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 Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 5:16 pm
Without you im lost in my dreams,
Without you it feel like memories are just dreams,
And now Im here without you,
In dark near a door that stores those memories that i can only remember when your here with me because your the key that can open that door,
As i lay here on the floor sore from pain that has been caused by that door trying to open it but never could,
You watch me and hold me close and give me a memory that will stay in my heart forever more.....
(i know it suxs)
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Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 5:18 pm
tell me what u think even though i bet most of u r gonna think it suxs
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Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2007 3:22 am
Constructive Criticism: The first two lines don't flow well. Both start with 'Without' and end in 'Dreams' yet have little continuity.
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