[Open Class] Disguise for Dummies (Ruth)

[Huni Pi]

NAME OF CLASS: Disguise for Dummies (aka the TL;DR class)
ToTER'S NAME: Old Batty

General information:
Batty is a doppelganger, and as such he's pretty good at disguising himself amongst humans, hiding in their midst until he sees the opportunity to wreak havoc. He knows some of Amityville's students don't have it so easy, and he has made it a mission to help those kids who were not fortunate enough to have been born awesome as they attempt to blend into the world of humans.

Whether you have expressed interest in attempting this class yourself or Batty has singled you out for whatever reason, one day a map and an electronic card key will be shoved under the door of your dorm. If you choose to follow the map, you find yourself standing in front of a featureless metal door sunk into the side of a short, rocky hill. There is a slot to the door's right which seems to be the perfect place to swipe your mysterious card. When you do, the door slides open, revealing a long staircase heading further into the hill, and a cool rush of air washes over you.

it's game time

Mechanics:

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STEP ONE: CHOOSE A COSTUME
Your first stop is Batty's Costume Warehouse. If you want to blend into human society effectively, you have to dress convincingly. Wigs, noses, face paint, uniforms, socks, underwear, earrings, toe rings, tongue rings - Batty's got 'em all.

As you enter the costume warehouse you might feel slightly uneasy, whether because it's your first time visiting the giant underground structure and you don't know what to expect, or because it's your thousandth time in here and you do. You choose a direction and start on the path to your disguise destiny.

Roll 1d100 and match your result to the guide below to see if you have successfully chosen a costume. The results of your roll may change periodically, so please check to make sure there are no differences if you haven't attempted this class in a while!

1-10: You search the warehouse for a while, finding no costumes that interest you. But suddenly... LAB COATS. EVERYWHERE. You pick one out and put it on, mostly because they are the only articles of clothing for what seems like miles. And what's that in the pocket of your new coat? A rubber scalpel and some nitrous oxide! Now we're talking! You are a (bad) plastic surgeon. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

11-15: You have chosen the perfect costume. It fits. You look good. Too bad about that security tag. As you reach the warehouse exit, a row of deadly lasers spark to life and burn your new clothing from your body. YOU FAIL

16-20: Left, left, left, right, left. No, you haven't found an army uniform, but you are hopelessly lost in the warehouse. Maybe if you cry, scream, or rage long enough, some of Batty's bats will come rescue you. YOU FAIL

21-30: You find a sweatervest, a pair of glasses, and a clipboard under
a pile of life-size human dolls. You are a psychiatrist! PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

31-40: This wing of the warehouse smells faintly of hot dogs and chlorine. And look! There, on the only hanger in sight, is a tank top, short-shorts, a whistle, and a giant tube of Zinka! You're a camp counselor! PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

41-45: The costume you chose is far too large. As you try to exit the warehouse, some of the fabric gets caught on something and begins to unravel. Your costume is ruined! Sorry about that! YOU FAIL

46-50: You have stumbled upon the rockstar section of the warehouse. The outfit you change into here not only leaves you barely dressed, but the little you are wearing is bedazzled beyond belief. PROCEED TO STEP TWO. Your costume is so awesome that you automatically pass Step Three if you make it there.

51-55: The only outfit you can find is made entirely of fruit. As you stroll toward the exit, a handful of hungry bats steal your costume piece by juicy piece. YOU FAIL

56-60: You are an archaeologist! You've got a magnifying glass, a whole bunch of those little brushes, and more khaki clothing than you know what to do with. But you want to be even more convincing. You need treasure. There's a shiny medallion sitting on a pedestal nearby, but when you pick it up, there's a rumbling and suddenly a giant stone ball is rolling toward you! Run! Get crushed! Any way you slice it, YOU FAIL

61-70: A poofy hat, an apron, a big twirly mustache... You are a sous chef! PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.
71-80: After walking for quite a while, you come to a dead end. But this is no ordinary dead end. The ground here is blanketed with a neatly trimmed carpet of grass and there are golf balls and clubs strewn around the area. There are also several fanboy/girl dolls here, as well as a polo shirt and a pair of plaid pants. You are a golf pro. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

81-85: You wander through an area of total darkness. Even if you can see in the dark, you find your vision impaired by some strange force. You feel many tiny pairs of hands strapping you into an outlandish outfit. When you can finally see again, you find that you have been dressed like Lady Gaga. There will be no blending for you. YOU FAIL

86-95: Your costume marks you as one who hails from a long line of asbestos abatement experts. Congratulations, you are a hazmat worker. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

96-100: You wander through the warehouse for a while, finding no outfit that really speaks to you. Eventually, however, you feel a wave of knowledge wash over you and you know that for the duration of this challenge, your connection with the animal world will help you along your journey. You are a zookeeper, and this costume grants you the ability to pass Step Two no matter what you roll. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

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STEP TWO: CHOOSE A PET
Humans love animals. There's no easier way to blend into the human world than to take your pet sloth out for a jog after work.

Once you have changed into your new outfit and nothing seems to have gone wrong, you are free to continue into the "kennel" where toy versions of some of the human race's favorite pets are available for your use.

Roll 1d10 to choose a pet. These results may change periodically as well.

1: You picked a dog. Some form of collie, it seems. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP THREE.

2: You have chosen a manx cat. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP THREE.

3: Your elephant doll is too heavy to carry. Too bad, so sad. YOU FAIL

4: A flamingo! How nice. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP THREE.

5: You have chosen a charming, slimy slug. It brings out your eyes! PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP THREE.

6: What's that? A unicorn? You're so lucky to have found one! Not only may you proceed to Step Three, you may also have another life.

7: You pick up an alligator plush and it explodes in your arms. YOU FAIL

8: A beaver! How woodsy! PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP THREE.

9: You probably have no idea what possessed you to pick up the Human Toddler Doll(tm), but now it won't stop crying and asking questions. You'll never hide in plain sight now! YOU FAIL

10: A quagga? Seriously? Those are extinct, fool! YOU FAIL

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STEP THREE: CHOOSE YOUR NEIGHBORS
You're finally ready to try your hand at blending. You won't be meeting any real humans in this next phase, but these human simulators (robots) are close enough.

Upon exiting the kennel, you are faced with a long hallway. At the end of this hall is a four-way crossroads, the door at the end of each path marked with a different direction. Roll 1d4 in your next post to see which door you choose.

1 (North Door): Everyone on the other side of the North Door loves hats. Sure, you might stand out a bit at first if you don't have one, but either way they'll find you a fine chapeau soon enough, no questions asked. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP FOUR.

2 (South Door): All of the people behind the South Door are psychiatrists. If you're not a psychiatrist, they will sniff you out and YOU FAIL. If you are a psychiatrist, you may proceed to step four.

3 (East Door): These "people" don't speak any language you've ever heard of. They're scaly and they walk on four legs and they might remind you a little of home, depending on who you are. You've invaded a den of robotic komodo dragons. Luckily for you, they don't seem to care what you're wearing or what toy you're carrying. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP FOUR.

4 (West Door): A sharp-eyed kid sees you as soon as you pass through the West Door and promptly tells the authorities. You catch a glimpse of the community you might have successfully infiltrated, but that is all you see before you are ejected. YOU FAIL

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STEP FOUR: ASSIMILATE OR DIE
You have dressed like them, adopted their domesticated wildlife, and been accepted into their midst... for now. Will you pass The Final Test? Roll 1d20 to find out.

1-13: You're pretty good at this human thing, but something's still not quite right. While hanging out with these faux fearbags, you make some form of unforgivable error which alerts them to your presence. YOU FAIL, unless you still have one of your lives, in which case, lucky you.

14-20: Your human act is flawless! Congratulations, you've passed!

Bonus Mechanics:

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Doppelgangers get an extra two chances to pass Step Four if they make it that far.
Y2 students get two lives.
Y3 students get three.

If you fail a step and still have an extra life, you must use it to retry that step, not bypass it.

You complete the class when:

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You pass Step Four! Yay.

 

[Huni Pi]

Step One

Ruth only needed to pass a few more classes before she could take her final exam. And she was more than curious about the disguise class that the doppelganger held. So when slots opened up, she signed for it without a second thought. And immediately she was required to go find a disguise.

She wondered whether or not she would need one given that she was a reaper and could easily pass for a human to begin with. But that wasn't the point of this class now, was it? Wordlessly and soundlessly, Ruth careful began to rummage through the options available to her. There were times when she had almost found a set, only to have someone come in at the last moment and snatch it away from her.

She wasn't offended, in a way she liked to think it was confirmation that she was going unnoticed, though it did get a tad irritating when it happened for the third time. Finally, when it looked like she could get her own disguise, she roughly elbowed her way in and grabbed an armful of whatever she could from underneath a pair of life-sized human dolls. She retreated a good distance away and settled in a corner to sort her loot.

She had a sweater vest, a pair of glasses, and a clipboard. Oh. It seemed that she was going to be a psychiatrist.

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21-30: You find a sweatervest, a pair of glasses, and a clipboard under
a pile of life-size human dolls. You are a psychiatrist! PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP TWO.

 

[Huni Pi]

Step Two

With her disguise in hand, Ruth followed the others who had also successfully found their own disguises and waited for further instructions. Oh, apparently they were required to put the disguise on first. Ruth carefully excused herself to go and change into the outfit. She had to wait until all the colors from the clothes had leeched out into grays before she emerged.

With the exception of the glasses (which she did put on but given her bangs obscured her eyes by nature, the spectacles could not be seen as a result), Ruth thought she looked snappily dressed and quite presentable. Although the skirt she had on didn't quite go with the sweater vest but there was nothing she could do about that now.

She strolled out of the room acting like nothing was wrong (and there was nothing wrong) and headed back to the others. Once there she learned they were supposed to have pets. Huh. She supposed it should complete the look so she went in to get a plush. The shape of the flamingo reminded her of her weapon and of course she would feel compelled to get that.

When no one stopped her or chided her for her choice, she headed out of the “kennel.”

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4: A flamingo! How nice. PLEASE PROCEED TO STEP THREE.

 

[Huni Pi]

Step Three

Alright, disguise on, "pet" in hand, it looked like it was time to do some actual blending! Ruth was both excited and nervous at the prospect of interacting with humans and was quickly disappointed to learn that no, they weren't actually going to be interacting with real humans and instead with simulations. Oh jack damn it. Ruth couldn't help but frown at this discovery but she quickly removed the frown and turned it upside down.

She watched and waited for the other students to go down the hallway and only when she herself was being nudged forward did she start walking. Of the four doors, Ruth ended up picking the South Door out of sheer random reasoning. When she stepped through the door, she tried not to freeze or act too stiff. Her shoulders were relaxed and she carried herself like she was supposed to be there.

And seeing that the other "humans" present were all wearing similar clothing, she realized she lucked out in having other psychiatrists as neighbors in this part of the class.

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2 (South Door): All of the people behind the South Door are psychiatrists. If you're not a psychiatrist, they will sniff you out and YOU FAIL. If you are a psychiatrist, you may proceed to step four.
- is a psychiatrist.

 

[Huni Pi]

Step Four

Ruth was in the homestretch of the class it seemed! She was dressed appropriately, at least enough that the drab grayness of her ensemble didn't gather any sort of suspicion from the non-humans. The pet she had was thankfully not an article of clothing and that meant her natural color-leech ability did not affect it, so the pinkness of the plush remained.

The robots were milling about and talking in incoherent gibberish and all Ruth did was smile and nod. She noted that they would look at their clipboard now and again and she would do this as well. She continued with the smiling and the nodding for several minutes, thinking that she was going to pass this class without so much as a hitch when she noticed one of the robots was staring at her.

Slowly, the others began to turn their gaze to her and Ruth unconsciously blurred as a response. There were squeaking and beeping in alarm at her sudden shift in visibility and Ruth was forced to raise the clipboard as she began to speak "Calm down, calm down, you all need to rest your eyes. When was the last time you had a long nap?"

The question caused the robots to go into a gibbering conversation and Ruth lucked out in diverting their attention.

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1-13: You're pretty good at this human thing, but something's still not quite right. While hanging out with these faux fearbags, you make some form of unforgivable error which alerts them to your presence. YOU FAIL, unless you still have one of your lives, in which case, lucky you.
- extra life, "lucky you"