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 Posted: Sat Apr 29, 2006 1:29 pm
Okay, I'm writing a script and here the plot. Your jobs are to tell me if it sucks or to start now.
32-year old power hungry buisness man named Drew Johnson learns that his girlfriend from high school had his child soon after he left when he was 17. Now goes back to Watertown, New york, the small city where he was raised to meet his 15 year old daughter. He sees his old friends and parents for the first time in 15 years. All of them are ashamed of him. He asks himself if his life really is worth it as he deals with his cold, distant daughter who refuses to go back to New York city with him. Mostly a father-daughter thing. What do you think?
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Posted: Wed May 03, 2006 3:13 am
May I ask, what has he done in 15 years, hasn't he fallen in love heart with someone else, had other children evil ? What about the daughter, idea does her character follow more of the mother's or her fathers character?
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Posted: Wed May 03, 2006 3:42 am
the_weird_1 May I ask, what has he done in 15 years, hasn't he fallen in love heart with someone else, had other children evil ? What about the daughter, idea does her character follow more of the mother's or her fathers character? He is a womanizer, has a lot of girlfriends. But no wife or other children. The daughter is more like her mother in a sense that she looks down at her father's new way of life.
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Posted: Wed Aug 09, 2006 1:33 am
Ritz_Freak the_weird_1 May I ask, what has he done in 15 years, hasn't he fallen in love heart with someone else, had other children evil ? What about the daughter, idea does her character follow more of the mother's or her fathers character? He is a womanizer, has a lot of girlfriends. But no wife or other children. The daughter is more like her mother in a sense that she looks down at her father's new way of life. Ohhhh! The conflict!! wahmbulance Maybe the father can teach the daughter to enjoy life a little more carefree and the daughter can teach the father more responsibility? That sounds a little stereotypical, doesn't it? So what happens next? Do you know? question
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Posted: Fri Aug 11, 2006 5:14 am
Hmm ... I'm not sure whether this idea 100% falls under the cliche category but it sounds very I-seem-to-have-heard-it-somewhere-before ... ah well, as long as it's good, who cares? The idea is workable with I guess ..
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Posted: Fri Aug 11, 2006 3:34 pm
sheri8 Hmm ... I'm not sure whether this idea 100% falls under the cliche category but it sounds very I-seem-to-have-heard-it-somewhere-before ... ah well, as long as it's good, who cares? The idea is workable with I guess .. Hmm, yeah. I was thinking the same thing. Alot of these types of stories have been done before. For example I think Uptown Girls (mind you I haven't watched this, but I've seen some scenes and gotten the gist of it) would sort of be the same type of story. Where there is an older figure who tries to teach the younger one to enjoy life more. If you could take your story and create a surprising twist on it, then it may be more original and interesting. Well, let's see. He's 32 and a power hungry business man, what makes you think that kind of person would willingly and right away go see his daughter in New York? Perhaps he sees this as a business opportunity. Also he's a womanizer, perhaps he has a girlfriend and maybe she gets pregnant. What about the mother how dos she fit into all this? There's alot of things to think about, I think you should map your story out a little more.
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Posted: Sun Aug 13, 2006 9:40 pm
Heres when they first meet:
Judy: Ellie, come here and meet your father.
(Ellie stops. Drew looks up at her and they stare at each other. Ellie breaks the silence.)
Ellie: Grandma, I have work in half an hour. I got to go.
Judy: you can miss work right?
Ellie: (Looking at drew) No. (She goes up the stairs)
Judy: Isn't she just so pretty? She has your eyes you know.
Drew: (Looks up the stairs) Where’s her room?
Judy: Where your room was, darling. Now your father isn't home yet but would you like something to eat?
Drew: (Going up the stairs) No thanks mom.
Judy: Well then, I'll call you down.
(Drew goes upstairs to a long hallway. He goes to the door and knocks. He hears no answer so he turns the knob, finding it locked. He smiled a little and pulled a bobby pin out and worked it into the lock. He heard a click and opened the door. Ellie was sitting at the window, staring outside. She looks tired.)
Drew: Ellie (walks toward her. She looks up at him.)
Ellie: What the hell are you doing here?
Drew: (Looks very uncomfortable so he sits on the bed, his old bed.) Look, your mother-
Ellie: I know she’s dead.
Drew: Right, but you need a place to stay, so-
Ellie: Oh please, your not trying to be a parent now, are you? Well you can stop pretending to worry. I'm staying with grandma.
Drew: *Sigh* That’s what she told you?
Ellie: I haven’t heard differently, or is it opposite day everyday here?
Drew: Its not that fun here. Anyway, I offer for you to stay with me in New York City.
Ellie: Well I'm sure you know my answer.
Drew: (smiles) Good then we leave in a week
Ellie: Are you always this much of a jackass? I mean no.
Drew: No what?
Ellie: (Gets up) I don't have to deal with you. I have work. (Leaves the room)
(Drew follows Ellie down the stairs. Halfway down he grabs her arm.)
Ellie: Stop trying to act like a father now. Its too late for that. (Tries to move away)
Drew: (pulls Ellie’s arm back) Would you just listen to me for one second.
Ellie: ******** YOU (Ellie pulls away and walks down the stairs. She falls and passes out, falling down to the bottom of the stairs. Drew runs down the stairs)
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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 2:40 am
Angry!!! evil twisted evil twisted
I can see that he's a bit passive and she's the firebrand! wahmbulance wahmbulance
I guess now that she's hurt she'll have to leave her job anyway and move in with him??????
My own dad died when I was little and I had to live solely with my mum, after the funeral and wake I literally had my boxes to move half way across Australia to where mum was living at the time with her own mum. Very traumatic. I am 26 now, and for a whole decade I still wanted to 'go home'. A little something about me that you probably didn't want/need to know, but I'm just sharing why Ellie is already relating to me! Please write more.
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