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 Posted: Fri Nov 23, 2018 8:13 pm
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Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2019 12:22 pm
Hello again, Kaname! It is I, Poods, here to crit your Quest!
From the Name down to the Hobbies looks good! I think she looks ready for some Brawl! (oh ho ho!)
For the Virtues, both pair well together, it reads that she fully believes she is the best, when you combine Confident and Earnest together. And being cocky would just naturally flow from that. It all being fueled by jealousy just makes her seem like a very well rounded character!
However, they all need to be fleshed out a little bit more. Specifically, with being Envious of people doesn’t seem to work well with knowing and truly believing she’s the best, because then that means she does have doubt there that she doesn’t earnestly believe she’s the best. Instead, you could write that she feels jealousy towards those people because how dare they try to be better at her than anything, and that makes her work harder towards being the best at that thing she’s jealous about.
Just a little bit more, and then I can drop a stamp! As always, you can ping me with questions if you’d like!
Poods
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