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This may not seem like it at first, but it is sexual assault and rape related.

I've always had quite the mouth when it comes to speaking my mind.
...So much so that whenver I see a girl in a mini-skirt or short-shorts go by, I'll comment or say something to her.
...Well, the night before last, I picked a bad verbal fight.
I walked by this girl, (and her friends, and their boyfriends), who had been in my theatre class and had known I think she's a whore.
I wasn't going to say anything at first, but she gave me quite the evil glare.
So I did.
I walked by and loudly asked, "Quite the cold night tonight. Makes you wish you were wearing clothes."
She replied, "
"You're just ********' jelous you ********' b***h!"
"Oh really? Last time I checked, I was the model and you WEREN'T! *Big grin - turn around - walk away"
((I'm going in the modelling industry. I'm not a model yet, but hey, I will be within' the next month and a half. ^^ I'm not just counting my chickens before they hatch either, I've been scouted to model for a website already, I just turned them down. I'm going with a friend next month to his photoshoot -he's a model too- and he's going to introduce me to his agency.))

Anyway... I guess that struck a nerve in the little thing.
Her and 'possy' started to fallow me and my boyfriend, and our model friend, down the street.
"You think you're a ********' model, Ali??? You're the ********' ugliest ********' c**t I know!"
- Me and my friend giggle about them. -
"Turn around and say that to my ********' face, b***h!"
"Ali, don't!!!!," said my boyfriend.
"Shush, Corey. *Turns to the girl.* Easilly. You. Look. Like. A. Cheap. 2$. Whore. : )"
"Yeah, well you look like a ********' nun! *Her friends chip in.* Yeah, a ********' nun! Atleast we get some-- You don't, you ********' c**t!---"

That. Set. Me. On. Fire.
I immediatly filled with rage and stormed over to the girl.
"You know what!? It's girls like YOU that cause girls like me to get raped and sexually assaulted each day!!!! You and that style of clothing make yourself out to be NOTHING but a cheap sex craving toy! So ofcourse what will guys think of you as?! A toy!!! And in turn, they treat ALL women like that!!!!! *Started to point in her face while screaming at her* You think it's something to be proud of that you're getting laid!?!?!?! I guess in your case, if you're payed well for it, you don't care!!!! And it's really something to be proud of that you're a non-virgin!!! What the ******** do you hold dear?! Are you that pathetic?!?! You know, I was always told that there's some dignity in everybody, but you sluts have proven me wrong!!!!!!!!--"

I must have struck another nerve because she threw a very flimsy punch.
...It actually didn't hurt at all. But I lashed back ten times as hard. I started punching her face until she bled from her nose and mouth. Well, she tried to grab my hair and pull, but I grabbed hers first. We threw eachother to the ground and I tried to gouge her eye out. I failed and only clawed her face well. But then I felt my boyfriend and friend pulling me away, and her friends pulling her away. I then could only slam my heels down onto her clearly uncovered legs to cut her up a little.
She barely could stand and her friends had to hold her up. I stood straight up, brushed the hair from my eye and said,
"Oh, it's a pity. You're hair is all messed up. That's never gonna' get you laid."
She tried to come at me again and her friends held her back asking if she was okay.
...Well, my boyfriend who hates fights pulled me to the side and started with the whole,
"Ali, what the hell is your problem?! You don't need to fight over something this stupid!"
"It's not stupid!!! YOU KNOW WHAT KEVIN ******** DID TO ME!!"
So you know... Kevin was a friend who had done a lot of crap involving rape and sexual assult to me over the past nine months.
"But Ali, it's not their fault! Maybe they just like that style of clothing!"
The girl's friends chip in--
"Yeah, maybe we just like the style because it's not dressing as a nun. It's a cute style. And under our miniskirts are shorts, ya ********' b***h!"
"And why, may I ask, do you dress like that, hm?"
"Because we ********' feel like it!!"
"No, no, what you mean to say is; 'Because we want to show some leg- And why's that? 'Because we want male attention' So all you care about is showing guys your bodies? Wow, you really are whores!"
"Look, can we all just leave each other alone and forget about this s**t?!-- Jesus christ!!! You shouldn't be fighting!"
"I don't see what you see in your nun of a girlfriend-- She's a hoe and you should dump her a**!"
"You're one to critisize! You've never had a real relationship in your life, all you have are ******** buddies and pimps."
"What the ******** ever...."

...So the girl and her friends and their boyfriends left...
I remained teary eyed crying about what my friend did to me last July. And crying about what two more friends did to me last year. And crying and crying about what my best friend did to me not even two months ago...
The rest of the night, I felt a guilt.
A very strong guilt.
And I didn't know why... I still don't...
A small part of it could be that now that what happened with my friends is out in the open, there will a ton of rumors at school about me. Great.. But oh well. I can deal with that.
Another tiny part could be that now because of the fight, a lot of gangster-assholes under the command of Emma (the popular girl at school who is the best friend of the girl I fought) will be out to hurt me, or worse, my boyfriend.

I know that what happened to me is not all those kind of girls' fault.
But parts of it ARE.
Yesterday, I found out that the chick I fought was a rape victem as well.
...Then why does she put herself out like that? I'm not even angry about it. It's sad. Doesn't she have SOME self respect? It's absolutely terrible.

Am I wrong to blame girls for not all, but still part, of the reason we're raped and abused?
Am I wrong to pick little arguments because I believe if you dress like a slut, you are a slut?
Maybe I'm being too judgemental. But it seems fair.. Why else would you dress in such a degrading manner?
...

Was I wrong to lash back?

Its kind of ridiculous to tell someone what they can and can't wear. Your school dress code should handle other peoples attire. If it bothers you, say something to a teacher in private. There is no need to fight about something so obsolete. In our High School we have a Zero Tolerance for fighting. And any fighting, even self defense results in immediate expulsion.

What a girl wears doesn't make it okay for her to be raped. Even if a girl is a whore, if she says "NO." She means it, and just because she looks like a Whore to you, that doesn't make her one. I am sure she has family that love her, and if you have really been raped then you should know that it hurts. You have PTSD and other things that cause the rape to become a part of your life. Just because you don't agree with the way someone dresses, that doesn't give you the right to lash out at them. Or the right for them to be raped. Rape is about control, not about sexuality.

I dress like a punk at my school. And I always get s**t. For being a poser, or whatever have you. They don't have to right to make me feel bad about my personal choice. And you don't either. Honestly, if you started s**t with someone, you are bound to get into a fight. So if you don't want s**t, then don't start s**t.

Most schools have a Zero Tolerance. Go to your school counselor and tell them what happened, and that you are afraid that someone will attack you or your friends. Tell them that you feel her dress is distracting and inappropriate. They will tell her she needs to wear more clothes. But if she is under dress code, then you just need to get over it. Because that means that Adults feel it is okay for her to dress that way. And that it isn't bad.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to look good. And if a girl has the body, shes going to show it off. That is the style right now. Showing off your mid drift and cleavage. But if you don't agree, you can't sit there and bash her. A teacher should handle it. You are in school, and that is how it works. You are not an adult so therefore, you are not mature enough to handle a dispute. And you showed that very clearly.

Rape victims feel a lot of guilt. That is very common. She might be dressing that way because she feels like a whore. And feels guilty because of it. It happens in a lot of rape victims. Honestly, she is probably hurting inside just like you are. Even though you don't agree with what she wears, you two probably have a lot more in common than you think. If you are willing, and she is mature enough, you two can probably work it out. Talk to her in private with out her posy. If you can't get her alone, have a counselor do it for you. They are always willing to prevent a fight by verbal discussions. And it will be very big of you to stand up to her and agree to disagree.

Just like LorienLlewellyn said. There is a lot of ways you can get involved rather than lashing out. But you have to remember, the style of today is very revealing. Mostly because the media tells women, in order to be beautiful you must be half naked. Ha ha. I feel they are disrespecting themselves. And I do generate opinions based on the way they dress. I try not to stereotype though. I know how it feels to have people down your back.

If you are a goth, then you should totally know. Goths get s**t all the time. About being Satanist, druggies and what not. You know? But just because you happen to like a certain style, that doesn't make you a freak, a pill head or a Satanist. Those are all different issues. And You know that as a goth. Not all Goths like Marilyn Manson, and not all people who wear short-shorts are sluts and whores.

Try not to stereotype. And like my mom always said "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all." It prevents a lot of unwanted attention and disagreements. Talk to your schools. Check out the school dress code. If there isn't one. START ONE! That is a great way to help regulate what people can wear and what they can't. If you have a good voiced opinion you can probably get more people involved at your school and start a club.

I do think that that entire scenario was very immoral and wrong. It was not their fault for what happened to you. It wasn't anybody's fault but the rapist himself.
Just because they dress skankily does not mean they're asking for it. They're just doing it because it's fashion. Loudly opinionated or not, you have no right to ridicule them for it. You started it, didn't you? If I said "WOW YOU DRESS CONSERVATIVE, GO DIE IN A HOLE YOU NON WHORE" is that right for me? No. So is it right for you to call them whores, REGARDLESS if they do have sex or not?
Weither or not girls dress skankily does NOT contribute to rapes that happen everyday. Rapes happened back when women were required to dress conservitively and they happened now. Rape is an act of violence, not an act upon stereotyping women.
Y'know? Some people, even if they have been raped, do not want that to affect their entire life. Why should they change their attire because they were assaulted? People get assaulted just by wearing conservative clothing.


You were wrong to lash back, I'm sorry to say.


Anger is powerful. But do not raise the fist if you have no ground to support yourself with.
Anger should be used for the betterment. If you are angry about your rape, take it out by making it more aware in your community that rape happens. But don't ridicule other people. There is nothing worse than that.