Welcome to Gaia! ::

I'M GLAD YOU'RE WAITING UNTIL YOU'RE OLDER. A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T, AND END UP HAVING TO GROW UP MUCH TOO FAST THEMSELVES. TRUST ME, EVEN IF YOU'VE HAD A 'LIFE' BEFORE HAVING CHILDREN, YOU STILL FEEL LIKE YOU SUDDENLY AGED 20 YEARS IN ONE.

AS FAR AS PREGNANCY GOES, I HAD A LOT OF WORRIES ABOUT WHAT COULD GO WRONG. I EVEN WENT SO FAR AS TO MAKE A LIST OF WHAT BIRTH DEFECTS I COULD HANDLE MAKING A CHILD LIVE WITH, AND WHICH ONES I WOULD TERMINATE MY PREGNANCY OVER. MY CRITERIA WAS THAT IF A CHILD COULD HAVE SOMETHING RESEMBLING A NORMAL LIFE, EVEN IF IT REQUIRED ASSISTANCE LIKE A WHEELCHAIR, ETC, I COULD LIVE WITH KNOWING HE/SHE WOULD BE ALRIGHT WHEN I WASN'T AROUND ANYMORE. ANYTHING THAT WOULD LEAVE THEM AT THE MERCY OF THE GOVERNMENT, OR IN A 'HOME' AFTER I DIED WAS SIMPLY NOT ACCEPTABLE FOR MY CHILD TO HAVE TO SUFFER WITH.

PREGNANCY ITSELF ISN'T ALL THAT BAD. I HAD A FEW SCARES BECAUSE I'M SUCH A SMALL PERSON TO BEGIN WITH (5'4" AND 100LBS), WHERE WHEN I GOT BIG, THE BABY LAID JUST RIGHT TO CUT OFF ALL OF THE BLOOD SUPPLY TO THE RIGHT SIDE OF MY BODY. I THOUGHT I WAS HAVING A STROKE; WENT TO THE HOSPITAL IN AN AMBULANCE AND EVERYTHING.

I ALSO HAD AN APPENDICITIS AND HAD TO HAVE SURGERY WHEN I WAS ABOUT 5 1/2 MONTHS ALONG. THAT WHOLE THING SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH, BECAUSE THEY HAD TO PUT ME UNDER, OF COURSE, AND I WAS AFRAID THE DRUGS WOULD PUT THE BABY INTO A COMA IN UTERO. (HIGHLY UNLIKELY, BUT POSSIBLE.)

OTHER THAN THAT, PREGNANCY WASN'T ALL THAT BAD, AND THOSE THINGS AREN'T THE NORM FOR MOST WOMEN. I JUST DREW THE LUCKY STRAW, AND HONESTLY, NEITHER I NOR THE BABY WAS EVER IN ANY REAL DANGER.

AS FAR AS LABOR GOES...OH. MY.GAWD. SORRY, BUT I CAN'T LIE TO YOU. IT WAS ABSOLUTELY THE MOST HORRIFIC PAIN I'VE EVER FELT IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. AFTER MY WATER BROKE AND IT REALLY GOT BAD (I'M TOLD I SOUNDED LIKE A COW GROANING), IT REALLY HIT ME THAT BEFORE MODERN HEALTHCARE CAME ABOUT, WOMEN REALLY DID USED TO DIE HAVING BABIES, AND SUDDENLY I KNEW WHY.

BUT, AT THE SAME TIME, WHILE IT'S ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE AND IT FEELS LIKE YOU'RE GOING TO DIE, YOU HAVE MEDICAL HELP RIGHT THERE, AND HONESTLY, WOMEN IN COMAS HAVE GIVEN BIRTH. LITERALLY.

YOUR BODY KNOWS WHAT TO DO. THAT'S WHAT IT'S MADE FOR. EVEN IF YOU'RE UNCONCIOUS, THE BABY WILL BE BORN, SO THERE'S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT THERE.

AND IF YOU HAVE A SUPER-BIG BABY LIKE A FRIEND OF MINE DID, THAT'S WHAT CAESAREANS ARE FOR.

I ENDED UP GETTING AN EPIDURAL WHEN I WAS DILATED TO A 4 SO THE ANESTHESIOLOGIST COULD GO DO A CAESAREAN (THEY CAN'T LEAVE DURING THOSE IN CASE IT WEARS OFF), AND FROM THERE, IT WAS A PIECE OF CAKE.

BEFORE THAT, IT REALLY WAS AWFUL, BUT BY THE SAME TOKEN, AS SOON AS I HELD MY DAUGHTER THE FIRST TIME, I KNEW THAT IF I HAD DREAMED IT ALL, AND HAD TO MAKE A CHOICE TO DO IT AGAIN, I WOULD CHOOSE TO GO THROUGH IT EVERY TIME, BECAUSE IT REALLY IS WORTH IT.

AND, THERE'S THE POTENTIAL FOR YOU TO SEE THE TRIPPIEST, MOST SCI-FI THING YOU'LL EVER HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO SEE IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE WHEN YOU'RE HAVING A BABY, BECAUSE YOU CAN ACTUALLY LOOK DOWN AND SEE ANOTHER PERSON HALF-IN AND HALF-OUTSIDE OF YOU. PUTS EVERY SCI-FI MOVIE I EVER SAW TO SHAME, HANDS DOWN. blaugh

SERIOUSLY; WHEN YOU'RE READY, IT'S COMPLETELY WORTH ALL THE ACHES AND PAINS TO GET THERE, WHERE YOU HAVE THAT LITTLE PERSON THAT SOMEHOW, YOU MADE.

AND IF YOU REALLY DON'T THINK YOU CAN DEAL WITH THE PREGNANCY/CHILDBIRTH ASPECT OF IT--THERE ARE THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS OF CHILDREN WAITING TO BE ADOPTED.

in the nine months only about five of it sometimes up to seven is bad but once you have a kid it will make up for it all with decade's of love

OMFG!! i can't believe it! a wise teenager. Ten thousand Blessings on you, my dear. May your life go smoothly, may you never struggle in school and may the man you choose be worthy of you!

heart heart heart
please excuse my enthusiasm, but i live a little rural town where it is the norm to see pregnant teens at the high school and they even have a day care for the girls. for decades i hear gals tell other teenagers not to do the same thing they did and have unprotected sex. these same teenagers quickly go out and have kids.

that being said, i had the same problems with needles at your age and by the time I went through invitro 20+ years later, it was no big deal. considering i had to have bloodwork every 2 weeks for 3 months then surgery, then the shots twice a day, etc ad nauseum....

i was terrified that something would go wrong with my pregnancy. but I ate right and exercised. it was the smoothest older mother pregnancy ever!