[PRP]Is the past ever just the past?[Caelin & Mapiya]-Ended

[Keantha]

The stormy grey sky above her suited her mood just perfectly. It had been nearly a week since the love of her childhood appared back into her life, tearing her childhood memories apart and causing her to question everything she thought she had knew.

God what she wouldn't give to have her sister by her side. Ry always knew how to get to the heart of such matters. What hurt the worst was that she knew, deep in her heart, past the crying filly, was that her father was indeed capable of all the pain that he had put her through.

She let her feet wander as she stared sightlessly into the sky, unaware of the rain as it plastered her mane flat, unaware of the lighting that illuminated the sky, and unaware of the tears that fell to add to the already falling water.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

Caelin had told himself he would only stay a day to get to know Mapiya's new herd and then go. That day passed and then came another and another and another. Before he knew it, almost a week had passed. A week of him in one location and not wandering. A week of him in one location with a mare he had given up on and tried to shun from his heart.

A storm was gathering but Caelin knew that ordinarily not even that could stop him from moving on after being trapped in one place for that long. Any other time he had tried to spend this long without the landscape rushing by he'd have been chewing his mane off in frustration by now. Why then, did he stay? Why did he continue to stay and did time continue to pass him by while the scenery remained the same?

Why couldn't he stop thinking about Mapiya?

That one was easy enough to answer, at least. Spending time with her had helped to remind him why he had loved her. She was beautiful, kind with adults and foals alike, and so very alive. Yes, it was very easy to figure why he couldn't stop thinking about her. Unfortunately, it was just as hard to stop thinking about the way they parted.

He should have known. In all this time he should have realized that Mapiya was more trustworthy than her father. He had allowed himself to set aside his own judgment and that was something he would now never do again. He would never believe anything said that contradicted what he felt was true in his heart... which was a good resolution but couldn't heal the pain that the two of them shared now. Pain for love, the worst trade he could imagine.

Rain had begun to fall and Caelin wondered where Mapiya had gone off to. The rest of her herd had taken shelter, so where was she? When the lightning started crackling across the sky the question became more urgent and he pushed himself out into that rain. It wasn't safe for her to be out there in this weather and if she injured herself she might not be able to take care of the kalona filly for much longer. Caelin convinced himself it was for that reason he went out searching for her. Adour needed her.

Caelin had quickened his pace into a fast trot when he caught a glimpse of blue through the rain and mist. He had found her seemingly unaware of the storm raging around her. He couldn't see her face yet, just her figure moving slowly away from him.

"Mapiya!" he called out between thunder rumbles.  

[Keantha]

She either couldn't or didn't hear him over the storm. Her ears pinned flat back as she threw her head back, giving a wordless cry of pain and sorrow. Even as the storm raged, the rage in her started to cool leaving behind only the pain and sorrow. She felt like a lost child in the dark.

"Why? Why did you have to lie to me daddy? Why drive him away? " She whimpered her head hanging helplessly tears falling fast. "Was it worth it, seeing me miserable...Damn you Daddy."

Her skin shivered and had nothing to do with the cold rain and all to do with crushing pain. How could any little girl let go of the idea of what her father was, even when the woman she was knew.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

When he heard her wailing to the sky Caelin jolted a few steps towards Mapiya in automatic response. Could she already have hurt herself?

From the few words he could catch above the pattering of rain and rumble of thunder he thought not. It was an old pain that made her cry out. His first instinct had been to help her but his second was to leave her be. She needed to let her emotions out. It was healthier than keeping them bottled in, when the merest trigger could start that flow of anger, grief, regret.

"Was it worth it, seeing me miserable?"

Those words he caught.

Was it worth it? Has anything I've done since leaving her been worth anything? He stopped still, legs suddenly feeling too unstable to move him any further. He couldn't even walk now. How could he wander again and leave this place if he was so overcome that he couldn't walk?

This time, instead of merely calling her name, he bellowed. "MAPIYA!" His cry rang out over thunder and rain, a strained plea in the storm.  

[Keantha]

Strike gold eyes turned towards him, even as the lightnigh flashed the light reflecting and making them seem to glow. She didn't move save for the chattering of her teeth and the shuddering of her skin. It wasn't cold, it was shock that caused her to shake.

It was him...the begging and the end of everything she had ever felt. She had loved him, then hated him, and now...now she didn't know what she felt. It was more than the crush her young self had felt for him, so much more that it terrorfied her even as it enlightened her.

She would never be aware of the lost and pleading look that entered her eyes as she gazed at him helplessly.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

The distance between them was a small one but the storm and emotions roaring between them made Mapiya seem miles away. His legs still felt weak beneath him but one of them lifted and planted a hoof in front of him. Another and another moved and Caelin pressed forwards towards the mare. He had been the one to run away he would be the one to come back. This time it wasn't chance that was going to bring them back together, it was his will.

"There have been too many misunderstandings," he muttered, not knowing or caring if his words would reach Mapiya. "Too much time lost. Too much of everything. It has been too much..." To quit now.

After an eternity of rain pelting his back he reached her, the rain driven into his eyes and running in rivulets down his cheeks. "Mapiya... let's go back now... ok?"  

[Keantha]

A soft whimper spilled from her as she lowered her head as he approuched. She was determined to hear anything he wished to yell at her. She deserved any beretaing, he thought she deserved but she had never expected the softness of his voice when he came up to her side.

Go back? Those words could be taken so many ways. Go back to her herd? Mapiya wasn't sure she was ready to, to goback to Pen's quiet contentment with his loving mate; to Liberty's babbeling excitement about his wonderful little mare; back to Adour's demanding needs. She loved them all dearly but...

Or did he mean go back to before? Back when there was no hurt and broken trust between them. The last few days, since he had come back into her life had been so turbulant and twisted.

Mapiya had never been a flighty mare. She had always been the stable one, the quiet one that everyone depended on and came to for answers. Her family always said she had gotten all the common sense in the family. None of that matter though as suddenly her legs moved, hooves hitting the ground as she raced into the storm. The mare would never be able to say what it was she was running from, but maybe just maybe if she ran hard enough and fast enough she would find peace even as her common sense screamed at her that it was dangerous to be racing headlong into a storm.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

As if this hadn't been hard enough. Frustration tore through the other emotions Caelin had been feeling.... frustration and a sudden stab of doubt. It wasn't enough for her. What would he have to do to get her to listen to him? Beg?

Run very fast?

Caelin took of in a splash of hooves into puddles. He couldn't run full speed over the slick ground but he could still run swiftly.... hopefully swiftly enough to catch up. No matter what happened, it wouldn't end like this again. If Mapiya had run after him that day that he left and explained things it could have saved them both a world of hurt. Maybe... maybe he could avoid the cycle by running after her today.

The beat of his hooves beneath him punctuated his thoughts as they ranged from desperate to bitter. Who am I kidding? It's too late for any of this. I can't forgive her and she can't forgive me. But at least if he caught her and talked to her about that... he might be able to forgive himself.  

[Keantha]

"He doesn't love you Piya. I'm sorry pet." She squeezed her eyes closed agianst the pain. Did he? If he once did it was doubtful he still felt the same. Hell he barely looked at her since he had returned to her life.

Opening her eyes she began to slow down as her common sense came screaming back. No, he may not love her but atleast maybe they could try and patch up some of their differences and maybe be more then just painfull memories.

Life wasn't that easy however, for no sooner had she started to slow than the ground, weakened by the heavy rains gave way under her hooves. Her eyes widened in alarm as a helpless scream of fear tore from her throat. She could feel herself falling and hear the roaring sound of the swollen river as she feel backwards. "CAEL!!" The scream was nearly lost as she disappeared over the crumpling edge of the ravien and into the storm swollen river.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

A hoarse cry of shock and alarm tore from Caelin's throat as Mapiya began to slip. He couldn't reach her, not fast enough. He lunged forward and his teeth snapped in vain where her tail had been just an instant before. She was gone.

He had jumped before he realized that was what he had decided to do. The edge of the ravine crumbled beneath him as he sprung off it, turning a leap into his legs flailing through the air, the world spinning dizzyingly beneath him. The pounding noise of water filled his ears but he was still falling.

Just like a week ago when he had seen Mapiya again for the first time, he was reminded of his previous journey from a muddy bank below into a raging river. This time it wasn't a metaphor. He landed behind Mapiya in the water and his head dipped under for one strangling second before his legs churned into motion and brought him back up again. He didn't have time to be emotional now. Their past and future weren't going to be important at all if they couldn't survive this moment.  

[Keantha]

The cold water drove all the air from her lung as she coughed and sputtered trying to keep her head above the turning water. She was dimmly aware of another body caught in the rapids with her but it took all her focus to try to keep her head above the water.

Mapiya had never been a very strong swimmer, a fact that terrorfied her now as she began to slip under again. No matter how she kicked and struggled, the pull of the water was stronger and she disappeared under the swirling water again.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

If his heart hadn't already been sprinting with the effort of keeping himself afloat it certainly would have started when he saw Mapiya disappear beneath the water. Soquili could and did drown at times like this... but he wasn't going to let that happen to her!

His back hooves found a rock beneath them and he used it to leap forward through the water and beside where Mapiya had gone under. He took one deep breath and plunged his head under. His eyes were wide open but they could have been shut for all the good they did in helping him see. It wasn't sight but touch that allowed him to find Mapiya, a few strands of mane against his face.

His head shot forward and his teeth snapped shut around what he hoped was Mapiya's mane and not some drowned animal. The muscles in his neck stood out like cords beneath fur as he pulled and pulled upwards through the raging water.  

[Keantha]

Mapiya coughed and sputtered as he pulled them both to the surface. She struggled weakly in a blind panic, but luckily for both of them she was a little more than half drowned and he was easily able to control her, dragging them both towards the shore.

Once he had gotten her pointed in the right direction, his larger body breaking the water, she was able to struggle along with him. Often she started to slip back under only to have him catch her again, dragging her along till she could swim on her own.  

[Roniel REVOLUTION]

"Need... to get... to shore," gasped Caelin once Mapiya had regained control. The pouring rain and splashing water made it hard to see but ahead he thought he could make out a bank that was less steep than the others. "There!" He jabbed his nose in it's direction and angled his body towards it. It looked muddy and slick but they weren't going to find any better place to climb out during the storm.

"You get out first. Use me for leverage!" If he could properly brace himself then she could use him as an extra boost in climbing. She would need the help more than he did and he only hoped it would be enough.  

[Keantha]

It was a tense moment as she tried to get out, her hooves scrambling in the slick mud as her weakened legs refused to comperate. It took three tries before she could heave herself out onto the bank. The exhaused mare stumbled a few shakey steps from the river edge before she collapsed, her sides heaving, her once blue coat brown and black with mud.