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A guild for teenagers covering topics centering around teen sex, pregnancy, puberty, and other aspects of teen life. 

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SLAyEr66woot

PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2006 8:46 pm


Well first off I just turned 15. Now thats out of the way i lost my virginity about 4 weeks ago. I Used a condom my cousin got me but now im not so sure if it worked. How am i going to deal with this if my girl friend is pregnant. Her parents dont really like me and she carries a very good straight A student kind of image with my parents. I dont want this to ruin our relationship and I know ill be by her side if she is pregnant.
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2006 9:58 pm


Anybody. Maybe some advice I could give her through you guys would help to.

SLAyEr66woot


Nikolita
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2006 11:52 pm


In a word, wow.

Few things.

1) If you're not ready to be a parent, stop having sex. Use a condom every time, get her on birth control, and understand that even then she can STILL get pregnant. Be mature, be responsible, and sit down and talk about it. If the consequences and risks of sex (possible pregnancy, abortion, etc) outweigh the good points, it'd be a good idea to wait until you're both more mature and better prepared for anything unplanned.

2) Before you freak out whether or not she is pregnant, get her to buy a couple of pregnancy tests and take one. If it's negative, wait and take the 2nd one. If it's positive, she should get herself to a doctor asap, and ask for a blood test. From there she'd need to tell her parents, and talk to her doctor about her options.

Then go from there. But there's no point in freaking out until you know whether or not she's actually pregnant.

And while you're waiting...

You're only 15. I'm guessing your girlfriend is the same age? It'd be incredibly stupid and naive to presume that your relationship would not change one iota if she were pregnant, because I/we can almost guarantee that it will. Especially if you don't know whether or not you have family support, future plans, finances, etc, because any or all of those factors can cause a split in any relationship, let alone a teenage relationship where the people involved might be parents-to-be.
PostPosted: Wed Aug 09, 2006 12:25 pm


Ill tryo get her to buy the tests. Shes really embarased about the whole thing. We have a very good relationship almost 3 years. I think it will probally keep going as long as I dont do anything stupid like I did. It was my Idea to have sex annd she just wanted to make me happy. I kinda feel bad now. neutral

SLAyEr66woot


Zamy

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 09, 2006 3:59 pm


Before I say anything on the subject, I want to say I am glad you asked for advice. It shows that you are trying to be responsible. I also think you made a good call in wearing a condom.

But, I think you may be doing this (having sex) a bit early. I know many teens are having sex and some do not end up making a baby. But many girls do end up pregnant. I myself being 19yrs am ready to give birth to my first child any time now.

What I'm saying is please don't make the same mistake alot of teens (including me) are making. If you're not ready to be a parent and your partner isn't ready either, then don't do the action that will make you one.

If you guys are in the mood and you want to have sex, try out a few things that won't get her pregnant like oral sex or something. If you don't want to do that and all you body wants is sex make sure you have as much protection as possible.

She can go to a doctor without her parents knowing and get birth control pills.
(all though personally I would suggest her to not sneak behind her parents back, and be truthfull with them. Or least her mother. You both are at the age were you both want to try new things out in relationships and who better to help you out then your parents or a doctor?)

But I understand some parents might freak out, so you two should do what you think is right.

Always remember though there's no such thing as safe sex. There is always a chance she can get pregnant, even if she's using the pill and you're wearing a condom. It's rare, but it still happens.

Like I said before though, I'm glad you are trying to be responsible about this. Can you do you girlfriend a favor though, please make sure she wants to have sex too if you guys do it. I don't know you, but I know alot of guys who like to pressure there girlfriends to do it. So, please be a gentleman and make sure it's what she wants too.
PostPosted: Wed Aug 09, 2006 6:59 pm


I asked her and she said if it makes you happy and I said well do YOU want to and she said sure. It wasant the most confident answer. One of her older friends 25 to be exact got her one of the test things. I dont know if she took it or not but her friend called me to let me know.

SLAyEr66woot


SLAyEr66woot

PostPosted: Wed Aug 09, 2006 8:54 pm


Btw my dad just walked in and read this thread while I was going to the bathroom. I heard a somewhat loud What the F#$k. Im now grounded from the computer and probally from seeing my girlfriend. xd If I live through this ill see you all in a week or 2.
PostPosted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 9:38 am


On top of the advice that Zamy and Nikolita all ready touched on, I'm going to advise getting into a sex education class BEFORE you push her into sex more.

I'm sure you didn't mean for it to be forced on her, but just the way it sounds on her part and yours, it seems like it was more your idea and she felt pressured. If she's too "embarassed" about the whole thing, maybe it's a wise idea to refrain from sex. Sex is a very intimate and open issue, where communication is VITAL.

lunashock


Zamy

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 12:22 pm


lunashock
On top of the advice that Zamy and Nikolita all ready touched on, I'm going to advise getting into a sex education class BEFORE you push her into sex more.

I'm sure you didn't mean for it to be forced on her, but just the way it sounds on her part and yours, it seems like it was more your idea and she felt pressured. If she's too "embarassed" about the whole thing, maybe it's a wise idea to refrain from sex. Sex is a very intimate and open issue, where communication is VITAL.


I completely agree with lunashock on this one. Sex Ed can teach you about STDs and other things you might not be aware of yet, and show you the consquences (sp?) that come with having sex.

Sex also shouldn't be a hush hush thing between you guys either. You two need to talk about it to make sure this is what you want.

You two might even want to go to a doctor for a check-up to make sure you don't have anything you may pass to your partner. *I MADE my boyfriend go get a check-up before I had sex with him. He said he didn't have anything, which he was right the results indecated, but it's better safe then sorry.*
PostPosted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 3:04 pm


My dad dosent know im on. She called me today to....shes NOT pregnant. I already know about STDs and all that stuff. I think ive been taking all of those classes up till high school which im in now.

SLAyEr66woot

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