Hi, my name is Lana...Lana Faust and I made a decision that made a lot of things in my life change. I fell in love with my best friend's boyfriend. They had been together for 4 years and I was a part of that. How? Because they were always fighting. Sure they had their moments and I was always jealous but I was glad to see her when she was happy. I felt like a translator for them. I understood him. It was like we spoke the same language from day one. Evey time they fought she would call me and I would call him and explain how she felt and then vice versa until the issue was resolved. After a while we grew a friendship. We always said it was a brother and sister relationship since we always teased each other and wrestled and we talked everyday about the most random things. Never in my life had I ever wanted or even tried to do anything to ruin their relationship.
I knew how much he meant to my best friend but then one day something changed. I was spending the night with them in their apartment and we decided to have an all nighter. We talked, played games, ate tons of junk, and listened to music. Of course my best friend crashed first. We stayed up and talked and wrestled but it didnt feel the same. It felt different. We stopped wrestling and my head was laying on his chest. We looked each other in the eyes and I immediately got up clearing my throat and moving to the couch. Needless to say things did change. The feelings I tried so hard to ignore and lock away deep deep deep deep deep down inside just started crawling out.
I ended up having to have a surgery a few months later and they would come and visit. We would text and then those started to change. He told me that there was something he wanted to tell me but that he wasnt ready to say it because it would change everything. I had a feeling I knew what it was but then i started to tell myself I was crazy. One day he came to visit me alone because my best friend got held up at work and I was feeling bored and lonely being stuck in my bed. He came and we talked. That's when it happened. We admitted our feelings for each other but we never cheated or did anything behind her back. The last thing we ever wanted to do was hurt her. I was willing to risk my friendship to be with him because I loved him and I had never had a connection with anyone like I had with him. Let's just say things were bad after that.
My best friend found out and now she hates me. Her and (x) broke up but are forced to still live together because my best frie....ex-best friend's family doesnt exactly like her and (X's) parents didnt have any room in their small apartment and neither of them had the funds to move out on their own at this point.
SOOOO here is our current situation. It has been three months since my ex-best friend stopped talking to me and she and (x) broke up. Me and (X) still talk and hang out secretly but were not dating....as much as I still wish he was mine. So she hates me and now makes (x's) life a living hell at home. She still thinks theyre gonna get back together so she is always giving him crap for talking to me and hanging out with me and last month she had blocked me on everything on his phone. So that happened. He unblocked me and we still talk and meet up but I feel so bad about how life is going for him. We talk to each other about everything. About how were feeling, what he is going through at home, how i feel about everything. We tried not talking to each other before and it was hell for both of us. We just cant be without each other. Our safe spot is a community dog park. Its actually just a gated playground behind a church that is always empty. Its like our little escape. We take our dogs there and we just sit on the playground and talk and goof off, steal a few kisses and just forget everything until midnight comes around and we have to go back to our hell of a reality. SO this our story. Do we give up on each other? Will I always be waiting for him? Will he finally get the courage to stand up to his ex or continue to let himself get treated badly? Will we finally just get together or will my heart be broken?
