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 Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 4:41 pm
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:07 pm
 ---------------------------------------------------------------- Meeting Pains---------------------------------------------------------------- Azmaria and Amélie
Old post from 2007(ish)Kolina He never did return.
Sawyer...
That's who she was looking for. Sawyer. She had assumed he has left the pack to explore the vast unknown world that lay beyond the boundaries of the pack, but he neve did return and it had been several months. What could possibly be so exciting out in the world that would keep Sawyer away from his family for so long? Well, Azmaria was determined to find out as she searched for her brother.
She hadn't traveled far from home. Not yet at least. No, Az, shall we say, a bit timid and unsure of herself. She was nothing at all like her parents who were both outgoing and confident. Azmaria was taking things little by little and her first few days had only found her prowling along hte boundaries of the seaside pack before she finally got the nerve to venture out a little farther which led the young female into the packlands of the neighboring Outriders. She was none-to-concerned about being in this territory. Afterall, grandfather said that the two packs were friends and have never been hostile to one another even when pack members of the neighboring packs stumbled onto each others territory. It was one of the only other places, besides her home pack, that Azmaria could feel comfortable in.
So, there she was wandering along the boundaries of the outsider's packlands heading into the direction of the sandy beach where she was planning on taking a nice, afternoon nap by the ocean water. The weather wasn't as warm at this time of year, but bathing int he sunlight on the bright yellow beach helped to warm up her body so Azmaria wasn't going to let an oppertunity go to wast, especially since it may be one of the last time she got to enjoy such a luxury. If, she ever managed to pass that threshold into completely unknown territory that is. Eventually she'd get there; she reasoned with herself....eventually...
Right...?
Well there was no use swelling over such a thing. When the time came to leave Azmaria would know when it was. She didn't know how she would know, but she knew. For now she was going to enjoy herself.
The sound of the waves hitting the beach reached the teens ears as she picked up her pace. Finally she emerged from the forest and stepped foot on the soft shoreline of the outlanders beach. She stopped to stare at the scenery their beach had to offer before trotting through the sand to find an ideal place to rest. It didn't take her long to find a nice dune to rest upon near a large bunch of tall grass which did good work of blocking a lot of the wind while she laid beside it.
With a yawn and a stretch of her body, Az got herself comfortable lounging on the dune. Her body imprinted upon the soft, shifting sands of the dune as eyes fluttered shoft with a gentle yawn. Werewolf It was a rather chilly afternoon, despite the sun’s beams streaking across the sand dunes and melting the snow that had fallen the night before. Although she had never been very tolerant to the cold- Amélie found herself surprisingly delighted to be up and about. Her legs had been hurting her recently- but they had abated somewhat, perhaps due to Phib near locking her down in their den. She’d managed to bribe him for some time about, and now, she seemed dead set on getting a cold.
The young female tore down the beach, making small plumes of icy sand as she went. She’d dreamed again. Trouble loomed- but not yet. It always loomed, the seer had found, and she’d long since learned to cherish moments of serenity. Her blind eyes caught no light, but she seemed to maneuver with little problem as she hopped over stones and slid to a wild stop in the sands. The ice that floated on top of the ocean had been reduced to nothing but paper thin sheets that washed ashore like glass. Eagerly, she picked one up in her mouth, and carried it down shore to gnaw on.
Settling- it was lovely, she thought as her pink tongue traced across the mirror surface. It was a bit salty. But what of these dreams? Something to the west, yes. She would have to ask her sister about them. She shifted her jaw and crunched down on the ice, the sheet making a very satisfying crack as she did.
As she thought to herself and licked, Amélie became faintly aware of a...noise? In the back of her mind. It was the kind of noise she got when Meskeet was around, or Kaho, or Lera. But it was faint, and that was odd. Her eyes danced for a moment and she shifted, peering over her surroundings. Just a bit further down the shore, a strange female was resting on the sands. From her scent, she must have been from seaside- because she did not seem unfamiliar to her.
Eager to investigate, the grey stretched, and trotted towards the reclining figure. Quietly- she listened to the vague noise. It was thick like static. Kolina Now, Azmaria was usually a girl who could fall asleep practically anywhere as long as she was comfortable but lounging on the bech and hearing the waves and the little ice left crashing along the beach kept her up. Well, that and her mind which would not calm down no matter how much she tried. So, Az laid there, curled up against the cold air, nose tucked away under her tail as she continued to run things over in her head.
Was she going to head out anytime soon? Would it be better to wait until Winter had come and gone? Would mother worry? What would the pack think of her leaving? What if Sawyer returned while she was away?
Too many questions!
Az picked her head up and shook it trying to rid her mind of all the damn questions that would not stop plaguing her. Why was she such a worrier? Why couldn't she just be calm and relaxed like mothe. Why....stop it!
Snapping open her eyes Az abruptly halted her movements as she came face to face with a stranger. The wind had been to her dissadvantage for scent and the sand was so quiet to step on it was no wonder that the young teen hadn't heard or caught the scent of the strange gray femme. Eyes flickered with uncertainty as she rose to her feet. Maybe father was wrong and they weren't welcome on the outrider packlands? Oh, she hoped her wasn't because she'd be in some terrible trouble right now.
With tail tucked under her and posture low to the ground, Azmaria took no notice that this femme was blind. Afterall, she had never come across such a thing before. So, the young female showed her submission to the older grey as she spoke. "I...I am sorry that...that I trespassed. Father...said that our two packs were...I mean...if we're not I'll leave....but...I thought we were on good terms...and you wouldn't mind me...being here." Az trembled slightly some from cold and some from the fear that had crept into her heart. What would happen now that she was confronted? Was she in trouble? Would they chase her out of the packlands? Hurt her?! Werewolf Amélie approached the young female, her tail tucked low between her legs, but her neck up and ears alert. It was a peculiarly mixed signal, which probably didn’t help her peculiarly mixed ranking in the pack either. She was the alpha’s mate, but so far uninterested in any form of leadership. Soon one of the other females would get the idea and rise to power- but, Amélie had no concern towards it.
The noise still skirted around her head like a fly, but she could hear the other female’s nervous thoughts. She flattened her ears sheepishly and smiled, hoping to ease some of the worried female’s concern. Such trouble! She hoped she would not worry so. “Oh, no no-“ Amélie spoke, her body wriggling. “No trouble, I am just saying hello, yes?” She gleamed.
“Hige’s wolves are always welcomed here,” She continued, and sat herself down on the sand. “There’s no trouble. It’s cold today! Ice is breaking though. Seals will leave soon.” She rambled gently, her tail thumping. “I am Amélie. And you?” Kolina Azmaria watched the female curiously from her submissive position. What rank did this female hold within the Outrider pack? Right now, Az had no idea. Especially with how the strange grey femme was holding herself. This mix of authority only confused and frightened Azmaria a bit more. What was going on? She didn't like the unknown. Az liked knowing everything that was going on around her.
As she stood there, taking a step back once or twice, Azmaria got the strangest sensation. It felt as if someone was trying to...ease her? Well, it was more like a sensation she got whem around mother. It was a calm feeling though still held an air of uncertainty. The feeling was certainly not coming from her internally, that she could feel. So what was going on? Shaking her head, Azmaria took a few more steps away from Ameh and the feeling slipped away from her once she was several feet away.
At the sound of the femmes word, Az internally and externally cringed. er body was instinctively awaiting the harsh words that would surely come out of the grey's muzzle but no such thing happened. Green eyes gazed up and into Amelie's and she felt a sense of welcome and acceptance.
How odd...
Realizing that the stranger had given her name, Az slightly rose from her submissive position but didn't rise fully. "Um, I am Azmaria." She replied with a bit more confidence than when she spoke before. "So, I am not unwelcomed?" An air of relief wafted off the young she-wolf as she slowly mimicked Ame into a sitting position, head kept lower than that of the older female. Werewolf “Of course not!” Amélie dispelled, shaking her head. “You are always welcome here. I was just coming to say hello,” The silver female spoke, her white ears shifting from the crown of her head. The girl seemed troubled- more so then even Amélie could get at times, and she decided to lower the threat by laying herself on the cool sand. Her tail curled daintily besides her, and with a shift of her arms, she gently traced her tongue over her paws.
“You seem tired- are you alright?” She asked, her ringed eyes gazing forward stilly as her head bobbed about. This one- she was looking for someone? Strange thoughts bounced off of her head, but she could not read them as easily as she usually could. Somewhat bitterly, she lowered her eyes. She should never get so used to her own abilities like that. What happened to hesitation? And she withdrew, and tried not to poke further. Kolina Azmaria sighed in relief. So she was welcome here. That was a large weight off of her and the fear of being chased from the packlands flitted away on the salty sea breeze not to be brought up again...for now. No instead Tat was having other issues.
The sense of calmness began to drift over Az when Amelie laid down but that feeling was not to last long. Instead her head began to buzz and ache i she'd never encountered before. Sure she'd bang her head a few times when she was younger and hurt herself that way but the pain wasn't like this. It was almost a distant pain that didn't particularly hurt but wasn't the most comfortable thing either. With a shake of her head, Az rose to her paws and took a few steps away from Amelie just as the odd sensation dissapeared. This in turn made Az assume that the strange happenings was related to this femme.
"Are you the one doing that to me?" She asked in fear, unsure what to do if this femme was the one causing such discomfort. Werewolf Amélie licked her paws absently as the silence passed, for the moment unawares of the other female’s discomfort. She should ask Phib to get her a fish, she thought. It had been almost a day now since she’d eaten, and she found herself continuingly losing appetite. That wouldn’t do at all. She was thin, but she had no intention of becoming a skeleton like her sister. Briefly, she frowned and lowered her eyes. Poor Ryukkii! If only she would let her take care of her.
But then, the young girl spoke, and her ears pricked upwards. “Hm-?” She asked, in a slight daze. But that was before the girl’s own discomfort flitted into her own mind. She jerked back for a second and her eyes widened. It was almost like Hallie’s pain- but not quite as strong. How unusual! What strange things were happening in the forest? The female rose, and started to wriggle.
“No, no- not I.” She babied, and observed the female’s head while blocking her own empathy. “Have you felt like this before?” Kolina Azmaria slowly sat back down, but kept her distance from Amelie afraid that if she got close again the strange buzz and distant pain would start agian.
"No, never, not until I met you." She said, ears back against her skull in a frightened manner. What was going on? This femme seemed to have an idea what was occuring but didn't seem keen on letting anymore knowledge about the occurances out. Was there something wrong? Was she, Az, doing something that she shouldn't be? What could possibly be the cause? Was it this female in front of her? It had to be! Azmaria had never felt like that before. Werewolf Amélie whined slowly, and took a few steps back. She’d never thought her presence could ever hurt someone. A flush of panic, and she jumped back to the edge of the waters. “Does it still hurt now?” She called somewhat exaggeratedly from the beach. “I am sorry! I wasn’t doing anything-“ Had she been poking around. Oh dear! She supposed she had. It was getting too unconscious an action.
Had the other female’s mind reacted to her presence? “Does this hurt?” She asked, no longer yelling and speaking directly to the other female’s mind. “I am sorry- I never hurt anyone before. I fear your mind is reacting to me.” Kolina Azmaria looked at Amelie qith a quirked eyebrow when the femme scampered towards the waters edge. "Um...no." She said as she surveyed the femme curiously. What was she doing? It made no sense really.
Azmaria went to take a few steps towards the femme when pain shot through her head issuing a whimper from her as she stepped back with her body low and tail tucked beneath her. "Yes, that hurts!" She said more desperetly as she moved further away from Amelie, never really noticing that the voice she heard was inside her head. At that moment, Azmaria could only focus on the rather painful shooting pain in her mind. It felt like pressure against a wall that was beginning to crumble underneath all the bombardment.
"Whatever you're doing, please stop." Az whimpered as fear began to creep into her mind. What was going on? Why was it happening to her? Who really was this strange femme? Reacting to her? What? Werewolf “I’m sorry!” Amélie yelled again, and reigned her own mind in. Hopefully now it wouldn’t...what was it doing? Poor girl was just enjoying a day on the beach, and she had to go give her a headache. It was quite unusual! When Hallie had staggered in this way, she had already been troubled by the aches. But this poor girl seemed to be getting them directly from her? That didn’t make any sense!
Struck, she leaned to the side, and tried to think to herself. A few moments passed, and her head lifted again. “Does it still hurt? I’m not doing anything to hurt you! I’m sorry!”
"It must be something to do with your head!" She yelled across the distance. Kolina Continued through AIM RP:
x dramatic ash x: Azmaria slowly felt the headache ease as Amelie pulled herself in. The young femme had no idea that happenings that were going on, nor did she really want to know. All Azmaria wanted was for the pain to stop and stop for good. Her mind felt like it was being forced to do something it wasn't quite ready to do or willing to do at that point and ached in protest to whatever minstration Amelie had conducted. Now finally with Amelie reigning herself in the pain had begun to subside and Azmaria was able to think clearly again.
"No. Not as much now. It's going away." She hollared as she shook her head before peering up at the grey femme who had taken to yelling once again from the shoreline.
"My head won't protest with your assumptions." She yelled back before sitting on the sand, willing the headache to ease from her poor abused mind. "You don't have to be so far away you know. Besides, yelling hurts my head too.
Werewolfie: "Oh!" Amélie peeped, and turned her head about once as though to be sure. "I will come closer then!" She yelled in warning, and carefully slunk towards the girl. Without her mind picking up the careful vibrations around her, she stumbled clumsily, and her body occasionally lurched towards the sand as she fumbled. "I am very sorry-" She spoke again as she finally felt herself growing near- although without her mind, she couldn't be sure.
"Such things to be happening to your head! I cannot keep my own quiet for too long- but, I fear perhaps neither can you in time. You should be careful of yourself for a while. Headaches like that never bode well." She shook her head. That noise still flittered in her ear like static. Another seer? It was too faint to tell. Not a powerful pull like Hallie. But...something was lying dormant in this one.
X Dramatic Ash X: Azmaria looked up at Amelie as the older female spoke. The way she worded her sentences and picked out the words she said it very much sounded to Az, that the other femme knew what was going on. Why wasn't she saying? What was wrong? What could keep the femme from hiding her knowledge? If knowing would stop the headaches then why wasn't Amelie speaking?
Azmaria wasn't a girl to speak her mind. She preferred the background, being silent, being over looked and just a presence but her mind was fluttering with so many questions and worries that the most important of them all found its way to her mouth before she could even think to stop herself. "What is happening?" With that first question out a slew of others found the need to present themselves and none would take no from an answer. "You know don't you? What is it? Are you really causing the headaches? Is it something else?"
Werewolfie: Amélie shook her head. "I've never caused headaches before...I do not think I am causing them. But your mind might be of getting agitated with me so close. That is different- but I would never intentionally hurt someone." She spoke sincerely, shaking her head. "I do not know what is happening. But if I did, I would be cautious to say regardless." She was always cautious about what she did. She did not like to assume, and she did not like to pry.
"If I were assuming-" Amélie continued. "I would say that if your mind pulls back from mine, it is not like others, yes? So a mind unlike others must be taken care of. Sometimes there is a part of us that functions differently and wholely from the other. It would never harm you, but if it gets startled or overworked, it might cause headaches such as that."
"Nothing before like it?"
X Dramatic Ash X: Azmaria growaned pitifully and lowered her body to the sands. Curling her tail up along her body she rested her head on her paws as a heaved sigh of defeat escaped her. Now what was she going to do? IF this Amelie didn't know what was going on with her then who would? Was there someone out there that could help her or would she be alone?
"You're the first one I've ever gotten headaches around like this. It's so odd." She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment before fluttering them open again. "Maybe it'll go away if I ignore it." She mumbled. "I don't like different."
Werewolfie: Amélie nodded her head somewhat knowingly, and turned her head away. "It aches because it reacts to my poking. But I did not mean to look, particularly- sometimes, the head does what it does and I only half know it." She rambled. She still avoided saying the S word- she had rarely yet proclaimed herself to be what half the woods knew by now. "My mind can do many strange things. If your's can feel it, I would not be surprised if yours could someday do strange things as well."
"But, there's nothing wrong in being ordinary." It was all she had ever wanted, after all. "If it turns out that your mind will wake up someday and start looking on it's own like another pair of eyes, you must be careful how you let it go. Power can be dangerous, I think."
X Dramatic Ash X: "You're...poking?" Now this intrigued Az's cuiosity and aroused more questions but at the mention of strange things Az's ears promptly fell. No, she didn't like strange. She liked normalacy, consistancy, dependency, and the predictable. She didn't like strange and different inthe least. Sure, it was fine when others had strange and different quarks about them but she didn't want anything to do with it. She didn't like attention and being different meant attention.
"No, differen is terrible." She whined. "I don't like the spotlight."
Werewolfie: Amélie shook her head. "No, no. It has nothing to do with being in the spotlight. I don't think anyone should be in it for too long. People who get too much attention can forget who they are...or they can become bad, or make terrible mistakes in front of everyone. People want to steal the spotlight away from those who have it." She spoke softly, almost hesitantly.
"But, that doesn't mean being special is bad. It's all about how you handle it. If you seek the spotlight, you'll find it easily- but I think you will manage fine no matter what way you go. But you should be careful of your head aching. I don't know much of such things...but, someday, it could react even to a normal mind. And you have to calm it, or it hurts miserably." She remarked softly, remembering Hallie.
X Dramatic Ash X: Az sighed. "But I don't like to cause problems, and my...headaches will create all sorts of problems if they get as bad as you say they might. I can't imagine going around all the time with a headache just because there are others around me. I don't know how to calm it or stop it." She sniffed as she curled into a ball of misery. "I just want to go back to the way I was. No headaches. Maybe I'll be lucky and they'll go away." Werewolf Amélie frowned. “Maybe so. But...sometimes, things don’t want to go away. You’ll be surprised by how strong you are!” She remarked. “But, tiring, it is... you should rest here for a while, I am thinking. If the headaches come again, I could help calm them for a while, but I do not think it will fix them forever. We could send someone to Hige to let your parents know where you are. I do not think he’d mind.”
She turned and blindly looked out towards the sea. She remembered the time Rio and her had spoken to whales- and she couldn’t help but settle. “I do not think it shall be so horrible. Surprising things can come from trouble.” Kolina Azmaria looked at Amelie and sighed, ears dropping slightly. "I'll need all the help I can get if it gets worse like you said it could." She glanced out to the sea which caught the blind femme's attention. "I...I don't think grandpa Hige would mind me staying here for awhile. I mean, he talks about the Outriders in a very frienly tone and says we are in alliance with them..or something of the sort. I was never one to keep up with such details."
With a sigh, Azmaria rose to her feet. "I am not sure what good can come from this...but...well...I guessI'll see. I mean, I don't have any control over the headaches..." She lowered her head some. "I guess I should go find a place to rest. As nice as it is out here on the beach, the ocean is bringing in a cold breeze." Werewolf The seeress nodded her head. “Of course. It gets cold here when it darkens, but you should not be having much problems finding a place to stay. I will go see to Phib so he knows you will be visiting, and have someone inform Hige of it.” The female dutifully responded. Gently she walked a bit closer to Azzy, and lowered her head apologetically. “I am sorry for the pain I’ve caused you. I’ll make it up, I promise. I’ll help you figure out what is happening to you.”
“Until then though, let me find someone who can help you find a place to stay.” She chuckled. “I’m afraid I am not being so good finding dens with these eyes.”
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:08 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- Chat on the Beach---------------------------------------------------------------- Azmaria and Naib
Old post from 2007(ish)Kolina The sound of scrapping and breaking ice was a common sound along the shoreline at this time of year. It wasn't a pleasant sound by all means but it did mark the coming of warmer weather. Sooner springs was one of the benefits of having packlands to the south and few seemed to complain about the shorter and milder winters than those up north.
Azmaria found herself more than not resting on the beach of the outriders packlands. She had yet managed to find the courage to leave the pack but there was something else keeping her there. Amelie knew something. That strange, blind femme knew what was happening to Azmaria and the youth wanted to know what was causing her numerous headaches. It was so frustrating not knowing and not to mention inconvenient. If only she knew what caused the pain she might be able to prevent it.
So, Azmaria took to sitting on the beach not wanting to invade upon the Outrider's pack who were being nicer to her than needed. She didn't want to cause any problems for them so she strayed away from the main communal areas of the pack.
The cool sand under her paws drew the Juveniles attention as she dug her claws into the sand creating a small hole in front of her in which a tiny crab popped out of. Knowing all too well what the tiny shellfish were capable of doing, Az flicked a paw at the creature causing it to tumble away from her. Those claws of theirs were painful and Azmaria wasn't in much of a mood to feel that sharp pinch. Her poor nose and paws already had enough of damage delt to them by the tiny creatures. So, Az watched as the crab righted itself and scuttled away to bury itself again among the sand to await high tide. shia-san
'Why, hello.'
The young female loped up quickly across a sand dune on the beach, stumbling briefly, but keeping up her gentle consistency of steps. She hadn't seen another wolf around lately, but had never actually met all the pack land members to start with, so this collision was both a win-win for her.
The sands were chilled by this time, and each step she took, she felt a cooling sensation run right up her spine, black pads twitching with the contact. It had been, now, a good two or so weeks since her pups were born, and even so her body had gained its fit physique back, as well as its healthy glow. And it all showed as she slithered down the dune and leveled herself with the teenage wolf.
Azmaria had since pushed the crab off, and its tiny body bounding out of sight as Naib arrived and spoke out. Her tail slashed calmly side to side as her eyes glinted with glee. She was overly excited to finally meet a member on her own time, and not on the packs time when a meeting was called. Hastily, she spoke again, stopping briefly just a few feet from the female.
'I don't mean to startle you any, but I've yet to meet another member of the pack as of late--would you mind if I stayed a while? I wouldn't want to be some sort of bother to you though...'
Kolina At the sound of another's voice, Azmaria looked up from her musings sharply and turned her head enough to see another strange femme headed towards her. Unsure of herself, Az tucked her tail in so it sat close to her body and ears fell slightly along with her head posture. Green eyes gazed from the she-wolf to the ground. "Oh, um, you didn't startle me, but...um... I am not a member of the pack. Not really anyway." She shifted uncomfortably. "I am just staying for a little while." Until I get enough strength to just up and leave like I know I should.
Slowly Azmaria looked up at the older female before her eyes looked downcast again. "I am Azmaria by the way." She said softly as she subconciously dug a paw into the sand little by little. "I hope you're not dissapointed that I am not an actual member of the pack." She chanced another look up at the female as she said this, trying to get an idea of how the female felt about her. shia-san It wasn't hard to notice the obvious signs of her unsure stature as Naib reared up to seat herself. The female wouldn't take chances in scaring off this adolescent, so situating a few feet away, just to give the other some breathing room, Naib sat and glanced out to the sea.
'You didn't smell like the pack, but you were here and I only expected it...but its truly no matter! As far as I'm concerned, you're a welcomed guest to the land. Plus, it wouldn't have mattered if you belonged in the pack or not, I'd still would have loved to meet you.' Her slender form shifted slightly, comfortably trying to settle in for a while.
Her greenish gaze wandered to Azmaria finally, a gentle smile caressing her lips. 'Azmaria, that's beautiful. My name is not half the pretty sounding of yours, but its Naib.' Her voice cracked into a chuckle, and her tail swayed for a moment before curling about her side.
'So you say you're not really a member...is it that you want to join, or have intentions?' Her ears flicked forwards with interest, and a welcoming stare looked to Azmaria. The young wolf had nothing to fear in Naib. Kolina Az appreciated the space given to her and allowed the younger femme to relax a bit. Eyes and head rose a bit but not to a height that would be considered disrespectful. The last thing As wanted was to cause any problems.
"I am glad you feel that way." She shifted a bit more but in a more relaxed way as the tip of her tail moved in a cautious wag. "It's nice to meet others of the pack. I've only met Amelie so far."
"Naib? I like that. It's so much shorter than my own. Most don't use my full name and it always gets shortened to Az. Not that I mind, but it's not the nicest of sounding nicknames." Az happened to glance down, actually seeing the ground below her and noticed the iny hole she was unconciously making. She moved her paw away from the newly dug hole and looked up at the change of subject.
"Oh, I am not joining. At least, I have no intentions to. I came here thinking my brother might have wandered through your pack but he hasn't. That was when I met Amelie and she welcomed me into the packlands. I am just...staying here for awhile before I finally leave to search for my brother."
Feeling a bit more bolder around this femme who looked much relaxed and not near as skitish as Amelie, Az felt confident enough to ask some questions. "Who exactly is Amelie? What is her standing in the pack. If..if you don't me asking that is." She looked sheepishly. shia-san  So far, Naib too felt secure enough to speak out, though for now listened intently, eyes watching with a soft touch.
'Oh, yes. If anyone called me anything shorter then Naib, well I wouldn't be too happy. My name now has never suited me in my opinion as is, so Nai or 'B' wouldn't fly by me so keenly.' She shied off with her words casually, looking to the ground for a brief moment. 'So I'll call you by your birth given name, nothing shorter'
The female nodded, smiling all the while. It wasn't new to her to stay quiet for a long while and just listen, as she did now, so she was comfortable with it.
'Oh, I'm sorry you couldn't find him here. But I am glad Amelie welcomed you in, she's a nice wolf she is, very kind and warming. But you must do what needs done, and I hope eventually you find your brother soon.' She knew what is was like to have missing siblings, but she also knew what it was like to find them...such a good feeling.
Her ears flicked back casually, for she was more then willing to answer her questions as they came. 'Amelie? Well, I'm not honestly sure what title she holds, but she is Phib's mate; Phib of course being the alpha of the Outriders. And...other then her being blind, that's all I truly know.'
Reclining slightly, Naib tossed her foot into a clump of sand. That was probably not exactly the answer she wanted to hear.Kolina Azmaria smiled full heartidly. "Thanks. It will be nice having someone call me by my full name for a change. I was afraid I'd eventually forget it."
"Oh, it wasn't a complete surprise he wasn't here. I mean, I should have expected him to wander farther than the neighboring packlands. He's been gone for quite awhile so I wouldn't be surprised if he was long away from here." She sighed. "I'll just have to travel further...I...guess." Yea, Azmaria was far from confident with that idea.
"Well you know a little more than I do about Amelie. I didn't realize she was the mate of the Alpha." She pondered for a moment. "Wouldn't that make her the alpha female? I mean, that's how it is in my grandfather's pack, but I guess. that doens't mean it has to apply to you yours..I mean...sorry..." Oh how she hated when she was unable to get teh words out how she wanted. Why wouldn't her mouth just wait for her mind to decide what it should say?
"Um, so, you're new to the Outriders?" There a change in topic might get things rolling again and maybe it would help cover up her idiocy. shia-san Naib chuckled. 'I don't think you could ever forget a name like yours.' Her head bobbed knowingly. 'Its far to pretty.' Again, a smile appeared; seemingly that was her best way of showing happiness.
And, for a while Naib sat quietly and listened, feeling for Azmaria. Honestly, she felt the same about Sigrid and Rhes, who both could be scattered far and wide and maybe even out of this region. But it was no time to think of herself, when Azmaria sat here spilling her stories. Shifting her tail to and fro, Naib spoke up.
'Well there's always a chance he's around these parts. Maybe you'll find someone, who knows someone, who knows someone, who knows where he is?' Her tongue tied, but she chuckled softly, trying to lighten the mood. 'Just know that if anything else, you can always come back here.' Telk in general, really. This land was open for all wolves, and even some pack lands liked new faces now and again, even those of passersby’s.
Cocking her head, however, Naib realized this could be true. 'Well, no I guess your right; she could be considered the Alpha...but...it just doesn't seem Amelie. I think she might have a higher roll.' Naib received the same vibes she did when Rio told her exactly what he was capable of, so Naib felt for sure that Ame wasn't just the Alpha female.
'And no, I'm not new...per se...but I haven't met the pack really, just through meetings and even then I'm sitting aside. It isn't that they aren't welcoming, it's just I'm too shy when it comes to big crowds.' Kolina Az smiled softly. It was lovely to have someone who had such an optimistic view on life. Maybe she should take a page out of Naib's book and learn to look at things differently.
"Thanks Naib. I hope that I manage to find him someday. Hopefully it'll be soon." Rising to her paws Az look out at the sea before turning to look into the woods. Maybe diving right out there was best? Just plunge foreward and hope things turned out for the best. Yes, that's what needed to be done.
"It was wonderufl meeting you Naib and I hope we get to run into one another again soon." Az smiled and wagged her tail once before nodding her head and dashing off into the main territory of the Outriders only to cross over the well marked boundaries and into the land of the lone wolves.
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:11 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- What Was Lost Is Now Found
---------------------------------------------------------------- Azmaria and Sawyer
Old Post from 2007(ish)Kolina Lonely...
What else could describe the solitary life that Azmaria was forcing herself into? With each new wolf she met the pain in her head only grew worse. Only when she was alone was she offered relief from the pressure that slowly was building itself up in her mind. As much as her head felt better, Azmaria's whole self began to ache more in more ways than one.
It was obvious that the she-wolf was not well equipped to live by herself. Ribs protruded from her lanky form and her head hung low. Her social being was aching as well. She missed the company of others but dared not move to close to anyone in fear of the pain in her mind. Oh yes, Azmaria was being her lowly self and allowing whatever force there was out there to push her in whatever direction it wanted her to go without protest.
The sun had just begun to set and Azmaria was polishing off the remains of a small rabbit she had managed to catch. It wasn't often that the she-wolf managed to catch anything of her own. Rather instead she was forced to scavage what she could but today was like a feast for her. No bone went ungnawed as she attempted to rid every last piece of flesh from the little carcass between her paws. Finally content that there was nothing else she could possibly pick off, Azmaria sat up, licking her lips while looking down at the scattered bones around in front of her.
Azmaria sat there and gazed up between the canopies of trees to see the blood red sky of the setting sun. It was a pretty picture and she wondered what it looked like over the ocean. A sigh escaped her as she looked down, the thought of the pack she left behind still a sore part for her.
A touch on her mind...
Az's head snapped up as she felt it, unsure exactly what it was but the sensation was quickly lost as the familiar pang of pain poked the inside of her head. Someone was near.
Rising to her paws, Azmaria looked around her wearily, unsure which way to go to escape. Mimiee Elsewhere, a scraggily vagabond was suffering his own headache. After spending the winter as a vagabond, Sawyer had found himself tight pressed to find food, or anything else of interest really. Life had been a slow series of trips. Finding food, digging holes... he had not thought of home or the sea in some while now. It hadn’t occurred to him that his family might be looking for him. Nor had he ever thought much about home, or his sister. He thought about hunting, and he chased the neighborhood ladies- although at the outskirts of a pack, very few of them had an interest in running off with him.
He no longer had delusions of a wild life as a vagabond wolf- but he was rather settled into the nomadic life. He didn’t care much for pack life, although he was a social creature. He liked the strange wolves he was meeting, he liked the fights he got into, and he liked the newness of everything. It had been so long that he didn’t even realize he was beginning to travel home again, coat riddled with briars and a sluggish quirk in his face.
He’d met another traveler on his walks- a black female with a clown tail and ears; and it was she that he was looking for. They’d had a scuffle, but he was pretty sure he could get her to be a little more pleasantly affectionate with him if he came by again. Finding her was the hard part- and instead, he was stumbling upon the resting spot of a different kind of female.
The vagabond stepped out from the brush, and noticed the paler female looking at him from afar. He did not recognize her- at least not yet. “Hey, what are you lookin at?” He balked. Kolina Escaping to safety had been the only thing on the she-wolf's mind. The last thing that Azmaria wanted to feel was that terrible pain that never seemed to go away. Why couldn't she just live a normal life? Why were these headaches a persistent pain? Once again Azmaria's questions would go unanswered.
A rustle of leaves behind her was enough to warn the tan hued femme that whoever was near had found her. She turned just in time to see a skeletal wolf slip out from the ruffage before a stab of pain hit her. That attack upon her mind went completely unnoticed. Could it be? Could it really truly be? Azmaria stood there staring at the wolf in front of her. The words he said went in one ear and out the other as she just stared in bewilderment. After all this time! She finally found him!
"Sawyer..." Her voice trailed off as she continued to stare at the vagabond. Az could not understand how her handsome, happy-go-lucky brother could turn into such a sickly looking creature. Every bone showed and it was very apparent that Sawyer had been in many scuffles and fights. But he was still Sawyer! Right? Still Sawyer? Mimiee The wolf rose his head, and shifted the corners of his ears. The female was addressing him. Her voice...it was familiar, but in his abstract state of living he still had yet to recognize his full grown sister. “...do I know you?” The brown wolf remarked shadily, leaning his weight onto his left shoulder. From this angle, the large scar that crossed just above his temples seemed to catch light. He wasn’t repulsive- but not far from it either. The only part of his coat that seemed to stay clean was the bright white spots which littered his coat like snowfall.
“I ain’t told anyone my name.” The brown wolf muttered. “Who’re you?”
It was an empty demand, probably. Had Eris mentioned him? But, he hadn’t seen Eris in a while. Perhaps it was something else then. Harle? He didn’t doubt Harle had a big mouth, but she hadn’t seemed like the type that would have any benefit in bringing up his name in conversation.
Just who was this lady...? Kolina "You...you truly don't recognize me?" A sadness tinged Azmaria's voice as she looked upon her brother. Could Sawyer truly not recognize her? HAd it really been that long since they had seen one another? True they had both changed. Sawyer was barely the wolf that she remembered with all the scars her sported and his almost frail looking body, but she still recognized him. That chocolate brown fur, those white spots that were so remarkably like mothers, and his expressive eyes. Yes, she couldn't ever forget what Sawyer had looked like but apparently he had forgotten her.
Was life truly that hard for a vagabond?
Azmaria took another step closwer, ignoring that ever increasing pain in her head because right at that moment, her brother, Sawyer was in front of her. He had been the initial reason she left the pack. He had been the reason she had to thrust herself out into the vast unknown and make a living for herself as a loner. And, if Azmaria was a cruel wolf, He, Sawyer, could be the one to blame for Azmaria's increasing pains but Azmaria was far from a cruel wolf and such a thought had never crossed her mind.
With her tail hanging behind her and eyes just looking upon Sawyer Azmaria smiled softly. "Sawyer, it's me, Azmaria...your sister." Mimsey He held fast for a long moment, watching the female in front of him. It was curious- but he hadn’t the faintest recollection of who she was. Perhaps he’d run into her before? His head tilted curiously, and the lean bones across his back and shoulders slunk forwards. There was something familiar- but it was not so much that it even tickled the chin. And it had nothing to do with her looks- her voice seemed the only thing that was possibly recognizable from the rest of the clutter in his mind. The brown wolf licked his muzzle and watched the female approach at a distance- and wondered briefly if he should be concerned.
When she finally spoke of who she was- it took longer then probable for most individuals for the memories to flood back into his thick skull. Sister? He remembered mother... his silly brother with the weak heart... sister!
“My sister?” He questioned. He didn’t even remember her name, he found in slight surprise. How had he forgotten that? “What are you doing here? Why aren’t you back with mother?” Sawyer asked. Kolina Azmaria watched Sawyer closely and was pained to see that her brother truly had no recognition as to who she was. Hell, it didn't even appear as if he remembered having a sister and that little knowledge hurt Azmaria quite a bit. Afterall, Sawyer was the one she had come looking for. He was the reason that her life had become so hard. H ewas why...no, that was unfair. She had chosen to look for him. In truth, upon looking at her brother, that Sawyer could not really care.
Dipping her head with drooping ears and tail Azmaria whined softly. "I came looking for you. I was wondering how you were doing and why you never came home. I thought you were just going to explore not make yourself a home out here. I never did forget you, but...but apparently you have forgotten me. Why?"
It was a fair enough question if a little over dramatic, especially for Azmaria. Mimsey Sawyer shook his head like he had felt a flea bite, and snorted bitterly. Who was she to say he didn’t remember her? He just wasn’t... “I remember you.” He said with a slight click of his jaws. “But it’s been a while, Az. I never expected to see my family again. Why would you want to come looking for me?” He couldn’t understand why she had- it felt like his heart was somewhat solidified and dusty. He remembered her better the more he looked at her- but it was a face he’d never expected to see again.
“You grew up. You look different.” He dismissed again, and sat on the stone where he was. She didn’t approach, so he did not either. Something about a pained look on her face. He didn’t want to feel guilty over this. But before guilt, came something else- worry. Why was she looking for him? Had their pack been scattered? He’d never cared much for that life, but-
“Why me?” Kolina "Why would I come looking for you? Sawyer, I missed you!" Azmaria dared a step forward but by now the ever increasing pain had climaxed to a point that the she-wolf could not bare. Why her headaches had grown to the point were just being in another's prescence triggered them Az would never know. Contact with others had been forced to very few and even those discussions were kept as a distance. The last wolf she had managed to be relatively close to was the one back at the Outrider's pack on the beach. It was an ever annoying thing and Az hoped that things didn't get worse. If they did she'd be in a quite a bit of trouble.
Taking a few steps back to release the pressure Azmaria mentally sighed as the pain subsidded to a dull throb that syncronized with the beating of her heart. It was barable but oh how she wished to rush her brother, to touch him, to be close.
At the wolf's comment Azmaria nodded. "You've changed a lot too...Sawyer, why did you choose to live out here? Weren't you happy within the pack?" It seemed like an innocent enough question to Azmaria though one never knew how others would take such questions. Mimsey The brown wolf flinched as he watched his sister approach. She didn’t seem well- her body looked frail, and she seemed pained by something. Pain by seeing him? He licked his lips in a flush of agitation, and hopped onto the next rock, distancing themselves. It felt like the closer she got, the more of an itch he got behind his ears, reminding him of the guilt and worry. He didn’t want to feel guilty! He didn’t want to care. He was a lone wolf- they didn’t need anyone. He’d never needed anyone.
“I didn’t need anyone.” He snapped. “I don’t want to just be some wolf in a pack that gets old and dies there. I wanted to live on my own. Not everybody wants to have things perfect. I don’t look good, maybe-“ He scowled, and the skin across his ribs rippled. “But at least I do what I want!”
He was angry- but not really at her. The brown wolf paced, and when he looked at her again, he felt the same twinge of guilt. “Ugh!” He snapped. “You shouldn’t have come after me. Look at you, you look sick! Go home, Az! There’s nothing you want to see here.” The vagabond waited for a moment- his long nails clicking on the rocks as he paced, before turning around again and lowering his head. “Just- just go home.” He spoke lowly, and with a flick, took off into the brush. Kolina Azmaria could almost feel it happening as much as see it. Her brother was getting agitated and by the looks of it angry! What had she done? Had her question been the reason for his anger?
Azmaria visibly flinched when Sawyer yelled. Her eyes, never truly ever catching Sawyers knowing full well what that could cause, fell directly to the ground. "I am sorry, I didn't mean..." She didn't get to finish her sentence as Sawyer continued with his yelling. Tears began to well in Az's eyes. Why was Sawyer acting like this! Why was he so angry?! Was it because of her? It had to be! After all he looked rather calm before he realized who she was. All that looking she had done and the pain she had endured and this was the outcome of it all.
The last words, before the rustle of leaves and the ever diminishing pressure on her mind which told the she-wolf that Sawyer had left, were the words that hurt the most. Go home? Just go home? Sawyer made it sound so easy but Azmaria wasn't sure if she even knew the way home now. She had traveled so far from the sea. The scent was no longer on the wind. How could she possibly find her way home now?
Eyes rising to look at where Sawyer had previously been she tentavily walked toward the rock her spirit and mood completely drained. Sniffling quietly and holding back the salty wetness in her eyes Azmaria climbed up onto the rock that Sawyer had stood upon and curled into a ball, tucking her nose under her tail. There she allowered her tears to fall as she fell asleep, uncaring if anyone she come across her.
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:12 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- Curiosity Killed The...Wolf?---------------------------------------------------------------- Azmaria and Lewana
Old posts from 2007(ish)
Kimaria33: Lewana was scared of the outside world but she was also curious of it. She had been taught that curiosity was dangerous and that it could lead her into harm but at the same time she wanted a litle excitement in her life. She had realised that ever since she had met that other wolfess and she wanted it still.
That was why she stood now on the outskirts of her packlands, pink nose twitching as she stared out at the world all around her. Bird song filtered to her ears and around her she could hear the great breathing of the planet itself.
Beautiful.
Slowly Lewana took another step away from the pack, all to aware that her luck might run out and Ola would discover what she had been up to. Why she'd even been touched by an outsider the other day! That was one of the greatest sins a virgin maiden could ever do, for she was not to have contact with anyone, let alone a non-believer.
X Dramatic Ash X: Azmaria had found herself very far from the oceans shore to the point where she may never find her packlands again. Little attention had been taken when traveling and so Azmaria had little sense of where she was. She only knew that she was growing closer to wolves. How she knew Az wasn't sure, but a strange buzzing in her head told her.
The pain in her head was slowly starting to decrease but would still make it's painful prescence known when Azmaria grew -too- close to others. At least the strange buzzing in her head wasn't changing into pain and it worked as a wonderful alert system. If she wasn't feeling all that brave she could easily turn herself away from the wolves but the lonely life was beginning to torment the she-wolf and Azmaria almost found herself begging for that buzzing sensation anymore.
Eyes gazed around her as she tried to decipher where the wolf or wolfs were. It was still hard to pinpoint a location but Azmaria wasn't about the complain. A scent on the wind was enough to direct her and Az navigated her way through the forest to her destination.
Breaking through the thick undergrowth, Azmaria found herself face-to-face with the puriest of white hued she-wolves. It was such an odd thing to witness as the younger wolf appeared much like a spirit rather than an actual living being.
The strange buzzing in Azmaria's head seemed to flick a switch and Az felt a small and tolerable shock of pain. Ignoring it for thetime being, Azmaria stood where she was and bowed her head slightly unsure whether she had stumbled across packlands. Better safe than sorry.
Kimaria33: Lewana's eyes widened as she set eyes on a beautiful adult female, this one was so sleek and the most wonderful of colours that she found herself almost jealous. Ola had always told her that she had the most beautiful coat but Lewana had always wished for a bit of colour, something to make her unique.
She did indeed look like a ghost, a pink-eyed ghost with large ears that swivelled forwards. The sun was behind her and shone through the skin, dousing them with a burning light.
She remembered her encounter with the other female, but her fear died almost instantly. That courtesy, the bow, that was what she was used to. It made Lewana comfortable because that was the only social life she had ever had. She spoke only of her Goddess and nothing else and she would often find herself being bowed to. Some might have found it disturbing but it had been the way of her life ever since she was a tiny newborn curled ather mother's side.
She was special...she was special...sometimes she wished she could just be normal. Sometimes she wanted to roll in mud and pretend to be someone else.
Umm...hello? She sure did lack conversation skills. Are you...are you of Cerridwen? She thought that only Cerridwen followers would bow in such a manner.
X Dramatic Ash X: Ears pricked up at the soft tone of the ghostly females voice. Carridwen? Surely that was the name of her pack. That realization made Azmaria want to turn tail and run. The last thing that the blossoming seer wanted was to get herself into a predicament she wouldn't be able to get herself out of but something told Az that she was in no danger from this female. MAybe, maybe she'd be fine? Surely this little she-wolf of purity wouldn't turn tempers and attack.
"No...I am not." Az tentavily stepped foreward with her head low and tail tucked. Submission was what was required of a rogue to any member of a pack. That was one thing that Azmaria remembered from listening to her grandfather talking. "I've traveled from the ocean." Az looke dup into those eyes of the others and felt another familiar jab of pain before she averted her eyes back to the ground again. The dull throb in her mind an ever constant annoyance now.
Kimaria33: Lewana's eyes widened a little as she realised her mistake and dipped her head simultaneously to Azmaria. In fact that made her smile a little, they both seemed so hopeless! In fact, she decided that she quite liked this other female already.
Sorry...you just...umm...well... She trailed off awkwardly, searching for just the right words. I thought you were, that's all...everyone of Cerridwen bows their heads to me so I just assumed you were just some...lost member. As she said it she realised how ridiculous it sounded. What had she been thinking!?
Excuse me...but...what's the ocean? She had only ever known the forests and the trees and Ola had never taught her about other places in the world. There had never been any point. They had stayed here for many, many years, living under the faithful gaze of their Goddess. If they left here then they would leave behind their blessings and surely meet some ill fate.
X Dramatic Ash X: Azmaria dared not lift her head even when the other female bowed her own though surprise was clearly reflected in Az's eyes. Why would a pack member feel the need to make such a gesture to her, Azmaria, a loner and quite the unattractive one at that. Ribs were clearly showing and her fur was far from the immaculate condition it had once been when mother fawned over her. Dirt and burrs seemed attracted to the tan fur and it annoyed Azmaria quite a bit, but there wasn't much the she-wolf could do about it. No, she was forced to deal with these problems for she was now lost and far from home.
Ears pricked foreward again as the pure hued femme spoke. Everyone bowed to her? Was this femme perhaps alpha of the pack? Surely not! She was far too young to hold such a position. None-the-less Azmaria wasn't about to question it. No, she'd just let that comment pass without any movment of a response.The next question presented though was enough to jerk Az's head up slightly and look instinctively into the femme's eyes causing another painful stab which forced Az to wince. Averting her eyes once again Az turned her head slightly to the side. "The ocean is....It's well a really large lake but it has no opposite shore-line that you can see and it's not water you'd want to drink. IT's salty and doesn't taste good so it's merely there for pleasure. There are waves the come in from the water and they can bring all kinds of things to the sandy shore. There's also weird creatures that live there but they hurt it they manage to pinch you with their large claws." It was obvious by the way that Azmaria spoke that she highly enjoyed the ocean and all the wonders it brought yet a sadness tinged her voice for with the ocean brought wonderful memories of her grandfathers pack.
Kimaria33: Her obvious appearance faults ha gone unnoticed to Lewana, she had only seen the beautiful colours of her fur and not the burrs and dirt that covered it. She could also tell that this wolf was a kind soul and wished somehow that she could help. She reminded Lewana so much of the disbanded members, so kind and helpful. Where were they now? She assumed they were dead, for no one could outrun Cerridwen's wrath.
As for the confuson that she had caused Azmaria, Lewana was oblivious to it. She had only ever known this pack and it's rankings and ways were part of her. She thought nothing of other packs or that they were different, though she did realise that her pack was the only one who worshipped Cerridwen. She just assumed that every pack had a maiden wolf as well as a crone and holy mother.
Then came the description of the ocean and the white female found her heart buzzing. Water was very much part of her life and she bathed daily in the pool of Amen to keep her fur spotless. Yet this water sounded different, it sounded fun and very much a type of water that was unpure, so unpure that it coudn't even be drunk! Her ears twisted forwards with interest.
It sounds wonderful. I can barely imagine water so...so...big and...well...big! Her tail hinted at a friendly wag. Oh why did you leave such a place, umm...sorry, I never got your name...nor gave you mine. She raised her head proudly to speak again.
I am the Maiden, Lewana.
X Dramatic Ash X: The naive nature of this new female did not go unnoticed by Azmaria, but she herself was quite the naive one despite her adult size and age. Azmaria had never really gotten over her pupish ways for she had always wished to hang on to them until the last moment but life would not allow her that luxury and thrust upon her many things that were not of her understanding. It forced Azmaria to grow up quickly with no aid of pack members or of her family.
A small wag of a tail...
Azmaria looked up again making sure to keep her eyes away from this ghostly femmes. The pain was enough of a reminder to do such but the dull throb was slowly growing stronger. How much longer would the interaction last until she was forced to scurry away? How much longer would it be until she finally found the answer to the pain that haunted her being? How much longer until all of her questions were answered for her? Azmaria didn't know.
"It is a sight to see and something that can not be compared to anything else I've ever seen along my travels." Az sighed and looked up through the branches to the blue sky above. She smiled slightly before looking away with a small sigh. "I left for several reasons and one of them no one has been able to help me with." I sometimes feel as if no one will help me.
At the offer of a name, Az nodded her head though the title had no importance to her. "It's nice to meet you Lewana. I am Azmaria."
Kimaria33: Naive. Yes Lewana was very naive. She tried to be grown up, all the time. For unlike Azmaria she had tried to embrace the wisdom of adulthood when she was a pup. She wanted to grow, to be wise and to be a wonderful maiden to her pack. Maybe if she were more intelligent she could help to find a way to get her pack powerful again. Little did she know that the answer was staring at her in the face.
Outsiders, lones, non-believers.
Perhaps some of them held promise within them that would enable the pack to grow again. Yet, Lewana had not even considered this.
You were lucky to have seen it. Maybe...maybe one day I will dream of it. Though how she would dream of something she had never physically seen was beyond her.
Azmaria. She repeated the name with a smile and thought it wonderful. It sounded magical on her tongue, the name of a brilliant wolf. This female was so lucky! Beautiful fur, the ability to wander and a name of queens.
No one has been able to help you? Maybe I can help or...someone else? Is it something serious? It seemed her timid nature had faded a little. Azmaria obviously brought out something good in this usuallyshy girl.
X Dramatic Ash X: Promise. That was something that Azmaria held within her being but the she-wolf had no idea the promise she held. So much was waiting to break forth from it's confines inside the timid femme but Azmaria's reluctance to really grasp hold of adulthood was one of the largest obstacles in the power's way. Maybe one day someone would show Azmaria what was waiting to be released. One day she would find her true being and find her spot amongst the world of wolves but when would that be? Yes another question left unanswered.
"Yes, lucky..." Azmaria left it at that, not wanting to go any further with the conversation but the conversation turned to another topic she was not sure she wanted to discuss yet.
"It's difficult, this problem of mine." Azmaria sighed. "I have yet to find someone who could help me and as much as I wish and hope that you or someone from your pack could aid me, I don't want to cause anyone trouble...or get my hopes up."
So much, That was so much more than Azmaria had intended to reveal but this femme was just so kind and careing, one seemingly far older in temperment than she appeared in age. Maybe this ghostly femme, Lewana, could truly find help for her. Maybe there still was hope!
Kimaria33: She canted her head and hre ears tipped forwards at the other wolf's words. She seemed sad now, troubled perhaps? Such an emotion on so kindly a wolf was just not right! Lewana wanted to help but mentally she did not feel capable. Now Ola, perhaps... The old she-wolf was a mistress of instinct, she knew everything there was to know. Wisdom ran back far into the Crone's history, perhaps to the very first of her line. But what would Ola say if Lewana brought forth an outsider? She shuddered at the thought.
I'm sorry Azmaria...I...I would help you if I could but...but I think this problem is big, yes? She felt suddenly afraid of what it could be and her legs trembled as she flattened her ears. I wouldn't want to get your hopes up only to break them all. That would be a horrible sin!
She exhaled softly and her fur gleamed like white fire as the sun rolled overhead. But...maybe I know someone who can help you...though I probably shouldn't say anything. Her brow furrowed as she desperately tried to think of what to do. Could Ola truly be mad at her for trying to help a fellow wolf?
She lowered her voice and leaned forwards so that only Azmaria could head. She is the sage of our broken pack...known as the Crone to most. She is the wisest of all wolves and is always there to give advice in times of need. She speaks to Cerridwen herself!
X Dramatic Ash X: Azmaria recognized reluctance and fear when she saw it. She never wanted to cause such emotions in anyone let alone this pure hearted femme before her. No she wanted the female to be happy and content. Azmaria took another step foreword with the want to comfort the female but it was a step too far for Azmaria's head exploded with pain. A whimper escaped her as she stepped a few paced back until the pain ebbed back into the annoying throb.
"Don't worry about me, really...if you feel that there is no way of helping me then please don't worry yourself..."
But the young Lewana had more to say and the words that left the female's maw caused a small hope to rise up in Azmaria's chest. HAd she truly found someone who could help her? Was this where she was to end up? Surely a wolf with as much knowledge as Lewana claimed her to have could help! But...what was this she mentioned...?
"That...that sounds wonderful Lewana and I would truly love to meet his sage of yours. Any help I can recieve would be greatly appreciated but...but who is this Cerridwen that you speak of? I had thought that Carridwen was just the name of your pack."
Kimaria33: As Azmaria stepped forwards Lewana felt a sudden fear clench her. She couldn't be touched by an outsider, not again! Oh the bathing it took to purge her of such a sin! But she needn't have worried because Azmaria pulled back, obviously in some sort of pain.
Seeing such pain in Azmaria's face hurt Lewana too. She hated seeing others suffer and sometimes, especially with wolves she was fond of, she felt it too. She was very sensitive when it came to pain, though she had been lucky enough not to experience it herself. She was much too sheltered for that!
Azmaria! Azmaria are you okay? She stepped forwards very slightly, momentarily forgetting her fears of closeness. She whined and her ears pinned back against her skull. Oh she felt so hopeless!
However, the pain seemed to pass and with it Azmaria spoke again. Just hearing her voice again made her feel more relaxed.
Very well, I'll take her to you...but on one condition. She paused and her pink eyes held the colours of a plea. You must leave for now and return in three nights time, when the moon is up. She does her best work in the moonlight. She cleared her throat, realising she was revealing a little too much of their ways.
We are a secretive and nervous kind so I will need that time to convince Ola to see you. She may be untrusting at first but truly she is a kindly soul. In some sense that was true. Ola was helpful and kind to the pack members, yet if you got on her back about something or caught her at the wrong moment she would throw a fit. She could be cold hearted one minute and perfectly lovely the next. Lewana would often find herself trembling in fear when Ola grew angry.
Cerridwen...you do not know of her? Lewana was whispering again. She is the holy one, the one that lives in all three of us. She is our Goddess, the moon and the trinity. She protects us and loves us as her children and has protected us for many years.
xdramaticashx: The younger she-wolf's fear of being touched went unnoticed by Azmaria. The older femme had been too preoccupied by her own pain to notice Lewana's obvious fear but contact had never come as much as Azmaria longed for it. No instead, Azmaria was forced to retreat. Az was near ready to back up again which would bring her rear end up against the bush in which she had first appeared from but Lewana stopped her approach. It seemed both females dared not grow to close to one another, each one fearing a retribution of some sort.
Finally, she would get some answers! Finally there would...no...no...she couldn't get her hopes up so quickly. There was a chance that this female that Lewana spoke of, Ola, may not know what Az's problem was. After all, there had not been one wolf who knew, but oh how that little shred of hope ate up Azmaria. It longed to envelope her being as much as the tan-hued female wouldn't allow it.
"Three nights.." Azmaria muttered to herself as a way of reassuring herself that that was the time she had. Three nights...
There it was again...A goddess? Azmaria had heard of wolves who worshipped higher beings but never had she encountered them. She had begun to think that such wolves were mere stories but here stood one before her, praising the Goddess that Lewana's pack worshipped. "If your Ola and Goddess can help me then I will praise Cerridwen alongside you and the rest of your pack." That was a promise that Azmaria knew she could keep.
Kimaria33: Lewana found herself being extremely reasured at Azmaria's words. She would so willingly worship Cerridwen? Maybe if she would then there were other wolves out there, wolves who were looking for a purpose. Lewana could think of no better lifethan serving her Goddess, though she wished she didn't have to serve as the Maiden.
This time she stepped back and there was a kindly look in her pink eyes. I cannot promise you that Ola will know the full answer, but maybe, just maybe, with Cerridwen's help they can point you in the right direction.
Her tail wagged and this time she did look truly relaxed in this female's presence. I just hope your pain can ease. Then she looked embarrased again. May I call you...a friend...Azmaria?
xdramaticashx: "Any help that can be offered to me is greatly appreciated Lewana. I thank you for even taking your time to offer me aid. It's a rough and lonely life living alone and I've come to realize that wolves look out for mainly themselves when one is alone. It's a sad fact but true so it's a wonderful change to meet someone as kind-hearted as you." In truth, Lewana reminded Azmaria of her mother in some sense. The little white she-wolf held a strong and nurturing heart just like Tatiana.
Azmaria smiled, a true smile that echoed in her eyes as she looked upon Lewana. "Yes, you can surely call me friend as long as I may call you friend as well?" Azmaria knew the answer to that question already though. This young femme and Az were much like kindred spirits. Maybe the two were destined to reach one another. Maybe this Goddess that Lewana spoke so highly of was the one to lead the two of them together. Whatever or whoever it was, Az could only thank them to the high heavens and back again. Not only had she found help but she found a new friend, something that could never be replaced.
Kimaria33: Any normal wolf may have bounded forwards, perhaps touched noses to confirm the friendship but Lewana could not. There was a strange twitch of sadness in her heart as she realised she could never be with anyone. It had been easier to live with lately, but if the alphas soon came to the lands she would be forced to atch them from afar. The nuzzling, the play-fighting and the simple enjoyment of sharing space with one another. She would never have that, ever.
All she could do now was wag her tail and use her eyes to show how much this new friendship meant to her. Luckily it seemed Azmaria was not intent on getting close either, maybe that was why she felt so comfortable. With this wolfess there was no constant worry.
O-of course. She stuttered only through sheer joy and her tail wagged harder. Well Azmaria, maybe you can find a place to call home here, I'm certain I can convince Ola of it. She looked thoughtful for a moment. The pack is nearing a new era so maybe this was a good omen, our meeting I mean...I just-- Sshe was cut off by a howl, that sounded not too far away.
The white wolf bristled and hung her head shamefully.
Oh no, Ola knows I'm missing. She craned back her head and peered into the trees. I'm sorry Azmaria but...I...I must go...remember...three days time! We'll meet right here, okay?
xdramaticashx: Azmaria chuckled softly at Lewana's obviously happy attitude. Knowing that Lewana was happy was enough for Azmaria to be pleased about. Afterall, Az was always the wolf who liked to put smiles on other's faces, even a the cost of her own happiness. This time though Azmaria was getting her own rewards which only made the wolfess more happy to be around Lewana. Yes, they certainly were kindred spirits.
With her tail wagging Azmaria nodded her head. "I think I would like to live here. As strange as your ways may be I'd be willing to conform and learn about this Goddess of yours. I just hope that Cerridwen and Ola will be of some help." The name of the Goddess was a strange thing to Azmaria. To think a spirit, no, goddess, was worshipped within this pride. It was a strange thing to think about but something that didn't unnerve the she-wolf, no, just intrigued her. "Our meeting was certainly a good omen. We bacme friends after all." Az chuckled as the wagging of her tail never slowed until the howl of a strange wolf froze Azmaria.
At first, Az had thought that the pack members had caught her scent and were looking for her. That was not a thought that eased the femme's mind but Lewana's posture and attitude spoke otherwise. "No, don't worry about it. Hurry back. I'll meet you here in three days time. I promise." With that said Az wagged her tail once more before turning and bounding through the bush she had first appeared from. The last thing she wanted was to get Lewana in trouble so the further she could get away the better for the time being.
Three days time and they'd see one another again.
Three days...
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:14 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- Diagnosis?---------------------------------------------------------------- Azmaria, Lewana and Ola
Old posts from 2007(ish)Kimaria Lewana had not been given much time to talk with Ola, not since the new alphas had arrived and begun to learn all they needed to learn. The old Cronehad put everything else out of her mind so that she could focus upon Yasuo and Orphen's lessons.So much so that Lewana only had now to tell her. She had mentioned it briefly here and there but either Ola ha dnot bene listening or she just didn't care. Either way, the teen was frustrated that she was not being taken seriously.
That was why she approached Ola's den just as the moon begun its steady climb into the sky.
Ola? She called, her voice soft and quivering in the dark. The sky was clear but icy cold and it seemed the warm patch of spring had given away to cold again. Oh how she hated it!
However, it was not to cold that she could keep herself from shivering and as she moved towards the entrance she tentatively peeked her head inside the den and snuffled. Ola? Ola are you there? Her tail inched to tuck between her legs as she got no reply and slowly she backed out, peering up at the wolf skull guarding the entrance.
Oh, Darya, where is she? Again Lewana turned and gazed all around. The floor here was littered with the bones of voles, mice and birds, a favourite of Ola's. She seemed to love living in her own little graveyard, though it was no surprise. She represented death and a new beginning, she must have felt comfortable with it.
Lewana, however, was not. Death was not her symbol and it never would be, not even when she had grown out of the age of a Maiden and retired.
Perhaps it was by luck, but a few strides back into the trees brought with it the sound of voices, whispering somewhere close by. At first she could not distinguish anything, but then she heard them and realised one belonged to Ola. The other...well Lewana had a feeling it belonged to Orphen, the new alpha female.
She approached quietly, with hre head slung low and her tail unmoving behind her. Moonlight danced along her white fur and in this pale hue she did indeed look like a ghost.
Ola? Ola, it's me.
The voices stopped and she halted, hackles bristling as she wondered whether she had just made a horrible mistake.
Umm...Ola? She felt she needed to talk and was relieved when she finally got a reply.What are you doing out here, child? The old crone grumbled as she approached, appearing from the shadows as if by magic. Behind her the form of Orphen appeared, her eyes watching the two with anticipation.
Can't you see I am busy? The elder trailed off into a long string of grumbles that not even sharp-eyed Lewana could make out. Well out with it girl, what do you want?Lewana dipped her ears sheepishly and glanced once more at Orphen before continuing. She needed to say this in the most simple way possible and without making it look as if she had sinned.
It was going to be tough but definately not impossible.
She swallowed and raised her white head, pink eyes staring between the Crone's ears. It felt right not to make eye contact whilst saying such things as she was.
Ola...three nights ago I met a wolfess, a lone outsider. She--You what!? I knew it! I knew you were up to something, always sneaking around. I told Kalani to keep an eye on you, but did he? I shall have to have words with my nephew. In all honesty she didn't care whether he had or not, she was mainly pleased that she had been right.
Withthe birth of our pack beginning I cannot have you going and getting yourself dirtied by outsiders. She is an outsider, Ola. Lewana replied, pointing her nose towards Orphen. There was nothing accusing in her voice but it was a matter of fact.She is a chosen one. The crone bristled and bore her teeth, turning to Orphen and giving the alpha a silent look. With that one glance the alpha turned and headed off, back to her mate at their den. Then when they were alone, Ola nodded and together the two walked towards the spot where Azmaria had met Lewana.
Not every outsider that comes clsoe to us is a chosen one, Lewana. Do you not remember those who slaughtered the Priestesses of legend? Or who stole away our pack members? This one could be a deciever.Lewana shook her head. Please Ola, I don't know how, but I know, I know this female means us no harm. She has pains, Ola, terrible pains and she wants to find out a reason for her problem. I said you were wise, that you might be able to help her. Can you?The Crone snorted though it was clear she liked to be thought of as wise. That depends on the problem dear. I am an advisor and wise, yes, but I am not a miracle worker. I am not a shaman nor a seer, I am my own unique kind, just as all three of the Trinity are.
She huffed. Tell me more and I will decide whether this outsider is worthy of being diagnosed.Her name is Azmaria, she is a wolf from the sea and beautiful at that. She says she has a problem, a prolem no one has been able to help her with. I think it causes her pain.
She turned her pink eyes up to the Crone walking beside her. Please Ola, I think she is one of them. One of the Chosen. There is something about her. She is not like them, like the others.I will be the judge of that. But Ola was ready to agree with Lewana. She knew that more chosen wolves would be coming, not just alphas, but betas too and Priests and Priestesses. Cerridwen had already chosen them, stamped them as her own and now it was just a waiting game to see when they arrived.
As was right, the alphas had come first, but soon the Crone knew others would come. They would need warriors to flesh out their ranks, it was they who would fight it out to become the betas. Then there would be the holy wolves, the priests and priestesses.
The pack would be great again, just as their Goddess had always promised.
The pair, young and old, walked in silence, Ola following a pace behind Lewana as she led them through the dark. Soon they reached the borders and the Crone could smell an old scent on the breeze, perhaps a scent belonging to this Azmaria?
She would soon find out no doubt.It was here, just here. If we wait, she'll come. Lewana stood poised in the darkness, clearly visible under the moon's touch.
She just hoped that Azmaria would come and that she wasn't put to shame. Kolina The meeting with Lewana had done wonders to raise Azmaria's spirit and it wasn't just from the prospect of help. No, it was so much more than that. Azmaria had finally made a friend on her own. Of course Azmaria had met others amongst her travels but none who stood out like Lewana. Lewana had been a wolf that knew nothing of Az's pack and had never spoken to another that was related to the tan she-wolf. Yes, Azmaria had made a friend with her own efforts and was thrilled that her first real friend was Lewana. The white she-wolf was young, true, but so much like Azmaria that the two could almost be sisters. It was such a comforting thought.
With her spirit lifted and the prospect of help and seeing the young pale femme again, Azmaria made certain to keep her travels close to the packlands that Lewana inhabited. Hunting was done not far from the packlands but Azmaria made sure to keep enough distance so she wouldn't create any unhappy feelings should she start killing the pack's food sources. She wanted to stay on this Cerridwen packs good side.
Three days had come and gone at a relatively slow pace for Az's taste but the night that the full moon began to show it's face over the horizon, Azmaria set off to the meeting place. The she-wolf navigated her way through the foliage with ease and knew as she neared the area that someone was waiting for her. The little buzzing in her head informed her of the wolves ahead and Azmaria knew that Lewana was there. This little fact increased Az's pace and the tan femme emerged from the same bush she had the first time.
The sight that greeted Azmaria was a surprising yet very welcomed one. There stood Lewana in all her white glory with the moonlight's rays illuminating that perfect white coat of hers and beside Lewana stood a femme of opposite hue. It was obvious that this female had once been stark black and would have melded into the darkness of night with ease but age had taken affect and flecked the females muzzle and body rruining the perfect look of shadows. This female, Azmaria could only assume, was Ola.
Like she had done before upon first meetin Lewana, Azmaria dropped her head in a bow. The last thing the femme wanted was to cause any ill feelings. Lewana had seemed pleased yet surprised at the gesture when they had first met so Az hoped it would work again. "I hope I didn't keep you waiting long." She lifted her head but made sure to keep it lower than Ola's as she smiled at Lewana but made no motion to step foreward. The dull throb of her head was bareable at the distance she kept from the two. Kimaria Lewana's heart sailed as Azmaria appeared. Was this what it felt like to have a friend? She would have done anything for a friend and now she had one. It was a strange prospect and one that she should never have. Getting clsoe to wolves was only going to hurt her in the long run, for she knew her position held a wall between her and others. Yet somehow she could not help but think this Azmaria was different. It was a vibe she got from the female, she supposed.
As Azmaria bowed Lewana turned to Ola with a wide, doggy grin, her ears turning to face the elder. See Ola, I told you she--Hush. The elder wolf spoke, her voice harsh. Lewana fell silent instantly and the smirk was wiped clean from her face. Ola paid no heed to the white femme now. Her pale grey eyes - that gleamed like silver in the darkness - were upon this new wolf now.
Here the trees were thin and allowed sprays of moonlight to filter down upon them. It played upon Azmaria's fur now, gently stroking each colour so that she seemed almost to shine with moonbeams.
To any wolf, the moonlight on fur was something not especially important but to Ola, it told her everything she needed to know. The angle and the strength, the way it moved, every little part of the light told her about the wolves she set eyes on. It was this that would determine whether Azmaria was worthy of being allowed near them.
She was silent a good while and then finally she raised her head and glanced upwards. The moon arched like a bow of a hunter yet it was kindly still and Ola knew it would tell no lie.
The moon tells me many things, wolf-child. The crone whispered, her nose pointed to the sky. Many, many things. But most of all, it reveals to me the spirit of a wolf, it's heart and soul. She lowered her head slowly and her eyes seemed almost like moons themselves.
I have lived far longer than most wolves and I am destined to live many, many more years, yet never in all my time have I seen the moon shine so brightly upon one as yourself, an outsider. What it meant, Ola was not too sure but she knew it was to be a good omen. She gleamed almost as much as Lewana - which was saying something.
Has Lewana told you much of our pack and of our ways, child? Kolina Azmaria smiled at Lewana when the young femme was cut off by her elder. With a tilt of her head she almost attempted to reassure Lewana with a soft wag of her tail before Azmaria's attention was dragged from her friend to Ola.
The white flecked femme was quite an intriguing sight to Azmaria as the older wolfess raised her head to look up to the rising full moon. Azmaria knew little of what the Crone was looking for until Ola's old voice broke the silence that had hung like a veil over the trio.
Azmaria, unknowingly hung upon each word that Ola spoke. So mcuh information could be told from the moon? It made sense why Lewana insisted that Azmaria come on the night of the full moon then. With all the light the large orb in the sky possessed on it's full days this Ola would be able to help to her greatest potential...if she so chose to help that was.
As much as Azmaria wished to meet those entrancing eyes of the Crones, she dared not. Peering into the eyes of others seemed to bring as much pain as close proximity and Azmaria did not want to appear unsatisfied or upset with Ola by flinching away. No, for now she would play it safe and not gaze into those silver orbs.
The moon shone brightly...upon her...Azmaria? Surely this was a good sign by the way in which the older femme was reacting. Plus, the fact that Azmaria wasn't being chased away boded well.
"No, Lewana has told me little. I only know of your wisdom, the importance of the moon, and of the Goddess, Cerridwen." Kimaria Then you have much to learn, child, but I have the feeling that you will want to learn it and learn it well. Our ways are strange to outsiders but they are ways that have been practised since the very beginning of time. She dipped her snout, aware that something was troubling the young one. She could not quite place her paw on it, but something...something else dwelled within this wolf.
Something that was both magic and instinct.
We have a social structure that is quite different from other packs. For though we are led by the alphas, known as Ira to us, the Trinity also lead, in cases of the spiritual world. If you like, we are two packs within one, each of us joined by our faith alone. You say you know of Cerridwen, well I am sure you do not know all. She speaks to me sometimes and she speaks to me now.
She paused and stepped forwards very slightly. The moon shows me who you truly are, whether you are an enemy or a chosen. Azmaria...you are a chosen, you are one of the Thanu.The Thanu!? Then I was right! Azmaria truly is one of us! Lewana stepped forwards too, coming to stand directly next to the crone.
Please Ola, I know I am young, but can I teach her if she wishes? You have your work cut out with the alphas and...well...I'd like to be useful for a change.Ola sent a glare towards Lewana but the look softened into an agreeable look. For a moment it seemed like she might stay quiet and then she spoke again.
You may guide her Lewana for she is holy, though she will need to be purified first in the sacred pool of Amen. But let us not rush. She has not agreed to any of this yet. She turned her moon eyes back to the outsider. What say you Azmaria? I know you came here to find a soloution to your problem, but maybe this is part of that soloution? I cannot force you to stay and I cannot speak for the alphas, but I will tell you now, I will try to help a fellow moon-sister whether you stay or not.
Walk with us or out alone, you are still very much of Cerridwen. Kolina Traditions....
Traditions and religion was what made this pack and apparently such strong traits helped the pack survive since it's forefathers joined together so many years ago. The strong beliefs of the packs members was what held everything together. Without those dedicated to the packs cause and Goddess then it would never have survived. It was an amazing feat and it forced Azmaria to really think that this Goddess did truly exist. Afterall, how else could this pack survive so long without Cerridwen guiding and guarding them.
As the femme stepped foreward Az fought back the urge to step back as the dull throb in her head increased ever so slightly. With each step closer Ola and Lewana made, Az was forced into more pain. Thankfully neither had made the plunge to really advanced upon Azmaria, otherwise she'd either be forced to flee or drop to the ground to keep herself from falling over with pain. Instead, Az just looked upon the two wolves a little confused with all the information being thrust at her at once. One thing did stand out among the words being said and Az knew how she felt towards said words.
"I don't truly know what you mean by Thanu but I do know that if I may find aid here and I belong, then I shall stay. You have been the only ones willing to really help me with my problems and if Cerridwen has truly led me here then I shall stay. Learning the ways of your pack I am sure will take time but it's something I am willing to try. It's...it's nice to have a place I belong. Besides, I already promised Lewana I would stay if there was any hope of there being help here for me." Azmaria smiled softly as she raised her head to it's normal height, now finally feeling calm around these wolves, members of her pack, her new family. Kimaria Ola nodded. She had obviously been impressed with the female's words. Truly she was soft-hearted, though she was often forced to cover that up. This Azmaria had the makings of a great Thanu someday and that was a promising and wonderful thought. The pack had been without a good Priestess for a long time and Lewana needed something to keep her mind focused on her duty, this would be good for both of the young wolves.
You have much to learn child, much to learn. The meaning of Thanu should become clear in time, but it is a rank to be proud of, for it is rare that one holds such an aura.
Her brow wrinkled slightly. There is a lot to teach you but in time you will begin to understand everything, though it may not make sense at first. She turned briefly to Lewana who was wagging her tail furiously and then returned to her thoughts.
Now, your problem, perhaps this can be linked with your aura? Please, whilst we walk, tell me about it. She gestured with her nose, back down the path her and Lewana had come. Kolina "I am willing and ready to begin learning." Azmaria spoke as she smiled softly at Ola. This tough and hardened femme was someone that Azmaria could see herself looking up to eventually. The dark Crone just radiated wisdom and knowledge with the way she carried herself plus her greying fur helped emphasis this sensation. Yes, Azmaria felt she had found yet another friend whom she'd be able to depend on in her coming days within her new pack.
Her new pack...
And now off to her new packlands with Ola and Lewana leading the way. The path they were taking was obviously worn and used often. Unfamiliar scents wafted strongly around the pathway as the trio gre further and further into the pack's territory. Azmaria made certain to hang back as far as she could without seeming rude but as close as her headaches would allow her. It was a great juggling act really. To find a happy medium was a rare feat but something that Az was beginning to get the grasp of.
Ears lowered slightly as Azmaria tryed to formulate an answer for Ola but there was only one way to put it, "I have headaches." She stated bluntly before continuing to emphasis her problem. "It's not just regular pains either. They only seem to come when I get to close to other wolves and the closer I get the stronger the pain is. Right now the pain is just bearable enough for me to walk so closely to you." And closely was most certainly a few feet behind Ola and Lewana. "The pain is worse if I happen to make eye contact. It all began happening not long after I left my packlands and since then has grown increasingly worse. At first it was only a few select wolves that pained me to be around but that quickly changed to all of them." Azmaria's head hung down a little lower as she thought about the trouble she dealt with. "I couldn't even get too close to my own brother. That was when I realized how bad things had gotten. One thing strange has occured though. I have been able to tell when I grow close to others. I could hear a strange...I guess could call it a buzzing sound that would appear just before I got into a range too close when my head would ache."
Azmaria sighed and closed her eyes for a brief moment. "It's frusturating not knowing the cause. I truly just want to live as normal as a life I can but this...this problem just won't go away. Though I must admit it has gotten slightly better but by a very small margin." Kimaria As Azmaia began to speak of her problem, Lewana bounced sideways, further away from the femme. She hadn't meant to hurt her. Oh poor Azmaria! She turned her head back to glance at the wolf and whined, her white ears pinning back.
Oh no! Azmaria I'm so sorry... Her pink eyes looked up sympathetically. There was no way she could have begun to understand what was going on in her new friend's head.
Is it because of your...pack Goddess? She turned her eyes questioningly to Ola. Maybe your Goddess is mad you left?Nonsense. Ola snapped, Lewana, keep to speaking on things you understand. Please. She paid the little one no heed as she shrunk back and instead continued to give a response to Azmaria. She could not be positive of what was going on but she had a few sneaking suspicions.
There was one more favourable idea.
There are many interesting things you note, though you may not realise their significance. However, it seems the source of these headaches come with close contact. That rules out any medical problem you may have. Ola paused. I think your mind is trying to tell you something Azmaria, something that you are unknowingly frightened of. Ola was trying to piece things together as she spoke, but all she could think of was the legend. It kept coming back to her. You try to keep pushing the pain aside, you cower away from it, but I think, if you embraced it you will find that it is not so painful after all. Perhaps it was just the mentality of this wolf.
But there is another thing... She trailed off there, unsure whether she should speak of it or not. Kolina Azmaria couldn't help but smile at Lewana. The white she-wolf was still very much a pup as she was a young adult and it pleased Azmaria. It was best for Lewana to keep hold of that pup-hood as long as she could but still be aware to the threats of the real world. That had been Azmaria's own mistake. Grasping to her pup-hood had been marvelous but had put Azmaria into a state of unknowing when she was forced out into the world on her own. "It's alright, Lewana. I've learned to cope. The pain isn't all the terrible at the moment as long as I am careful of my distance."
A goddess from her own pack? No, that certainly wasn't the case. She had never heard of her parents worshipping a Goddess of any sort. Azmaria didn't get teh chance to inform Lewana of this before the Crone snapped at the pale-hued wolfess. At that moment Azmaria's attention was dragged from Lewana to Ola.
"Embrace it?" That prospect -did- frighten Azmaria. She truly did not want to feel that horid mind-numbing pain again. It was enough to force the femme to the ground whimpering why would she wish to embrace it? But...maybe what Ola said was true? Maybe all she truly had to do was grin and bar eit and hope things would snap into place...
"Another thing?" Azmaria pulled herself from her thoughts to look at Ola. What else could there be? Azmaria almost wanted demand that Ola told her now but something was certainly keeping the Crone from speaking. "Please. I'ss take to heart anything and everything you can suggest." Kimaria Ola nodded, and cleared her throat in a way that made it clear she was about to say something important. The very posture of her body as she walked showed that what she was going to say was something secret. However, if she could trust anyone then it would have been a thanu, for they were holy wolves too, Priestesses of Cerridwen.
There are many legends of our Goddess, some of them are stories told to entertain pups but where do stories come from, Azmaria? Even fairy tales are based on truths. Do you not agree? She did not wait for an answer. There is one tale in particular that centers around Cerridwen herself. For before she died and rose to the heavens she gave birth to eight beautiful children. Her eyes shone and it was as if she had seen them herself.
Each of them were like their mother, perfect and wonderful. Strange, almost magical, things would happen around them and some even said they possessed magical powers. These powers took a long time to master and the path to gaining control was a painful one. She paused now and glanced at Azmaria.
This power brought headaches and terrible pain to Cerridwen's children, but at one point they managed to break free of the pain. When this happened they became something more than just wolves, they became seers, have you heard of a seer, child? Kolina Azmaria kept pace behind Ola her eyes never leaving the other female as she wated with bated breath. Ola's mannerism clearly showed, even to those who knew little about her, that something that held great importance was about to be told. So, moving as close as she dared to the femme Azmaria listened carefully and the she-wolf was not dissapointed.
Now, Azmaria was not a female to put a whole lot of trust on bed-time stories but it was the last bit that caught her attention the most. These pups of Cerridwen's had gone through the same thing she herself was struggling with. That knowledge in itself helped lift a great weight off of Azmaria's chest and so the female willed the thought that this story was based off of more than just myths and held more thruth than most stories she's heard before.
"I have heard of seers. There's not many and I don't think I know of any personally, but grandfather spoke of them once or twice. I don't know much about them so I had never really though that this pain could be from...from something like that. But surely I am not a...but how could I be? I mean my parents weren't seers and no one in my pack was so how could -I- be a seer?" Azmaria was full of doubt that she could hold these magical powers within her, but what the one little story had said, all evidence pointed to the fact that she, Azmaria was one of these wolves of legend.
"If I really am I seer how can I learn to use these magical powers? Are you saying that I have to endure whatever pain I may have to try and break free of it? Surely there is more to it than that?" Questions again. More and more were pouring out of Azmaria while more formed in the she-wolfs head. There was so much she wanted to know! Kimaria Seers are rare and a good thing too for they possess strange and unearthly powers. She smiled then. You're right though. Cerridwen's children were born seers because she was a Goddess, of sorts. They were passed her genes of ethereal quality. Yet you possess it and you say none of your family have shown this quality.
She turned to cast a look towards Lewana, the white wolf was trotting silently beside them, her head held parrellel to her shoulders.
think that because you are one of Cerridwen's chosen ones, you were blessed this power That is what I believe, though it might just be the thoughts of a religious old fool. She snorted then.
Sadly, I have no first paw experience of using these powers. All I know is that it takes practise as does everything. Try not to shy away from it anymore. Who knows, maybe your bathe in the pool of Amen will cure you of your headaches. Then as if remembering something else she raised hre tail a little higher.
I will take you first to the alphas and tell them who you are. I am sure they will let you stay. After that you are free to go with Lewana to bathe. Perhaps after you have rested your lessons can begin. She turned to face Azmaria again and her eyes were startlingly serious. Remember Azmaria, we may be religious here but we are also wolves. We are different but we are the same too. You will be welcomed here as if you were a sister.
Then she lowered her voice and as they exited the Lunah Forest they suddenly found themselves at the main densite. The dens looked out across a vast stretch of grass that eventually verged a lake so beautiful and large it was like the sea...but not. For the lake had it's edges and unlike the sea, you could see them. The forest gleamed as a silhoette on the other side. Yet the expanse was breath taking.
This is the main den site. You may walk here on occasion, but this is not where you will rest. There are private dens for the holy wolves alone. Kolina Azmaria nodded. She'd have to work hard in more ways than one to get over her pains and to learn the ways of this pack. She'd work hard, that was without doubt. Azmaria liked learning things even if she did shy away from the unknown. It was an odd combination, true, but none-the-less Azmaria managed to survive as such so it couldn't be all that abstract.
"I hope that the Goddess will aid me throguh my struggles then if she was the one to bestow this upon me." Azmaria smiled good naturedly. She had no qualms against this Goddess but if this Cerridwen was the one to give her this magic then the least that she could do was help with them, right? "Help or not I'll try not to shy from it. Maybe all it really does take, as you said, is my will to face and embrace it."
Azmaria trailed behind the two pushing her boundaries a little more and only wincing at the first stab of pain, otherwise she pushed onward. The sight that welcomed Az as the trio emerged from the forest was a beautiful one at that. For a pack so secluded they apparently had ideal territory. The lake that was situated in view glistened under the moon's light and caught Asmaria's breath. As much as it wasn't the sea it had a resembalence and that pleased the wolfess greatly. The grasslands that surrounded the lake was just as majestic in the moonlight as little bugs flitted through the tall grasses blinking every now and then.
Looking over to Ola Az nodded. "Are our dens far from here?" Azmaria questioned, tail wagging gently behind her as excitment built up within her. Kimaria It was Lewana's turn to talk, or so it seemed, for the little girl turned her head to gaze at Azmaria. The Goddess loves all wolves, Azmaria, she only hates the ones who hurt others. Sinners. If you are in the boundaries of these packlands or not she will ever protect you. It is if you reject her love that you will lose her protection. She watches over you even now. See? She pointed her nose to the moon and smiled lovingly.
Our dens aren't far. They're back in the trees, hidden from view and clsoer to Amen. We can go where we please but we can't share our dens with the warrior wolves. But you don't have to worry about why that is just yet. I'll teach you all about it later. She bounced and her tail wagged furiously.Ola growled then to silence the little wolf. It wasn't meant in a ferocious way, more like a gentle scolding. Quiet now, little Maiden. Stay here whilst Azmara and I approach the Ira den.Lewana looked dissapointed but she nodded and ceased to walk, watching silently as they continued on without her. She had only met the alpha couple once since their arrival and they seemed nice enough.
Yes, with Azmaria and the alphas here, everything was steadily falling into place. Kolina Azmaria smiled. These wolves had such a faith in their Goddess. That was something that would take some getting use to but something that Az was willing to try herself at some point. Maybe not yet, not fully, but one day. Maybe once she conquered her problem? Who knows, Az certainly didn't, but living with Lewana would even have the tan-hued femme gazing at the moon in a loving way aw well some day.
Away from the warriors? Yes, there was a lot to learn, but in time for Ola apparently had other plans for the moment. Now it was time for Azmaria to meet the Alpha's and she somewhat wondered if they would deny her enterance into the pack. Would they do such a thing? Surely not if they wanted to increase their packs size, but one could never tell with Alpha's. Each one was different and each one had their own agenda in mind to keep. So following behind Ola, Azmaria dropped her head low again and her tail dangled behind her unmovingly. Submission was the thing that Azmaria had learned that would keep a wolf alive and so, Azmaria resorted to such means once again. It had not failed her yet.
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:15 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- Welcome to the Family---------------------------------------------------------------- Azmaria, Orphen and Ola
Old posts from 2007(ish)Kimaria Orphen looked up as the two wolves approached. She had been lying at the entrance to the den with her eyes closed. At first it looked like she had slept, but truly she was just deep in thought. Could she be an alpha? Did she have the qualities of one? She wasn't sure, yet all she knew was that she wanted to try! For her sake and for Yasuo's sake.
He was out somewhere exploring but Orphen just wanted to rest a while. Ola had been teaching her many things and though she was beginning to understand the ways of this place she also had a lot of questions left to ask.
As the two grew closer still, Orphen got to her paws, stretched and padded over to greet them. She tried her best to hold her head high and wave her tail up as she walked. She needed to look in control!Greetings, Orphen. Ola replied as the old wolfess drew closer. She paused, dipped her head and then turned her eyes towards Azmaria. This is Azmaria, a thanu. Azmaria, this is the alpha female, Orphen. She paused then before continuing.
I brought her myself to see you and Yasuo. Kolina Azmaria followed as close to Ola as she could manage for the moment. As much as she wished to test her boundaries with these pain she didn't want to have so much difficulty that she couldn't pay attention to what was going around her, at least at the moment. Meeting the Alpha's of the pack was an important thing and Azmaria didn't want to look incompetent.
Upon first laying eyes upon the Ira, Azmaria took note of the small scars that traced the femme's muzzle clearly stating that the female had not had much of an easy life before coming here, that or she has fought long and hard to get to the position she was at. Afterall, Azmaria didn't know a whole great deal about the pack yet. For all she knew, these Alpha's had been in reign for quite some time. The golden eyes of the alpha had a warm look to them and helped to calm Azmaria a bit, but nothing would make her raise her head or move her limp tail until she was sure that the alpha was pleased with Azmaria joining the pack.
With introductions being made Azmaria chanced a glance up but made certain not to lock eyes with the alpha for more reasons than one. A passing glance of those golden eyes was all that Azmaria could handle at the moment. Kimaria Yasuo isn't here...he's... The wolfess trailed off as she turned her head towards the lake. Was he there? She wasn't sure, but she still hadn't told her mate how she truly felt about him. There had been no time, no time at all, because when they weren't learning they were hunting or sleeping. She had been too tired to tell him he loved her.
She sighed and cast her eyes again to Azmaria. Good, it seemed she was convinced that she was an alpha. She smiled a little and raised her head higher still. Maybe she could do this.
A thanu? That's a...Priestess, right? She turned her eyes towards Ola. Surely you are in control of the holy wolves, Ola? She blinked. If you say she is holy then how can I say otherwise? If you want my permission for her to stay then you have it. She knew her place as alpha, keeping the warriors - the bulk of the pack - in order, but she was still unclear when it came to their religion and ceremonies, though she was keen to learn.
We need more holy wolves, right? Then Azmaria will be a welcome addition.Then you agree she can stay, wonderful. Azmaria will be taught by Lewana as I am still teaching you. I can't be in two places at once. She bowed her head slightly, though it was clear that the wolves were similar in rank. The Crone was part of the Goddess, she was in charge of the ceremonies. It were as if she were alpha of the holy and Orphen was alpha of the Warriors. In a way that was true.
She shook herself then, Azmaria, you may have been from a place where the males ruled, even over their female mate. Yet here everyone is equal. Orphen has and governs as much authority as her mate, Yasuo. She nodded. So if there is a problem that Orphen can deal with, don't hesitate to ask her. Kolina Azmaria's eyes watched the alpha carefully as Orphen looked at Azmaria. Az was unsure what the female would think. Would this Orphen allow Azmaria into the pack? Azmaria hoped strongly. Surely there was no reason she wouldn't be accepted...
Azmaria's worries turned out to be just that...worries.
Finally, Azmaria had a place to call home and hopefully things would turn out for the better now that she had a place to reside in. Being in a pack was much more appealing to the wolfess than trapsing around the land of loners.
Eyes shifted from Orphen to Ola as the Crone spoke. This little bit of information wasn't that odd. Azmaria knew her mother had equal say over things with father so this concept wasn't all that new to her. "Of course." She said as she turned her focuse back to Orphen, Head still lower than the alpha's but held at a more comfortable height. Kimaria Orphen canted her head slightly and peered down her snout at Azmaria. The female seemed to have few words to say, perhaps she was just shy? She certainly was a pretty female and Orphen admired her pelt and her eyes that shone in her young face.
Don't be afraid to ask me anything. I may be alpha but I also have two kindly ears in which to listen with. There, that sounded mature. She raised her head proudly amd arched her tail upwards. The scars on her muzzle, gifted to her by her dear mother, had never healed and they were a constant reminder of her family.
She wondered on little Gizmo and hoped he was okay.
I suppose this makes you one of the family now, doesn't it?
Ola nodded and dipped her snout, moving back to stand beside Azmaria, though she kept her distance. Yes, Azmaria is family for as long as she wants us. Ola turned to gaze at the new Priestess and nodded as if she were pleased with what she saw.
We are lucky to be blessed with such a talented Priestess. Then, not wanting to give too much away to Orphen about the supposed seer abilities, Ola turned her head back to the dens in the forest.
Now, Azmaria, if there is nothing left to say, I will show you to the densite of the holy wolves. Kolina Azmaria nodded. "I will make sure to come to your if I need anything." A small wag of her tail was enough to show that Azmaria meant what she said. Afterall, this Ira was very kindly and appeared that she would hold up to her word. That's what alpha's were for, right? They were the ones to help hold the pack together and that usually meant dealing with personal problems of each wolf as well as pack-wide ones.
"I guess it does." The wag of her tail increased at that comment for it emphasised how much Azmaria was now a member of the pack.
Ears swiveled to Ola, who stood a few paces away, as the old femme made her comment but did not emphasis. Azmaria knew the double meaning behind that phrase but did not utter a word about it. If Ola felt the need to keep secrets from the Ira than Azmaria wasn't going to disrupt those plans.
Azmaria looked from Orphen to Ola before dipping her head slightly. "I am ready when you are, Ola." Kimaria Orphen watched them go with a proud look on her face. Her first meeting as an alpha and it felt good. She pointed her nose to the sky and wondered, would Yasuo be back in a minute? Her heart pounded as she thought of him and she wanted nothing more than to make things official between them.
As Ola and Azmaria dissapeared into the trees she raised her head and sung to her mate, calling him to her. She had something to tell him, something important.Ah, young love. Ola chuckled to herself as she showed Azmaria the way. I's such a confusing thing. Lucky for me I've never had to deal with that sort of thing. The old wolf sounded pleased about it, but was she truly? The Maiden and the Crone are unable to love, we do not symbolise reproduction so we cannot. The only wolf of the Holy Trinity who can love and breed is Lewana's mother. The Holy Mother. She emerged out then into a clearing and hidden around it, masked by plants or small ledges were three dens. Lewana lay at one of the smallest ones, waiting for them. As they arrived, she stood and wagged her tail but did not approach. Kolina Azmaria glanced behind her as Orphen's voice filled the air with sound before turning back to Ola as the old female spoke. "It must be nice having a mate." She spoke. "You always have someone there beside no matter what may happen." She followed as closely behind Ola as she dared as the two moved through the packlands to emerge upon a clearing. Eyes were quickly drawn to the only figure there as her coat made her an almost impossible wolf to miss.
With her tail wagging gently behind her, Azmaria wondered if her den would be anywhere near Lewana's. She wasn't sure how the social interaction among the holy wolves went so she remained quiet and patient as Ola led the way. Kimaria Ola nodded, though whether it was in agreement or not was unclear. Friends can be like that too. She cast her eyes over to the white female and lowered her voice so that only Azmaria could hear her. It would be best if you didn't mention mates in front of Lewana. She is a dreamer and is easily shifted from her course. She must come to terms with the fact that she is a maiden. She quietened then and pointed her snout towards one of the dens that neighbored Lewana's own.
The den to Lewana's right is yours. It is a large den, meant to keep three fully grown wolves content, but for now it will be yours alone. Holy wolves are not so much different from the others. They still share dens, take mates and join in on everything except where they might be put in danger. Our holy wolves are loved and protected.
She paused then and bowed her head a little. This is where I must leave you. My den is a solitary one. Rest now and begin your lessons when you have rested. I will come to check on you tomorrow. With that she cast her stern gaze towards Lewana and departed.Lewana watched as Ola faded into the trees and trotted over to Azmaria with her tail wagging furiously.
What was she whispering about? You have secrets with Ola already? Is everything okay? Are you allowed to stay? Are you to be a thanu? Did they agree I can teach you? She gasped for breath and beamed up at the elder female with an innocent expression.
Yes, she as still so very young. Kolina Azmaria looked at Ola with a little surprise as the old femme spoke softly enough not to be overheard. Poor Lewana, was the only thing that Azmaria could think of once Ola revealed Lewana's forced chastity and unability toever get a mate. Lewana was such a kind soul and to think she would be forced to endure a solitary life was dreadful. Well, Azmaria vowed from then on out that she would not let poor Lewana be lonely. No, she'd stay by the white-femme's side as the best of friend she could possibly be.
Eyes shifted to the den that Ola pointed out and a small wag of her tail followed after. Wonderful she'd be right next to Lewana. She'd be able to keep a good eye on her friend and make sure things were alright. As Ola made to leave Azmaria bowed her head slightly. "Thank you, Ola." She watched as the old wolfess left to return to her den before an almost bouncing white form took over her vision.
Chuckling Azmaria tried to quell Lewana's bursting energy and questions. "It was nothing important, just about my pain. I am allowed to stay, I am a Thanu, you can teach me and did I get all your questions?" With a wagging tail, Azmaria watched the young she-wolf. It was times like these that she missed the innocence of being a pup but she had lost that the day she left her pack even if she wasn't a pup in age anymore. "I'll be taking th eden next to yours." She pointed out. "We'll be neighbors." She winked. "So if you ever need me, and I mean it Lewana, if you -ever- need me you'll know where to find me." Kimaria Lewana beamed and nodded her snout vigorously up and down. Yes I think so...well actually...I can't remember what I asked now! She bounced in a circle, coming back to face Azmaria.
It was true that often she wished she could find a mate but for now she was content. She was still young and the whole idea about not being able to 'settle down' had not fully come to terms with her yet. She had accepted her role as a pup and now she would have to live with that decision. Plus, she was sure her mother was proud of her.
I'm glad you'll be close by, this place can be very lonely sometimes, especially since it's usually only me and mother. She glanced towards the den further away from theirs and wondered whether she lay inside. I'll introduce you to her later. For now I think we should both get some rest. You must be tired because I know I am! Kolina Another chuckle escaped the tan-hued femme. Lewana certainly had a personality about her and was surely going ot keep Az on her toes. The little bouncing ball of white was just full of energy. Maybe Lewana would be enough to help bring back Azmaria's old self.
Azmaria glanced in the direction Lewana had looked. "It wo uld be nice to meet your mother sometime." She turned back to Lewana. "If she is anything like you then I am sure we'll get along but for now some rest sounds wonderful. So much has happened tonight and I think my poor brain needs some extra time to completely decipher it all." The femme moved toward the den next to Lewana's. She glanced inside and noted, like Ola said, the size of it. The den would surely fit three wolves comfortably. Turning back to Lewana Azmaria wagged her tail. "I'll see you in the morning Lewana. I'll need whatever help I can get to really get comfortable here and since you -are- my teacher we might as well start as soon as she can." With a wink Azmaria turned and entered her new den for some well deserved rest. Kimaria With a nod the little femme watched as Azmaria went towards her own den. I'll introduce her tomorrow if you like. She replied, then with an understanding nod she moved over to her own den. It was small, meant only for one female but it was hers and hers alone.
It was safe.
Goodnight Azmaria. She whispered, then she slunk down to lay curled up snug, her nose angled up to the entrance so that the sunlight would catch on her face the moment it grew light.
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:16 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- In The Light Of The New Moon---------------------------------------------------------------- Yasuo, Orphen, Lewana, Azmaria, Ola, Kalani, and the Holy Mother
Old Posts from 2007(ish)ice_demon_20
Yasuo slunk out of the den he and Orphen shared. He had lost track of the days that they had been in the new lands. With each passing day, they've had many lessons on the ways of their new pack. Some days his head hurt from the amount of knowledge he was learning and there were some days that he wished he could sleep in a little bit. But it was well worth it. Gazing up at the sky, he saw that there was no moon. That troubled him slightly.
Sighing, he flicked an ear slightly and sat down near the entrance of the den. He knew that Orphen would still be asleep, but something was bothering him tonight. He couldn't sleep very well tonight and the few hours he did sleep were in a light doze. Closing his eyes briefly, he pinned his ears back, allowing his mind to wander slightly. He hadn't seen any of the other pack members yet, but that was all due to his futile attempts to hunt. He had yet to see something bigger than a rabbit. It seemed that something had scared away the larger game.
Opening his eyes, he gazed into the blackness of the forest. He hadn't expected the new moon nights to be this black, yet here was proof that nothing was as it seemed in these new lands. "Bothersome moon," he muttered under his breath, clearly annoyed by the blackness of it. "Why don't you shed a little light on us."
Kimaria Orphen felt him stir but she did not open her eyes just yet. She would wait first and then take him by surprise. What better night than to tell him when the new moon was up in the sky and the ceremony almost upon them. Ola had explained the ceremony to them the night before, how they should dance around Amen in praise of Cerridwen. To Orphen it sounded like fun, but she knew it was serious for the wolves who truly believed in her.
Orphen still had doubts, but she had seen proof too, proof in the faces of Ola and briefly, Lewana. They were part of the Goddess, the Holy Trinity!
Then she stirred and moved out into the blackness of the night, lowering herself into a playful bow. She would pounce him first and then she would tell him, yes that was what she would do.
Or she would have done if the howl hadn't echoed up around the forest.
Yasuo? She questioned, ears perking up. It was instinct but she raised her head and gave an answering howl, the high-pitched tone a welcome.
Has it begun? She sounded a little nervous now for she was not sure what to expect, but now, now she was sure. With a shake of her head she set off through the trees, heading straight for the scared pool. They had not been here since their first day, bathing to purify themselves, now fnally they were allowed back.---- Ola looked up, glancing towards Lewana who was standing beside her. Unlike every other time, the little she-wolf was serious now. She had her duty to do and she would do it well. Ola had faith in her and why wouldn't she? Lewana had proved herself many times before. Now, finally they had another holy wolf to join in the ceremony.
Azmaria.
She turned her head to gaze sternly at Lewana, watching her carefully.
How do you fare?I am fine, Grey Mists. Lewana whispered, using Ola's sacred name as she usually did in the ceremonies. Lewana had not yet recieved her holy name and that was beignning to worry her. Shouldn't she have recieved it by now?
She raised her head high as she spotted the alphas on the distance and raised her head to howl, for it was she who was doing the summoning.
With the alphas here that meant only three more wolves to come. Her mother Claire, Kalani and Azmaria. Then, then she would do her duty to Cerridwen.
She turned her eyes up to the sky and wondered, wondered where Cerridwen was that night. Then she realised. Cerridwen was not up there at all, she was down in, within her. Remove Kalani had been wandering around the lands on his own, he did so often, after all there wasn't many others to talk to and his aunt wasn't always the best company, he adored her but she was his aunt more then a friend and then Lewana, nope she was just confusing but he blamed that on her being female more then anything else.
He had also been deprived of male company from a young age, growing up along side the females of the pack, he had grown very protective of them, but who wouldn't when they were his only family?
He knew where he had to be heading now, it wasn't something that he was happy about though. He hadn't met the Alpha's yet and he was still sceptical, they were coming in to lead the pack and maybe it was just Kalani felt as if they were intruding into his family, either way he had to let the feelings slip aside. He let out a sigh before heading on.
It didn't take long before the others came into view. He hung back a little and just watched for a bit. He didn't want to join them yet, it meant accepting them and he was still reluctant to do so. Kolina Azmaria had taken to exploring the packlands when not in lessons with Lewana. It was a nice change of pace and helped clear up her mind. With each passing day Az had been pushing the boundaries of her pains trying to figure out if these headaches truly were from manifesting seer powers that Ola believed them to be. If that was truly what the pains were then Azmaria wanted to conquer them. She wanted to make sure there was nothing that would stand in her way of making herself a useful pack member.
Tonight...
Tonight would be the first night that Azmaria would step foreward and do a job of Thanu. Witht he new moon rising it was only a matter of time until the wolfess would be thrust into her job.
She hoped she wouldn't forget what to say...
The sound of a wolfs voice echoed across the packlands. Azmaria's head snapped up. It was Lewana doing the summoning. Not wanting to waste another moment Azmaria hurried towards Amen all the while hoping that her pains would not interfere tonight. She hoped that she would be able to keep herself a float among the rest of the packmembers and not crumble in fits of pain.
Arriving at Amen, Azmaria moved to stand near Ola and Lewana. Her eyes gazed upon the other wolves that had collected. She had yet to meet all the pack members and tonight she would at least see them all.
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Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 5:17 pm
---------------------------------------------------------------- Time For A Lesson---------------------------------------------------------------- Lewana and Azmaria
Old posts from 2007(ish)Kimaria She wriggled her nose and that was the only sign the female was alive. She was lying on her back, forepaws tucked against her chest with the dappled sun on her belly.
She was lying in the clearing of the densite, preparing herself to give a lesson. She had to do well to prove herself to Ola! To prove herself to everyone! She knew she could do it and she knew deep down that this was an important step in her life.
However, until Azmaria arrived there was nothing for the little white female to do but wait. Wait and watch the clouds float by her head. Firstly she would tell Azmaria how well she had done, then she would explain more about The Trinity and the Holy wolves, it was important Az understood that first.
The rest could come later. Kolina Azmaria had enjoyed the new moon ceremony. It had gone well and surprisingly, she had managed not to fumble up her role in the ceremony which was a perk. Overall the wolfess could see herself falling into routine with this pack soon enough and with that routine would come a sense of belonging and home. For now though she had a great deal to learn and by the height of the sun she should be meeting with Lewana.
Slipping out of the forest the bordered the clearning around the den, Azmaria's eyes quickly found the white femme that was to be her tutor. It was odd really, to think of one younger than she teaching her but Lewana was well knowledged in the pack so she would be one of the best to learn from.
Moving across the clearing at a fairly brisk pace with her tail wagging, Azmaria once again pushed the boundaries of her tolerance of pain. Only a wince showed the wolfesses discomfort but she pressed on until she was a mere yard away from Lewana. It was a giant leap, yes, but Azmaria felt most comfortable around the white she-wolf so Lewana was the one whom Azmaria tested her boundaries around the most. Tail wagging to hide her discomfort, Azmaria looked at Lewana expectantly. "I am ready when you Lewana." She cocked her head to the sid eplayfully. Kimaria Oh, Azie! Lewana rolled from her back and pulled herself up onto her paws, shaking any dirt that might linger on that pristine pelt. You sure were quiet! I never even heard you coming. It's a good job Ola wasn't around to see that or she'd have nipped at my ears. She lowered them as if the old wolf might still be around. Then she suddenly remembered why Azmaria was here.
Oh! That's right. It's teaching time, I almost forgot! She would have blushed if it had been possible.
I think you're a natural at this, you did so well at the ceremony! Ola was very pleased with how it went. She said that there will be more new faces on the way, who knows! Maybe this pack can be on its way to being great again! Cerridwen will be so happy. She shook her head and sat, curling her tail up and over her forepaws.
Well, anyway, today I'll teach you about The Trinity and the rules for a holy wolf like us. She beamed with pride. I'll try to explain it so that it's not all jibberish, but tell me if you get confused. I'm not so good at explaining things sometimes. Kolina Azmaria chuckled. "Ola expects so much from you but you're still very much a pup yet. Don't worry, you'll eventually start getting what Ola wants and it'll become second nature to you. Having other sneak up on you isn't hard especially if you're enjoying yourself." She winked before lowering her hindquarters to the ground to sit.
"I won't lie. I was very nervous about the ceremony." She said with slightly lowered ears. "But like you said, it did go over well. I am glad Ola approved."
As Lewana continued Azmaria nodded. Her ears were foreward and ready to catch everything that Lewana said. She didn't want to miss one detail. "Well I am all ears and ready to go. I just hope I can learn it all. It seems, from what I saw and heard, that there are quite a few things that I need to learn." Kimaria She wagged her tail and nodded. I wish I weren't a pup anymore! Then she tipped her head thoughtfully. Actually I'm glad I'm not all grown up yet. Then with a nod the little wolf turned her pink nose up towards Azmaria and cleared her throat.
Okay, I'll talk to you about the Maiden first, since I know most about her. She laughed and then looked a little embarrased. Maiden's are born usually to the Holy Mother, though in truth they can be produced from anyone within the pack, holy wolf or not. They are usually plain in appearance, white or light grey. Their colour is important because it symbolises purity and innocence. However, before Cerridwen chooses the Maiden, the pup is asked whether it is what they desire. I said yes because I wanted to be a part of Cerridwen...but sadly when I was a baby I had know idea what it would be like to...to not have a mate, to not be touched by anyone.
She moved on then, steering away from the subject of mates. To stay pure I cannot be touched by any wolf other than holy wolves. If I am touched by an outsider then I am condemned a sinner and am forced to bathe in Amen until I am declared 'pure' enough. The Maiden is very much alone in that sense, having a den to herself and never being able to share one with another. Then her voice grew quiet and sad. However, the Maiden is also the only wolf of the Trinity who can out-grow her position. When I am deemed too old I will step down and become a Priestess just like you.
Then she turned to more joyous things. But you might think being the Maiden is a bad thing. Sometimes it is, sometimes I am terribly lonely and I lay in my den at night thinking my heart will break. But there is something else inside me, something which brings me incredible joy. She paused and there was a deep and genuine love in her eyes.
Lady Cerridwen. Kolina Asking a pup to make a decision such as becoming the maiden when they hadno inkling of what the title entailed was not a fair way of finding one. In truth, Azmaria was sure that any pup who had ever looked upon the maiden with awe would jump at the chance to become one. Sadly, Azmaria knew that was part of the pack traditions that would never change afterall, if a wolfess knew the limits of being a maiden would they all opt to take up the position.
Looking at Lewana glow at the mention of Cerridwen Az had no doubt that the answer to that question was no.
"IS there a certain age in which a maiden outgrows her rank or is it determined by Carridwen?" Lewana tipped her head slightly as she asked. Kimaria Lewana nodded. Yes, a Maiden remains in her rank whilst she is able to produce pups. When I fail to come into heat I am deemed too old. You see, resisting temptation is proof of your loyalty to being pure. But when we are no longer able to have pups there is no temptation anymore. She didn't like the idea of never having pups but she knew it wasn't necessary. With the alphas here to raise new pups there was no need for her to add to the numbers.
The Maiden, as you've probably guessed, represents the new, the young and the innocent. Her time is when the sky is dark with a new moon. That is why I led the ceremony that time. At other times one of the other trinity lead.
She wagged her tail. During the moon ceremonies, Cerridwen leaves the heavens to descend on us. The Trinity are vessels, our souls enhanced to capture the very essence of Cerridwen herself. When we perform the ceremony, she will merge with us as one and speak through us to talk to the pack. She smiled. That was her favourite part. Being one with a Goddess was what made it all worth it.
She could feel the love of Cerridwen floating all around and see it reflected in the eyes of all who looked on.
There was a unity here unlike any other.
It was faith. Kolina Azmaria nodded. She couldn't imagine not being able to look foreward to the prospect of having amate and eventually a litter of pups. That was one of the few things that she looked foreward to. Mother had always seemed happy having all of her pups around so Azmaria wanted her own sometime. But to have pups, Az needed to find a mate. First things first afterall. One day maybe her mate-to-be will walk into her life. Still...poor Lewana. The small femme couldn't hide the sorrow from her eyes as she spoke of never having pups but Azmaria knew not to push the subject. Instead a little push for a change of subjec tmight help.
"I take it from what I gathered around the pack that each of the trinity leads the ceremony during their respective time of the moon's phases. When does Ola and your mother lead the ceremony and what is the purpose of the priests and priestesses? I know that we sometimes participate in the ceremonies but what is our purpose all around?" Azmaria tilted her head slightly as she questioned the younger female. Kimaria She nodded. Glad that Azmaria was asking questions. Sheliked being able to answer them, it mad her feel a lot more intelligent than she actually was. Yes, I'm of the new moon. Of new life and such, as I've said. She smiled. Ola, being the crone, represents the waning moon. She represents everything that I don't...in a way, though our meanings are surely linked. Ola represents death but not in the horrible sense. In fact the death she represents for us is much more hopeful than other wolves deem it. Because her death also represents a new, a moving from one onto another. Itis a new beginning but in a new world. In that way it's only a false death.
Ola represented much hope for the rest of the pack. It was probably why she was also quite a loving, grandmotherly figure to many. She was not harsh and cruel death that many thought it to be. So in our ways we both represent a new beginning.
She nodded then and turned to her mother, Claire. Hers was possibly the most wonderful of all the Trinity wolves, for she was able to take a mate and to love. In fact, it was encouraged.
My mother, Claire represents the full moon. She is fertility and the giver of life. She is wonderful! You'll love her. Then with a small nod she continued. It was clear she was enjoying the teacher role.
Your role in the pack is like this. If we were ill on the night of our moon ceremony and unable to take over, it would be one of the Thana or Thanu who owuld take over in our place. The other holy wolves are possible vessels in time when they are needed so long as they keep to the ways. As such, you will be cared forand protected in the pack. Like us, you will never be sent on duties that could do you harm, you especially Azmaria. Perhaps your role will bedifferent from the others because of your...gift. Perhaps not. That is up to Ola alone. For now, however, you may join in the occasional hunt, though never to give the killing blow. But you will never be put on patrol or sent out to track down sinners. You are far too important for that. However, unlike me, you are able to mate with any male in the pack, so long as the alphas deem it so. It is preferred that holy wolf mates with holy wolf but truly, if there is one warrior who you desireit will not be forbidden. She paused there.
Any questiosn so far? Kolina Azmaria tried to soak in all the information given to her. There was so much to learn and this was only the tip of the iceberg but she was dead determined to conquer this little challenge, along with another, larger one.
Questions? Oh yes, there were so many she could ask, but which one? Details weren't all that important right now. Instead Azmaria just wanted the basic gist of the pride's religion and standings before diving into the nitty-gritty but Azmaria's mind was beginning to change direction. Being with Lewana seemed to boost a sense of self assurance and determination. Maybe it was because the she-wolf was so faithful to her position in the pack and took things as they were, or maybe it was because of Cerridwen being channeled through the younger she-wolf either way, Azmaria was beginning to feel the need to try and conquer a rather particular demon.
With that state of mind, Azmaria took the initiative to move from her position which was a few feet from Lewana to sit directly next to the she-wolf. With such a close proximity Azmaria's mild headache blossomed into something much more. A mix of pain and...something else. A Type of tickling on her mind. She couldn't quite place it but it was something...something not all that unwanted. Looking to Lewana Azmaria ducked her head slightly. "I am sorry Lewana but...but I just feel like I have to do this now and I...I don't want to let that feeling pass me by. I fear that if I had let it go and not test my boundaries to their limits now that I would never get up the courage to do so later."
A small whimper escaped the femme as she closed her eyes and attempted to fight back the waves of pain that bombarded her. An inner monologue of self-assurance constantly played within her head as she kept the close proximity with Lewana, not daring to move away for fear she would never attempt this again. Kimaria Lewana loved teaching. It was good to have a responsibility for a change. Azmaria, too, seemed to be a great listener and she knew then that she would make a wonderful priestess. She had to admit that it took her by surprise when the wolfess came close. She didn't think she'd ever been so close to her friend.
Azie...I... But she stilled her voice. She wondered if this was something to do with her seer powers, the ones Ola had told her of. If it was then she might need to concentrate or something. But as she sat there, looking to her side nd into Azmaria's pain filled face she knew she couldn't just sit and do nothing.
She turned her head and licked the other femme's ears, just once. It's okay Azie. Though she couldn't help but think this might be a bad idea. She didn't want to be held responsible for hurting Azmaria. She didn't think she'd be able to live with herself if that was the case. Kolina Azmaria fought with herself internally trying to ward off the pain that continued to filter into her poor mind. It was such an overwhelming experience and one that Azmaria's instincts wanted her to back down from. Backing down was not an option though and Azmaria knew it. this was her time. This was the time to test herself and try to conquer this horrible handicap of her. She wanted, no needed to get past this if not just for herself then for the whole pack. Azmaria knew that her true worth in the pack would never been found unless she pushed herself past this barrier. Not only she would benefit from this. If these pains could be overcome then everyone would be able to benefit from the powers she possessed and Azmaria would finally get her life back again.
The warring in her mind was very much a stalemate. Nothing got better but didn't proceed to get worse. Eyes shut as tightly as they could be, Azmaria focused on her plight. Why couldn't she overcome it though? Why couldn't she push the pain away and find this power that Ola spoke of? It had to be there, it just had to be, but where? The waves of pain that rolled in like the sea upon the beach were non-stop and were doing quite well of hiding those powers from her. Her inner self tried to reach out and grasp at anything that may help but nothing presented itself to her. What was she to do!?
A sensation from outside her mind, pulled Azmaria away for a split second. The touch of another wolf. That was something she had not experienced in quite some time. It had to be Lewana, who else would it have been. The white she-wolf was the only one around unless Ola happened to...Ola...that's right! Hadn't Ola said something about embrassing the pain not fighting it?
With renewed hope Azmaria dived back into her mind and instead of errecting barriers to push away the pain she broke down the ones already in place and allowed the waves of pain to wash over her. Her body tensed as the pain flooded her mind but Azmaria didn't budge. No, she focused on willingly inviting the pain to encase her as she attempted to accept it and welcome it into her as part of her, part of the powers that she was to have. It wasn't an easy thing to do. Oh no, the aching wa near enough to make Azmaria finally give in and withdraw from herself but an inner concious didn't let her. There was a determination there that Azmaria just couldn't shove away and she proceeded to deal with the aches and pain as she tried various way to allow her body to cope with it.
Finally, a break way appeared. The pain receeded just as she opened herself up to the max. She left nothing in place that would inhibit the pain from flooding her completely. Instincts wanted her to throw up all barriers but the she-wolf fought that instinct tooth and nail as the waves continued to pound against her, but with each wave that rolled across her mind the next one was weaker.
After quite sometime of this Azmaria finally felt the last wave crash through and with it a strange outside sensation of worry bombarded her. Opening her eyes, the femme's taunt body sagged slightly from exhaustion but Azmaria didn't let that stop her. She instantly reached out and nuzzled Lewana, a few tears glistening in her eyes. She knew where that sense of worry was coming from. It was just too simple to deduct. "There's no need to worry Lewana, I am alright." She smiled at the young wolfess as she instinctively errected mental barriers to keep herself from sensing other thing suntil she managed to get her new found powers completely under control. Afterall, the last thing she wanted was to go insane from a bombardment of emotions and thoughts from other wolves. Kimaria Lewana had been worried. Exceptionally worried. She ahd looked into Azmaria' face and seen pain there. A pain that looked so horrible she feared that her friend might die. Okay it was a little over dramatic, but Lewana could bethe best worrier at times. Her ears were flattened back and her tail was curled up against her belly.
As she watched on the worried whine never left her throat and it soon became apparant that some sort of battle raged behind Azmaria's eyes. A battle Lewana would never understand.
Then suddeny she heard her friend's voice and after what had seemed like an eternity, the pain seemed to be over.
Azzie? Lewana's voice was a whisper. Then there was that smile and Lewana was convinced. Azmaria was better. In fact she looked better than ever.
With an overjoyed yip, the little wolf wagged her tail fiercely as she gathered her paws and arched her back into a playful bow. Oh Azzie, you're okay, you really are! She barked then and began her mad dashing, circling Azmaria as fast as possible.
I thought you wouldn't wake up! She exclaimed. Kolina Azmaria, tired and much wanting a nap from her endevour could help but laugh at Lewana's antics. The little she-wolf certainly knew how to keep Azmaria laughing despite anything that may got on.
"Yes, I am fine, if not a bit tired. Who would have thought that working inside your own mind could be so draining." A gentle wag of her tail gently brushed the grass behind her as she sat there watching Lewana's puppish antics.
"I...I hope you don't mind that I did that to you. I mean, I was pretty sure nothing serious would happen to me besides a raging headache if things went wrong, but well, I didn't know for sure and I doubt Ola would have been happy if things did go wrong..." She sighed and shook her head. "Anyway, I don't know if I am up for much more teaching today Lew. I doubt I'll be able to retain anything you tell me at this point." Kimaria She paused to catch her breath, tongue lolling as she panted. I had faith in you. The little wolf bobbed her head. You did really well. I'm just so glad that things are okay. She tipped her ears forwards and smiled. Uh huh, you just go get some sleep, we can continue when you're better. I'm sure Ola won't mind since you tired yourself out for a good enough reason
Do you need help getting to your den, or will you be okay?
She wasn't exactly sure how she was going to help, not without a lot of bathing afterwards, but if that is what was needed Lewana would do it. Plus she felt a little stressed. A nice bath might do her good. Kolina Azmaria stood shakily to her paws but once she got her grounding the trambling ceased. "I'll be fine Lewana." She smiled. "Thank you for offering but the den isn't far. I should make it without any trouble." The femme wagged her tail gently before turning in the direction of the dens. A nice long nap was in great demand right now and Azmaria was looking forward to curling up within the cool shade of her den. "I am sure I'll be up and moving by tonight. I'll make sure to come looking for you when I wake." With that said, Azmaria moved at a rather easy pace back to her home all the while pleased and content that her major troubles were finally over. Afterall, with the powers triggered now and mental shileds in place learning to control the powers and understand them shouldn't be all that hard. She was past the tough part and well on her way to being a seer.
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