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Fall of The Black Flame

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 12:07 pm


Well,the names and spells are ripped off,but I couldn't think of any others.What do you think?
namChapter 1:Adventures Beginning
Ramza had served the Royal Family as long as he remembered.He was ever-loyal,and bore on his back the mark of the Black Flame.He was master of both spells and brute force,carrying a finely smithed Sword of Ice,which when,albeit with great use of his strength,could go ablaze with blue flames..His stave was of great skill also,topped with an Emerald taken from the heart of the great Ogre of Paladinstir.It was wreathed in magic cord,and on the bottom bore a ruby which had great proficency with Fire element spells.
His Apprentice,Delita,was not as greatly skilled,but Ramza beleived he could become
one day.Delita wore a simple stave ans simple sword,but was fearsome in battle.
He and Delita had been sent to Karkonia to fend off some of Prince Zargek's Knights.
While he and Delita were on the horse-driven wagon to Karkonia,the passed a ridge.
And from the ridge came an arrow which struck their driver's neck.Without a guide,the
horses took off in a gallop and rode off the ridge and toppled into the wilderness below.
Both Delita and Ramza blacked out from the fall,and the next day found themselves in
a great forest.
"So,Delita,have we any horses left?"asked Ramza,calm even in the situation.
"Yes,one,the other three died or ran off.Even that one has a broken leg."said Delita.
"This is a good time to practice your spells.Try Cura on it."
And even Delita's meager knowledge of spells proved enough to mend a leg.
They set off at a steady pace to find a stream.
After a day's walk,they found a silent stream,and Ramza instructed Delita to search for firewood and rocks to make a fire pit.Meanwhile,Ramza took out a bow and went hunting.When he returned,Delita was boiling water over a fire in a bowl.
He had also caught two fish.
Ramza had killed a deer and accidentally a wolf.
"Why the wolf Ramza?"asked Delita.
"It attacked me"explained Ramza.
Then they ate and went to sleep in a crudely constructed tent.
PostPosted: Sun Feb 04, 2007 5:13 am


vic48
Well,the names and spells are ripped off,but I couldn't think of any others.What do you think?
namChapter 1:Adventures Beginning
Ramza had served the Royal Family as long as he remembered.He was ever-loyal,and bore on his back the mark of the Black Flame.He was master of both spells and brute force,carrying a finely smithed Sword of Ice,which when,albeit with great use of his strength,could go ablaze with blue flames..His stave was of great skill also,topped with an Emerald taken from the heart of the great Ogre of Paladinstir.It was wreathed in magic cord,and on the bottom bore a ruby which had great proficency with Fire element spells.
His Apprentice,Delita,was not as greatly skilled,but Ramza beleived he could become
one day.Delita wore a simple stave ans simple sword,but was fearsome in battle.
He and Delita had been sent to Karkonia to fend off some of Prince Zargek's Knights.
While he and Delita were on the horse-driven wagon to Karkonia,the passed a ridge.
And from the ridge came an arrow which struck their driver's neck.Without a guide,the
horses took off in a gallop and rode off the ridge and toppled into the wilderness below.
Both Delita and Ramza blacked out from the fall,and the next day found themselves in
a great forest.
"So,Delita,have we any horses left?"asked Ramza,calm even in the situation.
"Yes,one,the other three died or ran off.Even that one has a broken leg."said Delita.
"This is a good time to practice your spells.Try Cura on it."
And even Delita's meager knowledge of spells proved enough to mend a leg.
They set off at a steady pace to find a stream.
After a day's walk,they found a silent stream,and Ramza instructed Delita to search for firewood and rocks to make a fire pit.Meanwhile,Ramza took out a bow and went hunting.When he returned,Delita was boiling water over a fire in a bowl.
He had also caught two fish.
Ramza had killed a deer and accidentally a wolf.
"Why the wolf Ramza?"asked Delita.
"It attacked me"explained Ramza.
Then they ate and went to sleep in a crudely constructed tent.


Not bad. However, you don't space correctly...
And we need more of the story to pass judgement.

Xx_Murderous Doll_xX

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