Welcome to Gaia! ::

Hello, Amanda here. This fic came together with my two friends and sister.

Note from your friendly, neighborhood CW crewmember, finalrain: One of the other versions of this said it was a Slayers fan fic.

Lona
Nikki
Amanda
Jenn

We acted this out as it was written, so please enjoy everything...especially the random stuff....Belive me, it was VERY off the top of our head...

Mind you, this is supposed to be far from in character! ^_^

Phibrizzo's Game of Dodge Ball!! ^_^


Phibrizzo: *taps Lina on shoulder* HI!

Lina: AHHH! ITS PHIBRIZZO! DON'T KILL ME! OR ELSE... ill use the giga slave....

Phibrizzo: Look its amelia!! *snaps his fingers at her*

Amelia: *dies*

Lina: How.. could.. you...do ...this....

Phibrizzo: *snaps more*

Lina: *blinks*

Phibrizzo: *snaps*

Lina: *blinks*

Phibrizzo: *snaps*

Lina: *blinks* *folds arms*

Phibrizzo: Its not working!!!!! *shakes fingers* What's wrong with you!! *ponders* I just had you fine tuned yesterday!! Fine then we'll try another thing! lets play a game!

Lina: oh no.. not a game!

Phibrizzo: *teleports them to "secret" room in previously mentioned house* The object of this game is to..*ball appears in hand* avoid this ball. you cant touch it, you cant catch it. if you do.. u die.

Lina: what if it hits you?

Phibrizzo: it doesn't work on mazokus. *throws ball at himself* now who wants to play first round?

Lina: i think I'm the only one playing!

Phibrizzo: okay then lets resurrect the princess! *brings Amelia back to life*

Lina: so its only the two of us?

Phibrizzo: okay.. lets bring in the Chimera and the blond swordsman! *Zel and Gourry enter*
and Martina!

Martina: oh great

lina: now you have to die! hehe..

Phibrizzo: ok then how bout my dear borrowed mazoku general and priest Xellos Matallium

Xellos: *phases in* heeeeeello i guess I'll play this game. i don't really want to....

Phibrizzo: *glares and holds a golden ball*

Xellos: but i guess I'll play

Phibrizzo: i knew you would agree *puts on cutesy face*

Martina: but i thought you shaved your head *hold up Xellos hair*

Xellos: *makes curious face* well i guess i grew it BACK VERY FAST

MARTINA: well lets shave it again *shaves Xellos head*

Phibrizzo: ya know I'm not into the bald look

Xellos:I'm not really either

Phibrizzo: Well then bring back your old body....and you*points to Martina*

Martina: yes?! *flutters eyelashes*

Phibrizzo: if you shave my mazoku's head again then *hold up a golden orb*

Martina: *sticks out tongue*

Phibrizzo:so if you wanna play like that *STICKS OUT TONGUE*

Martina: *slams into wall and groans*

Lina:L lets just get on with this game

Phibrizzo surprised k... *put one arm in the air* LETS BEGIN!

Martina:*hums theme song*

Lina:*sings*

Phibrizzo: fine then...you're first *potions to Martina*

Martina:*steps forward* wait a minute *holds up finger* *slouches* I don't know how to play

Phibrizzo: It's simple, avoid the ball.

Martina: What's the ball gonna do?

Lina: If the ball hits you, you're dead.

Phibrizzo:*holds up ball and throws it at Martina*

Martina: *ducks*

Ball: *follows Martina, is controlled by Phibrizzo*

Martina: *runs around screaming*

Phibrizzo: *struggles to avoid panicking Martina*

Lina: Go Phibrizzo!!!

Ball: *hits Martina*

Martina: I'll get you for this Phibrizzo!!! *dies*

Lina: Well there goes Martina

Phibrizzo: Looks like I won!! Who's next?? ::childish grin::

Cheerleaders: *chanting and jumping, with the ball* Boom check out the girls with the butts!! Phibrizzo, Phibrizzo he's our man, if he can't do it no one can!! Go Phibrizzo *throws ball to Phibrizzo*

Phibrizzo: *blink blink* Where'd they come from?? ::confused face::

cheerleaders: *scamper away*

Phibrizzo: Who's next?? Gourry!!! ::light shines on Gourry::

Announcer voice: Gourry!! Come on down!!

Gourry: Auuuuuuuuuuuuu.......awoooooooooo.......awooooooooo. ::needs to go potty::

Lina: ::goes to Gourry:: Listen Gourry, one thing

Gourry: *jumping, really has to go!!::

Lina: Gourry!!!!

Gourry: Sorry!! ::tries to hold in, and stops::

Lina: Ok this time listen to me!!

Gourry: *nods and whimpers*

Lina: Ok, if the ball comes towards you just get out your sword and hit it away. ::walks away::

Gourry: Awwwwwwww....ok.....

Phibrizzo: Ok.....lets begin!! ::evil face::

Lina: come on Gourry, you can do it!!

Phibrizzo: *sends out ball* Lets see you dodge this one!!

ball: *flies towards Gourry*

Gourry: ::hits ball with sword::

ball: *bounces away*

cheerleaders: Boom! Check out the girls with the butts!! Boom! Check out the girls with the butts!! Hit em, whack em! Make em Fall!! Stick the sword in to the ball!!

Gourry: *drools*

Lina: Pay attention!!

Cheerleaders: *scamper off*

Phibrizzo: *blink blink* I thought they cheered for me!! *sob* Ok!! Lets continue!! *directs ball towards Gourry*

Gourry: *staring at a bug on the ground*

Lina: Gourry!!

ball: ::comes for Gourry's head::

Lina: Gourry! Move to the left!! Or I'll fire ball you!! Dragon Slave you!!

Gourry: *moves to the right*

ball: *moves to the right*

Phibrizzo: *directs ball up and hits Gourry on the head*

Gourry: Ow! Ooh.....Buggy!! *dies*

Cheerleaders: Boom! Check out the girls with the butts!! Boom! Check out the girls with the butts!!
*to Lina*That's alright, that's ok!! Phibrizzo's gonna beat you anyway!!

Phibrizzo: Yaa!!

Lina: Thanks a lot

Phibrizzo: *glares at Lina* At least I have cheerleaders!! All you have is a really small chest.

Lina: grrr......now you're in big, big trouble mister

Phibrizzo: Now now, you'll have your chance when it's your turn. Now who's next? How about.....Amelia!!!

Amelia: *steps in to ring* I will defeat this ball in the name of justice!! ::holds up hand in peace sign::

Cat: *runs past Amelia*

Amelia: *picks up cat and kisses cat*

Phibrizzo: You lose!!!

cat: I'm the ball in disguise!! *Changes in to ball*

Amelia: Nooooo!!!!!!! Miss Lina, this isn't fear!! ::falls over and dies::

cheerleaders:: Boom! Check out the girls with the butts!! Boom! Check out the girls with the butts!!
Brr! It's cold in here. There must be some evil in the atmosphere. I said Brr!! It's cold in here!! There must be some evil in the atmosphere!

A: *kicks cheerleader #2*

Cheerleaders: *step on Amelia as they scamper out*

P: *blink blink* did they mean that in a good way or bad way? Now...back to the matter at hand...

Sylphiel: ::walks in:: What's going on?

Xellos: We're playing a wonderful game of dodge ball

Sylphiel: Ooh, I want to play. And where's Gourry Dear?

everyone: ::points to Gourry's corpse next to bug::

Sylphiel: ::Lina,, did you dragon slave poor Gourry dear again?

Lina: Ah...well...actually...

Phibrizzo: *interrupts* Lets play!! ::pulls Sylphiel in to ring::

Hot dog Vendor: Hot dogs!! Get ya' Hot dogs heeeeere!!

Lina: *runs towards vendor* Hot dogs!! I need Hot dogs!! Give me 1000!!

Vendor: You've got money?

Lina: I've got gold coins.

Vendor: That'll be 500,000 dollars

Lina: dollars?

Vendor: You ain't gots the money ya' ain;t gettin the hot dogs.

P: Give me a hot dog!!! Here's the money!! ::throws $2 to the vendor::

Vendor: ::throws hot dog::

Phibrizzo: ::catches hot dog:: Yummy!! *eats it right in Lina's face* hehe

Vendor: What do you have?

Lina: I have gold coins. Can you tell me, what're dollars?

Vendor: Just give me 100,000 GOLD pieces then. ^_^

Lina: Ok!! ::counts out coins 1 by 1::

*1 hour later* Here you go!!

Vendor: thanks....*gives 1000 hot dogs and leaves*

Phibrizzo: *wakes up* Huh? wha? What happened??

Sylphiel: *Is playing cards with Zelgadis* Miss Lina just bought her hot dogs.

LINA: Sylphiel.....this isn't an ordinary game of dodge ball...

Phibrizzo: *Cuts her off* Come on! Lets begin!!

Sylphiel: Hold on please Mr. Hellmaster. *to Zelgadis* Go Fish!

Zelgadis: *grumble grumble....picks up card* I never win this game....

Phibrizzo: *pulls Sylphiel in to ring* Now lets FINALLY begin!! Ahem, ANNOUNCER!!!!

Announcer: Selphiel!! Come on down!!

Sylphiel: Umm....excuse Mr. Announcer, it's Sylphiel, not Selphiel.

Announcer: I'LL SAY IT ANY DAG GAMN WAY I WANNA!!!

Phibrizzo: grr.....*puts on cutesy face* Lets PLEASE begin now Miss.

Lina: *eating hot dogs* Umm...*chomp munch* ya' might wan*slobber*na tell her how to *slurp* play this.

Phibrizzo: Umm...Miss Lina....don't talk with your mouth full.

ball: *launches at Sylphiel*

Sylphiel: *catches ball* did I win?

Lina: No Sylphiel, you lost

Sylphiel: *bouncing ball* I was never good at dodge ball...*dies*

Xellos: UNO!!

Zel: I lost again!! *sob* Card games just aren't my thing.. How did you beat me???

Xellos: *does 'Now that is a secret' hand motion* Now that is a secret! *extra cards fly out of his sleeve*

Everyone: *gasps*

Xellos: Now....the loser has to play....52 card pick up.....except it's with....260 cards!!! ^_^

Zelgadis: But you cheated!! *groan*

Xellos: *throws cards*

Zelgadis: *groan* *picks up cards*

Cheerleaders: Boom check out the girls with the butts!! Boom check out the girls with the butts!!
OOpcha wala wala, Oopcha bangbang, Oopcha walawala, OOp. Ya' really really wanna kill the people, ya really really wanna make em die. Ya' really really wanna, make the ball hit. Ya' really really wanna.......SO DO IT!!!!! *scampers over to Zel and throws cards he just picked up*

Zelgadis: *groan....tries to blast cheerleaders with a flare arrow* Why me... *picks up cards again*

Cheerleaders: *scamper off*

Phibrizzo: Looks like our next contestant iiiiiiiis......Zelgadis!!!

Xellos: *slaps Zel's back making him drop cards* Good Luck!!

Zelgadis: Pick up the rest Xellos!!

Phibrizzo: *drags Zel by his cape in to the ring*

ball: *launches towards Zel*

Zel: Fireball!!

ball: *flies away* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Furby: Uh Oh!! Ka Listen!!

somebody: Who's Ka?

Furby: Hey doo no eh eh doo

Zangulus: *walks in with a pizza* Hey guys! I ordered a pizza!! *looks around* This Party is so......dead....lets liven it up a little!! ::brings in the Mazoku band::

band: (which consists of Gaav on the drums, Valgaav on the electric Guitar, Mazenda on the keyboard, Zellas on the other electric guitar, Water dragon king on the Bass, Saegrum on vocals)

band: "let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the... *symbol sound 4 times* FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Lina: *sings annoyingly again to block out the horrible sound*

Zel: *standing, waiting for game to continue*

Phibrizzo: *stress mark appears on forehead* Go away...... *snaps fingers at band sending them all in to oblivion* Yaaa!!! They work again!! *hugs fingers* *turns towards ring with evil look* Lest begin now!!

Zelgadis: *goes on the defensive*

Phibrizzo: *throws ball*

ball: *hits Zelgadis on the head*

Phibrizzo: I win again!! ^_^

ball: *flies back and hits Phibrizzo in the head*

Phibrizzo: *knocked in to pizza*

Zangulus: Hey!! I was gonna eat that!! *sob* *whine*

Cheerleaders: Boom check out the girls with the butts!! Boom check out the girls with the butts!!
Ho hum, Is this game done? Doo Dup, HURRY UP!!

Phibrizzo: *sits up* eeeew......I'm covered with greasy, disgusting, slimy, red sauce.

Cheerleaders: *cleans Phibrizzo up* *scampers away*

Phibrizzo: *flies back to the ring, eating a slice of garbage pizza* Ok, *chomp* Lets continue...*alarm clock goes off*

Toddlers: *run in* YAAA!!! IT'S TIME FOR BARNEY!!! *runs Phibrizzo over*

*is watching Barney*

Barney: Hello again to all my friends!! blah blah blah blah...the fun and learning never ends, here's what we did today!!

toddlers: *cheer*

Phibrizzo: No! The....*gasp*...happiness! I....*choke*.....help....*aargh*..can't handle....*cough*...cheerfulness ::is rolling in agony on the ground::

Lina: *singing* I hate you, you hate me lets gang up and kill Barney! With a gun to his head, pull the trigger and he's dead! First he was purple now he's red!!

toddlers: *cry*

mother: *walks in* Time for nap! *toddlers leave with mother*

Phibrizzo: *gasp* Thank you...Lina Inverse.....

Lina: No problem! Of course who could resist the beautiful, smart, famous, sorcery genius...Lina Inverse!!

Phibrizzo: Of course that doesn't mean you're out of the game...

Lina: Ya' know...this games really getting annoying...

Phibrizzo: Actually I'm having much fun!! ^_^

Zangulus: Aargh...where'd my pizza go!!

Xellos: *chomp* ya' know...this stuff is pretty good. ::is holding empty pizza box::

Zangulus: *cries over the pizza box* That was my first, and only pizza!!

Phibrizzo: *teleports Zangulus in to ring* Lets begin!!

Zangulus: *goes in to fighting pose*

ball: *flies towards Zangulus*

Pikachu: *runs in and thunderbolts the ball* Pikaaaa!!!!

ball: *kills Pikachu*

Phibrizzo: Oh!! ^_^ Look at the cute yellow rodent!! Watch it blow up!! hehe!! ^_^

Zangulus: Oh no!! ::kneels by Pikachu's body:: After all those years of training....you're gone now...WAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!! I was supposed to die!! Not you!! *sob* It's no fair!! And I spent so much money on all of that food!! It was the....the.....gourmet kind to!!

Phibrizzo: *sweatdrop*

Lina: *sweatdrop*

Zangulus: Now all I'm left with is this.....this....Magikarp!!

Phibrizzo: *facefault*

Lina: *facefault*

Ash: Pikachu!! Where are you!!??

Zangulus: You mean....you're not my Pikachu? Yipeee!!!

Ash: *picks up Pikachu* Oh no.... *drops Pikachu* Who did it!! Was it.......you!? It WAS you!! *pointing at Lina* Listen Mr., but that Pikachu was good to me and some stuck up boy like you running around in a silly outfit isn't going to get away with this!! You, you.....evil guy!! You must be a part of Team Rocket!!

Lina: Mr, you are in Big big trouble....*stress vein*

Ash: *puts down hand* Go Bulbasaur!! Bulbasaur Razor Leaf!!

Phibrizzo: *sweatdrop* umm...I was playing a game of dodge ball here...

Ash: Now now! This is a Pokemon battle!! Send out your Pokemon Mr!!

Bulbasaur: *attacks* Bulba!!!

Lina: Before I do the dragon slave....FIREBALL!!!

Ash: Hey! This isn't a pokemon battle!!! You're supposed to use Pokemon!!

Zangulus: Here....use my magikarp Lina.

Lina: Umm....what can I do with this thing? It's a.......fish...

Phibrizzo: *sigh* This must end now.... *snaps fingers*

Ash: *dies*

Bulbasaur: Bulba! Bulbaaaa!!!! Yey!! I'm freeeee!!! *RUNS TO ZANGULUS* Bulba, bulba bulba? will you be my new master?

Zangulus: Bulba Bulbasaur Saur Bulba!! sure!!

Phibrizzo: Come ooon!! *whines* we need to finish this game!! *sends ball at Zangulus*

Zangulus: BULBAAAAAA!!!! I mean AAAAAHHHHHH!!! *gets hit and dies*

Bulbasaur: BULBASAUR!!!! *uses razor leaf, cuts up ball*

Phibrizzo: Next up....the small chested girl!!

Cheerleaders: Boom check out the girls with the butts!! Boom check out the girls with the butts!!
Phibrizzo is the best!! Better then the rest!! And he makes fun of Lina's chest!! *throws bras at Lina*

Lina: Darkness beyond twilight, Crimson beyond blood that flows!!!

Cheerleaders: *scamper off*

Phibrizzo: It's just you me and Xellos now!!

Xellos: *playing solitaire*

Phibrizzo: But we're missing a ball now.....so.... ::grins over at Xellos::

Xellos: Hm? wha... *look of realization on his face* well.....ok! This should be fun!!

Phibrizzo: *rolls Xellos up in a ball and throws him at Lina*

Xellosball: Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! ^_^

Lina: *dodges* FIREBALL!!

ball: *follows Lina*

Lina: *hits xellosball with furby*

Xellos: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

Lina: *runs*

Phibrizzo: *rolling on the ground in laughter*

*xellosball and Lina running/flying around Phibrizzo who is still on the ground*

Lina: *hits xellosball with stuffed tiger then runs again*

Xellosball: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! ^_^

5 hours later.....

Lina: *hits xellosball with stuffed polar bear*

Xellosball: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! ^_^

Lina: *is cornered*

xellosball: *floats in front of Lina and, sticks out an arm and tickles her::

Lina: HAHAHAHAHAAHEHEHEHEHEHEH... *LAUGHS*

Phibrizzo: ok Xellos.....you can get her.

Xellosball: *hits Lina's chest*

Lina *dies*

Xellosball: *flies around, hitting random people*

Cheerleaders: Boom check out the girls with the butts!! Boom check out the girls with the butts!!
He's bad!! He know it!! He's cool!! He show it!! *kisses Phibrizzo*

Phibrizzo: Yipee!! I have a new ball, many dead people and some cheerleaders all in a few days!!

Xellosball: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! ^_^

Daddy: *storms* WHAT'S ALL THE RACKET!!! I NEED SOME PEACE AND QUIET!!! SO.....SHUT UP!!! *storms out, dragging Phibrizzo with him and the Xellos ball under his arm.*

Phibrizzo: *snaps fingers* not again....*snaps again and nothing happens* Damn this mortal world....

There will be a sequel!!! So read it when (if) it comes out!!

Cast (these are the insane, psychos who came up with this thing....)

Amanda: Lina, Xellos, Zelgadis, Amelia, Furby, Mazenda

Lona: Cheerleader #2, Zangulus, Sylphiel, Martina, Gourry, Gaav, Water dragon King

Nikki: Xellosball, cheerleader #1, hot dog vendor, announcer, Ash, Pikachu, Bulbasaur, toddlers, mommy, Barney, Saegrum, somebody

Jenn: Phibrizzo (^_^), dad, Valgaav, Xellas

Sophie (the cat): as herself (the ball in disguise)

We were all the ball at some point, most credit goes to Nikki.

---

Well, there it is! Feel free to post any comments you have on it! ^_^

I'm going to give you the one comment that I can come up with after reading the first few lines and decided that I couldn't read the rest with a clear conscience.

The pseudo-script format is not working. The offensively done capitals at the beginning don't either. They make my eyes bleed. If you insist on maintaining a script-like formatting, use something other than asterisks to denote action. For example, parentheses or italics. Also, when denoting an action, don't use the character's name, followed by a colon, followed by the action. The best way I can explain to use how it should be done is to give you an example.

---------
John, smiling: Hey, Sally! How are you today?

Sally looks up from the book she was reading.

Sally: Oh, hi there John. I'm good how are you.

John pulls out a chair and sits down.

-------

That's just a small example. And if you want to indicate that someone is speaking at a heightened volume, try something like this...

John, shouting:

instead of the capslock.

Oh yeah. Sorry for not actually reading and commenting on the content. sweatdrop

Well, just because someone else typed it up for you, doesn't mean you can't improve on it a bit. whee