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Apparently this year we are once again NOT having Christmas on the actual day of Christmas...we've been doing it that way since i was a kid, but now all of a sudden that can't happen because family A can't be there or family B can't be there...well what if I can't be there on the day you choose? Everyone else can make it but I can't and that's ok...I get the actual day of Christmas off, so I don't have to fill out any papers begging off or for a half day or beg someone to switch with me I can actually BE there because where I work is closed that day...but I guess it doesn't matter if I'm there or not...I feel like just because I don't have kids, or a great job, or even fur-babies (my one cousins is a pet hoarder), that I'm not even worth their interest, that it really honestly doesn't matter if I am there or not, because if they'd of been paying attention they'd know I've been working weekends ever since I started my job...I know it sound selfish of me to be that way, but honestly, how would you feel if it's more important for others to be there, but it's not really if you are...it's upset me so bad every time I think about it I just want to cry my eyes out because I really feel like my family doesn't care about me at all...my brother doesn't give a crap if he's there or not, it doesn't matter to him, he doesn't really like family things any way, but it's always meant something to me! I guess I should just stop caring and become cold too and just say eff it, you don't want me there, fine, I don't have to be...and just never go to another Christmas or party or anything...and the sadder thing is, I can't even say anything because I'd be bi**hed at by my parents sad they probably don't care if I'm there or not either...I'm nothing much in their eyes, at a breakfast once with my moms brothers and their spouses, no one really talked to me, they were just interested in their grandkids and shh...I bet anything if I wouldn't of been there they may have asked how I was, but that's about it...I'm nothing special to them and there for, I guess I don't matter...it hurts so bad, but if I said anything it'd hurt worse cause all I'd get is laughed at or bi**hed at...I'm so done with family...