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 Posted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 9:20 am
Being born female and wanting to be male makes me Transgender, right?
But also feeling one or the other depending on the day makes me Genderfluid?
But feeling like neither some other times makes me Genderqueer (I think?). . .
And liking both men and women makes me Bisexual.
So what does that make me? A bisexual transsexual queer. . . something? How about no?!
Having to find labels for myself makes me panic because then if I act a certain way or think a certain way that doesn't fit under that label (or labels) I feel like a poseur, and then try to find new labels.
I am just me, how hard is that? crying
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Posted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 12:58 pm
Then just be you. If someone asks if you're something say "No I'm me." Personally I have to label myself. Makes me comfortable
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Posted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 7:03 pm
Just be you! Labels just make everything confusing.
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Posted: Wed Oct 22, 2014 12:19 pm
War became a job
And love became a mystery
And heart and head were rent into two I think the thing I finally learned is kind of a two part project
First, you find what label fits you best, or perhaps what labels. Hold onto them for dear life, use it to get yourself a community and feel at home.
Second, know that it could change at any time. I used to think I was just genderqueer. I realized later that I was actually fully trans and that I wanted to transition. So I kind of became trans, but I'm also kinda genderqueer.
Hold it tight enough to let it mean something. Hold it loose enough to be comfortable letting it go.
Hope that helps! heart Fear and doubt began
And God threw up his hands
And the sky didn't know what to do
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TheCreatureOfHabit Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Oct 22, 2014 2:39 pm
I totally hear you, AvE. I'm kind of having the same problem myself. PriestessAmy's advice is comforting, as it's sort of the same solution I've blundered into myself. Until I know for sure, I don't feel I have the right to identify as anything. Being me is all I can do, but privately I consider myself transgender and have begun attempts to build a network in that community to seek advice and support (hence why I joined this group).
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Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2014 3:39 pm
Labels are tough. Sometimes I get frustrated reading various trans* things because of all the argument over labels. One person may feel totally comfortable with a particular word, but for another that word could be meaningless, useless, or even offensive. So to that end I think labels are a personal thing and everyone ought to be respectful of what people choose to label themselves when it comes to identifying trans*. It's so useless to get hung up on language (which is always changing and evolving over time) because then you get infighting. And sure, there can be disagreement, but people get so stuck on names and labels they miss more important issues - equality, education, understanding, and so on.
Most days I think "I'm Genderqueer." But other days "Genderfluid" sounds better. Then there are days I don't want a label at all. To people I interact with in daily life I am "Ellen" their co-worker, or "Ellen" the student, or friend, or whatever. I think the person I am is the most important, and appearing or behaving in any gendered way is unimportant to me. I know I can't force people to think that way about me - trans* is difficult for lots of people to wrap their head around, not because they're hateful but just because the concept is so alien to them - but I just keep in mind to be a reliable, fair, just person to those around me because I think being "human" is most important.
Gosh, sorry that turned into a ramble!
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