Welcome to Gaia! ::

I wrote this as a slam poem for me to perform at an assembly (sp?) at my school. But, I do not know if they will let me. Anyways..


Through my heart bitter blood flows
like a black noxious cloud,
a suffocating haze,
that clogs the heart and
speeds up the pace.
In times like this
through every breath,
hatred seethes.
I can't breathe!
I hate this!
Stifled by the injustice of society,
all this hatred, corrupting my priorities.
So much anger, so much pain.
So much bullshit, it's
practically a waste.
So much that it weighs down my heart and soul
frustration and anger
totally taking control
And I thrash in the throughs of the
emotional pain
wilding out like a burning soul,
a sick ghost in the chains.
The chains of society is where I get my hate.

...

Deep down I can feel it
building up
like a fire, soul-sizzling,
soul-writhing, overwhelming, soul-crying,
this rage, this drive, this blight, ...
this beseeching, redeeming, empowering light.
Reach out to touch, to grab, to claim,
To harness, to ride,
To quit the passive-aggressive bide.
And I let it erupt, despite my pride.
There’s a sadness, deep-seated,
Collecting over the years,
But sadness is not accepted so the
Madness is revealed.
Internal tears boil and fester
Into crackling vials of hate.
They scream at you to stop,
But you know its too late.

…

It keeps buildin’ up
Until I'm screamin' out
tearing everybody down,
forcing all my friends out-
out, out of my life, out of my mind.
Bowling them over, before I hurt them further.
This anger’s an endless spiral,
A tight vortex of hate
I'm drawn downward, as this passion
sings through my chest like ethereal pain.

…

‘Till it came time for this malice to break
When that fiery switch is finally straight,
Consciousness wains,
The vials of wrath bound to detonate.
I swung at my enemy with a knife
The main nemesis whose plagued me
All my life.
There she was, tears in her eyes;
I could already feel her hot blood
Spray on my thighs. …
In that moment, my soul flies
The pain is released,
Vindication set the end of my lease,
My lease to hate, my lease to pain,
My masochistic agreement to submit to
My rivals needs,
No longer will they be pleased. …

.............

Deep down I can feel it
smoldering out,
like an ember, soul-grazing,
soul-weeping, depressing, soul-bleeding,
this rage, this sickness, this burnt out drive,
this beseeching, redeeming, empowering light. ...
Reach out to touch, to grab, to push away,
All it turned out to be was a destructive flame.
I’ve lost my breath,
My eyes are wide,
What have I done,
I’ve taken a life!
How long this world’s corruption has driven me on,
Only so long till that hated corruption and I are one.
I tried to refrain, I tried to restrain,
But through that karmic switch,
Murder was the pitch.
I've lost my breath,
my eyes are wide, getting wider as I lose my mind.
and finally I find, the only way out of
this spiral, is death.
But no, death isn’t the only way
The key is the will to change.
The path to redemption is spiritual growth,
Moving away from all the
hate, anger, and pain.
Embracing the things that leave me flawed,
Leave me psychically maimed.
I can change! I can grow!
I know I can! I made the wrong choice!
Just give me a chance!

But no …

I've lost my breath,
my eyes are wide
my own blades at my neck,
and with a violent swipe,
a scream of pain,
I'm losing my life. . . .
and finally I find, the only way out of
this spiral, isn’t death, but change.
And I’m finding this out, too late.