[PRP] Is that all you have to say? ( Slven x Ghost. )

[Cheekiebirdiee]

Returning to the ship was troublesome in its own way, but now that they were back. Slven placed the book he had been reading on his desk and folded his hands, chin resting against them. "Ghost.." The name rolled off his tongue bitterly yet fondly, the longer he was back the more he thought about what had happened. How Ghost had lied to him given he had been under the impression children could not leave not that they just couldn't leave on their own, how he had let the children go. These thoughts, these...useless feelings of annoyance for Ghost not taking him out in the past coupled with the strange look that was in Ghost eyes that day which hadn't escaped Slven nor did his comment of Slven being childishly jealous. Childishly, prove himself as an adult in mind not just in body ? Slven was an adult. Ghost should know this, did he not see how further skilled Slven's mind was now? Slven rubbed at the bridge of his nose, he was dabbling in psychic things now...surely. Slven paused blinking in surprise when a rather odd thought struck him, had Ghost simply not noticed him now that he wasn't a child to awaken and introduce into the world or was he simply trying to hurt Slven?

Why was this bothering him so much?

Slven snorted as his temper boiled within while he recalled the previous events that led to this moment. To this oddness inside of him, the feeling of being hurt like this was so alien the raven didn't know how to place it. Jealous just what had he meant by that? Jealous of the children getting to go out....why wouldn't he be? Slven frowned down to his book and looked towards the ceiling of his room. Jealous of Ghost giving into those children...but not him? The ravens eyes narrowed on the ceiling before quickly finding their way level again as he rose from the chair he had been sitting in to pace across his room to his door. Jealous. He wasn't jealous he told himself, pride and arrogance wouldn't allow him to think otherwise.

Slven scowled freely alone in his room at the mounting confusion his own thoughts were creating.

Why did Ghost have to behave this way? Why couldn't he just have taken Slven outside? It was hard to think about punishing him as opposed to how easy it had been to think of punishing Empyrean when he was younger. Though the more he thought about Ghost giving a right he had so selfishly kept from Slven to the other children. It got easier. Easier and more frustrating. Ghost whom he had awoken to, whom he watched day in and out with hidden admiration for someone so warm. To not at all be. To be so selfish how could he be as warm as Slven had thought him. Wasn't it all just a facade? Part of Ghost's appeal? To wake the children up and hug them, greet them so kindly and tell them this world was theirs? Slven clenched his fist remembering the day he first saw Ghost, Utopia...his brother.

The day he felt happy to be embraced by Ghost, to be talked to like he was special. Like. Then Ghost...Then he dare...he dared keeping the thing Slven wanted most from him all this while only to so... to so easily allow- his furious muddled thoughts were interrupted when a white suit clad fist hit the wall of his room hard enough to create an echo throughout and bruise his knuckles. Looking to his aching hand he snorted. This was why things like emotion were dangerous disadvantages, Slven thought shaking his head.

Slven's temper was become more erratic and he knew it.

Straightening himself out again the raven headed genome peered out of his door. His amber eyes had within moments chilled from the heated rage they held when striking the wall to that of emotionless as he moved from the room and towards the bridge of the ship where he often spotted Ghost. On his way to find the operator and talk. Talk. Just talk Slven was an adult, he could speak calmly to the operator talk to him, scold him. Slven trailed silently towards his destination his mind flickering from the words he planned on saying to Ghost to the places he knew he could find the operator.

Yes, among the many things Slven tended to observe Ghost was one, which allowed him to easily pull places that the operator might be. "Mother...can you locate The Operator for me.." Called the raven calmly, lowly, holding back the anger that was raising yet again. Knowing Mother could hear him and perhaps lessen the time it would take to find Ghost. A part of him mused in how Ghost would react, if Ghost could so easily call Slven childish now, or tell him to prove himself as an adult considering he had made it back from the mission and even with his father?
 

[Sen Cross]

After the recent events, Ghost had retired to his quarters to think. There was not much more he could do but leave Aren in Alerys hands for now. The two children and the search party had returned safely and were currently resting, what brought him to another thing that he would have to face soon.
Slven.

He sighed. Of course Slven was angry and was currently viewing the whole situation in a quite wrong light. The boy had one volatile temper ... and it might have been wrong to have sheltered him so much as a child. But as Operator, he really didn't have any other choice. Not after he had lost track of Casshern already. However that had happened ... the fact that neither he nor mother knew and the boy seemed to have simply disappeared off of the face of the planet was bothering him. A lot.

Ghost was pulled out of his thoughts as Mother informed him that Slven was looking for him. Well, that solved the question as to how he best approached the youth. "Tell him I'll be waiting for him here." He let her know and leaded back in his chair with another sigh.
There was nothing more he could do than to hope talking to Slven would make him understand ... that Slven was indeed the aduld he claimed to be so that he could understand. He only hoped he would manage to find the right words.
Closing his eyes, he waited for Slven to arrive.  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

When Mother spoke to him again it was to inform him of Ghost's location. In his quarters, Slven had to pause for a moment to recall where exactly Ghost's quarters were since it wasn't exactly a place he frequented. Luckily he didn't have to think to hard, like a good Mother he was informed Ghost's room was located on deck one past the growth chambers a little ways. Stepping from the elevator ambers rolled over the first deck curiously before his feet carried him to Ghost's door.

"...." Staring silently for a moment the raven sighed. A hint of tiredness seeping into the sigh as he lifted his hand to give three distinctly loud knocks announcing his presence to the operator on the other side of the door. Tired and no longer just simply sore from carrying his father but achy from the hit to the wall as well, needless to say he would need rest soon. But for now his focus was on Ghost. Getting Ghost to admit he was wrong, an apology? Was that what he wanted? Slven shook off his thoughts and stepped back from the door, waiting.

Folding his arms behind his back and tilting his head slightly to the side as he awaited Ghost to allow him entrance into the room or come out to greet him, shutting his eyes as he waited in the rather cold pose.  

[Sen Cross]

Ghost's head snapped up at the knock on his door, rising to his feet. "Come in, the door's open."

He didn't know what to expect, honestly. What was it that Slven wanted to hear from him? What was he supposed to say?
Ghost knew that he wasn't exactly a social kind of person. He never had to be.  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

"Come in, the door's open." There it was and it was all he needed to step forward again and open the door. Entering slowly into Ghost's chambers curiosity got the better of the raven and he allowed himself to peer around the room taking in its contents before coming to a rest on Ghost. A small almost snort sounded when Slven's eyes came to the violet eyes of the operator. Knowing it only polite for greetings before hand, adults were civil after all Slven gently took a step back closing the door behind him and staring forward to Ghost as he shut them into the room together.

Silence filled the room before he broke it with a murmured greeting of, " greetings Operator...you look well.." Slven rolled his shoulders slightly before leaning back against the door, blocking it from entrance or exit and continuing, "I would like to inquire about stealing a few moments of your time...." oh formalities he would do Ghost just like any other, led them to him with words. Though he was asking, the way he guarded the door well it was clear the 'inquire' was more of a demand. "Though I'm sure you must realize why I here..." Surely you are not so dense his eyes read before flickering back to the emotionless gaze he had entered with.  

[Sen Cross]

A nod, crossing his arms behind his back in a quite familiar manner. He hated it, the distance that had crept between them from just one single misunderstanding ... mistake ... however you would want to put it. But this talk was inevitable and if he wanted to sort it out he had to take the first step. He was, after all, the adult of the two of them.
"Of course. I believed you would come looking for me after you got some rest, but either way you are welcome to do so any time." He took Slvens position at the door with a light raise of one brow, gesturing to one of the comfortable seats. "There is no need to keep standing. I think if we are going to talk for a while, you might want to sit down. You look exhausted."
Not that he wouldn't, after a mission like that, and with so much emotional turmoil the youth was no doubt facing right now.
"I promised you we would talk upon your return. And I will answer your questions, as I said I would."  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

Rest. Slven hadn't really thought he needed at the moment besides his mind had been far to restless to allow it, "yes well rest only comes when its allowed..." He raises a slightly suspicious brow and blinks at Ghost offer to come to him any time. Unable to help but think its just clever words like before when Ghost - drawing in a breath to calm his thoughts he nodded, attempting to keep his temper down for now"I might take you up more often then..Dear Operator. " His tone had slipped a moment into almost a tease before heading back to its typical.

Keeping his hands behind his back mostly for comfort he eyed the seats. A smirk threatening to pull at his lips before a sigh escaped and he moved to sit down in the offered seat. His point was across after all, Ghost and he were talking why not be comfortable? Just..hopefully the seat wasn't to comfortable. Sitting down he moved his hands to rest on the arms of the chair. The hand that had just moments before hit his wall was red at the knuckles and looked as if it had swelled slightly but he showed no signs of really noticing, though it did ache.

"I promised you we would talk upon your return. And I will answer your questions, as I said I would."

Silently the raven let his eyes flicker over each feature of Ghost face, trying to find any hidden body language hints. Anything. Sitting back and spreading his legs a bit though keeping mostly straight he got comfortable in the seat before opening his mouth again. "A promise to me is only good if kept." In other words if the person that says it actually holds true, Slven wasn't one to trust anyones words, though admittingly before this...he would of likely trusted Ghost's. Cutting to the chase he opens the conversation, "Why did you let the children accompany the search party? You see I'm rather troubled with this considering I was under the impression children were not allowed to be outside of the dome." Slven leaned up in the seat slightly keeping his gaze casual and calm on Ghost but looking in him the eye as he led him in.  

[Sen Cross]

Ghost nodded, taking a seat opposide Slven. A small, yet somehow sad smile formed on his lips.
"Yes, that. I figured that it ... upsets you." Of course it did. Slven was just that kind of person, and Ghost couldn't really be upset with him for a reason like that. "And I have to apologize. Not for lying, as you were so quick to assume - for it is true that children are not allowed outside the dome on their own - but for keeping that one detail from you that they could indeed leave alongside an adult." He sighed. "However ... I'm sure you recall that by the time you first wished to leave the dome, there was no adult around but myself. I didn't think it would do you any good to know that you could leave should I accompany you, only to have me refuse."
He rubbed the bridge of his nose, a small frown forming on his forehead. Oh, how to best put this into words, now?
"I want you to know that I would not refuse you out of spite, and I understand your wish for this ... freedom. Adventure. More than you might be aware. As Operator, this ship is my home as well as my prison. I cannot leave. If I would, Mother would be without protection and the dome would fall."
Ghost stayed silent for a few moments, allowing his words to sink in. Of course Slven would be aware at least to a portion of the Operators responsibility, but never of the whole gravity of it. How could he, anyway?
"As for not telling you later, when the first of you children was old enough to leave ... well, you may call me selfish if you wish to, but I'm not sorry for sheltering you. Especially after your brother just ... vanished. You are special, Slven. To me, to all of us. Until we found your father, I was sure you would one day lead this colony. Maybe you'll still be our leader, one day. I couldn't just let you walk out on your own and risk loosing you as well."
He had promised, after all. To protect Aren's children. And he had failed with Casshern. He wouldn't .... couldn't fail with Slven, too. And yes, he had selfish reasons. The youth could hate him for it, but maybe he would understand some day.  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

The smile was nothing note worthy as from what he remembered of Ghost his features tended to look either worried or sad most of the time. True the position he was in was hard, Slven did not doubt this but with the way it was brought up he had to assume Ghost was trying to get his pity? To guilt him into being less angry with the other man? Something... Slven's brows furrowed slightly for a moment expressing his confusion for the situation before the signature cold look formed over his face. Ghost had been the only adult that Slven remembered during that time but, but still. Narrowing his eyes slightly he interjected," you could have at least allowed me a single step outside or did you think I would run away as well? I'm was never that big of a child and I'm certainly not now, protection is something you should save for those who need it. " The anger was clear in his voice, he wasn't at all happy with Ghost or his so called apology. He knew and understood the situation but just a step, just knowing that some other adult when they arrived could have... Just the chance, the trust?

That was it...why hadn't Ghost trusted him? He might of been a child but Slven had never been particularly destructive or flaky? He trained daily and even studied when younger. The more he thought on the matter the more it started to boil his blood, the injured hand from the wall curled its fingers tight around the chair arm before he leaned over said arm to get a little closer to the Operator. While he understood Ghost all to well, he was far more inclined to feel wounded by him than sympathetic it was just the kind of person he was.

"Your not sorry? ...Special.." Slven felt a tightening in his chest that only brought more anger, however he didn't fail to calm it from his tone. Slven chuckled lowly and tipped his head closer to Ghost the hand he wasn't leaning on chanced a touch to the Operator's smooth cheek caressing it with a large cold palm, "but not special enough to be allowed one simple joy.. For just the chance to be trusted ? It's good to hear how little you think of me Ghost." Slven was unable to help the touch a part of him needed to feel the warmth he remembered from awakening and knew it would be the last time he likely got to touch Ghost. A look of disgust passed through his amber eyes as he pulled back and rose from the chair commenting harshly as his anger took over, "as for that man and this so called colony...I want nothing to do with either. Why should I ? Since I don't intend to stay in such a place with people whom neither trust me but make things more difficult for me. Do you realize what a burden it would have been if more than that man was injured so badly or if the female adult with them would have collapsed? The children would not be capable of carrying an adult, they were barely capable at all not to mention the back-sass I was given. To lead doesn't one need respect and competence from the followers? How would you propose I gain respect being treated like a child and having my word overruled in front of those I should be above?" Slven gives a glance down to Ghost before shaking his head though the motion of his shake caused him to get a little dizzy fatigue was finally demanding to be let in on him.

"...." Slven moved a hand back to catch on the wall of Ghost room as his knees threatened to buckle under him. A scowl and wince forming as he done so considering his injured hand had been the one he used to catch himself and well...looking like this in front of - it was more than degrading and embarrassing considering he just lashed out about not needing to be protected. .helped.  

[Sen Cross]

"You still think my reasoning was that I don't trust you ..." This was why he never choose to be a parent. He didn't know how to put his thoughts into words or to explain them.
He had expected ... what? That Slven would understand him? No, not really, had he? "I don't know if you expect me to be perfect, but I'm not. I never applied for this positon, I got it because there was no other choice."
The youths words hurt, more than he was willing to accept. Sentiment ... that's what happened if you try to get close to someone, care about someone ... maybe he shouldn't have tried at all. But it was too late to make it undone, now. His soul had already latched onto something - someone - who would undoubtedly tear it apart.
As Slven got up from his seat, no doubt to leave, he closed his eyes as the hurt in them was way to visible and turned his back to the other.
"If you want nothing to do with us ... that's your choice. I will not force you to stay."  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

Anger still on and in full force he snapped at the question, "and if its not that? Surely you can offer a better explanation after all you're an adult. " Slven's amber eyes grew heavy his lids lowered giving him a slightly dazed appearance and lessening the heat he had created. Another chuckle slipped past his lips this one more mocking considering the almost hypocritical words of the Operator. He wasn't expected to be perfect and yet Ghost seemed to expect this of him, " isn't it the same for you? " What did Ghost expect from him, to bring up thoughts of him being a leader. Clearly he expected more of Slven clearly what he was now, " clearly I'm not good enough right? But that's not important now that you have him.." Perhaps it was a childish thing to say but he couldn't help it. The fact that Ghost continued to bring up his father coupled with the small happy sigh he heard the moment Ghost voice came over the communicator from his father annoyed him. Annoyed him much more than the whole cause of this conversation. Why well he wasn't sure himself but that wasn't here nor now so he pushed the strange annoyance aside.

Standing up he continued to allow himself to argue, scold the Operator even as he felt himself slump a little towards the chair again. Slven glared as best he could with his eyes closing on Ghost back hearing his words and frowning in his sleepy state realizing he hadn't meant to be so harsh with Ghost. He was just to angry and prideful to take it back. He did want to leave if for expanding his knowledge and quenching his curiosity of the outside but there were things, the things that had kept him this long. But Casshern was gone..and Ghost well had he not just said he wouldn't stop him? "As where before you did.." He commented coldly, wanting to leave but for the moment unable as his eyes had shut and he couldn't seem to get them to open. Slven was exhausted in many sense of the word, slowly he pushed himself from the wall and willed his eyes to open. Staring at Ghost back as he stood a little wobbly from his current state, "What I want seems not to matter." An arrogant snort sounded. "Goodbye..Ghost" Slven announced on a soft exhale, clearly giving away how tired he really was, raven locks dipped around his face to shadow his features. Turning slowly he started towards the door  

[Sen Cross]

Ghosts hands clenched to fists at his side, brows knitting into a deep frown. He couldn't let it end like this, could he? Slven was right, he was the adult. But what was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to do this?
He turned, watching Slvens back now as the youth approached the closed door, hesitating for just a moment longer. The boy looked so very tired ... why hadn't he noticed it before? Of course, Slven had hidden it with his stubborn pride ... the same trait that wouldn't allow him to relent.. and then, Ghost knew that this was a now-or-never situation, that his reaction in this moment might be so very very important in the future, for both of them. Just forget rational thoughts for a moment.
"Wait ..." He had crossed the small room before the word had left his lips entirely. Throwing all caution into the wind lest Slven would hate him even more later, well, he really didn't have anything more to loose ... he wrapped his arms around the youths shoulders in a fierce, yet gentle hug. "I'm sorry I made you feel like I expected you to be perfect. I really am. You don't have to be perfect. Yes, I expect much of you, because I trust you to grow into someone who can be a leader, a guide to those that will follow. And yes, I'm comparing you to your father, but please understand, I have known him for many centuries, many human lifetimes he has been like a father for me, too. And he is very important to me. But you ..." He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. "You mean so much more to me already. I know it was unfair, but I just couldn't risk to loose you. It's got nothing to do with trust, just with me being an overbearing mother hen. And I guess it's only fair to apologize, even though I would do it again. I didn't realize I would hurt your feelings that much. I'm really, really sorry for that."  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

"Wait. "

The call sounded and it paused Slven for just a minute, a pause he had not willed and was honestly disgusted with himself for giving. Why? He questioned himself and Ghost mentally, ambers widening in slight shock as he felt two warm arms wrapped around him. It had been a long time since another genome touched him, long enough for this to be the second hug he had ever received in his life and it was even..by the same person.

Though this hug felt different from the first. It was much more desperate feeling..much more fierce. Slven listen if only because he couldn't manage to pull from Ghost due mostly to exhaustion or so he told himself.. repeatedly. His features softened somewhat at the realization. Like a father to Ghost, so that was it then. Slven relaxed his shoulders from the stiff position they had taken up as soon as Ghost had his arms around them.

A deep startling and strange confusion set in the more Ghost spoke, an urge built in him as he turned in the others hold to face him and lessen their distance even more. What was this? Slven questioned himself peering down through his lashes at the lavender haired operator. The exhausted stated of the ravens mind wasn't helping him make better sense of the situation and as such he simply fell into the first thought he had, had the moment he awoke with his brother and Ghost into this new world and that was, 'mine.' He didn't speak only rose a hand up between them to touch Ghost cheek nudging up it to get a better look at him.

A smirk spread the ravens lips as he stared down with tired eyes "...I no longer need two mothers." The statement was soft but firm, his tone deeper than normal thanks to his state. Slven couldn't help but let his anger for Ghost flee at the apology and the way that the operator hugged to him so desperately. Though all was forgotten, there was a point he still needed to get across to the operator. One Ghost needed to understand and that was that he was grown now perhaps he was jealous and childish at times but he was an adult and had adult instincts and thoughts. With a stroke of his thumb over Ghost cheek he gave the operator a rare sight by flashing him a smile though looked from his eyes, "I suppose.. I may have overreacted. " There it was. As good as an apology anyone would ever get from him and highly likely the only one he would ever give. As quick as the moment came he intended to break it by letting his hand slip from Ghost cheek, after all sleep was calling and he had ignored it long enough.

Besides Ghost wasn't going anywhere...he would always be here it was his job right? Slven was about to step back from the other genome.  

[Sen Cross]

Ghost felt a shudder run down his spine as Slven touched his cheek, and almost felt pained as the moment passed. Yes, he thought, this was no longer the small child that had taken in the world with eagerness for the first time. This was an adult, young but still grown and old enough to fend for himself if need be. He had proved that, after all.
"You are right." He said, releasing the younger man from his embrace and placing his hands on his shoulders. "You've grown. And you've proved so. You brought them home safely."
A bright, honest smile found it's way onto the Operators face. A rare one ever since the second war began. "I'm proud of you, Slven. Very proud."
It was difficult, and confusing, dealing with Slven. He felt drawn to him, more so than he had with any comrade or friend before, more so than he felt towards Aren. He didn't understand why, but he was determined to find out some time soon. But not now.
"You look exhausted. Go get some rest, we can talk more tomorrow, if you wish."  

[Cheekiebirdiee]

Silently the raven stood, staring and listening to the praise that was long overdue from Ghost in his own personal opinion. A smirk spread his lips as Ghost said he was proud. It wasn't only that but being recognized as an adult that held the smirk in place. Slven felt an odd itch to touch Ghost again, to gain his warmth when the lavender haired male smiled. That smile wasn't something Slven believed he had ever seen grace the operators features before. Was it...

Just for him? Regardless it was...flattering on the other.

Amber eyes narrowed and his lips curved hard at the ends for a wider, hungry looking grin to the other. Perhaps there was something to this strangeness after all, then again he was likely to tired to properly assess the situation. Exhaustion getting the better of him Slven backed up towards the door with a nod for the operators request of him getting some sleep. Stepping out as the door opened he turned to glance back at Ghost, face now back into its signature expressionless stare, he opened his mouth, "if you want to talk you know where to find me..." Walking off he stretched his arms above his head.

Before heading back to his room however, he managed to pass near the infirmary though didn't go inside.