Welcome to Gaia! ::

Of course, this doesn't apply to any teenage girls in this guild. You all are wonderful, of course.

There's something about me that seems to make me a female jailbait magnet. It might have something to do with the fact that I look...very, very young. It's like I just stopped ageing physically when I hit 19. I'm 31, but if you just saw me on the street knowing nothing about me, you probably would guess my age at anywhere between 17 and 24. That seems to be the range that people most frequently guess. I've looked young for my age my entire life, and I'm just now getting old enough for that to be kind of cool. Prior to a couple years ago, it was the bane of my existence, but now I'm becoming pretty okay with it, for the most part.

However, the downside is that if I ever end up sitting next to a girl between the ages of 14 and 19 on public transit or something, she usually thinks we're soul mates. Eventually they usually notice my wedding ring and get all butthurt, and that would be the end of it...except that more often than not, they always have to say something like "Your wife is a very lucky woman." And I need to learn my lesson and just let our interaction end at that, but I usually respond with, "Yes, my wife is a very lucky man," just because the mental picture of my partner being my wife and doing wife things is something I find hilarious. But, of course, upon learning that there is absolutely no way I would ever be with them, finding out that I'm completely unavailable and gay (just like their favourite anime character zomg!), only strengthens their resolve to become my new bff so we can talk about "girl things." I'm not joking, at least three people have try to sell me on having a barely legal female bff to talk about "girl things." I don't talk about girl things. I don't want to talk about girl things. That's why I date men (well, it's not why, but it sure is a perk) and my only female friends are not especially "girly" in the traditional sense. No I do not want to go shopping with you, no I will not do your hair or make-up, and yes, those jeans make you look fat. evil

I wish it had been this cool to be gay when I was growing up. But since it wasn't, I find the whole "f** hag" culture to be pretty bizarre. I just don't think someone's sexual orientation should be a deciding factor in whether or not you want to get to know someone, and that goes both ways. Don't shun someone for being gay, but also don't latch onto someone like a leech just because they're gay. Being gay DOES NOT AUTOMATICALLY MAKE YOU AWESOME. Just like straight people, some homosexuals are super cool, and some are awful, and most are somewhere in between.

Anyway, does anyone else have any awkward social situations with strangers or near-strangers that they'd like to share?

I guess it is kind of funny.

I should make them start a fan club and give me money and buy me stuff.

Seriously, last week some girl told me that I looked exactly like her favourite gay anime character and gave me her phone number so we could arrange to do something together for Halloween. She said she'd make my costume. I am not going to call her.

If I was straight, or more bisexual than I am, and had no problem using young girls for sex, I would get SO much tail.

But, I am none of those things.

Hahahahahaha, if you do that, you will be my hero forever. FOREVER.