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Do your OC's have a journal? |
Yes =3 |
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18% |
[ 2 ] |
No =( |
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27% |
[ 3 ] |
Some of them do. =D |
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27% |
[ 3 ] |
GOLDZ 8D |
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27% |
[ 3 ] |
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Total Votes : 11 |
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Posted: Sat May 30, 2009 9:04 pm
 A black, leather bound book lies open on your desk. Enscripted on the cover it reads, Forgotten Memories.
Ok, so I thought this was a cool idea and ran it by Enmity. ^^ Which he agreed! This is a place where your character, whomever it is, can write about their true feelings. This is a diary given to your rp characters in order to write down all the memories they have, whether it be in the fourm, or outside of it.
This is a diary, journal, and/or notebook if I haven't been clear, for your charries! ^^ I'm not particularly good at explaining things so I shall do my best! First off, this is for your role play characters. Just like any of us have journals that we write down our life and feelings in, this is one for your characters. (Boy am I redundant. x.x)
Feeling large amounts of unexplainable rage because of some jerk? Write it out in your diary! Just don't forget to put who you are, and what role play you're coming from. Also! If any of your characters feel like writing in their journal and they're not in a current rp, or if they have experienced something outside of the guild (Enmity and Meenchi) they can write it here too! Just be sure to write something indicating that they're not in an rp.
Hope you enjoy! And if there are any questions, you may ask. ^^ Again, I'm not the best at explaining things.
P.S. You can actually make your journal look how you please. ^^
Table of Contents: Intro Rules Format Q&A Reserved
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Posted: Sat May 30, 2009 9:08 pm
 1. Follow all Guild ruls and Gaia rules. Duh. AND be respectful of others.
2. Swearing, it happens. Just don't do it every other word.
3. Fill out the character and location. We all need to know who and where they are. (See below and first post.)
4. Have fun.
5. I can kick you out. (Though I doubt it. You're supposed to be having fun!)
6. No spam, and all that jazz.
7. Don't get offended easily. These ARE characters writing THEIR feelings and stuff. So, no individual is personally attacking you or your beliefs.
9. I ate eight.
10. You all should know the drill by now. Pretty much the same rules as everywhere else. Oh, and I can add more if I deem necessary.
11. Literacy is still a go. (Yeah, yeah, we all make mistakes, that's fine. ^^) However, 'short hand' may be used. Such as if your character is writing and wants to use & instead of writing and, that's fine. No chatspeak, I doubt your character would use it when writing in a journal anyways...however I could be wrong. Deal. And if 'short hand' is used, make sure it's something that is universal so we won't be confused. Trust me..I get confused a lot.
NOTE: You obviously don't need to send any applications or stuffs. Your posts can be whatever length. HOWEVER! Please refrain from posts that are just one line. T-T It will make me sad. Love you guys!
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Posted: Sat May 30, 2009 9:09 pm
This is an example on how it should look.Kohaku Outside Dear Diary,
My user is just using my name as an example. There is no way I will actually be using this. EVER. Now I will use x's to fill up some space. Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Signed, Kohaku FORMAT You do not have to follow this exact outline, but please do something along the lines of it. I give you all full creativity rights. ^^ [align=left][b][size=16][color=COLOR HERE](Characters Name)[/color][/size][/b] [i][size=14][color=COLOR HERE][u]Role Play they are in or if not please say so.[/u][/color][/size][/i][/align]
[size=10][align=left]Dear Diary,[/align] [align=center](TYPE STUFF HERE)[/align] [align=right]Signed, (Whoever)[/align][/size]
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Posted: Sat May 30, 2009 9:10 pm
Q's and A's None yet. But if you do have questions you may ask!
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Posted: Sat May 30, 2009 10:08 pm
((Reserved for future purposes...if needed))
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Posted: Sun May 31, 2009 6:09 pm
5+31+09 ++Ezekiel++ InRealLife___________________________________________________________________[♥] My Little Kandi Raver Dear Diary,
I did something completely jerkish today, not that I could help it. For once I feel bad for being...to put it without using profanity, a**. Well, so much for not using profanity. Though, I guess it was better than what I was thinking. -sigh-
Today was going fine...Yumi was doing her usual things...working on some post for Sake's role play. I decided I was going to go out tonight and rave, like usual...but...then it happened. Apparently Blade and Hiro aren't doing exactly well on account Blade decided to hit on Yumi. Not a bright idea I might add.
To make things shorter I'll just get to the jist. Hiro asked me if Blade did stuff like that at the club. Which of course I would know. I go out with him regularly. Not like a date, but like two friends. There's no use in lying to someone like Hiro...he's a human lie detector. So, you can imagine I told the truth.
In some ways I wish I hadn't said anything. I feel terrible. And while it's Blade's own damn fault Hiro is pissed and not talking to him...I think I fed the flame. In fact, I know I did. But I'm bitter all the time, and keep my feelings, words, everything locked away. I would never have the gutts to express this to Blade. He'd probably just laugh and poke fun.
I hope he can forgive me, after all it couldn't have been helped. I only wish they could be on good terms. I want the best for Blade...as long as he's happy, I'm happy. That's how it works when it comes to friends. And he is my best friend. Sometimes my one and only friend. Don't get me wrong...I pick on him like crazy and make jokes, but still...I do care.
I believe that's it from my fuzzy mind and dreading heart. Besides... there's only one way it could get worse. Which I hope their relationship doesn't reach those depths. Broken hearts just aren't fun to deal with.
Signed,
Your Spiky-haired Friend
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Posted: Sun May 31, 2009 7:29 pm
(Ely Hatter Monteblanc) MMF, Serum, WAR.
Dear Diary, (Today...was another long day. But I'm not complaining. :3
So, Weeks slept till five, because I guess she's just the biggest bum... (I'm kidding <3) Anyway!
She slept until five, but I was up by...noon? Not much better, I guess, but I was out at Nacht all night before dancing like an idiot... Ooh, I still feel silly for it, but...
It was fun.
Most of the people recognized me as the normal hostess, so it wasn't hard to talk to them, really. It was...really nice. I always get so weird around new people, but when they alreayd know me, it's not so bad. :3
Sky's still gone. Sadface. And I know he's busy...but...I still wish I could talk to him. Tell him Hi, or something. It's so quiet around here with him gone. o.o But I won't bother him. He'll be home...eventually.
In the meantime...I have to find other things to do. I've got work, martial arts lessons, and I have to get ready for France with Jaime and Kalvaan...
I .hate. Flying.
But at least it'll be something to do besides work and practice. :3 Plus, I doubt Kal and Jaime will try anything funny if we stay with Kal's parents. Kalvaan's insanely loud when he's with Jaime at night...
Which is why I was awake all night the other night, trying to watch a movie so that I could drown out the sound of Kal...
Oh...
Just...
Ugh. If only I had somewhere else to stay while they did that... BUT WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO LEAVE? I'm the one here all the time to begin with. >n< Honestly! Can't they go somewhere else and make crazy noises?
Mmm... Eventually...I'll probably either go sleep at Kal's place or something. They're too noisy for me.
o.o;;
Anyways... This is getting boring... I only wrote in this because I needed something else to do. But I'm bored now so...time to go bug Jaime. ;3)
Signed, (Ely)
(Sydae...rnaer eilyraes jhyl pae. Sher Ai't byr tystalol. :3
Mai, Weeks maer sor tholi, shaelari Ai ker mi'm ber si shondraer shes... (Ai't codol <3) Eileirdae!
Mi maer ialor tholi, sher Ai shar iar shia...lail? Byr tes shaeraes, Ai ker, sher Ai shar or eir Bas eir bol shaerysi palol jhoji eil aidor... On, Ai mor thaer molia thys air, sher...
Air shar thel.
Tyr os si vaedi vaelyndrojaer ti eir si bysar cyraer, mai air shar's cas sai sar sai saes vaelia. Air shar... siria boli. Ai eilar kaer mai shaes eisyl baern vaedi, sher shael si eilaedia cyrn ti, air'm byr mai shar. :3
Mia'm mor kyli. Marthali. Eil Ai cyrn ci'm sheria...riar...Ai mor shor Ai tyr sar sai cos. Saer cos Cai, os mystaerol. Air'm mai cer eisyl caesi shor cos kyli. o.o Sher Ai shyl's shyraes cos. Ci'jh shi cysti...ililiaria.
Ail si taelosti...Ai cali sai thol oraes sol sai pai. Ai'bi kyr shys, tasor eis jhaeryl, eil Ai cali sai kaer vaedia thys France shor Jaime eil Kalvaan...
Ai .naeri. Theil.
Sher eir jhaer air'jh shi mystaerol sai pai shaerodaer shys eil valoli. :3 Ver, Ai pyr Car eil Jaime shor sia eileirol thelia ais shi mae shor Car'm vasael. Kalvaan's ailalaelia jhyr shael ci'm shor Jaim eir bol...
On...
Ber...
Ial. Ais olia Ai car mystaerdaesi sai mae sholi si por sar... ShER Shla MYR Ai CALI SAi JhAeLI? Ai't si oli caesi eir si sosti sai shaendrol shor. >n< Cylaeria! Tal's si kai mystaerdaesi aeli eil taji tajia byraer?
T...Aelaelelia...Ai'jh vyrdardia aeraes kai maer eir Kal's vali os mystaerol. Si'vi sai byria thys ti.
o.o;;
Eileirdar... Sor air kaerol shysol...Ai olia shyri ail sor shaelari Ai baedaer mystaerol aeli sai pai. Sher Ai't shysaer byrn mai...raisi sai kai shel Jaime. ;3)
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Posted: Sat Jun 06, 2009 11:10 pm
Blade IRL 3
Dear Diary,
I‘ve never really been one to write in a journal, so this will probably be the shortest thing you ever see. Le sigh.
I‘m nearly broken hearted and completely in tears. I may have lost the only man I‘ve ever loved in my life. He ran off several days ago and has still yet to come home. I have a slight problem. I‘m a flirt. I flirt all the time. I can‘t help it. It is what makes me “me.” It‘s too late to turn back the hands of time and fix the problem, but everyone here hates me. They blame me for chasing him off.
I suppose it really is my fault. He may never come home, and not even his best friend knows where he is. I miss him thoroughly, yet all the while a question myself.
Do I really love him?
If I did really love him would I flirt with so many people?
It‘s like Kohaku in basically any roleplay he‘s in. He‘s always flirting with everyone else no matter how much it hurts Saké. Yes, Kohaku I knew Yumi said she was going to read this, and she‘ll probably say something about this portion. I only refer to when they have you love Sakura in the roleplays they use you in.
Anyway, I now doubt, despite what I said earlier, that I might not truly and fully love him the way he loves me. It has been a long time since he trusted a guy again, and here I am hurting him once more. I‘m a terrible person. I deserve nothing. No friends, no love, no family. Perhaps if I disappear he‘ll return, and then everyone will be happy again.
I don‘t know what to do. I know at least two people would hate me if I disappeared. I just don‘t know what to do. Le sigh.
Signed, Blade
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Posted: Fri Jun 12, 2009 3:41 pm
Kohaku Real Life 6-12-09 4:26AM All right, I know I said I'd never use this, but whatever.
I'm stressed, annoyed, you name it.
Things over here have gotten to the point to where it's even pissing me off. This whole ordeal between Hiro and Blade, it’s nuts. (So, I could’ve used better terminology.)
Anyway, we all know Blade is a flirt. Ja, so what? It’s in his nature. It’s not like he can stop at the drop of a hat. Believe me, I know. Flirting is one thing; actually acting on it is another. He’s flirtatious, so sue him.
Granted I’m not sticking up for the guy. I don’t like him. I’m just stating facts.
But this situation has got my last nerve. I hate Hiro, can’t stand him, however, I respect the guy and what he does. He doesn’t deserve it. He’s been through enough Hell as it is. Ja, ja I wish he would drop dead, but I’d never wish this on him. He’s the only man I HATE enough to kill for. Call me crazy. At least I’m man enough to say he deserves better!
F-censor-
These damn kids and their stupid relationship problems.
If they really love each other then why should it matter? Honestly, if they care enough then who’s to say Blade won’t stop the flirting? It’s a working progress. But heck, what would I know about love? I gave up on that about ten years ago.
I’m down to my last cigarette as I sit here and write this stupid thing. I’m surprised Yumi isn’t crashed yet. All I’ve got to say is:
Once Hiro figures it out, he better get his –censor- a** home. We, all miss him. Which doesn’t include me. Okay, I have to admit, I miss hating him in person.
Oh, and another thing: Whatever happens happens. You’ll always have someone watching your back. Also, it’s ok to be vulnerable, s**t happens.
Signed, Kohaku P.S. No one better take this the wrong way.
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Posted: Thu Jun 18, 2009 6:23 pm
►►►____sнαωηα мαяιαииα σωeη___◦○° In Real LifeDear Diary,
This is so girly, if anyone catches me writing in a diary I have no idea how I will ever live it down. However, I am doing this under Window's suggestion. Bah. I dont know why I would chose to listen to one of his ideas. Besides the fact that he's my boyfriend and.. well because he's my boyfriend and I love him. ... Anyways, under Windows suggestion, here I am, writing in a stupid diary.
I need a smoke.
I know I said I'd quit after I started to date Windows. Him and his stupid asthma. Why did I have to like a guy with asthma? I have no idea. He's just.. Windows. You cant dislike him. Except for those bullies at his old school. If I ever find out who they are, Im going to beat the living hell out of them.
Bahh... I can hear Xandir leaving the house again.. That brother of mine. I cant believe I used to look up to him. Yes! I used to look up to him. I'll never say it out loud, but when you grow up without your parents around cause they're busy touring the world, the only person you can look up to is your oldest brother. Hell, I used to worship Xandir. Then bam, he went to college and all the s**t went down the drain.
I hate this family.
Okay maybe I don't. If I hated my family, I'd probably have moved out a long time ago with Windows. Or he might have talked me out of it, but thats way besides the point.
I think Kori is the only good girl in this family. Except, I still need to talk to sister about her scar. I know it has something to do with her ex boyfriend. I wish I had done more than break a few of his bones and send him to the hospital. If one of my friends hadn't stopped me, he probably would have been sent straight to the morgue.
Dammit. This is my problem. Sometimes, I just let my anger take over my actions. I know I can manage to stay pretty calm sometimes, but when you have siblings like mine, its really hard. They're just all so troubled, it makes me so sad. Not that they ever realize. Nope. Im just the bitchy oldest sister thats always breathing down their neck. I need a chill pill.
But still! Im just trying to be helpful. I cant believe Xandir would say I was the one tearing apart our family! He's such an *blanked out*. Arghh...
Oh great, I can hear Cain drinking next door. Perfect. That little brat. I dont get where the hell he gets his stuff from. I've cleaned up his room, confiscated everything! Ugh... He's not a genius for no reason. He's only sixteen! It breaks my heart to see this. What did Xandir and I do wrong in raising up our little siblings? I blame my parents for never being home.
I guess when you have a total of five siblings, its kind of hard to help all of them. Though my helping doesn't exactly count as helping.. More like pushing them harshly in the right direction. I guess Cain just doesnt get it.
Man.. I really want a smoke now. I have to quit smoking, I mean Im not addicted, but it helps me relax. Oh who am I kidding? Im addicted! God dammit. I dont want to kill Windows just cause Im a stupid smoker. I need to quit and find something else besides smoking and fighting to help me calm down.
Ow! I think I just pulled loose one of my stitches. If I ever see those *blanked out* ever again, I'm going to murder them. I nearly died of freaking blood loss! Thank god someone called the hospital. Man. Close call.
Crap.. I think I'm bleeding again.
I really need a smoke... and maybe some sleeping pills.
Blah,
Shawn
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Posted: Sun Jun 21, 2009 1:31 am
яαιмoи∂e ∂αитe мιckιиℓιиs In real lifeToday is my birthday. Believe it or not. Today sucked. A lot. I dont get what fate has against me, but my birthdays always suck. I wish Kenya was here. I really do miss him. Its been a month since his death but I cant get over him. Here I go again, being the immature b*****d again. I really need to grow up. He's been dead for so long and I still cant forget about him. I'm so pathetic. Okay, maybe not that long, but I should get over my depression.
I can say my bithday was pretty eventful, first thing I get to see is Maria. Just wonderful. I should have known better than to leave my house at all. Sister being as crazy as she is, stuck me in a dress. Absolutely humilating since a lot of my neighbors saw me. At least Lei was nice enough not to laugh at me. I think everyone was pretty much entertained by what they saw. I have no idea how I'm going to show my face outside again.
As the day proceeded, I pretty much found out that Heath is a pretty nice guy. I heard he went home to take care of his mother. A real shame, I wanted to thank him somehow for the birthday present. Its official. Heath was the only one that gave me a present. Very darn strange too since I barely even know the guy. I can pretty much say thats one the of sweeter things people have done for me. The sweetest would have to have been when Kenya surprised me last year by getting us the matching rings with engravings inside. I still keep it, deep in my drawer. I dont think I could bare to look at it today of all days. I have his ring actually... He has my ring, I really should wear it. I dont care if he's dead, I want to keep him with me. I'm not afraid to admit I really did love Kenya.
Anyways, right now I'm in a pedicament... I've been locked out of my apartment. I was an idiot and accidentally locked myself out and cant get back into the house. I'm a genius, I know. I was stuck outside and boy was it windy. I was rather lucky when one of my new neighbors decided to let me back into the building. I cant get into my room, but I was planning to camp out on the roof at first. I was sure I could bare it. At first anyways. My new neighbor, he's really strange. Talal's his name. Strangely enough, he offered to let me stay at his apartment. Which is definitly very suspicious, but he seems like a rather nice guy.
That was until he kissed me! Yes, he kissed me. Okay. I'm not homophobic, I'm gay. However, people dont just come up to strangers and kiss them! Thats just plain weird. I was so shocked it wasn't even funny. No one has just kissed me on random since Kenya died. Well hell, I wouldn't let anyone kiss me but Kenya. Except, Talal just had me so shell shocked, I didn't really react. I guess I have moved on in a small way. In a way I dont really like.
Whats even stranger is when I decided to walk to Alex's house to sleep there, Talal clung to me. He asked me to stay the night with him. Something about me being the first person that was ever nice to him since his parents. I'm not sure whether to believe him or not. I'm not a very nice person. Very definitly not and I know that. Toshi and Yukio has told me that before, even Kenji. However, for me to turn him down was impossible. Talal was nearly crying and clinging onto me. I'm not enough of a b*****d to tell him now. Now, the dangers of staying in some strangers apartment. Boy am I nervous. Not that you'd be able to tell...
Confused,
Dante
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Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 1:15 am
Riu IRL (and WAR) Dear Diary,
That’s it; I’m giving it up. Things have gotten a little too out of hand. Time and time again I let time slip by bottle after bottle, however the consumption was far greater than any other time. The body aches for it’s addiction, while the soul yearns for something more. Don’t ask where that came from. I’m half drunk here. Which, is pretty scary…I never get drunk. I hold my alcohol so well…that I can get by with drinking several in one night and still be able to drive home and get there alive. Not to mention, once it’s down…it usually stays down. Not this time.
Why do I do the things I do? Temptation, it’s a killer. Sometimes I wonder, will this take my life, or will something else happen. Will depression set so far in that…No. I don’t even want to go there.
I’m scared.
It’s taking over. This time, I can feel the damage it’s causing, not just for my health, but how it’s affecting everyone else. I don’t wish to ask for help, I already feel more useless than ever. Worthless. Just like he said. Never amount to anything. I insist on drinking…and while it’s good for a moment…it all just comes fading back into my memory sooner or later. Excuse me one moment.
God, I feel worse than ever. Of course I don’t see why I’m complaining. Ugh! And what’s with this? All the time, it’s always ‘I, me, and my’. People have it far worse, and yet, all my mind can wrap around is what’s going on now and then. Why can’t I ever look to the future? I talk of destiny, and it seems as though I’m destined to fail at mostly everything. The future should be full of goals and happiness. All I get is…nothing.
Why are my thoughts so scattered? Right…drunk. I need to change…for the better. Stop being selfish, stop the addiction, just stop it all.
How are you? Was your day nice? What can I do for you? I miss you.
It should always be you, not I.
I’m throwing the glass down. I dare it to shatter. My life is mine. I have my reason to live.
Signed, Riuichi Ode Theodoric Tamagowa
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Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 9:25 am
Sin MisMatched Fun Dear Journal,
I’ve…never been in a relationship before.
It’s…weird.
It’s…foreign.
It’s…nice.
We’re both…not entirely certain how this whole…relying on each other, giving and taking, and letting people care works. But…we’re getting there. I think.
It is a journey we shall take together…even though I know I am not worthy of this.
Time for work.
- Sin
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Posted: Wed Aug 05, 2009 12:50 am
ѮɭҿɱҿɳʈɪDear Diary,
Today has been an odd day,but I'll just get to the point. I got back from Ireland (which was nice to be back home), and when I got back, some second year twits (idiots) were just talking about their abilities to some first year girls..and they were in my way. I just scared them by showing them a cyclone, and they almost passed out standing up. I wanted to laugh at their reactions, but I just thought I'd go back to catch some sleep before breakfast started...but that was interrupted because mother called me (I forgot to call her back). So I talked to her for a while, and I finally got to get some sleep...the jetlag really got to me.
I'm glad I got the sleep that I got because my little sister woke me up with a text saying I should get to breakfast (she likes to remind me, even though her and Travis are both at the Russian version of Elementi....god knows why,though. Oh yeah. They didn't feel like coming to America for some reason...but it's nice. I get my own space away from the twins). So while I going to breakfast, I saw this huge gaping mold on the door of the double doors; there was melted hot ooze everywhere. I assumed it was a fire elemental because no other elemental kid could do that unless they had a blow torch..even then, it wouldn't do that much.
After I got breakfast, I went to sit down at a circle table, which had a lovely sight of the sky outside (considering it was partly cloudy...). I went into my own little world then. It was nice because I thought of home again, and I blocked out the thoughts of what everybody else around me was saying. Yet in the next minute, it was very odd because the room started to warm up a little more than usual. It hit me, and snapped me out of my 'little daydream'. But there was this dishy (attractive) looking fifth elemental (as far as I know) that sat at my table, so it wasn't so bad...yet I knew that he was probably the fire elemental that made the gaping ooze from earlier, so it was a bit intimidating to talk to him.
But I felt like a twit talking to Darrel. I mean, my cyclones and whirlwinds do get out of control with a certain emotion..but it was like he was looking for some kind of other answer than what I gave to him. I have a feeling that he saw my little 'display' from earlier (god, I can't wait until I'm done speaking...urghh). But then some fourth year named Adalae, who's a electric elemental, shoot an electric bolt at some random earth elemental (I think), and some earth girl got really narked about the whole thing and she flung vines everywhere, and it turned into a dog's dinner (a huge mess).
I then fell and got a concussion, and I got out of the cafeteria as fast I could go without passing out. There some girl named Kaloe there, and she didn't seem like too much of a bad person....although I thought her outfit was a little too...relieving. Darrel and her seemed to know each other because of the kiss on his cheek, but I didn't really pay attention to a lot. I went to the nurse's office, and fell asleep there...and right after that, I went to the court yard to kill some time.
It was quite amusing because there was a second year electric elemanti girl and an air elementi by the name of Aerilyn (she's in my control class first hour) playing a silly game of tag. Some other kid was there, but I didn't know who he was. I left as soon as I thought I was going to be set on fire by some fire kid that seemed inexperienced with his ability. I left after that,saw another dishy guy!, and sadly got my arse handed to me on a plate by my math teacher, Ms. Hayman. She works for the government, and likes to keep us Elementis in line if we do even the slightest mistake with our abilities. So after that conversation about how I had "carelessly" sent a whirlwind into Times Square, I went to the local cafe around by the school, and then went to Mr.Redgrave's class and just sat there to save myself from anything else happening to me.
I usually don't pay attention to half the things teachers talk about,but Mr.Redgrave is at least mildly interesting at times, even if he does brag about him and how he met the queen. Stuff like that. ...But yeah, when class got started, and the time passed, the old man called on me to answer something about the universe and its involvement with history. I was lucky to say religion instead of rice-aroni!
But yeah...there's one more minute until class is done....I wonder if I'll run into anybody then.

Signed, Amelia Regan-Scott; A fifth year air elemental
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Posted: Tue Aug 11, 2009 11:55 am
Kohaku Real Life & Where There's Smoke, There's Fire. 8-11-09 11:47AM ((This is something he was blabbing about in the car...so I decided to put it in here for him. +I'm just that nice. x3+ I thought it should be shared...>>;; And he'll kill me if he finds this. xD;; ))
I know what you’re doing…and I know the cost. I know that you’ve run before…and I know this is different. I know that you’re an idiot…and this time it’s the same. But I know what and why…and for once please don’t screw up.
Two paths will meet at cross roads. Many paths can be taken, but only one will be chosen. One dwells in the past and yearns for the future, while the other strives to keep going, yet has their heart in the past. Can two such as these coexist?
The former is on the way to make a change. To grasp their own reality, to make it tangible, however, the latter fears what is in the past and can only see the bad in the new. To hope for a different future is all one can do, but the past that is set in stone that the first can’t escape will surely decide what their future beholds.
While you live in the fear of loosing something you love, the urge to run is only growing stronger. The fear you’ve had since that time that what you wish to hold so dear will break before you; that it will crumble in your own two hands. What stupidity it is to have masked reality for so many years. Illusions of what you pretend to be only bear some truth. What a life it is to have wasted precious time in doubt. Only one thing can fill the heart, mind, and soul…the desire to stop at nothing and to protect what you hold dear…probably more than life itself. Perhaps the one thing you’ve desired the most in your life shall be given up for something of higher value. What is the price for pure happiness? I doubt anyone can answer that but you, and so I’ll give you the one thing you’ve waited to hear for so very long. Even if it means nothing…it comes from the heart; these words that lie dormant…and might never be uttered by that other person…Ich bin auf Sie stolz.
Don’t ever forget: Live by your heart, but never forget the mind. (It’d be nice if you used it once in awhile.)
Signed, Me for Kohaku
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