xxxxX AISHA HAWKINS xxxxxx xxxxxxAge - 28 xxxxxxFace-claim - Zazie Beetz xxxxxxOpinionated. Insecure. Funny. Dependable. Cautious. Selfish. xxxxxx"I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It's so ********' heroic."
Updated - mm/dd/yyyy Accepted by - Weasley 9/28/19 Updates accepted by - (crew signature)
Posted: Thu Sep 26, 2019 8:25 pm
xX BASICS xxxxxx
Nicknames - None Birthday - March 13, 1991 Age - 28 Hometown - Garland, Texas Gender - Female Blood Type - A Positive Body Type - Short, stocky, muscular, pear-shaped Notable Traits - Natural hair, small scar on left cheek Inventory - Mostly empty first aid kit. Two and a half bottles pain reliever. Six bottles allergy medicine, two non-drowsy, three 24 hours. Three bottles mucinex. Cordless electric kettle. Approx. 100 individual herbal tea bags (assorted). 4 tins instant coffee. Roughly 1/2 pound granulated sugar. 1 jar nondairy creamer. 2/3 jar local honey. 10 spicy chicken Cup O' Noodle. 3 cans Campbell's Chicken and Stars soup. 10 cans green beans. 2 pounds homemade trail mix. 3 cans Febreeze. 3 rolls toilet paper. Sledgehammer. Glock 26 (no ammo). 3 notebooks. Various pens.
xX ABOUT ME xxxxxx
Education and Employment x■ Graduated high school 2010 x■ Attended DCCCD on and off, dropped out early 2014 x■ Nanny to twin girls 2013-2017 x■ Nanny to 5yo boy, 3yo girl (at start date) 2017-present Hobbies x■ Video games x■ Dancing x■ Writing poetry Likes x■ Spicy food x■ Cartoons x■ Children x■ Loud music x■ Tea Dislikes x■ Winter x■ Being outside x■ Men x■ Dirt x■ White People Food(tm)
xX RELATIONSHIPS xxxxxx
Sexuality - Straight Status - Single Family x■ Friends x■ Enemies x■
OPINIONATED - Aisha has a lot of thoughts on the world. She's not always quick to share them, but you best believe that she's thinking them, all the time, very loudly. Whenever someone she disagrees with speaks up, she tends to try setting them on fire with her mind rather than involving herself in an argument, but pushing certain buttons will result in her flying off the handle. She's like a kettle left to boil then, and will generally start ranting and won't stop until she's said everything she has to say on the subject. Attempts to interrupt will be ignored and met with louder yelling. She can and will scream herself hoarse if pushed too far.
INSECURE - Having been in a long-term relationship with a man who could charitably be called an a*****e, Aisha's not a particularly confident person. Logically, she knows that she's not stupid, and that she's attractive by certain standards, that she's kind and good and all those things people strive to be (or at least convince themselves they are). But, the voice of reason in her head is all too often drowned out by her ex's, constantly belittling her and condescending to her. She frequently has to take time to herself to actively argue with the voice, trying to remind herself that it's lying to her. Some days are more successful than others.
FUNNY - Aisha doesn't exactly know how to connect to other people. All interactions with members of the opposite sex were heavily monitored by her ex, and he didn't particularly like most of her girl friends. Generally, she feels awkward around people, and the only way she knows to combat that is to seek validation, specifically in the form of laughter. Laughter, she figures, can't be argued with; if she's making someone laugh, that's an obvious sign that they're enjoying her presence. And if they're laughing at her, well, that's fine, she probably is, too. She's very self-deprecating, but always turning it into a joke, both to protect herself and to try and make others find her funny, rather than annoying or otherwise undesirable.
DEPENDABLE - The one thing Aisha has always had going for her is that she has been available, and can always be counted on. She's used to being the shoulder to cry on, the extra set of hands, the person you know will be willing to help you. She's built an entire identity around being there for others, and generally, once she makes a promise, she keeps it. Her ego suffers horribly when she fails to follow through, so she makes it a point to do so. She borders on obsessive about it, in fact, and sometimes has to be told she needs to let things go. Even then, she's prone to stubbornness.
CAUTIOUS - Aisha never got very far with rushing into things. The last thing she rushed into was her relationship, and that didn't end particularly well. Although, she's alive and he's not, so that's nice. Still, living with an abusive boyfriend teaches certain survival skills. She knows how to read a room, how to minimize herself, how to look before she leaps. Her anxiety and insecurity work overtime to keep her out of dangerous situations. Unfortunately, they're a little overzealous, and she's prone to fearfulness as a result. She's not terribly brave, and will generally vote to sit out of things altogether rather than risk it.
SELFISH - For all her dependability, Aisha is a very selfish person at her core. She does things for others because it validates her, not really because it helps them. Reciprocity is the name of the game, in all things; she helped you, now you need to help her. She's willing to part with supplies, but only in what she perceives as an even trade. She's willing to do for others, as long as they'll do unto her. And, if push comes to shove, she's the first to abandon someone to save her own skin. The only exception is children; being a nanny, and the oldest child of a rather large group, she has a soft spot for anyone under 10. Besides, they can't be expected to fend for themselves, or to pay their debts. She is not, however, above holding those debts over their parents.
Strengths and Weaknesses x■ Aisha believes firmly in quid pro quo. If she owes you, she'll do anything to pay that debt. However, she's never going to let someone off the hook out of the kindness of her heart. x■ She is actually very intelligent, but she's hesitant to trust her own instincts due to years of being gaslit by her ex. x■ Aisha sees things as very black and white; her convictions are strong, but so are her biases. What can charitably be called integrity can also be called inflexibility. Fears x■ Large men x■ Dying slowly x■ Suffocating Special Skills x■ Decent cook x■ Good with children x■ Extensive (unprofessional) medical knowledge, both pharmaceutical and homeopathic
Posted: Thu Sep 26, 2019 8:27 pm
xX BACKSTORY - PRE-OUTBREAK xxxxxx
spaceAisha's childhood was hectic, to say the least. She's the oldest of four siblings, and had countless cousins on top of that. Her family was very close-knit, all living within a fifteen minute drive from one another, if not on the same block. Being the oldest, she was often left to watch all of the younger kids, with very little help from her male twin cousins, who were the next oldest. She struggled a lot in her youth with her identity, mostly because it seemed very much defined by things outside of her control. Everything from her race, her age, her gender, her family, seemed to be used to put her in a box, one that she was never really sure she fit in. But, every attempt to look beyond those boundaries was met with a struggle. Her family couldn't afford to indulge in her soul-searching, so she was left mostly with things she could do in the privacy of her own bedroom, which wasn't much, with three younger siblings.
spaceHigh school wasn't so bad, because while she was still always broke, she had friends who were not, and were willing to pay her way for things like movies and, on two memorable occasions, concerts. She still had a hard time settling into anything, mostly because she found she liked a little of everything, which seemed to bother people almost as much as her liking the wrong things. As far as her studies went, she was smart enough, but lacked support. Her grades faltered in any subject she wasn't naturally gifted at, most especially social studies because she could not for the life of her keep names and dates straight. The only class she did particularly well in was English, because she was creative and good at analysis of text. But, she was never particularly encouraged in these endeavors, mostly because no one in her life saw much value in them.
spaceShe ended up attending community college, tuition paid entirely by government grants that ran out all too soon. She worked a few jobs here and there, but it was never really enough to move out of her parent's house. Especially once they started charging her rent and bill money, since it made it harder to save anything. Once she hit the end of her government assistance, she realized she was going to be stuck if she didn't figure something else out. Luckily for her, her boyfriend Samuel had a plan. Seeing as most of her money was being spent paying rent to her parents, and helping them with bills, if she could remove those expenses, she'd be able to pay for her own classes. He told her she could move in with him, and he wouldn't charge her anything to do so, since he could already pay his own bills just fine. She could focus on school, and he'd handle everything.
spaceAt first, it seemed perfect. She'd rushed into things with him, maybe, moving in with him when they hadn't been dating very long, but they were friends before they started dating, and got along very well. Unfortunately, she realized shortly after she'd moved in that he'd been lying about how much money he made at his own job. Most of his bills were paid for with money from an inheritance, which was quickly dwindling. At just past the six months mark, he needed her to start helping with bills, which meant she couldn't take as many classes. Then, he lost his job, and she had to drop out altogether. Originally, she was supposed to start school again when he found a new job. But, what ended up happening instead was that she got offered a better paying job as a nanny. She was able to pay the bills just fine on her own then, though there wasn't much left over for food and such.
spaceSam eventually got another job, but was only working part-time, and spent a lot of his free time delving into various hobbies that he swore he would eventually turn into a career. Aisha was skeptical, but she wanted to be supportive. Throughout their relationship, Sam had gotten more and more defensive about his own habits, and more and more critical of her. By the time he was trying to learn how to make prop weaponry, she had learned not to argue with him, and kept her thoughts to herself. Still, sometimes something in her snapped, resulting in arguments that could last for hours, and silent treatment from him that lasted for days. They had the cops called a couple of times, but she would never speak out against him to anyone else.
spaceIt took Aisha a long time to realize that just because he'd never put his hands on her, did not mean that Sam wasn't abusive. She realized it through her second nannying job, where she watched the mother of the kids live in a similar situation to her own. Slowly, she began to realize that the woman was being abused, and that her husband's behaviors were disturbingly similar to Sam's. She had only just begun planning on leaving him (with help and advice from her employer, who was in the middle of a divorce by then) when the outbreak happened.
spaceAisha was, rather unfortunately, with Sam when things reached their corner of Garland, and thus ended up stuck with him for the early onset of the outbreak. She wasn't terribly thrilled, but she was also too afraid to try leaving him. They eventually integrated into a small group on the edge of town, holed up in a warehouse with little in the way of amenities but plenty of floorspace and very few windows or doors. The things that made the place such a good safehouse eventually made it dangerous, however; noise from their coming and going attracted a horde, and once the dead got in, there wasn't much to be done. Aisha and Sam were in the clear to escape with a couple of the other group members, but Aisha, fueled by desperation and adrenaline, say an opportunity and took it; she snatched Sam's gun from him and shot him in the chaos. When asked about it, she claimed he'd been bitten; it wasn't a stretch for the other two survivors to believe that he would've lied about the bite and hidden it from them, so they didn't worry too much about it. Shortly after, Aisha abandoned them both to save herself from another group of the dead.
