He knew where he’d misstepped and what he’d done wrong - what he could fix next time.
Quote:
”Huh! I’m sure they were happy to have someone who wanted to learn. That’s great that you took the initiative to ask.” His face lit at Xi-Wang’s offer to cook. “I’d love to try your cooking! And to help you cook too, of course, if you don’t think I’d get too much in the way. Always a fan of trying new things and learning from others.”
Gradually growing serious, Kit’s smile faded and he leaned forward to regard the other teen more closely. “I don’t mean to be rude,” he began, “but I think you’re looking at this from something of a one-sided point of view. For example, if he saw you with me at the Valentine’s Day event, I think he should have approached us then to find out what was going on. It sounded like he just assumed what he wanted to.
“Xi-Wang, I don’t mean to put you boyfriend - er, Caleb down, but everyone has flaws of some sort or another. You said the only one you can think of is that he didn’t start a conversation sooner, but it sounds to me that the bigger problem is that he wasn’t willing to communicate or try to listen to you. Otherwise that could have been a misunderstanding that could have easily been cleared up. Still could, in fact.” He tilted his head thoughtfully.
“A flaw you might have, on the other hand, is a bias toward Caleb. If you don’t address or acknowledge things he might have done wrong, like purposefully hurt you, then nothing will get better. I mean sure, you can take on all the blame and say it was your fault, but if you think you were doing your best, then how can anyone ask for more? Faults are a part of who we are, so if someone can’t accept you with your faults included, maybe they don’t deserve you at all.” He flourished a hand. “On the other hand, if you want to improve, you can always try asking for a second chance.”
Resting an elbow on his knee, he made a fist and leaned his chin atop his knuckles. “Say...mind me asking how many relationships you’ve been in before?”
Gradually growing serious, Kit’s smile faded and he leaned forward to regard the other teen more closely. “I don’t mean to be rude,” he began, “but I think you’re looking at this from something of a one-sided point of view. For example, if he saw you with me at the Valentine’s Day event, I think he should have approached us then to find out what was going on. It sounded like he just assumed what he wanted to.
“Xi-Wang, I don’t mean to put you boyfriend - er, Caleb down, but everyone has flaws of some sort or another. You said the only one you can think of is that he didn’t start a conversation sooner, but it sounds to me that the bigger problem is that he wasn’t willing to communicate or try to listen to you. Otherwise that could have been a misunderstanding that could have easily been cleared up. Still could, in fact.” He tilted his head thoughtfully.
“A flaw you might have, on the other hand, is a bias toward Caleb. If you don’t address or acknowledge things he might have done wrong, like purposefully hurt you, then nothing will get better. I mean sure, you can take on all the blame and say it was your fault, but if you think you were doing your best, then how can anyone ask for more? Faults are a part of who we are, so if someone can’t accept you with your faults included, maybe they don’t deserve you at all.” He flourished a hand. “On the other hand, if you want to improve, you can always try asking for a second chance.”
Resting an elbow on his knee, he made a fist and leaned his chin atop his knuckles. “Say...mind me asking how many relationships you’ve been in before?”
Quote:
While some might jump to defend their ex, even though they were an ex, Xi-Wang didn’t do so. He listened to the other however, sure that Kit had far more knowledge and experience than he did. Finishing his juice, as he listened, he settled for nodding his head to most of what the other said. Shifting to move closer to the other, keeping his movement as small as he could in order to not gain attention as the other spoke. He didn’t want to distract the other.
“Mmm….” Slowly he nodded his head. “He said I loved living with other people...like I enjoyed not having a home. But it just seemed like there was another meaning to it also….one that’s dirty….” That combined with not listening to him about the blind date, and instead thinking he’d been cheating, it had hurt Xi-Wang to hear from Caleb then and it still bothered him but now it angered him more than anything. “I-I think you’re right and he didn’t listen...not just then. Before then...the start, I think, was that I didn’t move in with him as soon as he asked me out. I tried to tell him it was too soon - too fast.” And Caleb hadn’t listneed or understood. His comment about Xi-Wang loving to live with other people implied, at least to him, that the issue was him living anywhere but with Caleb. It was a problem with Caleb and communication, or accepting something he said?
“I just got some freedom...and he had just asked me out, right after meeting me...the same day. It felt too soon - too fast. To move in a week after he asks me out.” Shaking his head a bit he drew his long legs up to his chest and let his dark eyes turn onto the other male. “He said I didn’t notice anything in his life going on….that I didn’t care what went on in his life. M-maybe I didn’t but I was new to the dark mirror then, at the start of it, I’d just moved out of Romano’s and out of a motel also….I was living with Acubens.”
Puffing out a breath he pressed his face into his knees and shook his head. “I don’t think I can go back...I don’t want to. I think...I think it’s too broken. Too many problems on both sides. I can’t….I don’t want to.” The last few words spoken with a bit more strength, he was sure on this. That was a chapter which was done. There wasn’t any turning the page back to that. They’d hurt each other and both of them had issues. They couldn’t work together.
“None...none before then. I-I couldn’t…” He answered softly, lifting his head up. “I didn’t date till him.” He wasn’t ready for a lot of what had suddenly been expected...playing house. There was no ease into things.
“Mmm….” Slowly he nodded his head. “He said I loved living with other people...like I enjoyed not having a home. But it just seemed like there was another meaning to it also….one that’s dirty….” That combined with not listening to him about the blind date, and instead thinking he’d been cheating, it had hurt Xi-Wang to hear from Caleb then and it still bothered him but now it angered him more than anything. “I-I think you’re right and he didn’t listen...not just then. Before then...the start, I think, was that I didn’t move in with him as soon as he asked me out. I tried to tell him it was too soon - too fast.” And Caleb hadn’t listneed or understood. His comment about Xi-Wang loving to live with other people implied, at least to him, that the issue was him living anywhere but with Caleb. It was a problem with Caleb and communication, or accepting something he said?
“I just got some freedom...and he had just asked me out, right after meeting me...the same day. It felt too soon - too fast. To move in a week after he asks me out.” Shaking his head a bit he drew his long legs up to his chest and let his dark eyes turn onto the other male. “He said I didn’t notice anything in his life going on….that I didn’t care what went on in his life. M-maybe I didn’t but I was new to the dark mirror then, at the start of it, I’d just moved out of Romano’s and out of a motel also….I was living with Acubens.”
Puffing out a breath he pressed his face into his knees and shook his head. “I don’t think I can go back...I don’t want to. I think...I think it’s too broken. Too many problems on both sides. I can’t….I don’t want to.” The last few words spoken with a bit more strength, he was sure on this. That was a chapter which was done. There wasn’t any turning the page back to that. They’d hurt each other and both of them had issues. They couldn’t work together.
“None...none before then. I-I couldn’t…” He answered softly, lifting his head up. “I didn’t date till him.” He wasn’t ready for a lot of what had suddenly been expected...playing house. There was no ease into things.
Quote:
”Yeah...people often say things to try to hurt others when they themselves are hurting,” Kit remarked sadly. “I’m sorry you weren’t able to get through to him about what you wanted to do. But if you already told him this at the start and he seemed to be fine with you not living with him for however long you were together, then it’s his fault for not speaking up about it sooner, isn’t it?” He scratched his head. “So you’ve been living with Acubens up until you moved in with Nischal and Jason?”
Watching Xi-Wang hide his face against his knees, Kit scooted closer and drew the other young man into his lap, hugging him from behind and resting his cheek against his shoulder. “Good for you, sweetheart,” he said. “Better to know what doesn’t make you happy and move on than to keep clinging to something with false hopes. Otherwise you get stuck.”
He raised a hand to stroke the other’s hair. “It’s especially tough if it’s your first relationship. But that takes guts.” Pausing a second, he then asked, “Do you know if you ever loved him at any point?”
Watching Xi-Wang hide his face against his knees, Kit scooted closer and drew the other young man into his lap, hugging him from behind and resting his cheek against his shoulder. “Good for you, sweetheart,” he said. “Better to know what doesn’t make you happy and move on than to keep clinging to something with false hopes. Otherwise you get stuck.”
He raised a hand to stroke the other’s hair. “It’s especially tough if it’s your first relationship. But that takes guts.” Pausing a second, he then asked, “Do you know if you ever loved him at any point?”
Quote:
That made sense though it wasn’t right, to hurt someone sel just because you were hurting? It lead to nothing but more hurt for everyone in the end. But it made sense. He hoped that was all it had been and that Caleb hadn’t meant those words, especially what he felt was implied. “I moved in with him at some point...I mean I’d been moving my stuff in slowly for a while. Every time I’d spend a day or a night more things came from Acubens home and stayed at his place. I guess...maybe he was upset I didn’t move in sooner...or thought I had?” But he hadn’t. He’d moved in when he had, he hadn’t announced that all his stuff was moved in though, but Caleb should have noticed that slowly more things had been moving in and then suddenly nothing more - right?
Yelping, and lifting his head, as he was suddenly being moved Xi-Wang’s arms came up and went about the others neck to keep from falling or anything. He hadn’t expected the sudden movement, and his change in seating. “I’ve spent too much of my life unhappy...I want to be happy now. I’m out of my home and I have a family.” It was his turn to be happy and he didn’t want to remain where he wasn’t wanted...where there was hurt. It sounded selfish but he knew it wasn’t, knew Kit would tell him as much. He just wanted to have a normal relationship...whatever that was.
“You mean to leave...takes guts?” He questioned before shaking his head. “Mayb...I don’t think it took guts though. I think I just wanted to do what he said - leave. I didn’t want him to continue to hurt and I didn’t want to hurt. It felt like I was giving up a bit but I think it was for the best.” For them both, at least he thought so now. That didn’t mean he hadn’t cried that night, hadn’t remained outside in the hallway curled up on his bags crying.
Sighing he shrugged as he laid his head on the others shoulder. “I think so...but I also don’t know if I know what love is. I mean it moved so fast...the asking out, the moving in. His parents had offered him a trip, to wherever he wanted, for graduation. He was offering to tell them CHina - for me...and to bring me. I tried to talk him out of it, I think I did, but it felt so soon. I spent more time hiding things, trying to deal with how fast things were...and then the cold shoulder…” Lifting his hands he spread them out a bit before letting them fall into his lap, in a helpless sort of move.
“I don’t think I got much time to enjoy it and just...be in a relationship. It was here and there times. I know I wanted to. I enjoyed spending time with him...I enjoyed things when they were good...I wanted it all to be like those good times.”
Yelping, and lifting his head, as he was suddenly being moved Xi-Wang’s arms came up and went about the others neck to keep from falling or anything. He hadn’t expected the sudden movement, and his change in seating. “I’ve spent too much of my life unhappy...I want to be happy now. I’m out of my home and I have a family.” It was his turn to be happy and he didn’t want to remain where he wasn’t wanted...where there was hurt. It sounded selfish but he knew it wasn’t, knew Kit would tell him as much. He just wanted to have a normal relationship...whatever that was.
“You mean to leave...takes guts?” He questioned before shaking his head. “Mayb...I don’t think it took guts though. I think I just wanted to do what he said - leave. I didn’t want him to continue to hurt and I didn’t want to hurt. It felt like I was giving up a bit but I think it was for the best.” For them both, at least he thought so now. That didn’t mean he hadn’t cried that night, hadn’t remained outside in the hallway curled up on his bags crying.
Sighing he shrugged as he laid his head on the others shoulder. “I think so...but I also don’t know if I know what love is. I mean it moved so fast...the asking out, the moving in. His parents had offered him a trip, to wherever he wanted, for graduation. He was offering to tell them CHina - for me...and to bring me. I tried to talk him out of it, I think I did, but it felt so soon. I spent more time hiding things, trying to deal with how fast things were...and then the cold shoulder…” Lifting his hands he spread them out a bit before letting them fall into his lap, in a helpless sort of move.
“I don’t think I got much time to enjoy it and just...be in a relationship. It was here and there times. I know I wanted to. I enjoyed spending time with him...I enjoyed things when they were good...I wanted it all to be like those good times.”
Quote:
His brow creased in confusion. “So...you were only halfway moved in? Like in the process of it, but wouldn’t spend every single night there? That’s why he was upset?”
Kit had wondered if Xi-Wang would push him away, hit him, or otherwise reject his forwardness, but instead he found arms about his neck. Perhaps it had only been due to the surprise of being moved and, once Xi-Wang was sure he wasn’t going to fall over, would move away. Instead, however, the slightly shorter young man gradually came to rest his head on an astonished Kit’s shoulder. Going with the flow, Kit draped his arms about Xi-Wang and loosely clasped his hands around his form.
“That’s a good goal,” he commented softly at the proclamation that the other black-haired youth wanted to be happy. “And yeah, leaving takes guts. More than just that, I think.” Looking to Xi-Wang, he pointed out, “You could have tried to smooth things over and just pretended everything was alright in order to please him and stay together. You could have tried to convince yourself that being together was the most important thing.
“But then you wouldn’t have been happy and it’s important to remember to consider your own feelings as much as the other person’s in a relationship. That’s my take on it, anyway.” A hand came up to stroke the other’s back. “You had to pick between the pain you felt right then at the idea of breaking up and the pain of continuing the charade. If you thought it was for the best to part ways, then it probably was. Seems like it’s generally a good idea to trust your instincts.”
The mention of love drew a pained smile to Kit’s lips. “Yeah...love’s a weird emotion. It can just as easily save as destroy a person. The inexperienced often mistake other feelings for it. Or sometimes people are simply in love with the idea of love rather than actually feeling the thing itself.” He shrugged.
“Sounds like you were pretty uncomfortable with his pace,” the tattooed teen remarked. “And I don’t blame you. Especially for a first relationship. But it also sounds like you think you know what might have gone wrong, so those are good things to keep in mind for the future moving forward.”
Absently taking one of Xi-Wang’s hands from his lap, he playfully pressed their palms and fingers together to compare the sizes. “I understand wanting your relationship to have good times, cupcake. No one can fault you for that,” he assured him. ”But in my opinion, you can’t have good times without the bad any more than you can have a shadow without a light. In fact, I think it’s the bad times that are the best tests for true love.” Though he wasn’t facing Xi-Wang and his expression wasn’t visible, Kit’s smile grew melancholy.
Kit had wondered if Xi-Wang would push him away, hit him, or otherwise reject his forwardness, but instead he found arms about his neck. Perhaps it had only been due to the surprise of being moved and, once Xi-Wang was sure he wasn’t going to fall over, would move away. Instead, however, the slightly shorter young man gradually came to rest his head on an astonished Kit’s shoulder. Going with the flow, Kit draped his arms about Xi-Wang and loosely clasped his hands around his form.
“That’s a good goal,” he commented softly at the proclamation that the other black-haired youth wanted to be happy. “And yeah, leaving takes guts. More than just that, I think.” Looking to Xi-Wang, he pointed out, “You could have tried to smooth things over and just pretended everything was alright in order to please him and stay together. You could have tried to convince yourself that being together was the most important thing.
“But then you wouldn’t have been happy and it’s important to remember to consider your own feelings as much as the other person’s in a relationship. That’s my take on it, anyway.” A hand came up to stroke the other’s back. “You had to pick between the pain you felt right then at the idea of breaking up and the pain of continuing the charade. If you thought it was for the best to part ways, then it probably was. Seems like it’s generally a good idea to trust your instincts.”
The mention of love drew a pained smile to Kit’s lips. “Yeah...love’s a weird emotion. It can just as easily save as destroy a person. The inexperienced often mistake other feelings for it. Or sometimes people are simply in love with the idea of love rather than actually feeling the thing itself.” He shrugged.
“Sounds like you were pretty uncomfortable with his pace,” the tattooed teen remarked. “And I don’t blame you. Especially for a first relationship. But it also sounds like you think you know what might have gone wrong, so those are good things to keep in mind for the future moving forward.”
Absently taking one of Xi-Wang’s hands from his lap, he playfully pressed their palms and fingers together to compare the sizes. “I understand wanting your relationship to have good times, cupcake. No one can fault you for that,” he assured him. ”But in my opinion, you can’t have good times without the bad any more than you can have a shadow without a light. In fact, I think it’s the bad times that are the best tests for true love.” Though he wasn’t facing Xi-Wang and his expression wasn’t visible, Kit’s smile grew melancholy.
Quote:
“I think so...but no. I wasn’t fully moved in...not for a few weeks. I took my time, leaving more and more things as I spent more time. Eventually it was just all there and I was moved in.” And somehow Caleb had thought he’d moved in at the start, or something? Either way it was what seemed to have started the upset between them, which meant it had been there almost the whole time.
“I did that...I’d been feeling the cold shoulder from him for a while.” Dark eyes shifting, trying to think back on how long back that had been. “Mmm, I think before the lights in the sky. And he was short with me - when we talked. I felt like I had to tiptoe about...that I’d done something wrong but I didn’t know how to approach him, since he was being that way. I didn’t want to step out of line, I guess, and ask.” Which he supposed was where he should have spoken up but he hadn’t. But Caleb could have said something, let him know he was upset and over what.
“So I really did try and pretend for a while, at least on the outside. I think inside I knew something was wrong...I felt it. I just didn’t want to end things.” Like it would magically fix itself - how stupid of him. How could something fix itself, especially when he didn’t even know what was wrong.
“Mmm, I think I have an idea now...since I’ve experienced it. I think I’d have known anyway...but not to the degree it would bother me. But I also realized I wanted to have a relationship and I’d been letting it continue, for that reason, when I didn’t think it would work deep down…” Shrugging a bit he leaned into the others rubbing hand, it felt nice. Actually Kit was being really nice, and comfortable, and Xi-Wang was going to soak it up for as long as he could. “I’m glad it ended really...” It felt good in a way, now that time had passed. He didn’t have to keep being a dark mirror senshi a secret, which he hadn’t liked doing, and he didn’t feel like he was walking on thin ice with someone.
Shifting in the others lap, his dark eyes seeking out the others equally dark eyes. “That makes sense. Though when the dark, and bad, outweighs the good...by too much it becomes too much and breaks.” Softly he spoke as he moved his hand against the others. His own hand similar in size to the others. Long and slender fingers Xi-Wang had, actually a lot about his build in general was slender. “You’ve had a lot of relationship experience...good and bad….” That much was obvious, just by listening to the other, and perhaps a lot of bad? He wasn’t sure but the other certainly understood well.
“I guess this is where I start learning as well.” When he started to grow a bit more, mature. Experience was a good way to learn, right? So it was his chance to learn, and mistakes and bad experiences were good ways to learn. “Like you said...I know I don’t want something to move so fast.” It didn’t want what was in a romance movie either, that all felt too off ..too staged and done on purpose.
“I did that...I’d been feeling the cold shoulder from him for a while.” Dark eyes shifting, trying to think back on how long back that had been. “Mmm, I think before the lights in the sky. And he was short with me - when we talked. I felt like I had to tiptoe about...that I’d done something wrong but I didn’t know how to approach him, since he was being that way. I didn’t want to step out of line, I guess, and ask.” Which he supposed was where he should have spoken up but he hadn’t. But Caleb could have said something, let him know he was upset and over what.
“So I really did try and pretend for a while, at least on the outside. I think inside I knew something was wrong...I felt it. I just didn’t want to end things.” Like it would magically fix itself - how stupid of him. How could something fix itself, especially when he didn’t even know what was wrong.
“Mmm, I think I have an idea now...since I’ve experienced it. I think I’d have known anyway...but not to the degree it would bother me. But I also realized I wanted to have a relationship and I’d been letting it continue, for that reason, when I didn’t think it would work deep down…” Shrugging a bit he leaned into the others rubbing hand, it felt nice. Actually Kit was being really nice, and comfortable, and Xi-Wang was going to soak it up for as long as he could. “I’m glad it ended really...” It felt good in a way, now that time had passed. He didn’t have to keep being a dark mirror senshi a secret, which he hadn’t liked doing, and he didn’t feel like he was walking on thin ice with someone.
Shifting in the others lap, his dark eyes seeking out the others equally dark eyes. “That makes sense. Though when the dark, and bad, outweighs the good...by too much it becomes too much and breaks.” Softly he spoke as he moved his hand against the others. His own hand similar in size to the others. Long and slender fingers Xi-Wang had, actually a lot about his build in general was slender. “You’ve had a lot of relationship experience...good and bad….” That much was obvious, just by listening to the other, and perhaps a lot of bad? He wasn’t sure but the other certainly understood well.
“I guess this is where I start learning as well.” When he started to grow a bit more, mature. Experience was a good way to learn, right? So it was his chance to learn, and mistakes and bad experiences were good ways to learn. “Like you said...I know I don’t want something to move so fast.” It didn’t want what was in a romance movie either, that all felt too off ..too staged and done on purpose.
Quote:
”Ah. So he didn’t want to speak up and you were concerned about asking.” Resting his cheek against the back of Xi-Wang’s neck, he replied, “It’s natural to want to pretend everything’s alright, I think. At least to begin with. Because you never know if the problem might just be imagined or if it’ll solve itself in time.” He continued to stroke the other’s dark, smooth hair.
“Plus, you don’t want to have to break up over something that might just turn out to be trivial. If you’ve never had a relationship before, it’s easy to lose confidence, think you’re doing something wrong, and that it’s your fault if things aren’t going right.”
Pausing, he asked, “Do you know if it was his first relationship, too?” If it wasn’t, that was all the more reason for Xi-Wang to have felt insecure about his role in it. That if Caleb had more experience, then surely he, as someone lacking in it, was the one at fault. It was an easy trap to fall into. The important thing, though, was recognizing it and being aware of it for the future so as to avoid falling for it again.
Kit nodded, his cheek brushing against the other’s skin to indicate the movement of his head while he was behind and out of sight. At the mention of relationship experience, however, he was smirking again, his voice rueful. “I’ve only been in one real relationship before,” he said honestly. “And that one broke me. So I just go for flings, now.”
He lifted his head from Xi-Wang’s neck. “Maybe that makes me a whore. But it’s much easier to enjoy the pleasure from touch than to invest your heart and soul in another person. Especially when they end up stomping on them.” Ruffling the other’s hair once more, he extricated himself and stood up to throw away their trash. “Don’t be like me.” It’s such a lonely existence.
“It’s good to learn and be able to pick yourself back up. Especially from something as devastating as the loss of a first love. And if you have the strength to do it, all the better, because what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Kit washed his hands at the sink, head low, expression inscrutable. “Want any more food, or shall I pack it away? You can take it all home with you if you like. For your friends.”
“Plus, you don’t want to have to break up over something that might just turn out to be trivial. If you’ve never had a relationship before, it’s easy to lose confidence, think you’re doing something wrong, and that it’s your fault if things aren’t going right.”
Pausing, he asked, “Do you know if it was his first relationship, too?” If it wasn’t, that was all the more reason for Xi-Wang to have felt insecure about his role in it. That if Caleb had more experience, then surely he, as someone lacking in it, was the one at fault. It was an easy trap to fall into. The important thing, though, was recognizing it and being aware of it for the future so as to avoid falling for it again.
Kit nodded, his cheek brushing against the other’s skin to indicate the movement of his head while he was behind and out of sight. At the mention of relationship experience, however, he was smirking again, his voice rueful. “I’ve only been in one real relationship before,” he said honestly. “And that one broke me. So I just go for flings, now.”
He lifted his head from Xi-Wang’s neck. “Maybe that makes me a whore. But it’s much easier to enjoy the pleasure from touch than to invest your heart and soul in another person. Especially when they end up stomping on them.” Ruffling the other’s hair once more, he extricated himself and stood up to throw away their trash. “Don’t be like me.” It’s such a lonely existence.
“It’s good to learn and be able to pick yourself back up. Especially from something as devastating as the loss of a first love. And if you have the strength to do it, all the better, because what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Kit washed his hands at the sink, head low, expression inscrutable. “Want any more food, or shall I pack it away? You can take it all home with you if you like. For your friends.”
Quote:
“Mm, that sounds about right. I did wonder if I was just imagining things...since it’s the first time I’ve dated someone.” And he’d wondered if it was in his head or him being too critical...or assuming things. At a certain point though it hadn’t just been him, it couldn’t have been. It had just taken time to realize that...and then more time to realize it wouldn’t just fix itself, though he had wished it would have. Tilting his head forward a bit, offering up more of the back of his neck for Kit to lean against. Sighing softly, content, his fingers toyed with the sleeves to his top.
“Mmm, it was his first also…” But the other had certainly seemed confident in some things, or just fast paced, which he hadn’t expected or known how to handle beyond what little he’d done. It seemed like Kit understood though, more than he’d hoped anyone would, and it was reassuring knowing what he did was understandable. That he hadn’t been wrong...just lacking experience and he hadn’t been in the wrong anyway.
Sighing softly at the others almost...nuzzling, it seemed like that anyway. Reaching back to pet the others dark, curly, hair. “Mmm, feels nice.” The words spoken softly. Kit was really nice for cuddles and attention, at least in his opinion. Preparing to shift and turn around in the others lap, wanting to look the other in the face. “I wouldn’t think that about you. You were hurt...and don’t want to be again. But if you’re lonely...than why not find the right person? Someone you know won’t hurt you?” Shifting, or rather sliding from the others lap, he settled onto the couch as Kit stood up.
Watching as the other went to remove, and toss out, their trash he got up and shuffled after the other. “We can pack the food and split it between us, half to you and half to me.” Shuffling forward he let his arm arms wrap about the other, taking his turn in snuggling his face into the back of the others neck. “You should find someone Kit...you should be happy and not lonely.” The other was too good, from what he could tell at this point, for something like that.
“Mmm, it was his first also…” But the other had certainly seemed confident in some things, or just fast paced, which he hadn’t expected or known how to handle beyond what little he’d done. It seemed like Kit understood though, more than he’d hoped anyone would, and it was reassuring knowing what he did was understandable. That he hadn’t been wrong...just lacking experience and he hadn’t been in the wrong anyway.
Sighing softly at the others almost...nuzzling, it seemed like that anyway. Reaching back to pet the others dark, curly, hair. “Mmm, feels nice.” The words spoken softly. Kit was really nice for cuddles and attention, at least in his opinion. Preparing to shift and turn around in the others lap, wanting to look the other in the face. “I wouldn’t think that about you. You were hurt...and don’t want to be again. But if you’re lonely...than why not find the right person? Someone you know won’t hurt you?” Shifting, or rather sliding from the others lap, he settled onto the couch as Kit stood up.
Watching as the other went to remove, and toss out, their trash he got up and shuffled after the other. “We can pack the food and split it between us, half to you and half to me.” Shuffling forward he let his arm arms wrap about the other, taking his turn in snuggling his face into the back of the others neck. “You should find someone Kit...you should be happy and not lonely.” The other was too good, from what he could tell at this point, for something like that.
Quote:
The tan-skinned youth shook his head. ”If he was making a fuss over it later on, doesn’t sound like you were just imaging them,” he pointed out. “And if it was also his first relationship, then it makes sense that there would be problems because he probably didn’t know how to go about a lot of things like communicating his doubts and insecurities, either. Seems like it’s a good thing you guys ended it if neither of you were happy.” If they hadn’t been comfortable enough with bringing up their issues with one another, then perhaps they just weren’t meant to be.
When he finished washing his hands, he moved to dry them off - only to find Xi-Wang with his face pressed against the back of his own neck. He felt his temperature rise and smiled softly. Raising a hand to run along the other’s arm, he chuckled a little. “You make it sound so easy...just going out and finding the right person.” Kit stood there a little while, simply indulging in the sweetness of his companion’s embrace. “You never know who will hurt you, though. Even if they don’t mean to.”
Tugging one of Xi-Wang’s arms from around, he brought the hand to his lips. “You’d better not tempt me. I’m not very good at holding back.” He turned his head to peer at the other teen over his shoulder, grinning. “Besides, we need to get this food put away.” Another kiss to the back of the hand. “And worry about your own happiness. I’ll be fine. But thanks for worrying about me. It means a lot.” Gently releasing Xi-Wang, he went to the table to start distributing the food and closing the take-away containers.
When he finished washing his hands, he moved to dry them off - only to find Xi-Wang with his face pressed against the back of his own neck. He felt his temperature rise and smiled softly. Raising a hand to run along the other’s arm, he chuckled a little. “You make it sound so easy...just going out and finding the right person.” Kit stood there a little while, simply indulging in the sweetness of his companion’s embrace. “You never know who will hurt you, though. Even if they don’t mean to.”
Tugging one of Xi-Wang’s arms from around, he brought the hand to his lips. “You’d better not tempt me. I’m not very good at holding back.” He turned his head to peer at the other teen over his shoulder, grinning. “Besides, we need to get this food put away.” Another kiss to the back of the hand. “And worry about your own happiness. I’ll be fine. But thanks for worrying about me. It means a lot.” Gently releasing Xi-Wang, he went to the table to start distributing the food and closing the take-away containers.
