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 Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 10:23 am
Chieftain Twilight SinfulGuillotine Chieftain Twilight it's a very difficult thing for me to even wrap my head around, let alone recognize when I see it. for one, I don't particularly connect well with people. for another, I generally try to always say what I mean and mean what I say. and I try to insist that others do the same, and treat them like they are (even if I don't actually expect them to). Well, I say what I mean when I'm being serious. Technically I say what I mean when I'm joking, too...I'm just not being serious, but that's still what I meant to say. I do generally try to speak more literally online, because jokes are harder to identify without gesticulations and vocal intonation, and because the people I'm addressing generally don't know me well enough to know the kinds of things I would never say and actually seriously mean. But, old habits die hard. It's less of an issue in more serious conversations, where my tendency is to over-explain (online or offline), because in that situation, it's very important to me that I'm properly understood. I often even go so far as to read my own words back to myself, identify the various ways in which they could potentially be misunderstood, and edit in further clarifications before posting. But in more light-hearted conversation, I tend to be a lot less obsessed with being misunderstood because I'm not really making any serious points or arguments. you really are very detail-oriented, aren't you? I get the impression that you overthink everything. xd I've never really thought of myself as being detail-oriented, but I guess I probably am. I guess as a musician I kind of have to be. I've certainly been known to over-think things. For as long as I can remember, I've had a tendency to be a very emotional person (probably over-emotional in many cases). I seem to just have very strong emotional reactions to situations (both positive and negative, but since we're usually the most uncomfortable with negative emotions, it was my negative emotional reactions that were the most problematic for me), and especially in childhood and adolescence, those internal emotional reactions would affect my outward behaviour in very obvious ways, and I seemed to have very little ability to consciously control that, which was incredibly embarrassing at times. I found that the most effective way for me to control these emotional outbursts was to break down and analyse these situations (and my reaction to them) as objectively as possible, and to ultimately convince myself that there was no logical reason for me to be so upset. By now, that process has been my emotional lifeline for so long that over-analysing and over-thinking everything has sort of become second nature. Much of the time I'm not even consciously aware that I'm doing it. On a completely unrelated note...God ******** dammit, my cat totally just ate all the toppings off my pizza. Sneaky b*****d. I was really looking forward to eating that. emo
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 2:30 pm
SinfulGuillotine Chieftain Twilight SinfulGuillotine Chieftain Twilight it's a very difficult thing for me to even wrap my head around, let alone recognize when I see it. for one, I don't particularly connect well with people. for another, I generally try to always say what I mean and mean what I say. and I try to insist that others do the same, and treat them like they are (even if I don't actually expect them to). Well, I say what I mean when I'm being serious. Technically I say what I mean when I'm joking, too...I'm just not being serious, but that's still what I meant to say. I do generally try to speak more literally online, because jokes are harder to identify without gesticulations and vocal intonation, and because the people I'm addressing generally don't know me well enough to know the kinds of things I would never say and actually seriously mean. But, old habits die hard. It's less of an issue in more serious conversations, where my tendency is to over-explain (online or offline), because in that situation, it's very important to me that I'm properly understood. I often even go so far as to read my own words back to myself, identify the various ways in which they could potentially be misunderstood, and edit in further clarifications before posting. But in more light-hearted conversation, I tend to be a lot less obsessed with being misunderstood because I'm not really making any serious points or arguments. you really are very detail-oriented, aren't you? I get the impression that you overthink everything. xd I've never really thought of myself as being detail-oriented, but I guess I probably am. I guess as a musician I kind of have to be. I've certainly been known to over-think things. For as long as I can remember, I've had a tendency to be a very emotional person (probably over-emotional in many cases). I seem to just have very strong emotional reactions to situations (both positive and negative, but since we're usually the most uncomfortable with negative emotions, it was my negative emotional reactions that were the most problematic for me), and especially in childhood and adolescence, those internal emotional reactions would affect my outward behaviour in very obvious ways, and I seemed to have very little ability to consciously control that, which was incredibly embarrassing at times. I found that the most effective way for me to control these emotional outbursts was to break down and analyse these situations (and my reaction to them) as objectively as possible, and to ultimately convince myself that there was no logical reason for me to be so upset. By now, that process has been my emotional lifeline for so long that over-analysing and over-thinking everything has sort of become second nature. Much of the time I'm not even consciously aware that I'm doing it. On a completely unrelated note...God ******** dammit, my cat totally just ate all the toppings off my pizza. Sneaky b*****d. I was really looking forward to eating that. emo I actually reject the idea that negative emotions are what cause us pain. I feel that realistically, pain causes negative emotions. and ultimately, experiencing an imbalance of positivity and begativity or expressing them in an unbalanced way -- whether it is more positive than negative or more negative than positive -- is unhelathly and harmful. while I do agree that analyzing and examining emotions i sthe healthiest and best thing to do, and that being logical is more important behaviorwise than being emotional... it isn't that feeling an emotion is illogical or bad... but that making decisions based on that emotion is unhealthy and detrimental. feeling the emotion is actually very important and necessary for your health. remember, your emotions don't define you. just because you feel angry, doesn't mean you are angry.
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 4:14 pm
Chieftain Twilight I actually reject the idea that negative emotions are what cause us pain. I feel that realistically, pain causes negative emotions. and ultimately, experiencing an imbalance of positivity and begativity or expressing them in an unbalanced way -- whether it is more positive than negative or more negative than positive -- is unhelathly and harmful. while I do agree that analyzing and examining emotions i sthe healthiest and best thing to do, and that being logical is more important behaviorwise than being emotional... it isn't that feeling an emotion is illogical or bad... but that making decisions based on that emotion is unhealthy and detrimental. feeling the emotion is actually very important and necessary for your health. remember, your emotions don't define you. just because you feel angry, doesn't mean you are angry. While I agree that emotions are not inherently bad or unhealthy in and of themselves, they do become problematic when one's emotional reactions are so intense that they begin to hinder day-to-day life. My problem has never been with the emotions themselves, but rather with my ability to control them enough to be a functional human being.
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2014 4:22 pm
SinfulGuillotine Chieftain Twilight I actually reject the idea that negative emotions are what cause us pain. I feel that realistically, pain causes negative emotions. and ultimately, experiencing an imbalance of positivity and begativity or expressing them in an unbalanced way -- whether it is more positive than negative or more negative than positive -- is unhelathly and harmful. while I do agree that analyzing and examining emotions i sthe healthiest and best thing to do, and that being logical is more important behaviorwise than being emotional... it isn't that feeling an emotion is illogical or bad... but that making decisions based on that emotion is unhealthy and detrimental. feeling the emotion is actually very important and necessary for your health. remember, your emotions don't define you. just because you feel angry, doesn't mean you are angry. While I agree that emotions are not inherently bad or unhealthy in and of themselves, they do become problematic when one's emotional reactions are so intense that they begin to hinder day-to-day life. My problem has never been with the emotions themselves, but rather with my ability to control them enough to be a functional human being. you don't have to control your emotions. you just have to not be controlled by your emotions.
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