|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 8:39 am
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 9:33 am
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 2:36 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 4:00 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 4:14 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 7:43 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 7:27 am
|
|
|
|
Size can be an issue, but it's actually far less common of an issue than most people think. The average v****a can elongate and stretch quite a bit if the woman is in the mood, relaxed, and well lubricated. And most of us do have that "average" v****a (although our v****a size can feel drastically different - to us and/or our partner - based mostly on how lubricated, relaxed, and in the mood we are). When size is an issue, then it generally hurts the whole time (unless you find a position that suits your sizes better and switch to that position), not just for a little while at the start. So I don't think size has anything to do with this issue. This sounds like a dryness/tension/not being in the mood enough upon initial entry issue to me.
I highly recommend these articles (I'll put some of the highlights here for people who don't want to click links, but I do recommend clicking the link to read the full article if you can):
"...the variance in sizes between women are much lesser than those between men....differences between pre-menopausal women of a similar reproductive history -- as in, how many times they have been pregnant or given birth: not how many times they have had sex -- usually only vary within an inch or so, max. Even between women with some variance in reproductive history and age, we still don't see the kinds of differences we see among men with p***s size.
Vaginas are closed, or collapsed, muscular tubes when nothing is in them, kind of like when your mouth or throat is closed, they're pretty much collapsed unto themselves.
When a woman is just lying around, hanging out and reading a book, her v****a is not hanging open: it's closed. But when we put something inside the v****a -- be that a finger, a tampon, a p***s, a speculum or -- from the other direction -- an infant's head during childbirth -- the v****a expands to surround and grip what is inside it and has a great deal of flexibility and variability in terms of how big or small it can be when something is inside of it....In a lot of ways, even talking about vaginas as having sizes is about as apt as talking about rubber bands or balloons as being a certain size: with something stretchy and designed to be expandable, whose size is ever changing, it doesn't make sense to consider that thing as having a static size at all.
Think about it like a pair of tights you just took out of the dryer. They're very stretchy, but before you put them on, the legs of them look very tiny and tight, as there isn't anything inside them and like nothing large could fit into them. If someone thin legs put them on, they'll stretch to fit right around those legs. If someone with a thicker leg puts them on, they'll stretch to fit that leg, too. If you take a basketball and put it inside, they'll stretch around that, too. And after any given size of leg was put in, if we toss them back in the wash, when they're done, they're going to be that constricted size again that'll stretch to accommodate what's put inside.
(And if you're going to go to the place that says, "But wait: after a bunch of wears, tights get less stretchy and get kind of saggy! That means vaginas CAN wear out that same way, right?" Don't bother. Tights and vaginas are different in that way, because vaginas are not made out of nylon or cotton and are built to last and be more way more resilient.)
By all means, some things do impact how stretchy and snap-back the vaginal walls or opening are....Age can make a difference, as can general health, hormonal balances (estrogen plays a big part in vaginal elasticity, which is why menopause will often impact women's comfort with intercourse and other vaginal sex, and also why at certain times of the fertility cycle when estrogen levels are lower, intercourse doesn't always feel as good or as comfortable as it does at other times when estrogen levels are higher)...
I'd not put a lot of stock in what a partner says about what your v****a feels like to them... especially if they're circumcised... It's often mentioned by sexologists that male perceptions of vaginal size have more to do with lubrication levels than anything else: a less lubricated v****a tends to feel more "tight" due to more friction, while an adequately or very lubricated v****a can feel "looser," because of less friction. So, if you're not also using lube from the start, adding more as needed, or you're just naturally drier during sex than his other partners were, that may be some of the difference he is perceiving.
...When we anticipate pain or discomfort -- which of course, you're going to do if you've been experiencing it persistently -- we're way more likely to have it happen...." http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/how_can_vaginas_not_vary_much_in_size_for_real
"....Are you highly aroused well BEFORE any sort of vaginal entry begins?...If you're a young, healthy person without any medical conditions which can alter how your sexual response system system works, when you're very aroused...Your v****a will usually naturally lubricate, sometimes profoundly (though at some times in your monthly cycle, that may be more or less) so that you feel "wet." ...
...Do you really WANT to be having intercourse/manual sex or any sort of sex? That might sound silly, but it's important to consider every time you have sex: do you want to have intercourse or other vaginal sex for YOUR pleasure and satisfaction as much as your partners? Do you find yourself attempting intercourse or manual sex with a partner when you suspect or know you aren't aroused or interested, maybe because you know it'll get them to stop nagging you or placate them? If so, in a word, knock it off....
Are you using lubricant as needed? Lube can't replace arousal, mind you: it can't loosen the vaginal canal and opening the way that arousal can. But when you are already there, and things don't feel very slippery, it can be a big help. When using condoms and barriers, it's essential, not just to keep the barrier from tearing, but because often our own natural lube isn't enough when a barrier is added. Too, if you're also using hormonal contraceptives, often one of the side effects is an increase in vaginal dryness. During certain times of the fertility cycle as well (for those who are not using the pill, the patch or other hormonal methods), cervical mucus is thicker, which can make things more sticky and less slippery. Friction is part of what makes any kind of vaginal stimulus -- like intercourse or manual sex -- feel good, but too much friction causes discomfort. using plenty of latex-safe, water-based lube helps you strike the right balance....
Not sure if you're really highly aroused or if that's an issue? Try having an orgasm BEFORE attempting sexual intercourse or manual sex. In other words, engage in other sexual activities with your partner which bring you to orgasm first, then right afterward, try vaginal entry.....
BE VERBAL AND CLEAR when you're not feeling good. Don't fake pleasure or say something feels okay when it doesn't, and don't just hope things will improve magically on their own. Neither you nor your partner are going to be able to figure out what DOES feel good, and isn't painful, if you're not communicating freely and clearly....." http://www.scarleteen.com/article/pink/from_ow_to_wow_demystifying_painful_intercourse
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|