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You might have heard it said that depression is anger turned inwards. Tonight I was thinking about that. It could very well be true.

The thing is, I don't ever feel angry. Well, maybe once every two years or so. It takes a lot. Is it possible that I'm so used to not expressing my anger that I don't even feel it any more? Is it possible to barely ever get angry without having something wrong with your way of thinking?

I was thinking, maybe I need to get angry. But where to start? What am I supposed to get angry about? And how do I make myself get angry if I don't really want to?

Or am I barking up the wrong tree here?

You sound like me. My ex told me I need to get angry more often, that I shouldn't bottle it inside. But the thing is, I just don't get angry. I just don't. I go through a series of other emotions, and it generally takes a lot for me to be really pissed off. So I'd rather be annoyed, frustrated, whatever. It's not worth it to get angry, even over some bigger things.

Anger can be constructive... if you handle it well.
When people rage, break things, scream at people... well, that's obviously NOT constructive. Anger generally equals frustration, but some people just don't get that.

I have a few things I do when I'm mad: I throw am empty plastic bottle, punch a pillow, or occasionally kick something that can't be damaged. And then I take a deep breath, and actually deal with the problem itself.

The people who think that expressing anger is the way to DEAL with their problems are the ones who have "anger problems". Screaming at someone doesn't fix anything, nor does breaking things or whatnot.

So, really, if you get upset but you manage to deal with it without resorting to anger, then there's not really a problem.

However, if you NEVER express frustration, anger, irritation or anything of the like, it really is a problem. Find the episode of the Simpsons where Ned snaps if you need explanation. smile

So if you can talk through things, or walk away during a fight so you don't yell, or things like that, then you actually handle anger WELL, so there's nothing to worry about.

I hope that helped some.

Very true. Yet again, making the venting of anger constructive... like when I got mad at a computer company, obviously yelling at them wouldn't help, so instead I researched, made phone calls, and found out enough things to shove their butts into a corner. It was nice. smile

Also, like Zeltoric said, sometimes when you're angry, you're better able to deal with situations. Socially, when I'm angry, I speak very quickly, very monotone, and a whole vocabulary comes out that I don't always know I have. When dealing with people, it's intimidating and generally impressive *stifles ego* and often gets me good results.

You've just got to find out how you can vent anger constructively, and also you need to make sure you realize when you're angry. If you catch yourself thinking, "I SHOULD be angry," then ask yourself why you're not. Expressing emotions, including anger, is healthy.

Nothing wrong with venting anger by playing video games. As long as you don't get pissed and throw and break controllers like someone I know.