I was raped three months ago while on holiday in the south of France.
To cut a very very very long story short it was reported to the police, he was found, locked up, i had to be interveiwed about 5 times and then go see the judge and i was on anti H.I.V medication for a month.
I'm finding it hard to get over it all. I have nightmares often and after someone (who was very involved with my case) Told someone else that he thought i'd given my consent, i got big doubts about it all. Questioning myself over and over if because i'd been so drunk i'd passed out if maybe that meant i'd somehow given my consent...Anyway i have nightmares about it now, someone shouting at me over and over saying i gave my consent and that no one believes me. I also have dreams where i'm being followed and grabbed from behind and taken off somewhere.
To make it even harder for me i have to go back to France soon to see the judge...But this time he'll be there too. In the same room. About 5ft away from me.
Even the thought of that makes me feel sick and start to panic.
I'm on Flouxetine but some days i don't feel like i want to go on living.
I suffer from Anorexia which makes things even harder as the more i hate myself the less i eat.
I just wondered if anyone else has ever had to sit in the same room as the person who raped them?
As i suffer from serious panic attacks i just don't know how i'd cope.
To cut a very very very long story short it was reported to the police, he was found, locked up, i had to be interveiwed about 5 times and then go see the judge and i was on anti H.I.V medication for a month.
I'm finding it hard to get over it all. I have nightmares often and after someone (who was very involved with my case) Told someone else that he thought i'd given my consent, i got big doubts about it all. Questioning myself over and over if because i'd been so drunk i'd passed out if maybe that meant i'd somehow given my consent...Anyway i have nightmares about it now, someone shouting at me over and over saying i gave my consent and that no one believes me. I also have dreams where i'm being followed and grabbed from behind and taken off somewhere.
To make it even harder for me i have to go back to France soon to see the judge...But this time he'll be there too. In the same room. About 5ft away from me.
Even the thought of that makes me feel sick and start to panic.
I'm on Flouxetine but some days i don't feel like i want to go on living.
I suffer from Anorexia which makes things even harder as the more i hate myself the less i eat.
I just wondered if anyone else has ever had to sit in the same room as the person who raped them?
As i suffer from serious panic attacks i just don't know how i'd cope.