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 Posted: Mon Jul 03, 2006 2:20 pm
Last month I got out of a rather terrible relationship. He lied to me, cheated on me, tried to cheat on me with someone else and failed, tried to cut me off from certain friends of mine who knew things he didn't want me to find out, glared me for so much as looking at the girl he cheated with for God-knows-how-long, he tried to control and manipulate me (and for a while it worked).
I know, I know. You all told me it would happen. You all told me not to come crying to you if it got worse. Well you were right, and I was wrong. So bask in that glory, all right? I get it. And I understand if you don't want to help me, and I understand if this thread gets deleted because I shouldn't be asking for help, and I know I shouldn't be asking. I deserve all that happened, for being so naive and believing it might actually get better, and for listening to your advice but not actually dumping him when I was told to do so. But maybe someone here is willing to help. And if they are, I'm willing to listen.
All I want to know is this: How can I get over all that's happened and move on with my life? How can I rid myself of the poison he has tained my body and soul with, and learn to trust again?
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Posted: Tue Jul 04, 2006 6:48 am
Some here may of told you to stay away from your current ex and you didn't. But that was just advise, and no one here is going to bash you for not taking it (I hope) It's your life and you needed to figure things out for yourself, and we understand that. Of course we'll help you, that's why we're all here! 3nodding Don't forget that this guild is based on informing and helping and it's not the regular forums with people who will tell you off.
So just to make things a hundred percent clear, no, your thread shouldn't be deleted, you need help, and no one is going to be mad at you for it!!
Now to your problem. I don't know how much time has passed since you two broke up, but I'm sure you know that time is the best thing. It may be long and horrible, but you'll heal yourself. In the mean time, I suggest distracting yourself from thoughts of your ex. Heck, it's summer! Go swimming, read, and I find writing in my journals helps A LOT. Join a sport or hang out with friends. Certain things will probably remind you of your old b/f, so try to make new memories of things with friends. The more you get out and mingle, the more chances for you to meet someone new, better and not abusive. You're strong and you can do this, and remember that trust will come with time.
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Posted: Wed Jul 05, 2006 8:37 am
Thing is, I think I may have found a guy I might like to go out with. Actually, I have a couple options (my first choice is a little stubborn about long-distance relationships). That's why I want to heal so badly, because I want to get right back in there! I just don't want to still be scared of guys when I do start dating again.
Thanks for the help, by the way. I'm sure people will disagree with you, though. The last thread's long gone, but I recall people telling me not to come crawling back here if things don't work out.
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Posted: Wed Jul 05, 2006 5:22 pm
Pink Snow Blossom Thing is, I think I may have found a guy I might like to go out with. Actually, I have a couple options (my first choice is a little stubborn about long-distance relationships). That's why I want to heal so badly, because I want to get right back in there! I just don't want to still be scared of guys when I do start dating again. Thanks for the help, by the way. I'm sure people will disagree with you, though. The last thread's long gone, but I recall people telling me not to come crawling back here if things don't work out. If that's true, that should not of been said! At least in my opinion, and I can't see our wonderful guild host ever tolerating those posts because no one has the right to deny you help and if they do, bollocks to them! If you have found a guy you're truely interested in, then go for it! He might be able to help you heal but you should make it absolutely clear that you just came out of a hard break-up so he's aware and can make a balanced decision as to whether he thinks he'll be able to be in a relashonship with you. Just do what you think it best and what you think will make you and your "new" guy happy. (Note: If the new guy is really interested in being with you and you decide you're not ready, please tell him why!)
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Posted: Thu Jul 06, 2006 4:56 pm
He knows abuout the relarionship, he's been with me the whole time. Well, the whole time the thing turned to crap in my hands, that is. And not "with me" with me, we were just friends! The reason he won't go out with me is because we live too far away from each other and he doesn't like long-distance relationships.
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Posted: Mon Jul 10, 2006 1:10 pm
Pink Snow Blossom He knows abuout the relarionship, he's been with me the whole time. Well, the whole time the thing turned to crap in my hands, that is. And not "with me" with me, we were just friends! The reason he won't go out with me is because we live too far away from each other and he doesn't like long-distance relationships. awww, that's really too bad from your end. You might just have to stay as good suportive friends, and there's nothing wrong with that 3nodding As the saying goes, there are plenty of fish in the sea. wink
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