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 Posted: Sun Aug 18, 2013 8:58 pm
Brothers and friend, I would like to point out that when Jesus said, "if a man looks at a woman lustfully, he has already committed adultery with her in his heart," he meant it. Obviously, the words are not indicative of physical adultery, but they are also not to be written off. Two things here: one, this scripture does not disregard human nature, but takes it into account, and tells us where to focus in order to obey God. By avoiding looking lustfully, you avoid thinking lustfully (to an extent). The next step is in your heart itself, where you are to "bring your thoughts into obedience", and thus think with the mind of Christ. I use heart and mind here interchangeably because the "heart" is actually the emotional and ephemeral part of the mind, where thoughts are not words, but rather desires. Two, we're not supposed to lust EXCEPT AFTER OUR SPOUSES, because lusting after your wife is most assuredly not adultery. As to masturbation being sin, I believe you all know my stance, and I wish for you to at least consider my words, and where they come from, and how much struggle was necessary for me to be able to say those words without guilt.
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Posted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 7:43 am
I have something that I'm just going to toss out for anyone to comment on. I think its relevant enough here to not merit its own thread, at least for now, but past discussions/debates I've had with people on issues regarding lust in general usually come down to one pretty subjective question: What is lust?
And I'm not asking for you to copy-pasta something from a dictionary, I mean what is lust religiously, spiritually, and practically? I've heard a lot of different answers, and I'm curious to hear what you all think.
One of the answers that seems to be the most automatic (for obvious reasons) is that lust is sexual attraction, or at least is closely linked with sexual attraction.
But sexual attraction is most definitely a part of human nature, and indeed a necessity for a population that doesn't survive solely on rape in order to reproduce. Sexual attraction is what drives the chemical changes in our bodies that makes sex both appealing and pleasurable....and biologically possible. So clearly sexual attraction in and of itself is not a bad thing. So then what separates sexual attraction from lust?
I've heard people say both that between a married couple, the attraction they feel towards one another isn't lust, I guess the basic reasoning being that lust is a sin but sex between married spouses is not, thus whatever drives the sexual attraction between married couples cannot possibly be lust. Alternately, many people have said that lust towards your spouse is the only lust that is not sinful.
I have problems with both these answers, because what of the attraction that draws people together before they're married? Obviously within a healthy adult relationship there is a level of sexual attraction between partners regardless of marital status, and I'm not really convinced that such attraction goes through any drastic psychological change within people when they get married. Because they're married, it is now a-okay to act on these feelings, but does that mean that if such feelings existed before any given couple's wedding night (which presumably they do), are those feelings sinful? Does lust stop being lust when it evolves into romantic love? Does love have an element of lust to it, or is sexual attraction borne out of love something different?
I think the answer that works best for me (and is not something I thought up, I'm blatantly borrowing someone else's intellectual property here) is that lust is attraction without respect. It's objectifying a person sexually and not seeing them as a complete human being, but merely as a sexual object. When Jesus warns against looking at people with lust, He is not telling us to be ashamed of the natural sexual attractions we feel, but rather to be careful to not be so blinded by the desire to go for a roll in the hay with someone that you lose sight of their humanity. Relationships that evolve and grow, the sorts of relationships that have the potential to turn into happy marriages, may be full of mutual sexual attraction, but it's paired with respect for one's partner, and seeing them as a whole rather than a hole (I do take credit for that HILARIOUS pun).
...maybe this should be its own thread.
But anyway, I'm curious to hear what others think.
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