|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed Jun 20, 2007 6:00 pm
I finally escaped
All my fears
I finally escaped
From my tears
I finally escaped
Your strong hold
I finally escaped
From the cold.
I finally escaped
From your gaze
I finally escaped
Aren’t you amazed?
I finally escaped
My dark past
I finally escaped
You at last.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Jun 21, 2007 6:54 pm
Not to shaby, but repeating the same thing over and over again get's boreing. Also since there is no other rhymes beside "I finally escaped" every two lines, makes it dull to reaad.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jun 22, 2007 3:39 pm
Ok, thanks for telling me! mrgreen
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 11:01 pm
it was blah and i really din't feel the emotion.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 11:38 am
I really like this, but I would like it of the last lines were changed to two lines, to help along the rythm.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
