Practice your bombastic skills here!!
Bombast: using elevated diction to say something not so elevated. (B.S.ed definition)
Because of the immense amount of dihydrogen monoxide accumulated through the use of a manufactured piece of glass in the shape of a cylinder with a half of an ellipse attached on the side, my bodily fluids threaten to flow out of me in a torrentous flood from the digestive organs onto dirt and minerals unless I do not commence to the nearest dihydrogen monoxide disposer immediately.
In other words, "I need to use the bathroom."
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