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 Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 6:46 pm
I'll start off with the first one >=)
Sign that you've chosen a "No Frills" airline
1. Tickets are sold through lottery terminals
2. At the airport all the insurance machines are sold out.
3. Before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot.
4. You can't board the plane unless you have the exact change.
5. Before you take off, the flight attendant tells you to fasten your Velcro.
6. The captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas.
7. When they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking.
8. The captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway
9. All planes have both a toliet and a chapel.
10. No movie. You don't need one. Your life keeps flashing before your eyes.
11. You see a man with a gun, but he's demnading to be let off the plane.
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Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 6:47 pm
Things you don't want to hear during surgery
Better save that, we need it for the autopsy
Accept this sacrfice O Great of Darkness
Hand me that....uh.....that uh....thingie.
Come back with that! Bad dog!
Ooop...! Hey has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before!!
You know, there's big money in kidneys, and this guy's got two of them.
What do you mean, he wasn't in for a gender change?
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well, folks, this will be an experiement for us all.
Ok, sho I've had a few drinkish (hic).
Wait a minute, if this is his speleen,.....what's that?
Damn! Pg 39 of the manual is missing.
Sterile, schmerile. The floor is clean, right?
What do you mean, he not insured?
Don't worry, it probly sharp enough....I hope..
The foot bone's connected to the leg bone....
Fire! Fire everyone get **** out!
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Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 6:49 pm
Signs when you know its time to get on a diet
You are diagnosed with the flesh-eating virus, and the doctor give you twenty five more years to live.
You put mayonnaise on a aspirin.
You dive into a swimming pool and your friends say, "one at a time, please."
you go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts.
You dance, and it make the band skip a beat.
You go into a restaurnat, and the waiter asks you whether you want a bill or an estimate.
Your driving licence says " Picture continued on other side"
You learn you were born with a silver shovel in your mouth.
You could sell shade.
Your blood type is Ragu.
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Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 6:51 pm
Hahahaha this is a funny one=
The airplane was taking off when the pilot, making a routine announcesment, suddenly screamed: "Oh, my God!"
A few minutes later, he came back on the intercom and apologized if he had scared any of the passengers. He explained: "While I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my trousers!
One of the passengers said "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!"
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Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 6:56 pm
XD hahahahaha, hmm i ran out of jokes :/, o well i'll think of something quickly ;p
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 1:41 pm
i understand all of them XDDD
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 8:27 pm
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 8:32 pm
DUDE TOO FUNNY COULD BREATHE
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 8:57 pm
DUDE THATS HELLA FUNNY WHERE DID U COME UP WITH DIS STUFF rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl blaugh blaugh blaugh xd xd xd xd rofl rofl blaugh blaugh blaugh xd xd xd xd xd xd xd xd xd xd xd blaugh blaugh blaugh blaugh blaugh blaugh blaugh
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 9:02 pm
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Posted: Mon Jan 01, 2007 9:03 pm
I just come up with jokes at random, i got like a thousand more XD rofl rofl rofl rofl , thnx for the complement ^_^
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Posted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 2:49 pm
Lol. Love the jokes. rofl
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Fire Flash Alchemist Captain
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Posted: Sun Feb 11, 2007 7:29 pm
Let me say now, no racial comments.
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Posted: Sat May 12, 2007 5:58 pm
ahahahaha!! i like thoses!!! they had me rolin!!!!
ok i got one its relly bad though!
ok so theres to muffins in the microwave... one muffin says" wow, it hot in here" and the other muffin says "Ahhhhhh, a talkin muffin!!!"
do u get it cause they bof talk but rally muffins dont talk but here they are and a talkin muffin is scared of the other talkin muffin!! or at least that sounded right when it was in my head!!!!
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