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 Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2007 9:16 pm
A guy that I've been friends with since 2001 has always liked me more then friends.
I don't feel that way about him though, nothing at all more then a friend.
He keeps asking me to have sex with him, I mean constantly! This is happening almost on a daily basis and it's getting beyond a joke.
Although I feel ready to have sex, I don't want it to be with him. I want it to be with a guy that I am dating.
I have told him this. I have said it hundreds of times. Everytime I always say no. Why doesn't he get it?
It's ruining the friendship, I'm beginning to refuse seeing him when it's just us two because I'm getting scared that he will try to force me to do something. I know that he is not like that, but I still feel that he would.
How else can I tell him no and get him to actually understand it?
What I usually say to him:
"no"
"you wish"
"as if I would"
"we are not dating, we'll never date, so no"
"why do you keep asking when you already know the answer is no?"
etc
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Posted: Tue Jan 30, 2007 9:20 pm
Also when I say no, he talks himself up like he's some sex god or something.
It makes me feel really uncomfortable to be around him.
Then he also goes on about how all these girls are apparently dying to sleep with him, how often he gets it, with who and so on.
Bit more info on what he's like
He's always been a good friend otherwise so I don't want to loose him, I just want him to stop this and no matter how often I tell him to stop it, he still does it.
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Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 7:10 am
I just replied. How irritating that it didn't go through.
Anyway, I said in a slightly lengthier fashion, what if he thinks it's just a bit of fun? Just tell him he's making you uncomfortable because you don't want to have sex with him or even anyone else right now.
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Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 9:14 am
Tell him point blank that it's making you uncomfortable. If he keeps on, I'm not saying you have to end the friendship, but a break is probably a really great idea. If he asks why you aren't hanging out so much, tell him the reason yet again.
I'm not saying avoid him, but just if he starts it up again, tell him you have to go, cut him off, leave. If he's a decent person and a true friend, he'll get the point.
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Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2007 11:14 pm
i'm not goign to lie to you and say i knwo everything about stuff like this. but i'm learning... nayway.
1. he's a guy. men think with their p***s's. .....(regretably...this is a major fault in my genders development i appologise for him on my behalf)
2. You're obviously a highly attractive woman if he's constantly asking you to sleep with him.
3. if he keeps it up telling him no won't normally be enough.... stare as..you've ..found out already........ stare stare stare stare stare
my best bet would be to hurt him. not physically, but emotionaly. that got through to one of my female friends who was asking me to do stuff with her when i was in ninth grade. for about a year and a half she kept askign me. from a day within two weeks to everysingle time we met in the hall. eventually i pulle dher aside, and put everythign bluntly.
"i'll never sleep with you. your a very unnatractive person in my eyes and you're begging isn't making you even less attractive...ect. ect."
didn't bug me from then on. although i probably hit a nerve because she clubbed me over the head with her book bag which had six geometry books in it the nextday sending me down two flights of stairs so sweatdrop ....yeah do it cautiously
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Posted: Thu Feb 01, 2007 4:54 am
KaseyBaby Also when I say no, he talks himself up like he's some sex god or something. It makes me feel really uncomfortable to be around him. Then he also goes on about how all these girls are apparently dying to sleep with him, how often he gets it, with who and so on. Bit more info on what he's like He's always been a good friend otherwise so I don't want to loose him, I just want him to stop this and no matter how often I tell him to stop it, he still does it. it kinda sounds to me like maybe someone is pressuring him to have sex with you (like maybe he made a bet?), or someone is teasing him for being a virgin (even though i quoted you saying he tells you how "experienced" he is, from what you said, it sounds to me like he's either insecure or being metaphorically "prodded" by someone holding a pimped out electric cow prod). anywho, i suggest that you tell him that if he keeps asking you to have sex with him, you tell him that you don't want to hang out with him until he can learn to keep his p***s to himself, 'cuz you don't want anything to do with it. or, you could explain it to him like he was a little child. (<-- esp. if he's horny; it's the only way i can explain stuff to my boyfriend when he's horny) *nods wisely*
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Posted: Thu Feb 01, 2007 12:55 pm
lunashock Tell him point blank that it's making you uncomfortable. If he keeps on, I'm not saying you have to end the friendship, but a break is probably a really great idea. If he asks why you aren't hanging out so much, tell him the reason yet again. I'm not saying avoid him, but just if he starts it up again, tell him you have to go, cut him off, leave. If he's a decent person and a true friend, he'll get the point. Agreed.
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Posted: Thu Feb 01, 2007 5:02 pm
Personally, I think hurting him emotionally would be a bad idea. You do have to be firm with him, though. Let him know he can't continue or there will be consequences.
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Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 8:20 pm
You should keep a eye on him also if he is anywhere near you. I have heard of many similar stories. Even nice guys can turn bad, it hard to trust anyone these days. Try not to be alone with him day or night, weather he asks you, or you ask him, it could turn ugly.
For some guys, communication works, for others force is the only way. So, if communication isn't going to work, get parent's friends or the law to back you up.
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