(IC RP) Li Jun Has New Threads

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Li Jun's New Threads: I am Flowery Uncle, full wardrobe.
Li Jun is laying on his back on his dojo tatami, feet up on the shoji framing gently, as he smokes a tobacco pipe.
He takes a puff, then breathes it out as a circle by rolling his tongue in the center of his mouth as he breathes out.
He takes another inhale of smoke, then exhales it out his nose.
Li Jun: "I have got the cutsey-wootseys, the kawaiis, and the elites. So, I've been through some things. How did founding Plumeria, the freelance shinigami guild, trigger such extreme hacking? I was simply minding my own business as a Shinigami-in-training, and Wiiumbrella wouldn't let me in, so I founded my own guild instead. Then, we got extremely attacked by hackers. Simply because I'm named Li Jun, and my guild is named Plumeria? What part of Li, Plumblossom is the second most common Chinese name do they not understand? There's probably tons of Li Juns. I'm not even Li Houjun, just Li Jun."
Li has some smoke, then sings Wonho's Crazy as he occasionally smokes, "!"  

[Dorjidruk]

Dorji is sitting at a kotatsu in the dojo, using his laptop, "Maaan, your charisma is awesome. I have to restore all of our accounts."
Chiet sits at the kotatsu, "Dad... I need a computer."
Dorji orders an immediate delivery of a laptop for Chiet, and one for Jun, too, "It will arrive soon, dear. You, too, Jun. You each get a school laptop."



Hazel heads out to pick up the laptops from the store, as he is the deliveryman.  

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Li Jun breathes smoke out of his nose while he receives his laptop from Hazel, "Thanks. I finally have my school laptop." He smiles: biggrin .
He sits at the kotatsu, then gets up, and pulls Coconet into Plumeria, the hat world the dojo is in.
Coconet grabs all the lunch and breakfast cards for school, except Li Jun's, from on the table Dorji's seated at, "We're going to need these today."
She then looks around with a dropped jaw at the gigantic dojo more than large enough to host an entire martial arts competition, not just a class.
Coconet whispers in awe, "Why is it so big?"
Coconet then gets snarky at Jun, "Are you trying to compensate for something?" stare
Jun puts an arm around Coconet's shoulders, and turns their backs to Dorji's, having his tobacco pipe lit in the other hand, and takes a breath of smoke, breathing it out his nose at her, "No, I'm advertising, obviously. biggrin Just kidding. stare Yuh envy muh dojo, Nets? biggrin "
Coconet glowers at Jun, "Well, it's obviously for the whole orphanage! So, I don't mind. What kind of school do you go to dressed like that?"
Jun blows a smoke ring in Coconet's face, "Wiibaru Academy. Like my captain haori?"
Coconet looks bored with Jun, "I'm not interested in your little Shinigami first year guild."
Dorji cracks up laughing, "You guys are so good at Chichiri and Nuriko. I'd believe it."
Coconet: "Well..."
Jun breathes smoke out of his nose as he answers, "Nani?"
Coconet: "Not you! I was saying! Dorji, are you taking us in for the early riser breakfast?"
Dorji: "That started 42 minutes ago. Sorry. You all missed it. Also, Jun is doing grouphome parent classes and goes to Wiibaru Academy as his primary school. He's becoming a psychopomp. I guess he'll specialize in psychiatric of the orphanage, keep a grouphome, and sometimes go out for field work with his kids. That's what Cookie's up to, too."
Dorji lights up another smoke pipe, "I could do with some smoke. You guys gotta get ready for school."
 

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Li Jun rolls out his new pink yoga mat, and uses his computer-tablet-thing on it's kickstand to follow a YouTube yoga routine to the best of his potential, and pretends to be leading a class, "Alright, guys! My imaginary yoga class, let's get flexible! Yoga time!"
The YouTube Yoga Routine: .  

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Dorji shows a count of thirty kids on Jun's chart to Jun: "There's thirty kids in your chart, not even counting the Venus. When you count all of it, it's over fifty kids total. You're going to grouphome assistants with assistants and/or kids when you grow up. You're going to have a huge grouphome."
Jun: "Okay. Are you sure I'm not going to be prolific?"
Dorji: "Haha. Sure. You're a grouphome Dad."
Jun: "I could sire over fifty kids."
Dorji: "No! They're going to mostly be a grouphome, I guarantee it."
Jun: "What if I become a donor?"
Dorji: "No. See? It says Eleventh House Haume in Saturn, it says you're going to be a grouphome dad."
Jun: "Oh. Well, I didn't know that."

 

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Dorji shows Jun all fifty-two kids in his birth chart "There's fifty-two total. Plus, you'll have fifty-two each cycle, and you'll cycle five times before you reincarnate again. You're going to be a father of 260 minimum in your lifetime before next incarnation. There's probably more planet kids, too, we don't have familiarity with. That's a lot of parenting in one lifetime."
Jun: "In my fifth cycle, I'm going to relocate to a longer life chart, such as New York, to further extend my years before reincarnation. Forget only 5 cycles! I'mma aim for immortality!"



Jun: "Are you sure I'm not going to become a king and have over 260 kids in my lifetime?"

Dorji: "No, of course not! You're going to grouphome over 260 kids in your lifetime."
Jun: "For a rain god... You're sure raining on my parade."
Dorji: "Well, yeah, that's my job. I guess I'm doing a good job."  

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Li Jun tells Dorji: "I think I've uncovered immortality. If we relocate between charts every time we're in last cycle, it should restart us in a new relocation chart so we can live forever. That's Azazel's secret! I figured out how these older gods live thousands of years endlessly! They move every so often, and it renews their astrology to a new set of cycles."

 

[Dorjidruk]

Dorji: "Definitely! That makes sense! That's how they do it! We'll have to relocate every so many hundreds of years to keep our current location's potential from running out! That's going to be exactly how people like God and Azazel go on forever like they do! And, it's going to be how Emperors have hundreds of kids by forty-years-old. It has to be true that when we relocate between chartzones it starts our charts over in the new housing from scratch, so we can live on forever, and so we can be more prolific. Though, in cases of men like us, it isn't siring, it's grouphome parenting. Though, a small portion of the kids, I'm sure will be genetic instead of fostered."

 

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Dorji looks at the clock on his laptop, "Time for school. I'll see you kids after school." He takes Coconet with him out of the hat.
After everyone needing to go to public primary school is out of his hat world, Li Jun sinks out of his hat into wearing it, on top of his car onto the street, in a kneel on the car roof.
Jun then walks off his Scion's roof onto it's front hood, then down onto the ground.
He spins his car keys on his finger, then catches them in his palm, before unlocking his car, and getting into the driver's seat.
Jun then drives to Wiibaru Academy, taking Cookie's Early Riser class with him as they are in the hat world dojo.
 

[Wimer-Blanchard]

Li Jun is eating breakfast in the cafeteria, and Cookie comes out of his hat behind him, then removes his hat to let his class out, "Out we go, Kids! Time for breakfast. Sorry class ran slightly into breakfast time."
The cafeteria watch as a very large class of students exit the hat before it's placed back on Li Jun's head, then they leave him to get breakfast.
Wiibaru Matsuri sits next to Li Jun at the table with his own breakfast, "Wiiumbrella is having problems from hackers. You're trying to join Wiiumbrella is why you're under attack. We're considering you for our guild still, but there's lots of people trying to bullshit that they're the real you to get in."
Li Jun drinks orange juice as he watches Matsuri leave, "Weird. Considering you have to be a shinigami to get in."
Matsuri turns back to him, "Yeah, I know. But, you kow we're famous among our plane, so every time someone requests to join, loads of impersonators harass us from Hell, Purgatory, and A-life."
Li: "I was pulled from Heaven by my legal parents. My Mom's side are Purgatory."
Matsuri: "I know. I checked. Isn't fun to be good in Purgatory, is it? There's gonna be impersonators all over you and your join request, because your folks have you in Purgatory. Loads of Purgs are going to end up in Hell."
Li: "You guys already know me. I'm already in the cast, and have always been around the guild my entire life. I was born neighboring the headquarters."
Matsuri: "I know." biggrin "We saved you a lot from ghosts among the living. I gotta get back to class before time to start."
Li: "I'll see you in class."
Matsuri leaves for class.