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So, this past Christmas, I got all my siblings rings set with their birthstones. I'm not made of money, so they were all set in sterling silver rather than gold, but I didn't puss out on the stones. Everyone got a ring with a genuine precious or semi-precious stone in it. And I put a lot of thought into it, and tried to get rings that not only had the correct centre stone, but also searched high and low until I found rings that suited each of my sibling's personal taste and style. It took me about four months to get them all.

For example, I have a sister whose birthstone is amethyst, but her favourite stone is opal, so I found her a ring with a small amethyst centre stone that was accented by beautiful Australian fire opal. My brother will only wear rings on this thumb, so I found him a wide silver band set with a (small, admittedly) diamond. Another of my sisters loves Claddagh rings, so I got her a beautiful Claddagh ring set with a ruby in the centre. You get the point.

For my mother, I got her a necklace with a cross pendent set with all the birthstones of her children.

I usually pick "themes" for my family's Christmas gifts, and this theme went over better than any of my other ideas. My mother cried when she opened her necklace and gave me the biggest hug and kiss she's given me since before our falling out. My mother and siblings tell me all the time how they wear their gifts every day and hardly ever take them off.

When my father died, he left me an envelope containing a letter explaining how despite the fact that we parted on bad terms, he loved me, he was proud of me, he wished me all the happiness in the world, and he'd have forgiven me if there had been anything to forgive. It also contained his crucifix that had been in his family for generations to the first born son, as well as his family signet ring (yeah, my family is old and snobby enough to have had one of those fancy signet rings passed down fro father to son). The ring was far too clunky and gaudy for my taste, although I still have it and have always kept it in my violin case for good luck. I put the crucifix on the day I opened that envelope and I haven't taken it off since, even in times of spiritual crisis, and even during the various periods of my life when I've identified as agnostic or even atheist. It was never really a religious symbol to me. It was a symbol that despite our differences my father loved me and as long as I wore his crucifix, I was always able to have a little piece of him with me. Some people think that the fact that I've never really associated this crucifix as a religious artefact and much more a symbol of my father's love for me to be bordering on blasphemy. But it's not as if I'm oblivious to its religious significance, it's just that for me, this particular crucifix is, in my mind, more attacked to my father than it is to the church.

My partner has a beautiful anthology of the works of Oscar Wilde bound in full burgundy leather, and he doesn't just cherish it because Oscar Wilde is his favourite writer, but because his mother bought him this volume at a church sale when he was five or six years old, and it was what introduced him to Wilde's work and was the beginning of a life-long love affair with the poems, plays, stories, and essays of the author. Prior to his mother's gift, he didn't know that anyone wrote that beautifully, with such a command of the English language. Henry's mother also died when he was 13, so the few things of hers or gifts she gave him that he's managed to hold onto are very precious to him, but this book is by far his most beloved procession.

On the slightly less warm-and-fuzzy side, one of my sisters recently broke off an engagement, and there's been some drama about the fate of the engagement ring that her now ex-fiancé gave to her when he proposed. The ring is not s family heirloom or anything, but it's a beautiful ring that was quite expensive. My sister wants to keep it, claiming that since it was given to her, it rightfully belongs to her to do with as she pleases, whether she sells it, chucks it into the Seine, or wears it on her right hand at fancy parties. Her ex feelings differently. He feels that because he paid for it (and paid quite a lot for it a that) and because she was the one who broke off the engagement, she should return it to him. He says that if/when he gets engages to someone else in the future, he sees no reason why he shouldn't just propose with the same ring.


Anyway, I know that we are supposed to not get too caught up in material processions, which makes sense for the most part. Material objects come and go, and in most cases the items that we feel deep attachment to aren't practical items that help us survive or even just help make our lives easier. But as impractical as most of these objects are, they often give us a lasting, tangible closeness to people who have either passed away or who we simply do not get to see very often.

I'm too tired to list out my usual spoon-ged questions, so just feel to discuss anything relevant.

Companion Cube. 'Nuff said.

Its not idolatry to feel attachment to a material object just so long as you don't worship it or turn to it in your time of need rolleyes

I have some items that are precious to me. My father died right before I had a chance to meet him but he kept some of my baby toys, pictures, and a small set of coins with my birth year on them. Although a couple of them are the wrong year because he wasn't completely sure I still keep them in the tiny jewelery box he put them in. My engagement ring is special to me too but I still think whomever pays for it deserves to keep it if they wish. If the ring loses it's purpose as a symbol of love between two people what value is it?
My mom has a ring like your mother's necklace. I think it's the coolest thing. I'm not sure what the ring itself is made of but it's adorned with leaf shapes in gold and rose colors. I guess I'm a little sentimental just like her. She also kept a stuffed animal each of us had as babies.