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Heh. Well, this has been troubling me for quite a while, then I thought "Wait! There's probably a guild for this!" So here I am, confessing my love issues.

To be blunt, it's probably what you've all seen before. But, I'll get all the details out.

Alright. So I was in 8th grade. I met a girl near the end of the school year, and we hit it off pretty well. We were in the school play together, and she shared pretty much all my interests. We became pretty good friends, but we weren't close enough to really hang out during the summer at all. 9th grade began, and we would often pass each other without acknowledging each other. In time though, we started talking again, and about halfway through the year, I figured I had a crush on her. By now, we were great friends, but still not close enough to hang out. o_o

Well, I lived like that for awhile. We had tons of inside jokes, and always had plenty of fun when I was around her. Unfortunately, there came a point when I was extreeemely stressed, and that was bugging me. A lot. Also by this time, we had been talking online pretty much every night. I told her I liked her, and well, it's never really been the same.

It's the middle of 10th grade now, and it's still frustrating. She's my best friend now, and we've hung out often. But, she still knows I like me. And for this reason, it's just different. However, we've never actually talked about it in real life, which bugs me a lot. She doesn't want it to be "real", so she runs from it by only talking through text and leaving it behind. I know I'm forgetting a lot, but it's really frustrating.

She's interesting with the way she handles her relationships. I know several reasons whyit won't happen. She'll never date a best friend, especially one as close as me. She's had problems with that, and to her, when a friend statrs to like her, they become "unsafe". That's in her own words too. They become "unsafe", so everything she does, she's afraid to hurt them. That's where I am now. It's even more frustrating, because she's a naturally cuddly person, y'know? There's always her guyfriends always tickling her, playing with her hands, hugging her, cuddling, etc. It's just annoying, because now that she knows I like her, none of this is with me. I'm not horny or anything, it's not like I wanna touch her, (o_O) but the uncomfortability issue is what bugs me. When we're in a car, we never seem to sit by each other. Or on roller coasters. Or anywhere. She simply won't hug me, unless I offer it.

By now, I'm convinced it's love. I really don't want that, but really, that's what it's become. She's always on my mind, and she just doesn't feel the same. I wish there was something I could do to make her like me, but I can't. I KNOW I need to move on, and I keep trying to. But, there's something there. There's a magnet on her that just naturally attracts me. =/ No girl has ever done that for me, and that magnet keeps me sticking. It's, well, hard.

This is probaby completely typical, since it happens a lot with people. =) But hey, any advice? If you have questions about the situation that could help, just ask. Because, I know I've left stuff out. x_x

While that does make sense, to just stop seeing her hardly seems like the right thing to do. She is my best friend, and I'm not just saying that by the way I feel about her. Yes, she does have issues. In fact, she's had a pretty crappy life, which is why she has so many protective problems. While I want to be with her, I also want her to be happy, and she needs a friend. After all, she's never really had any until high school. I know she's not perfect, but she has that aura that just attracts me. =/